Pretty please, play with me.

[WickedEve]

Men are so cute when they're frightened. What? You're not frightened? Oh, you will be.

*all the weird mind wired broads get together and make plans to have sushi for dinner*

 

[Rybka]

Hey, I Don't Worry

I still smell fresher than you do!


Regards, Rybka

 

[WickedEve]

Excuse me, but I smell good! I do not smell fishy! I smell like rose buds dipped in honey! And taste just as sweet!

(if I caught you, I wouldn't throw you back. I'd beat you on a rock, gut you, and fry you.)

 

[Rybka]

That is why you can't catch me!

I am the most beautiful of fish. I am lovely and svelte and smell better than any "tuna boat-shit house door human females"!

Regards, Ryba

 

[WickedEve]

Rybka, my dear fishstick, I have a feeling that no women are going to want to catch you. You're perfectly safe.
Okay, pull the nets in, hooks out of the water. This guppy is too teeny weeny.

 

[REDWAVE]

Sniff test

Well, gals, I'd be willing to volunteer to help settle this for you, and give you both a smell test. . .


Then again, maybe you could get Furry to perform the honors . . .

 

[Elda Furry]

Re: Sniff test

Well, gals, I'd be willing to volunteer to help settle this for you, and give you both a smell test. . .


Then again, maybe you could get Furry to perform the honors . . .

Sniffffffffffff... All I can smell is Rybka.

Furry

 

[WickedEve]

If all you fishies have finished stinkin' up my thread, then let's get back to poetry business!

Elda, salmon panties, you know you've had your fishy moments.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Good evening, poets

Yes, another job well done. Congratulations all around.

Nice going Angie: I've been telling you for weeks to drop by and write a stanza or two and when you finally decide to do it, it's on an already closed poem!

I know you'll set us up with something great.

And Rybka, I don't remember needing a second try, you little fishy thing! I only got wrong syllable count because of flawed dictionaries!

 

[WickedEve]

ANGELINE!

Aren't you next?

 

[Angeline]

It's Triolet Time!

By God you're right Eve! It is my turn. And I've procrastinated, I know, although I would like to say in my defense that I have two children starting school on Wednesday. How Gap Kids can charge 22 bucks for a teeny little pair of blue jeans is beyond me, and I don't care how many kids' mothers are letting their children buy shoes with retractable roller skates, I think plain old Keds are just fine, thank you very much!

Oh. You're not my kids? I'm not at the mall anymore? (Putting steaming credit card away.) Oh you're grownups? This is the Pretty Please thread?

OK. Lemme just um take this Prozac and ...... (Eve, go back and reread. This is your future.)

Smiling brightly. Hi.

After various requests for something "fun and easy" for this iteration of "the game," I came up with the triolet. (And speaking as the person who not only posted too late on the last one, but also couldn't get all the rules straight after various tries--and thanks for pointing that out, Rybka--this looks fun.)

Triolet

If you're unfamiliar with the form, it comes from the French courtly tradition (circa 13th c.) and is similar to the Rondeau (think "row, row, row your boat"). Triolets are generally light-hearted, even whimsical, but don't have to be.

The triolet has 8 lines, but because there are some repetitions, you actually end up writing 5 unique lines. I have made an executive decision not to require a specific meter, but lines should be of similar length (no wild variences, please).

Here's how it works:

Rhyme Scheme: ABAAABAB

Line 1 begins with an observation
A I didn’t get this done on time

Line 2 builds on it
B And poor Eve had to chase me down

Line 3 continues the explication and rhymes with line 1
A And make me focus, choose a rhyme

Line 4 is a repeat of line 1
A I didn’t get this done on time

Line 5 introduces a new idea and rhymes with line 1
A Tis true that I commit no crime

Line 6 builds on the idea in line five and rhymes with line 2
B But playing the evasive clown

Line 7 is a repeat of line 1
A I didn’t get this done on time

Line 8 is a repeat of line 2
B And poor Eve had to chase me down

Thus we get the immortal procrastination triolet

Angeline's Regret

I didn’t get this done on time
And poor Eve had to chase me down
And make me focus, choose a rhyme
I didn’t get this done on time
Tis true that I commit no crime
But playing the evasive clown
I didn’t get this done on time
And poor Eve had to chase me down

Kinda fun, huh?

Now, how do we make this more interesting for a group poem? We shall make this a story. A mystery! Eve, this one's for you. You give a lot. (And when you see how I thank you, you may never ask me to do this again!)

I shall begin. This ends when it ends. Let's have fun and see how creative we can be!


The Purloined Playmate (or Eve's Stolen Dildo)

Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong
Who lives sequestered by the bed
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
When powered up when glowing red
Abuzz he whirs lidbido's song
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong


(Eve, I really hope your sense of humor is as good as I think it is!)

 

[dizzy]

....

 

[TheDR4KE]

The Purloined Playmate (or Eve's Stolen Dildo)

Angeline
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong
Who lives sequestered by the bed
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
When powered up when glowing red
Abuzz he whirs libido's song
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong

TheDR4KE
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo,
who took the treasure Eve had to give
and left her asleep, her head on the pillow.
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
An open window; the curtains billow;
our darling was visited by a thief!
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
Who took the treasure Eve had to give?

 

[Angeline]

The momentum begins!

DR4KE, high five!

(Thank god I'm not alone in this anymore!)

 

[TheDR4KE]

Re: The momentum begins!

DR4KE, high five!

(Thank god I'm not alone in this anymore!)

That was fun. I love forms with repeated lines -- it lets you play with meanings.

A poem about wicked's dildo -- will we see Red contribute even though it's not free verse?

Quack

the D (who can't wait for the next stanza in this mystery to come out)

 

[WickedEve]

Eeeeeee... hee hee hee hee hee hee hee...

I knew if I talked about dildos long enough you people would finally not be able to resist dildo poetry!

Oh, I just got out of bed. I need pepsi or something. I'll soon be back to write. And I'm bringing my dildo with me... for inspiration only, of course.

 

[WickedEve]

The Purloined Playmate (or Eve's Stolen Dildo)

Angeline
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong
Who lives sequestered by the bed
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
When powered up when glowing red
Abuzz he whirs libido's song
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong

TheDR4KE
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo,
who took the treasure Eve had to give
and left her asleep, her head on the pillow.
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
An open window; the curtains billow;
our darling was visited by a thief!
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
Who took the treasure Eve had to give?

Wicked Eve
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers -
feminine hands is my belief.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief
looking for D battery relief -
Eve unaware as vibration lingers.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

I knew Angie would come up with something great!

I won't be able to write a thing before Sep11th -- RL is keeping me too busy, I shouldn't even be here right now -- but I can't wait to find out who kiddnapped Rowdy Ted and for what porpose!

 

[_Land]

The Purloined Playmate (or Eve's Stolen Dildo)

Angeline
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong
Who lives sequestered by the bed
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
When powered up when glowing red
Abuzz he whirs libido's song
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong

TheDR4KE
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo,
who took the treasure Eve had to give
and left her asleep, her head on the pillow.
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
An open window; the curtains billow;
our darling was visited by a thief!
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
Who took the treasure Eve had to give?

Wicked Eve
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers -
feminine hands is my belief.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief
looking for D battery relief.
Eve unaware as vibration lingers.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers.

Twas Fourteen inches Long
more then three inches around
No wonder someone stole the Dong
Tis no wonder why we sing this Song
Twas Fourteen inches Long
It length and girth astound
Tis no wonder why we sing this Song
It length and girth astound

 

[Angeline]

One never knows

my dear lauren. But I would think the purpose would be clear. lol

Eve? Are you enjoying this? If only I'd realized you'd been plotting for months to get some unsuspecting dupe to have us writing dildo poetry (it sounds like cowboy poetry lol). You really are wicked, aren't you?

 

[_Land]

Re: One never knows

my dear lauren. But I would think the purpose would be clear. lol

Eve? Are you enjoyong this? If only I'd realized you'd been plotting for months to get some unsuspecting dupe to have us writing dildo poetry (it sounds like cowboy poetry lol). You really are wicked, aren't you?

Well, i didnt steal it, the thought of 14 inches more then three inches round gives me night mares, perhaps Rybka took it to use as an agitator for his tank...................

 

[WickedEve]

Re: One never knows

my dear lauren. But I would think the purpose would be clear. lol

Eve? Are you enjoyong this? If only I'd realized you'd been plotting for months to get some unsuspecting dupe to have us writing dildo poetry (it sounds like cowboy poetry lol). You really are wicked, aren't you?

No, I'm not wicked. I'm really not. All I did was bombard you poets with subliminal messages about dildo poetry. Is it my fault that you're susceptible to it?

 

[dizzy]

The New Guy

The Purloined Playmate (or Eve's Stolen Dildo)

Angeline
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong
Who lives sequestered by the bed
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
When powered up when glowing red
Abuzz he whirs libido's song
Eve's dildo is named Rowdy Ted
Her favored "boy" so thick so strong

TheDR4KE
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo,
who took the treasure Eve had to give
and left her asleep, her head on the pillow.
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
An open window; the curtains billow;
our darling was visited by a thief!
Rowdy Ted was a Wicked dildo.
Who took the treasure Eve had to give?

Wicked Eve
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers -
feminine hands is my belief.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief
looking for D battery relief -
Eve unaware as vibration lingers.
Rowdy Ted was taken by a thief,
snatched by nimble little fingers.

_Land
Twas Fourteen inches Long
more then three inches around
No wonder someone stole the Dong
Tis no wonder why we sing this Song
Twas Fourteen inches Long
It length and girth astound
Tis no wonder why we sing this Song
It length and girth astound


I know I'm new here but I want to play so I humbly submit my stanza to this hilarious poem. If you find my stanza lacking by all means take it out and accept somebody elses (with no hard feelings from me).

Dizzy

Dizzy
Rowdy Ted is cheating,
In and out the thiefs delight
He really should be weeping.
Rowdy Ted is cheating,
Thoughts of Eve are fleeting,
Angeline enjoys her plight
Rowdy Ted is cheating,
In and out the thiefs delight.

 

[Rybka]

Did I get it right?

Rybka

Who stole Ted the rowdy dildo?
Who is our Wicked Nemesis,
Perhaps a hobbit named Bilbo?
Who stole Ted the rowdy dildo?
Who knows how far this thief will go,
A new trilogy genesis?
Who stole Ted the rowdy dildo?
Who is our Wicked Nemesis?

Well, i didnt steal it, the thought of 14 inches more then three inches round gives me night mares, perhaps Rybka took it to use as an agitator for his tank...................

If an agitator is involved you'd better ask S.J. and Blarneystoned!!


Regards, Rybka

 

[Angeline]

Dear Land and Dizzy

See now herein lies the danger in this sort of thing.

Land?

I can only speak for myself here, but there is such a thing as
TOO big, you know.

Dizzy?

Welcome! We're glad you're here. But umm did your triolet have to be about me? It's not like I'm Wicked or anything like that.

And didn't you hear about the rule where the person who starts the challenge isn't in the poem? No? Ok, then I must have made it up.

Goodguy?

Help!!
__________________________________
And now to redeem myself:

My lord it's big as a baleen!
Whispered softly to herself
Transfixed was honest Angeline
My lord it's big as a baleen!
He'll not serve the Wicked queen
Await her, lonely, on some shelf
My lord it's big as a baleen!
Whispered softly to herself