new poems

[JUDO]

New - 12-30-02

Sorry I am so late in the day with the new poems, but better late than never. To read beyond the excerpts listed below, click on the links. - Judo
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Tick-tock...

Singular, they slip
or are shrugged away.

One after another
they come and go

Irreversible Succession
by
OT©
---------------------------------------------------
And the time goes too slowly for some, especially new posting poets.

But now that time approaches when I will sit in a darkened room
and stare as the lights on the tree struggle to hush my thoughts.
But the silence is deafening and soon
my eyes will puddle with tears as I wish upon the twinkling blur

Hating the Holidays
by
Scallywag©
---------------------------------------------------
Mark Twain's lost cousin is heard from. Love it.

The path twines over yonder
'round those trees;
it weaves around
and between them.

Step lightly,
step quickly
upon that serpent's dirt back.

Into the Mountains
by
WickedEve©
---------------------------------------------------
A fun dance with just the right lyrics.

Together we pushed and pulled,
straining against each other,
the sound of wet flesh slapping
in the urgent race to orgasm.

whispers, growls and gritted teeth
by
silken_dreammaid©
---------------------------------------------------
It would make a great Dixie Chicks song, but sounds very deeply felt.

This is us, you said in all earnestness--
Cheap pizza and expensive champagne,
burlap underwear and silk wristbands,
soft caresses of rage and lovingly giving pain,
hiding like vampires from the sunlight
but walking naked in the rain.

Cheap Pizza & Expensive Champagne
by
RisiaSkye©

 

[OT]

Re: New - 12-30-02

Tick-tock...

Singular, they slip
or are shrugged away.

One after another
they come and go

Irreversible Succession
by
OT©

Funny, tick-tock was my orignal working title. Thanks for the mention.

 

[WickedEve]

Re: New - 12-30-02

Mark Twain's lost cousin is heard from. Love it.

The path twines over yonder
'round those trees;
it weaves around
and between them.

Step lightly,
step quickly
upon that serpent's dirt back.

Into the Mountains
by
WickedEve©
---------------------------------------------------

Thanks Judo. Cousin Mark would have been proud.
Almost didn't submit this poem because it mentions the devil and worth a sixpence mentions the devil and little white house and... Oh, I'm sure there's a 2 devil poem limit for poets.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

That's just for regular poets. The Wicked ones have a special exemption. I adored this poem, so thank you for posting. Maybe you should just keep on working the devil into poems--It seems to work.

 

[MyOpinion]

removed

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Opi--

At the top of Literotica's Stories & Pics main index page, click Login and that will take you to your member's page. From there, you'll see a Submit Work link. All you have to do is follow the instructions, it's not too complicated.

The poems (or stories) you submit will appear, upon Laurel's approval, in your page, which was created when you first registered. <here I wanted to post a link to your page, but search is temporarily down, so I have no idea where it is; but once you submit something, it will be easy to track it down>

 

[WickedEve]

And the poem will be listed with the new poems.

Also, you can start a thread to for comments about your poem or post to land's crit thread. This thread is for mentioning new poems already submitted to literotica.

 

[RisiaSkye]

Re: New - 12-30-02

Cheap Pizza & Expensive Champagne
by
RisiaSkye©

Thanks for the mention, sugar. What do I owe ya?

Happy New Year, everyone!

RS

 

[MyOpinion]

removed

 

[WickedEve]

Look forward to reading your poems, MyO!

 

[JUDO]

Re: Re: New - 12-30-02

Thanks for the mention, sugar. What do I owe ya?

Happy New Year, everyone!

RS

Hmmm... What does RisiaSkye owe me? :maniacal laughter:


- Judo

 

[OT]

Happy Different Year

Wow, three pages of new poems posted on this, the first day of 2003. Too many for my after-eve grog to sort through just now.

I did take a minute to romp through the titles and I don't think there was a title in the bunch that didn't peak my curiosity.

 

[MyOpinion]

OT

removed

 

[OT]

January One

Here's a couple to maybe coax a few poetry people to peek at the newstuff page.

----------

Sex With Kangaroo Dream by Lovegrrl

Whatever she had to drink or eat before going to bed, I'm thinking that maybe she ought not have it again.
Sorta freaky, maybe not poetry, but who could resist the title (not me).
It kept me reading to the end.

----------
morning (time to arouse) by Croissant

Nice Alliteration.

"your soft lips wrapped
around my arousal
your taboo open
to my tender tongue tip "


------------------
Deep End by WickedEve

A scene well painted.

Particularly good were the lines :

"from rotting deck
wet prints trail
to the house of before"


---------

oh quit whining!! by smithpeter

In addition to the great title, there is a laugh out loud line.
(I won't spoil the surprise by quoting it here)

 

[Angeline]

1/02/03

Good grief, did you all see how many poems were posted today? No? Lots. Here are my comments on a few that stood out for me. There were many that I thought were very good though, so good for us! Congrats to all Literotica poetry posters for starting the new year off right! Please take the time to read them all if you can.

Waves of Time by Chicklet

Waves crash against the rocks
Like thunder in the sky
Water sprays into the air
Time ceases to pass me by

A strong piece from Chicklet, laden with vivid images of a lonely seascape and the writer’s musing encroached upon by civilization. She is submitting some wonderful illustrated poems.


I hate to love you by Phoenix Wildfire


i hate to love you
and love to hate you

if you're strong
am i weak?
Cause you can't feel
the words i speak?
Can you fathom
how i need?
how i hurt...
or how i bleed?

i love to hate you
and hate to love you

I like this and hear a strong writer’s voice speaking. There are some typos and other language errors here that need to be corrected. Further, some might argue that a few parts could be streamlined, but the author keeps the edgy tension of love/hate moving. That carries the poem forward.



Gemstones by Weed

Mirrors rippled by tears
for the pains of others
Yet hardened against the fears
of others that would carve
a slave to caring
out of such a stony heart

Gemstones is one of a group of strong entries from Weed. They’re all good, but I love the sustained image in this one and the way the cold hard brilliance of gems works thematically to describe a heart hardened by hurt. Do take the time to read her other new poems.



saintly smiles by Croissant

underneath
serene saintliness
of the beatific mona lisa
lay bare skin, wetly parted,
fingers sliding up, hard
into the pink clitoral ridge
slick hairs, framing swollen pink lips
crying out for climactic release now, now...
mona lisa wasn't smiling
she was having an orgasm
while leonardo painted her in innocence
it's a secret only we know, now

Finally we know what’s up with that arch seraphic smile of hers. And while Leo was painting, too. I found this ditty from the prolific Croissant to be clever and amusing. And you know, reading it made me wonder just who was putting that smile on her face while da Vinci painted? Botticelli? Again, this is one of a group of strong posts from this poet; I could have picked one of at least a few others. Read them all if you have time.



Sacharrin by smithpeter

some slits are exposed
teasingly,
some brutally buried

some held
above the clouds
where frost coats whole stanzas
freezing meanings

copulating verbs and nouns
have feelings too

A quixotically lovely poem from smithpeter, who no doubt realizes that the Sun melts frost and probably burns off confusion, too.





.

 

[Rybka]

Poems of 1/02/03

Angeline wrote:

Good grief, did you all see how many poems were posted today? No? Lots. Here are my comments on a few that stood out for me. There were many that I thought were very good though, so good for us! Congrats to all Literotica poetry posters for starting the new year off right! ...

I must agree that there have been a lot of good poems already posted in 2003. And I cannot disagree with your selections. Of the ones you mentioned my favorite is Weeds':
Gemstones. I really liked the metaphor, and agree with your comments.

Don't forget to read the poems of 1/01/03. There may be some you have missed! I mention this because I submitted a poem as a Word file yesterday afternoon for the webmasters to edit so the display would be as I wrote it (something that is very important to me, and that the Lit. posting program has problems getting completely correct). It should have appeared in today's, or tomorrow's postings, but instead it was inserted into the submissions of 1/01/03. I did not know this could occur. I read, or at least scan, the new submissions every day. I wonder how many good stories and poems I have missed because I never knew that they were posted!
Could I have missed R. Caulfield's latest episodes, or the next installment of "Brian's Story"? And what great poems have I bypassed?

I give a link to "A New Dawn" below since it never was on the correct day's New Poem list, and I would like to have some feedback. At present it has one vote and one view.

Regards,                       Rybka

P.S. I tried to send this post to a moderator, but my reasons are not acceptable for such messages.

 

[Angeline]

1/03/03

Another heaping helping of poems was posted today. Here are the ones that stood out for me, but before I start, I need to rant for a moment about the incredible number of typos I noticed while reading the many many poems I did the past few days. Spell check is easy to use, and I know you all have it. C’mon! Make a New Year’s resolution to use that thing! (I know, I make typos too, but we’ll all try ok?). Rant off. On to poems.


State Street Bridge by Cordelia

He spoke of tobacco and old oak.
The ground was wet
and we whispered our names to the willows.
We spoke of the bridge
and those who loved beneath it.
I wrote a poem on a paper sack.
“Cottonwood,” he told me,
“that is the name they gave this town.”
Then the cold came.

I’ve yet to see a poem by Cordelia that is less than wonderful, and this one, with its vivid image of a lovers’ meeting--complete with song and flames of poetry--is no exception. She has a natural feel for language that evokes sensory images.

____________________________________________

Orpheus by silken_dreammaid

Treacherous Orpheus,
openhanded in generousity,
gifting freely the music to all.
Weaving an unseen trap,
captivating your audience -
a pied piper for tempting hearts.

Deceptive melody,
you sound so innocent,
softly threading your golden notes
into unwary hearts.
Gently beguiling -
a siren's song to steal the soul.

Silken_dreammaid is another poet who consistently produces wonderful work. I love the imagery in this poem about artful deception and the form is just solid--doesn't miss a beat. Has she got the knack or what? (as they um say)

____________________________________________





Mens Sana by tmt

Are you mens sana he asked
I told him I wasn’t aware of the facts

Are you compos mentis he inquired again
I told him that I thought that he should drop dead

You’re dementia praecox he said with relief
I went after the knot on his tie with my teeth

This is my favorite of a trio of posts today by tmt, all of which I thought were clever and interesting. He is a new or newer poet to Lit, I think. I went back and read through his submissions and really enjoyed them. Having been a commuter for years on New Jersey‘s ugliest highways, I particularly liked Poem to the Car on my Butt, which contains the following sentiment:

Oh car on my butt
Please tell me what’s up
Traffic is backed up ten miles or so
Yet you’re riding my can
In your new sports sedan
While jabbering away on your cellular phone

Maybe you’re stressed or
In some way obsessed with that
I am how I drive kind of view
Well I’m trying to relax
And ignore the fact that I’m
Stuck on this freeway with assholes like you

Boy, I’ve lived that! Anyway, tmt was my find of the day. Read and enjoy.

____________________________________________



On Dating Outside Your Species by Quasimodem


Casey would dance with the strawberry blonde,
And his glands flayed on.
He'd stride ‘cross the floor
With the object he bore,
And his glands brayed on.
With a brain, so corroded -
As pheromones exploded -
The poor girl would quake with his charm.
They left the dance floor
Like a John with his whore,
And their glands sprayed on.


I’m not exactly sure to which species Lit author and bulletin board bon vivant Quasimodem refers here, but the poem (a parody of the song “And the Band Played On”) is pretty damn funny. I was almost afraid to get too close, lest I get smacked down by all the pheromes flying through it.

____________________________________________


top listener by 03sp

doors dare not open
people dare not talk stupid
governments are self defining

on a path that is familiar
away from simile
I stumbled onto love

and poked not like a porcupine
but, by a porcupine
a hundred times

actually, it was not so bad
she was happy and I was sore
but besides the barbs it was not so bad


This is one of a group of poems submitted by a new poet 03sp. I like the way it dances around the notion of discovering an unexpectedly pleasant surprise. Is it me or is there something oddly familiar about this poet? Nah, couldn’t be.

____________________________________________


Nothing Gets Nothing by MyOpinion

To choose nothing
is to restrain
What would likely
be of gain,
Seek you fortune
Seek you fame,
To choose nothing
is utter shame.

This pithy poem submitted by MyOpinion puts me in mind of Grooks, which are also short, focused, and witty, by the Danish author and scientist Piet Hein. Opi has a few pieces in this style, and I especially like the sentiment expressed in this one.

____________________________________________


Beheading a Poem by WriterDom

leaving the body behind
bloody and headless
it wasn’t State sponsored
it was simply murder
in the first degree

not even a proper burial
just left to rot
among the hanging participles
dangling in the wind
a putrid wind
the smell of sentence fragments
with not even a Haiku
for a headstone


Here’s a poem that I can really understand: WriterDom gives us a short ironic piece (there were a lot of this type, I thought, in today’s offerings) about the cold-blooded murder (it was WriterDom in the Library with the keyboard) of a poem that wasn’t working. The tongue-in-cheek language references make this effort sparkle.


Phew. I am outta here for new poem reviews till next week. I’m glad you’re all so prolific--I really am--but next week could y’all be so on somebody else’s watch?

 

[OT]

one more for 01/03/03

Angeline (in a rare moment of modesty) neglected to mention one of her poems that appeared today:

White by Angeline

I'm a fan of most of her work but I admit to almost back-clicking out of this one. It starts sort of stiff and dry.

After reading it, it turns out that the un-assuming title and slow start are darn near perfect. The poem quietly builds in intensity.

I'm still (probably over) analyzing the techniques used to build the intensity.

Among the things I noticed:
Her choice of what to describe first and what to describe later, as well as how she describes them:
Longer, softer definitions first, shorter, crisp and vivid for late.
The introduction of repetition half way through, then a frenzy of three in the last quatrain worked very well.

 

[Angeline]

Thank You OT

In my poem "White," I was writing in the sequence in which the events occurred. It was not until I was done that I saw that the form built in a way that supported the theme. Oh, and the other thing that happened--as I was writing, thinking the poem was going one way and having it go another as so often happens to me--I was increasingly becoming aware of the images' relationship to the emptiness of the ensuing years. That dawning realization and my horrified recognition of it fueled the pace and the repetitions.

Does that happen to anyone else? You become so emotionally drawn into what you are writing as you write that it creates a synergy and spurs the poem on?

And OT?

Angeline (in a rare moment of modesty)....


I'm not THAT bad, am I? Gosh, now I feel like a meglomaniac.

 

[Rybka]

Re: Thank You OT

...Oh, and the other thing that happened--as I was writing, thinking the poem was going one way and having it go another as so often happens to me...
Does that happen to anyone else? You become so emotionally drawn into what you are writing as you write that it creates a synergy and spurs the poem on?...

I recently asked Wicked Eve the same question. - "Do your poems sometimes take on a life of their own and then go their own way?"

We both had to admt that it happens fairly often. - I suggested that it might make an interesting theme for a thread on this board.

What do you think?

Regards,                       Rybka

 

[Cordelia]

Angeline,

I thought "White" was incredible. Such vivid imagery, but not just for imagery's sake.

Got me a little depressed in its cynicism, though. I admit I read it 4 times, though.

Amazing.

And, by the way, you are a megalomaniac. It's one of the things I love about you.




Cordelia

By the way, thanks for the mention. I so rarely write free verse anymore.

And, Rybka, please start that thread....

(And I apologize in advance for being scarce here the next few weeks. I will be extremely busy at work.)

 

[Angeline]

Ok so I am

Cordelia said:

And, by the way, you are a megalomaniac. It's one of the things I love about you.

a meglomaniac.

sigh


but a nice, well-meaning (to people besides myself, lol) one. And you are--in spite of various cool traits you have that I won't embarrass you by mentioning--a sincerely modest person, which is one of the things I love about you.

Thank you for the kind words about White.

 

[WickedEve]

I read all 40 new poems when I got up this morning and there were quite a few good ones. I agree about Cordelia. I love that poem. I think I like every poem that was mentioned. I'm trying to think of any good ones that were left out...

There were, at least, half a dozen poems by ethereal~minx and they all have gardener in the title. I did find part of one rather good. This is a poem with potential.

this gardener's diary
by ethereal~minx ©
Mid-Saturday...
i nearly cried at the base, my hand-turned soil dry~~ my eyes caught sun's rays, seeing them i sighed~~ i am cherished, it shows in Your leaves of green, shielding me from sun's damage


Late Saturday evening~
Thick clouds hide bright nights
& her path she needs to see
To get back to her garden
To the solace beneath her tree
She is in despair, she sends message on the wind
Knowing He will respond, restoring her confidence within


And parts of Bloodlust and Sexmagick; a Duet by kittygrrl are nicely worded.

it was her scent

delicate
spicy
like ginger
sweet
like orange
that first caught me


I like this little poem. The Spirit of Bobby Jones
by WriterDom ©

and finds the quiet
inside the swing
grips it and rips it
a sixth of a mile

 

[Guest]

thank you for mentioning my poem angeline

 

[Angeline]

Thank You Eve

You are a trooper. I was burning out, but should have mentioned those other poems--they are good. And you know it has struck me that there is some really good poetry being posted here of late and much of it is from new poets to the site. I feel as if we are in a rebirth (I'm overly dramatic, I know).