new poems

[Guest]

heart of the matter

Geez, I never thought I'd become an 'issue' .

Thanks for all the attention, I only want to share my work with other writers. And I especially appreciate the folks above who make it easy for a lazy lapdogger to find good things to read.

Palau: you are always a joy to read (and see, and feel).

best to all, Perdita

 

[Rybka]

Re: To Fish Person

I don’t want to interrupt this conversation,
Just, want to say thanks to fish,

~~~~~~~~~~~>°(((>< . . . .
(Yum! Thanks for all the wormses.)

Palua, I did not mean to say that the rest of your poems, or Angeline's, et al, were not "better" (IMHO) than the average crop of crap usually posted on Lit., but rather I hold you "real" (sic) poets to a standard higher than the... ah... "casual posting poet".
I just happened to feel today that most of the offerings by contributors who's work I appreciate was no better than average for them. - Still better than average for the Lit. board, but not worth singling out as special. - If people read the "New Poems" they will find them. Besides, it stirs up controversy and gets others to add their own comments in this thread . (Not that they necessarily/always know what they are talking about.)


Regards,                                 Rybka

 

[WickedEve]

Re: heart of the matter

Geez, I never thought I'd become an 'issue' .

Thanks for all the attention, I only want to share my work with other writers. And I especially appreciate the folks above who make it easy for a lazy lapdogger to find good things to read.

Palau: you are always a joy to read (and see, and feel).

best to all, Perdita

Be glad to be an issue. It's better than having us ignore you.

Angeline, thanks for mentioning my habit. It's best not to keep these things secret. I'm seeking treatment for it. Vibrator Users Anon has a 10 speed setting program. I've managed to go from a 10 down to a 4. I don't get the same buzz, but... Or were you talking about the site?

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Re: heart of the matter

Geez, I never thought I'd become an 'issue' .

I'm sure I speak for most of us in here when I say we're only sorry not to have more issues like this. We consider you a very valuable addition to our little pocket.

 

[Angeline]

Dear Friends,

I like to see us work together and grow as writers. We mostly do that. Perdita, you are a gem--a gifted writer and a lovely person. I'm very glad you're here.

Rybka, your reviews always end with a call for comments. I gave mine. They were not intended to suggest disagreement with you or that what you said is wrong. I was attempting to explain my opinion and my poem. As for my other comment, I wished to point out some of the other writers (myself included ) whom I think have written good narrative poems. That's good for people to know, right? Where's the controversy in that?

Now let's write poetry.

 

[Rybka]

Dear Friends,

I like to see us work together and grow as writers. We mostly do that. Perdita, you are a gem--a gifted writer and a lovely person. I'm very glad you're here.

Rybka, your reviews always end with a call for comments. I gave mine. They were not intended to suggest disagreement with you or that what you said is wrong. I was attempting to explain my opinion and my poem. As for my other comment, I wished to point out some of the other writers (myself included ) whom I think have written good narrative poems. That's good for people to know, right? Where's the controversy in that?
...

I don't know? You tell me. I have no problem. Why are you picking on me?

Regards, Rybka

 

[Maria2394]

new growth

Growing is such a good thing, and in my opinion, controversy, ( like this ) helps us grow. The first "thing" I posted here was so hard for me, and it really isnt as much a poem as pain flowing out, things I could never say to my mom, and ,,..well,.my point is, I have grown already. I lived in like, total fear of rejection, and the oh, I dont think I'm good enough angst. I hated it.
As for Perdita.. you know what? I like almost of her work, some I admittedly didnt understand at first, but I'm learning.

Many of you, and you all know who you are, have sent me very constructive feedback,( and I have submitted several edits with repairs) I hope you all know how grateful I am,and I try to do the same, but being so new to this board, I honestly dont think I know enough to judge other people's work, but I know what I like..I hope that counts
till later, Maria

 

[Palau]

did someone say 'so write?'
in a time so late at night
so kick the mule and get kicked back
it’s time to grace a stage
lean back on a stool

we buy our ticket
we pick our berth
we buy our ticket
some jerk legislates our birth
in a time of welcome home
we scatter, we shed our worth

 

[KillerMuffin]

New poems!

Tonight was a dud. We're back down to two pages of poetry, I've noticed. This isn't necessarily a bad thing since reviewing thirty+ new poems is just painfully involved.

There weren't nearly as many eye-catchers as I'd hoped. I found three gems in the rough.

Krenna Smart brings us Thinking of Him. This is one of those poems I don't like to read because of the subject matter, however it was done in a way that drew me into it anyway. I liked the metaphor quite a bit.

Boomerangue has an interesting little piece in Thank You, Old Scar. A little on the prose-y side, it could stand some editing, but as it is, it's still rather interesting.

oxalis was a little hung up today. Sorry, couldn't help it. Heh.

 

[BooMerengue]

Re: New poems!

Boomerangue has an interesting little piece in Thank You, Old Scar. A little on the prose-y side, it could stand some editing, but as it is, it's still rather interesting.

Thank you Killer- high praise, indeed! But I'm not sure what you mean. I just started this poetry stuff- I want to be like Angeline when I grow up! I truly would love feedback on my stuff so I can get it better. lol

 

[Angeline]

Thank you Killer- high praise, indeed! But I'm not sure what you mean. I just started this poetry stuff- I want to be like Angeline when I grow up! I truly would love feedback on my stuff so I can get it better. lol

Boo, you're a doll and ty for the compliment. However I spent a chunk of today reading poets like Anna Akhmatova, Yousef Komunyaka, and my beloved William Butler Yeats, and we both may be damn old before we grow up.

 

[BooMerengue]

Boo, you're a doll and ty for the compliment. However I spent a chunk of today reading poets like Anna Akhmatova, Yousef Komunyaka, and my beloved William Butler Yeats, and we both may be damn old before we grow up.

Appropriately hearted and tucked for further rainy days...this weekend I guess. I wish folks would give me more direct feedback... I'm trying to write a tribute and a sestina. If I'm screwing up somewhere let me know so I can avoid it. Cuz knowing me... I'll find another place to screw up!! lol

 

[Angeline]

Eve's not here

and it's getting latish so here are my picks from today's new poems list.


Aural Sex by dennis hale

When I've got her going good,
I bite my lip, and try
a frenetic Pastorius line,
picturing Joni Mitchell's face
contorted in the throes of climax.

It's a guitar right? This is about you playing a guitar? lol. It's really good. I hear it.

my heart by steve porter

if i take it out
and place it in your hands
will you caress it
will you make it hard
(because its entirely too soft now
as it is)...
i need somebody
to wrap their fingers around me and squeeze
but not too hard just enough pressure
to make me stand erect and pay attention.

This is one of a group of posts today by steve, and every one is a gem. This one is my favorite. My it's sexy, but it's sweet, too. I would have given it an E.

Contemporary American Poetry by perdita

Sexy Sexton with her diamond-cut eyes
her body parts arrayed among the words
the facets of her jewels.
Suicides should not be criticized.
That's what I learned from her.
I'm impressed she managed to live so long
with all that pain and thin skin.

One of two submissions today from Perdita, both good, but this one really is wonderful, whether you simply appreciate the structure and imagery, the references to some of the 20th century's best poets, or the surreally ignorant Suzanna who is so well-realized and so out of touch with herself (and perdita snuck an Oh Suzanna into this poem, lol).


There's Eve! I won't mention others then, other than to say that I concur with Eve that Rybka's poem and neonurotic's illustrated poem are both really good.

 

[Maria2394]

twilight

I just wanted to say I really loved Steve Porter's Twilight. The images of life and death at a junction, meeting and passing on without noticing is beautiful.. ( I would insert the link Steve, but I dont know how

Maria

 

[WickedEve]

7-01

The first day of July brings us 20 new poems. And I totally dig the first one I read:

Aural Sex
by denis hale ©

"my sunburst fender precision fretless
is petulant
at first, going in and out of tune
as I slide my left hand lovingly
from the nut to the twelfth fret,
and listen to her vent.

"I know baby," I whisper into her thrumming
front pickup,. "I know..."

Denis, I know, baby, I know I ask for it all -- but gimme more.

----------

Contemporary American Poetry
by perdita ©

Big Suzanne, the teenage girl in the upper division poetry class,
looks Egyptian or Greek, like the black figures on red pottery.
Ringlets fly away from her neck when she moves.

If I knew nothing of poetry and I read Perdita's Contemporary American Poetry, I believe it would be enough to stir my curiosity and have me delving into the lives and poetry of Frank, Anne and Sylvia.
And then there's Suzanne...

----------

Song of the SeaSon
by Rybka ©
A Song of the SeaSon

Smells of sea and advance in sun went
by
the way
the pictures of her still
form
the face
the hands
and needs
nothing more

And being needy
nothing more
I heard a treason in the sea
which never
asked the shore
for comfort.

Another well-written poem by Rybka. Though, in the above stanzas I did hear a whisper of Lenore, only a whisper and nothing more.

----------

A very attractive illustration by neonurotic:Feathers

----------

A couple more worth checking out:

twilight
by steve porter ©

Ready for the next one!!!
by pollyjean ©

 

[WickedEve]

Oh, I didn't notice your post, Ange. I was on and off the phone so much that it took me forever to submit this.

 

[Angeline]

Oh well Eve--I thought you might be busy with kids or some such. I'm sure our pals won't mind the extra mention.

 

[WickedEve]

Oh well Eve--I thought you might be busy with kids or some such. I'm sure our pals won't mind the extra mention.

No they won't mind. Most poets are attention pigs, wallowing in every review posted, waiting to be feedback slopped. My, didn't I paint a pretty picture? lol "oink"

 

[Cordelia]

Help, please?

I will be on my way to the green of Oregon this Thursday (of course, after Nevada, everything is green), so I will need you guys to fill in for me on the reviews.

I thank you all in advance. I will return next week, I promise. And I owe you all one!



Cordelia

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Enjoy the trip, Cordie. We'll take care of things around here.

Have fun and write us a poem about the green of Oregon, please. I've never been there.

 

[Angeline]

I love to be feedback slopped.

Petunia



P.S. Have fun Cordie!

 

[Guest]

2 for 1

Wicked Eve and Angeline,

I do thank you both for the reads and mentions


neonurotic

 

[denis hale]

Double Teamed

Eve and Angeline:

Tres kind, medemoiselles. Merci Beaucoup!

More to come Eve, always.

A Saxophone Motif, perhaps? Or how 'bout a vignette featuring that infamous Conga Player (see Female Orgasm Thread)!?!?!

And Eve, although I can certainly be swinish, at times, I prefer to think of myself as an "attention slut" who likes to be "feedback slapped."

Thank you both again.

 

[Angeline]

Or how 'bout a vignette featuring that infamous Conga Player (see Female Orgasm Thread)!?!?!

Let's leave Alejandro out of this, lol. I'm sorry I ever mentioned *him*.

 

[OT]

Hey, Happy Wednesday!

I'll mention a couple that bubbled to the top of my like list, but this is one of those days when you'll want to just go to the new poems page and make sure you don't miss anything.

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Oh, what a story teller ! I like how I started out watching a dancer and ended up watching her fall in and out of love. She ties it all together quite nicely.
Giselle in Hell by perdita

...
If I close my eyes I see Pavlova
praying at my tomb.
Like a dead virgin I long
to toss off my maiden's veil
set myself turning around myself
and dance a man to death
body and soul.

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If you're in the mood for a nice bit of alliteration and rhyme, look here: (It's too short to quote, and besides, you'll want to go give feedback or vote or something anyway, right?)
sex dance by Maria2394

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I'd sign up for this class...
Sex 101 by hollyh

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Look for equal opportunity in the realm of soul selling to be an issue in the next election.
Mid-Life Petition by perdita

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I think I saw Richard, or am Richard, or will be Richard. Go read about Richard.
richard is a well-dressed man by steve porter

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