new poems

[Guest]

Re: Struggles

I loved the imagery in this poem...and the "all's fair in love and war" vision, or perhaps the peculiarly male point of view that i got from it..

ssilversong

 

[Guest]

Re: The Iron Orchid..

Couldn't think of anything to say except...wow...and I wish I could write like that...smiles..

ssilversong

 

[denis hale]

Re: Tasty

Cordelia and T_F:

Thanks to you both
for the kind words!

I'm very glad
you enjoyed my Licks.

dh

 

[RazzRajen]

Re: new poems 8/14/03

Only eleven new poems today, with a few worth mentioning, so I shall.

~~~~~~~
For some reason, I am not taken with all of RazzRajen's poetry. The few I like, I really really like, but I feel he could use someone else looking at his stuff and helping him tighten it up, because there are gems in every single poem.


And it's merely an opinion, but I think some polishing could bring out some of those sparkles...

(And by the way, I love that you actually used a word I had to look up! "Couturier" really is a word! And a good one!)


Cordelia

Cordelia, many thanks for taking the time to comment on My work and quite effectively too. Noted what you said...Now I have to find that personal poetry editor....< Applications will be taken next week in person....>

Just kidding!.....


Again Cordelia , many thanks for noticing and taking the trouble to comment.

Razz

 

[Angeline]

August 15

Here are my picks for today. They're few, but they sure do run the gamut. Of course, if it were my review day *tomorrow* it would be easy to pick my favorite (that'll get a 5 outta me, baby, lol).

Today though, the poems I like were--IMHO--equally good.

Puppy Love by Denis Hale

Denis does doggy. Or something. An odd and interesting poem, as well writ as we've come to expect from this guy. Woof.

And then you began to dissolve
in a pink slurry froth
of bicarbonate
effervescence

Until all that remained
was me on all fours
in a pathetic waggle
of furry pant and whine
with floppy paws



Making the Bed by Tristesse

Simply beautiful, Tristesse. Read it and vote, everybody.

We were wedded in our bed,
Joined,
A single goal.
Moving as one, we sighed,
Sighs became moans
And - later - cries.

After
He rolled aside.
And we lay,
Smiling at the ceiling.


Clods, Fogs, and Clouds by RazzRajen

Very abstract and yet packed with clouds and colors and other vivid imagery--Razz wrote a great carnival of a poem.

Colours coalesce, pillars of creation
humongous clouds That ought to be cumulous clods
who is not wicked, goes to the other room
who is Mine stays
and barely survives
pain is in multifarious forms
some open , some slashed, some nefarious
take a number and file
Be here and be there



Have a great weekend, poets.

 

[BooMerengue]

Tres bien, Tristesse! Magnifique!

 

[Guest]

Merci mille fois, Angeline et Boo.

 

[denis hale]

Ange thanx

ange:

thanx for the encouragement on a poem i'm actually not so sure of myself.

you're entirely too kind, girl.

To reward you, i have some All Man lyrics that may interest you:

Allman Brothers Band - Angeline
==============================

by Dickey Betts, Mike Lawler and Johnny Cobb
(c) 1980 EMI Blackwood Music Inc., Pangola Publishing Company and
Milene Music, Inc.

Ridin' in a long gray limousine.
Sittin' in a pair of hundred dollar jeans.
Tryin' to talk sense to a rock'n'roll queen.
Damn, best kinda livin' anybody ever seen.
Oh, Angeline.

Chorus:

Lookin' at the bright lights, searchin' for the sliver screen.
I never seen a woman who could look so good,
and be so doggone mean. Yeah.
Oh, midnight struttin' in New York City.
Midnight woman, she is lookin' so pretty.
Her little heart beat in rhythm with the world.
She used to be her mama's little girl.
Hey, hey Angeline.

dh

 

[Disposa Girl]

Ange thanx
ange:

thanx for the encouragement on a poem i'm actually not so sure of myself.

you're entirely too kind, girl.

To reward you, i have some All Man lyrics that may interest you:

Allman Brothers Band - Angeline
==============================

by Dickey Betts, Mike Lawler and Johnny Cobb
(c) 1980 EMI Blackwood Music Inc., Pangola Publishing Company and
Milene Music, Inc.

Ridin' in a long gray limousine.
Sittin' in a pair of hundred dollar jeans.
Tryin' to talk sense to a rock'n'roll queen.
Damn, best kinda livin' anybody ever seen.
Oh, Angeline.

Chorus:

Lookin' at the bright lights, searchin' for the sliver screen.
I never seen a woman who could look so good,
and be so doggone mean. Yeah.
Oh, midnight struttin' in New York City.
Midnight woman, she is lookin' so pretty.
Her little heart beat in rhythm with the world.
She used to be her mama's little girl.
Hey, hey Angeline.

dh

Mon Cher,

Angeline is having une petit technical problem. It seems she had a tiny blackout. Something about her distribution grid overflowing and now she's, well, trapped and can't get into Literotica. She's blaming Canada. Ok, Canadians. Well, one Canadian.

In any case, if she were une joyeux like moi, she would not only be grateful, but really oh tickled cheri at your merci le plus généreux . Not to mention trois baisers délicieux. Yum.

By the way, that song is about me, not her. Disposa was *made* for midnight struttin and limousines, bébé.

A Bientot,
dg

 

[Lauren Hynde]

16th August 2003

Seventeen offerings in today's new poetry list, and some good reads among them.

-------------------------------------------------
The_Fool is responsible for the lion's share, with six new poems: the personal reflections of Insomnia and empty rooms, the delicate portraits of Rum Smoke and The Carpenter, the playfulness of Random Loco Motion. And then there's Angeline Blues.

Angeline,
have you seen
what life’s got
out there
for you.
Beware that jazz.
Beware those lonesome blues.
That trumpet cries,
That sax wails,
That drum beats out
the rhythm of your heart.
[...]

-------------------------------------------------
Maria2394 gives us a great poem about her secret (kinky) passion.

six mile cypress
by Maria2394 ©

Calm black water beckons
silvery moon beam lovers
Six Mile Cypress
would be my mistress if I had one

Her soft gray Spanish moss tresses
toussled and strewn over branches and limbs
reaching for full moon reflections
lapping at her feet

[...]

-------------------------------------------------
Those were the ones that caught my attention. There are also one or two new names that you might want to check out for yourself. Read, send feedback, vote... You know how it goes.

 

[Angeline]

The_Fool is responsible for the lion's share, with six new poems: the personal reflections of Insomnia and empty rooms, the delicate portraits of Rum Smoke and The Carpenter, the playfulness of Random Loco Motion. And then there's Angeline Blues.

Angeline,
have you seen
what life’s got
out there
for you.
Beware that jazz.
Beware those lonesome blues.
That trumpet cries,
That sax wails,
That drum beats out
the rhythm of your heart.
[...]

Clearly, he is a man of charm and wisdom, not to mention impeccable taste.

 

[denis hale]

HI DG!

Enchante
mademoiselle!

Avec plaisir!

J'apprecier que vous
aimer travail.

plus tard,

dh

 

[The_Fool]

Thanks Lauren

Hey Lauren,

Thanks for the plug. Most of those were salvaged from the "all of a sudden passion suddenly" thread. Like I told Ange once, I don't do a good job of saving and filing. Those were throwaways. So when someone resurrected the thread I posted them. Angeline Blues was fun. Ange and I had been talking about blues and Langston. Don't remember what made me write it as a caution. I remember the lightbulb for the phrase "Angeline have you seen..." and I laughed for the next 15 minutes.

Oh yeah, you will notice that even though Angeline said many nice things about me, the word "tact" was never mentioned.

Thanks again...

 

[Maria2394]

Re: 16th August 2003

[-------------------------------------------------
Maria2394 gives us a great poem about her secret (kinky) passion.

six mile cypress
by Maria2394 ©

Calm black water beckons
silvery moon beam lovers
Six Mile Cypress
would be my mistress if I had one

Her soft gray Spanish moss tresses
toussled and strewn over branches and limbs
reaching for full moon reflections
lapping at her feet

[...]

-------------------------------------------------

Thanks for reading my lust for the swamp poem Lauren.. and definitely for the mention... you are very sweet..and yes, it is my not so secret passion . I love the ocean and there is usually a swamp nearby ( six mile cypress is in Ft Meyers Florida).. anyone out there need an honest dependable horny beach-house sitter?? I'm available thanks again, maria

 

[Rybka]

new poems on 8/17/03

Today we have 25 new works and one “spinner”. Here is the "goldie" that I found for this Sunday. (It took 7 spins to find this gem by someone who does not submit nor post often enough. IMHO)
Citrus Lake by Xtaabay ©

Fractured glowing orange.
Glossy shell,
oily sheen,
soft white zest,
sugary beads of sun bobbing on ripples.

Fish piercing fruit orb,
self-propelled towards pulp.

Dragonflies quilt copper air in abrupt stitches,
padding lilies with light.

Under large log
muskrats sip tangerine tea and wait.

Frogs sing in citrine cycle
to the surfacing wedge of sky lemon.

Of the 25 submissions, I found none of exceptional merit. Razz Rajen , denis hale, and neonurotic provide readable poetry and newcomer Teshu shows us a couple of haiku worth looking at if you are already on the New Poetry Board, but I have read nothing today worth excerpting or commenting on. Most everything is average, either for Lit. poetry or for the individual poet. - Jeepers! Maybe I swallowed a Senna pill?

As usual, you are strongly advised to go read today's New Poetry, make up and voice your own mind. I am sure I have missed some poems that you may really like.

Regards,                                 Rybka

 

[Maria2394]

DEar sweet Boo!!!
there is, as you well know, a HUGE difference in being inspired by a poem written by someone and plagarism..I would NEVER accuse you of anything, and I would love to read about your special place please write it, ok? thanks for the beautiful, encouraging email...have a terrific day, maria

 

[RazzRajen]

Re: August 15

Here are my picks for today. They're few, but they sure do run the gamut. .


Clods, Fogs, and Clouds by RazzRajen

Very abstract and yet packed with clouds and colors and other vivid imagery--Razz wrote a great carnival of a poem.

[
Have a great weekend, poets. [/B]

Thanks Angeline for the mention and comments......


Razz

 

[WickedEve]

I'm going to be out of town a lot this week, and it doesn't look as though I'll be able to do the new poems for Tues. I hope someone can cover for me.

Thanks,
Eve

 

[darkmaas]

Monday, 18 August

A slow day today. Looks like Rybka had all the fun.


Start by reading Razz' Blockages, Sometimes It's a nicely hewn flutter with overtones of dark vampirism that drifts to a nicely ambiguous conclusion. My only complaints are the "cauldron of desire" (darkmaas is being over Potterized at the moment), and the too-clever-by-half word play (or is it Canadian spelling?) in the first line.


Then try on for size, score by air2o.The lines...

so we may
dance
two openings

forced me back to reread the poem several times.


Lastly, Goldengoddess has three poems today which I might have passed over except for Mistress Although it is a bit literal for my taste, it demonstrates a poet struggling to get out. (With your consent of course, the local word smiths would be happy to slice and dice. I promise it will only hurt for a little while.)


Respectfully,

darkmaas.

 

[Guest]

Re: Monday, 18 August

 

[Angeline]

Intresting I change my nic to avoid a stalker and my work is alot less excepted. Do me a favor dont slander me in your nasty thread anymore. I have nothing to prove to you. Cept I might autograph my book for you lol. Two of those poems have been published on ezines one more than once....as much of my work has. Only hurts a little while...pass me over do me that favor.
I wont suffer for that

I'll assume, as I suppose other reviewers here should, that you don't wish to be reviewed in this thread in the future. I've been published, too, and critiqued. It's always simply an opinion and not always high praise. I take it for what it's worth and try not to get too exercised about it.

Good luck with your publications.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Re: Re: Monday, 18 August

Intresting I change my nic to avoid a stalker and my work is alot less excepted. Do me a favor dont slander me in your nasty thread anymore. I have nothing to prove to you. Cept I might autograph my book for you lol. Two of those poems have been published on ezines one more than once....as much of my work has. Only hurts a little while...pass me over do me that favor.
I wont suffer for that

If you don't want people to talk about your poems, simply don't submit them. It's that simple.

To say a thread whose main objective is to garantee every new poem is read at least by one person is nasty is a very odd observation indeed. Do you care to elaborate?

Angeline is very kind, but I'm not. If I see good poems I'll comment, if I see poems that are bad enough for me to issue a don't-waste-your-time warning, I will too. It's my opinion, and if the author has any problem with it, tough. Grow up and prove me wrong.

And by the way. It's interesting that your work is a lot less accepted now? Is that it? Do you have any idea why?

 

[Guest]

 

[BooMerengue]

Angeline can tell you... NObody has caught flack for saying the wrong thing at the right time like I have! And frankly??? I don't give a damn... and she'll tell you that too

I read Darkmaas remarks... there is nothing hostile there unless it's between the lines in which case it should have been left there. (*sigh* I know..... I let someone draw me into the same kind of immature inanities here...once!)

GoldenGoddess... why take offense so easily? If you don't like what someone has to say just PM and say- (the rest of you turn your heads)- "Fuck you" and go on your way!

Just my 2 cents... I guess if I get to listen to it I get to respond, right?

*wondering what Ange smoked this weekend to go from Punker to Kewpie?

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Monday, 18 August