polite submissives!

[s'lara]

your Dominant has an important meeting with another Dominant this afternoon...your Dominant has bad breath today...
...do you ignore it?
...point it out?
...If you point it out..how do you do so?
...If you point it out..why do you?
...If you ignore it..why do you?

-Do you ignore it? - Never. Part of the care and serving of a Dominant is to make sure you, the sub/slave, help Them put their best foot forward at all times. That is part and parcel with presenting yourself in a polite and graceful manner whenever possible (yes i know, reality dictates that subbies are not perfect).

-point it out? - Absolutely. Dominants are People as well.

-If you point it out ... how do you do so? - "Permission to speak freely? Thank You. With respect, please let me bring You something to freshen Your breath. i want You to shine today *kisses Them softly*

- If you point it out ... why do you? - Again, that is part of caring for a Dominant (to my way of thinking). If that is something They would not require or deem part of my duties, then this subbie would learn to hold her tongue.

-If you ignore it...why do you? - i would only ignore it if the Dominant has made it clear my care in that regard was unecessary.

 

[James G 5]

I can't believe I didn't get one SINGLE laugh *sigh*

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: polite submissives!

-Do you ignore it? - Never. Part of the care and serving of a Dominant is to make sure you, the sub/slave, help Them put their best foot forward at all times. That is part and parcel with presenting yourself in a polite and graceful manner whenever possible (yes i know, reality dictates that subbies are not perfect).

-point it out? - Absolutely. Dominants are People as well.

-If you point it out ... how do you do so? - "Permission to speak freely? Thank You. With respect, please let me bring You something to freshen Your breath. i want You to shine today *kisses Them softly*

- If you point it out ... why do you? - Again, that is part of caring for a Dominant (to my way of thinking). If that is something They would not require or deem part of my duties, then this subbie would learn to hold her tongue.

-If you ignore it...why do you? - i would only ignore it if the Dominant has made it clear my care in that regard was unecessary.

Thank you for this very well thought out post..I agree with it one hundred percent...it is a two way street of respect and caring.

 

[Shadowsdream]

"Your breath is stank. Go brush."

~~grin~~ works for Me!
double standards...the touch of humiliation but with a smile of acceptance.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: polite submissives!

I don't see this as D/s, but as natural grace.

I generally offer a mint.

You are correct..it should not be a specifically D/s issue...but unfortunately some submissives do feel that they are expected to treat the Dominants in some kind of godly way. Which does not work when it comes to hygiene.

 

[Shadowsdream]

I would feel that I was being disrespectful if I did not point it out to my Sir. He presents himself very well, and I would always want him at his best. He would have no problem with my bringing the subject up, but I would only do so in private.

Also, I would be more than happy for him to inform me of a similar situation of my own.

It is the manner of respect and privacy that can turn embarrassment to appreciation...I see that you recognize that completely.

 

[Shadowsdream]

for starters, i can usually tell when my breath stinks. but if He wants my mouth extra-fresh, He never hesitates to tell me to go brush. as for the "should" aspect of dom/mes telling their subs they've got funky breath, i think that a sub is a representation of the care their dom/me gives them, and having a nice fresh smile is a part of this. so yes, the dom/me should keep their sub in tip-top condition.

I like your way of thinking...it tells Me that you have tasted the reality of a D/s relationship of mutual respect and affection.

 

[Shadowsdream]

After Mistress found out I carried those little bottles of concentrated breath drops (the ones that burn a hole in your tongue), when going out, it was part of my regular carry. Depending on what I would be wearing (if anything) it may stay with me or end up with her.

Never having had to actually bring this up before (she was very much aware of herself) I'm not quite sure how I would approach it. Hygene was very much an importance in the house and mouth cleanlyness was a must.

In clubs, stale cig smoke in the air pretty much made you want to have mints in your mouth at all times. Wish I remembered eye drops though.

~~smile~~ it is nice to have a submissive that carries breath fresheners..they take up so much room in the toy bag!

 

[Shadowsdream]

I have gum, breath drops, lozenges, or something on me at all times.. I'm breath-phobic. My Dom/me would know that Im breath-phobic, and would probably learn to accomodate that (as a form of courtesy, if nothing else), but if not, I would simply suggest a mint. Just suggest one. From my knees, looking up at Him/Her.

Sometimes One does not notice their own bad breath...no bad taste in the mouth can be an illusion to thinking all is well.
I think your suggestion is incredibly beautiful and I would accept that mint just from the joy of you on your knees presenting it.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: polite submissives!

Yes, I would point it out as I know She wouldn't have bad breath intentionally for the meeting, and withholding info is a no-no lol. It would be particularly easy to tell Her in this situation, as I wouldn't be saying You have bad breath for my own benefit, but Hers. I'd probably say something like "oh, don't forget to check Your breath, Mistress.".

your response is delicate yet would cause a moment of reflection..respectful yet shows there COULD be a monster lurking in the mouth...

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: polite submissives!

I believe I would point it out - but probably by blaming myself, possibly asking if I might go and brush my teeth again or something.

This is really quite a difficult question really. However, the submissive would know her Mistress and would know the best approach to use.

As for why? I would point it out because I know She would want to be at Her very best in all situations.

O no ya don't!
~~grin~~
brushing your own teeth would not let Her know Her breath is like the back end of a skunk!
waiting patiently for a more direct approach from pussy girl!
ya just knew I would didn't ya?

 

[Shadowsdream]

i always carry around a tin of Altoids (wintergreen most of the time) and just offer them around. He knows me well enough to take it as a hint.

Once We know Our subs and their ways it becomes very easy to read these understatements as you so aptly point out...as strange as it may seem to many..it is these small details in a long term relationship that add smoothness and ease to the most delicate situations.

 

[Shadowsdream]

I always carry those little breath strips and always offer them to Him whether He needs them or not.

I give Him one first, placing it in His mouth and then I take one...

It actually has nothing to do with bad breath. I am just phobic about my breath from when I smoked and have not gotten over yet...

I see no need to tell Him He has bad breath. I wouldn't like it much if He told me that..,

O O!

 

[James G 5]

Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

You are correct..it should not be a specifically D/s issue...but unfortunately some submissives do feel that they are expected to treat the Dominants in some kind of godly way. Which does not work when it comes to hygiene.

Not to mention I really want to know if my fly is undone or there's TP hanging from my bots before we walk in a club or play party too

Being Dominant doesn't make me PERFECT
Even if I wanted a sub to treat me as such she could STILL find polite ways to point out an occasional foible
After all, God even had a few "oopsies".....how else do you explain the Duck-Billed Platypus?

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

Not to mention I really want to know if my fly is undone or there's TP hanging from my bots before we walk in a club or play party too

Being Dominant doesn't make me PERFECT
Even if I wanted a sub to treat me as such she could STILL find polite ways to point out an occasional foible
After all, God even had a few "oopsies".....how else do you explain the Duck-Billed Platypus?

..exactly!
I was doing the double subbie dance, twirling their leashes above My head as I used them for My own brand of a jive session...of course I was so much into the control of these 6' 4" creatures that I didn't notice the laces on My corset were lossening to a very dangerous state!
If it had not been for an observant submissive who cared enough about My honor I would have soon been naked from the waist up!
I would have had to change the toy boys roles from My piroette (sp?) extensions to My body armor!
....hmmm I was wondering the same thing about the Platypus! Ha ha ha!

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

..exactly!
I was doing the double subbie dance, twirling their leashes above My head as I used them for My own brand of a jive session...of course I was so much into the control of these 6' 4" creatures that I didn't notice the laces on My corset were lossening to a very dangerous state!
If it had not been for an observant submissive who cared enough about My honor I would have soon been naked from the waist up!
I would have had to change the toy boys roles from My piroette (sp?) extensions to My body armor!
....hmmm I was wondering the same thing about the Platypus! Ha ha ha!

I am getting a vivid picture of you dancing with slave and sub and it is making me smile!

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

I am getting a vivid picture of you dancing with slave and sub and it is making me smile!

It is always fun to do the two step ~~grin~~

 

[lark sparrow]

Active versus passive

your response is delicate yet would cause a moment of reflection..respectful yet shows there COULD be a monster lurking in the mouth...

Right -- the long answer, which I skipped, being -- if She were at home or a hotel room, the most effective thing might be brushing Her teeth, which She does for Herself. No need for my help beyond mentioning checking breath.

I love doing things for Her, but at times it's more helpful to check in some subtle way to see if She would even appreciate help and in what way - sometimes it's better to be passive so She can execute Her own plan. She might want me to gather some papers or Her coat or straighten the meeting room, while She takes care of Her breath.

If She were rushed and running out the door, I would simply offer the breath mint. I try to anticipate Her needs and "look out for Her", but also try to make sure I am not falling all over myself to help Her and simply getting in Her way. In other words, supplying the information, but not the plan - unless She wants my input on what to do.

And yes, I would definitely appreciate Her telling me if my breath was bad also!

 

[WillowPuss]

Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

O no ya don't!
~~grin~~
brushing your own teeth would not let Her know Her breath is like the back end of a skunk!
waiting patiently for a more direct approach from pussy girl!
ya just knew I would didn't ya?

I rather thought you might ... but wondered if I might get away with a part answer!

Ummmmm ... OK

I think I would probably kneel at Her feet and ask if I might speak. Then say something like "Please, Mistress. I think it might be an idea if you were to try that new breath freshener before Your meeting. I fear I detect a trace of lunch on your breath. May I go and prepare some for You."

And then take partial blame for preparing something for lunch that may have been the cause ...

*gulp*

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Active versus passive

Right -- the long answer, which I skipped, being -- if She were at home or a hotel room, the most effective thing might be brushing Her teeth, which She does for Herself. No need for my help beyond mentioning checking breath.

I love doing things for Her, but at times it's more helpful to check in some subtle way to see if She would even appreciate help and in what way - sometimes it's better to be passive so She can execute Her own plan. She might want me to gather some papers or Her coat or straighten the meeting room, while She takes care of Her breath.

If She were rushed and running out the door, I would simply offer the breath mint. I try to anticipate Her needs and "look out for Her", but also try to make sure I am not falling all over myself to help Her and simply getting in Her way. In other words, supplying the information, but not the plan - unless She wants my input on what to do.

And yes, I would definitely appreciate Her telling me if my breath was bad also!

Thank you for this longer response...it is a balance that is appreciated...watching out for the areas where your assistance is useful without stepping inside of Her Domme space..which can be just damn annoying!

 

[s'lara]

Creating a God

This thread made me think of something. How dangerous is it to deify the Dominant? They are by no means perfect and reality shows that from day to day. But i do know submissive's who think their Dominant is infallible. Is that kind of ... not sure how to put it ... steadfast loyalty dangerous?

Would like to know how O/others feel about it.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: Re: Re: polite submissives!

I rather thought you might ... but wondered if I might get away with a part answer!

Ummmmm ... OK

I think I would probably kneel at Her feet and ask if I might speak. Then say something like "Please, Mistress. I think it might be an idea if you were to try that new breath freshener before Your meeting. I fear I detect a trace of lunch on your breath. May I go and prepare some for You."

And then take partial blame for preparing something for lunch that may have been the cause ...

*gulp*

Thats much better pussy!
Of course you would be correct..it would be your fault! It is always the subs fault! Owning up to it and rectifying it is always a good thing!
~~grin~~ but seriously the honesty so respectfully given does indicate a genuine concern for the Dominant.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Creating a God

This thread made me think of something. How dangerous is it to deify the Dominant? They are by no means perfect and reality shows that from day to day. But i do know submissive's who think their Dominant is infallible. Is that kind of ... not sure how to put it ... steadfast loyalty dangerous?

Would like to know how O/others feel about it.

I would have to say a bit of naive self dishonesty. Recognizing that no one in the world is perfect is simply common sense. Loyalty has little to do with reality when it is an excuse for denial...if you know what I mean!

 

[s'lara]

Re: Re: Creating a God

I would have to say a bit of naive self dishonesty. Recognizing that no one in the world is perfect is simply common sense. Loyalty has little to do with reality when it is an excuse for denial...if you know what I mean!

i certainly do. Choosing to glaze over the imperfections is about self-delusion, not loyalty. Is that what You were saying?

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: Re: Creating a God

i certainly do. Choosing to glaze over the imperfections is about self-delusion, not loyalty. Is that what You were saying?

Yes it is what I am saying and I also find it disrespectful...as it can create a feeling in a Dominant that they must strive for perfection 24/7 which is beyond even the scope of the Pope! Making such a statement about Your Dominant can also make others look down on them if the others think the Dominant believes it themselves.
It is an insiduos dishonesty.