Problems with heterosexual pornography; a rant

[infinity706]

because when men get slapped around etc by other men, the message is not that women are sluts.

Because it's men, see?

This lets women take a step away from that ever-present "S" word.

Haven't we been through all of this before? It seems kinda 101-ish to me.

So, basically the entire difference is that the whole thing about porn objectifying women is 100% sexist bullshit? Afterall, it's not even just men doing the violence. There's plenty of female domination out there, too.

 

[Very_Bad_Man]

That's because most porn is produced by men. Try some of the newer porn companies that are owned/ran by women and made for women. (And, no, I'm not saying lesbian porn. There are female directors who conduct hetero porn.)

Yup you are right. The female directed porn usually is much more romantic and great for couples to watch.

I fully endorse her statement

 

[justherhusband]

Yup you are right. The female directed porn usually is much more romantic and great for couples to watch.

I fully endorse her statement

I don't think the straight stuff produced or directed by women is any better at all. I's different, but not any better. The lesbian porn made by women is much better than anything made by men, but that's about it.

 

[Stella_Omega]

So, basically the entire difference is that the whole thing about porn objectifying women is 100% sexist bullshit? Afterall, it's not even just men doing the violence. There's plenty of female domination out there, too.

I know you're smarter than this. I've seen you be smarter than this.

 

[miss_emiii]

its probably been mentioned, but i also HATE the lack of attractive men in porn. I mean there are definitely some lookers, but not to the quality of the female performers.
I can't say how much I hate having a promising video load, only to find out the male counterpart looks homeless.

 

[Stella_Omega]

its probably been mentioned, but i also HATE the lack of attractive men in porn. I mean there are definitely some lookers, but not to the quality of the female performers.
I can't say how much I hate having a promising video load, only to find out the male counterpart looks homeless.

yes, Miss emiii it has-- but it could stand to be repeated a few more times. Some time, some day, somebody might actually hear it.

 

[sunandshadow]

I wonder if part of the issue with lack of attractive men in porn is that there's less agreement about what makes men attractive than what makes women attractive? I mean, I've looked at gay porn and beefcake photography, stuff made by men attracted to men. For the most part I still don't think the actors are attractive because they're not my type. I'm sure they're attractive to some segment of the population, but they're usually that "compact, muscled all over from gym work, buzzed hair" look. Guys that look like lightweight wrestlers. That's not really my thing at all.

 

[Texguy84]

I wonder if part of the issue with lack of attractive men in porn is that there's less agreement about what makes men attractive than what makes women attractive? I mean, I've looked at gay porn and beefcake photography, stuff made by men attracted to men. For the most part I still don't think the actors are attractive because they're not my type. I'm sure they're attractive to some segment of the population, but they're usually that "compact, muscled all over from gym work, buzzed hair" look. Guys that look like lightweight wrestlers. That's not really my thing at all.

Incidentally, also a pretty fair description for a lot of folks in the military, from what I've noticed. Though there are also the bigger guys, and those with the ferocious "Teddy Bear Physique" like myself.

I think more likely the issue is that there isn't really a consensus of what a "Good Looking Man" looks like. For better or for worse, there just isn't as much social image focus that I've noticed on any particular "look" for guys. Mostly Society just wants us to obsess over the size of our wedding tackle and how "badass" we can act.

 

[miss_emiii]

Ill agree with you here, because I kinda go for the average guy. I don't care for the beefcakes or the twinks, but the cute boy next door that takes care of himself. Gay porn at least (somewhat) has attractive FACED men. They tend to have a fuller range of men (and a large qty of men in all those categories), nerd, twink, slightly athletic, guy next door, bodybuilder, hairy, everything.

Thats why i watch gay porn just as much as straight. Even if the guys arent necessarily my type, they arent some fug pulled in from the street.

 

[sunandshadow]

I think more likely the issue is that there isn't really a consensus of what a "Good Looking Man" looks like.

Thought that was what I said? lol I said "less agreement about what makes men attractive". lack of agreement = no consensus

Me, I'd like to see porn with guys who look like david bowie and johnny depp and some of the more attractive members of 80s hair bands. Clean-shaven, long hair or a movie-quality wig, preferably an outlandish costume for them to get stripped out of.

 

[MadameVoyeur]

I would like to start off by saying that I am a HUGE porn enthusiast. I think porn has great potential in the liberation of sexuality and promoting acceptance and understanding between different sexual demographics--and it's a non-productive, fun distraction This being said, I think porn is just like anything else that exists; it's 90% shit.

I find that most of the hetero pornography I come across suffers from a few crippling symptoms that really keeps me from sinking my teeth in.

1) a huge lack of POV porn from a woman's perspective. Granted, I'm sure these videos exist, but how come it feels like the porn industry left out 50% of human consciousness?

2) the objectification of the male body. I always feel like the men in these videos tend to be nothing but silent penises thrusting into a screaming body. Aren't men MORE than penises? Aren't there other erogenous zones? And, don't we care if they are enjoying themselves or not? We can't even see their faces!!

3) all hetero porn tends to end with the male orgasm; my question is: why? If the woman was five seconds before writhing on the bed about to finish and the man beats her, the video is over. Why doesn't he finish her, or she finish herself?! It doesn't make any sense.

4) why doesn't anyone laugh in porn? This may seem silly to everyone else, but sex is first and foremost a blast. I feel like if an alien visited our planet and watched all of our porn, he would never know sex was something people thought of as fun. Don't get me wrong, angry or serious sex is HOT... but, whatever happened to, 'let's play put my penis in your vagina'?

**I am not by any means saying that my four 'issues' don't have their place, or cannot be sexy. What I am saying is I'd like some variation in my hetero porn---and I'd like it yesterday!

Am I the only who feels sexually frustrated by bad porn? Am I just crazy?
Help a bitch out.

Hearin' ya, Willowed....I share the same lament..

 

[FarmerTan]

its probably been mentioned, but i also HATE the lack of attractive men in porn..

I wonder if part of the issue with lack of attractive men in porn is that there's less agreement about what makes men attractive than what makes women attractive? .

A couple thoughts on this:

1. Like alot of folks have said here before, most porn is geared towards men and made by men. In alot of porn, especially the internet stuff, the actor is also the cameraman/director/producer. In that gonzo/first person perspective the woman is being filmed giving head by the same guy she's giving head to. That guy doesn't care terribly much about his appearance as long as he's making money and getting off and the guys watching it are more focused on the woman anyway.

2. The other reason there is a dearth of good looking guys in porn is the lack of wood in the lumberyard. I think this is the biggest reason for the porn industry's lack of handsome actors. You have a guy show up on a porn set, wanting to make money fucking sexy women, then the director calls "Action!" and it hits the guy that there is a camera recording him for posterity, a dozen or so people off camera are just staring at him blankly, it's either too hot or too cold, and you may not even really like the woman you're set to screw in this scene. And things go limp.

I've read articles in one or two different porno mags about the porn scene and they've said the same thing: Directors trying to make a profit off porn care far more about ability to perform than physical looks.

Ron Jeremy and Co. may be fat, hairy bastards, but they can get it up and keep it up on cue.

 

[Controcorrente]

PS: here are two complimentary links

http://www.makelovenotporn.com/

http://fleshbot.com/#!5147160/real-sex-vs-porn-sex-the-battle-rages-on

Very hilarious.

This idea of "Porn World" versus "Real World" brings up some interesting questions, namely, why are so many of us led to believe that we must emulate porn to feel sexually fulfilled? One way to look at this is to understand that porn is an industry, and in the same way that Hollywood films capture an elevated, stylized portrayal of life in general, a good deal of non-amateur porn looks to do the same with sex. In either case, we are intrigued and titillated by a reality that's foreign to us, whether it's an action hero gunning down hordes of henchman or a porn actor getting showered with the ejaculate of hordes of men.

It should be no surprise that we don't all necessarily want to participate in the sexual acts we like to watch, in the same way that most movie-goers wouldn't like to find themselves in the middle of a high-octane action plot; however, it does make sense to say that we like to relate on some level to the actors/characters and scenarios we choose to watch. So while I may not actually enjoy being on the receiving end of a bukkake scene, I may like feeling submissive on a different level or I may entertain the idea of experimenting with more than one partner (but not hordes). Anyway, it should be made clear that studio porn aims at depicting an augmented reality that appeals to the fantasies of many but the actual desires of few. In the end, like the Hollywood machine, it's a money-makin' business that caters to peoples' capacity for imagination and tendency toward escapism.

The problem with mainstream porn is inherent in its name--it attempts to define a 'mainstream' or base-line category of sex that doesn't actually exist. Depending on your definition of sex and personal tastes, any of a number of really commonplace practices in porn--oral sex, anal penetration, even vaginal penetration--could be considered kinks, yet because we're told these are 'normal,' we are often robbed of pleasure (and the discovery of our own kinks) in the pursuit of a form of sex that may look enticing but whose focus is displaying bodies and genitals, not maximizing pleasure. (I'll never forget an interview with Tera Patrick where she proudly admitted she much preferred missionary with her husband with the lights out to kneeling in the gravel outside giving head to an essential stranger.)

The real shame here is that, caught up in the contorted, bleached, dissociative fantasy world that a lot of porn promises us (which is totally fine if that actually is your bag), we fail to discover our true sexuality, that which fulfills us on the most basic level and lets our own fantasies take root. (Thank god amateur porn exists as a sobering, but still exceedingly sexy, reminder of what it's really all about.)

 

[Stella_Omega]

Ron Jeremy and Co. may be fat, hairy bastards, but they can get it up and keep it up on cue.

One woman producer has solved that problem... give the actors time on the set to get used to the situation.

Of course that costs extra money.

 

[FarmerTan]

Of course that costs extra money.

Indeed. And according to the porn studios, they're hemorrhaging money thanks to internet competition. Or so they say.

 

[WillowedCabin]

Porn bloopers:

http://www.tube8.com/hardcore/porn-bloopers/80460/

Enjoy.

 

[WillowedCabin]

Found a really awesome link

to some Swedish Fem Porn that is coming soon; enjoy.

http://www.dirtydiaries.se/

**PS: I think it also struggles with the art vs. porn debate

 

[teknight]

Women won't buy what's on offer. But producing stuff of a quality women would buy would be a lot more expensive than producing what's on offer. The increased expense of higher-quality erotic movies would probably limit the number of people willing to buy them. I hate that it is this way, because I'd really love to see erotic versions of some of my favorite fantasy movies and Shakespearean interpretations which have gorgeous costumes and good acting. But an erotic movie which had a budget comparable to one of the lord of the rings movies or twilight movies or harry potter movies wouldn't be able to recoup that budget and a profit in sales no matter how well-written, beautifully acted, and all-around gorgeous the resulting erotic movie was.

But a good story doesn't require money, in and of itself. Granted, if you wanna make "Lord of the orifices" and not have it come out cheesy (horrible images there) you're gonna require a big budget, but, reimagining any story and giving it a modern setting, while more expensive than a mainstream film" shouldn't cost that much money (ok, fine, there's the script expenditure...and then there's the bias that says porn performers can't act....Damn it, I'm shooting down my own points ).

 

[silver_eyes]

One woman producer has solved that problem... give the actors time on the set to get used to the situation.

Of course that costs extra money.

How about this.....
You're the director, tell them we need 2 sixty nines, a pussy eating scene, and an anal sex scene. Do it the way you feel it.

PS Stella, pencil in a true van dyke, it would look a hell of a lot better than a goatee and mustache!

 

[Stella_Omega]

How about this.....
You're the director, tell them we need 2 sixty nines, a pussy eating scene, and an anal sex scene. Do it the way you feel it.

PS Stella, pencil in a true van dyke, it would look a hell of a lot better than a goatee and mustache!

Hmm, ya think? *looks in the mirror*


ODDDLY ENOUGH, i just got into it in another place with a porn maker. The moderator deleted the thread, though, so i can't link anyone to it.

I had posted a link to a snippet which showed some all woman action of a type I have never seen-- just the wildest, rowdiest, gangbang-in-a-bar that happened to be nothing but women. Gangbanging a woman, and each other on the side. It's kind of awesome energy.

So, I posted this link, and not.
One.
Woman shows up in the thread.

But a few men do, to tell me that the site is full of malware, (i didn't get any myself) and then up pops one of the Big names incommercail-- and Seriously, very good-- porn to yell at me about enabling piracy.

I asked him what he had in his catalog that I could buy, given my especial tastes.

He offered me ONE scene in a dvd of boy-girl BDSM (meaning Mdom of course) and a how-to-be-bi DVD (which I have, it's incredible)

He gave me the names of sweetheart and girlfriend films, and Abby Winter.

He told me that he didn't know about my special tastes since his principles forbade him to click on the link.

I replied that it's difficult to dialogue under those conditions and that I could not buy what wasn't for sale.

I said that I didn't want to pay for a whole DVD of stuff that i don't want for the sake of five minutes of authentic crumbs (been there done that, lord knows)I said that long eyelashes, silicone tits and three inch nails make me a little nauseus and that was what i was seeing on the covers of his DVDs. (this might have been impetuous of me, but fuck) i said that this sort of look only makes me even more aware that the starlets are performing for MEN, not for one butch dyke.

And that, if he wanted to produce for my eentsy demographic, i would offer my services-- a middle aged dyke with a spreading tummy and a big heart.

i got back a message that I had INSULTED HIM AND HE WOULD NEVER HIRE SOMEONE WHO INSULTED HIM. THAT VID SOLD 50,000 AND COUNTING copies, SO WHAT DID I KNOW.

I said pull the other one, he won't hire me because my face on his DVD covers won't sell 50,000 copies and we both know it.

And then the moderator got worried that I was antagonising someone far more important than I am in the capitalist scheme of things-- and deleted the whole thing, because not every place is lit.

I'll sanitise my spiel and blog it, I guess.

 

[WillowedCabin]

Hmm, ya think? *looks in the mirror*


ODDDLY ENOUGH, i just got into it in another place with a porn maker. The moderator deleted the thread, though, so i can't link anyone to it.

I had posted a link to a snippet which showed some all woman action of a type I have never seen-- just the wildest, rowdiest, gangbang-in-a-bar that happened to be nothing but women. Gangbanging a woman, and each other on the side. It's kind of awesome energy.

So, I posted this link, and not.
One.
Woman shows up in the thread.

But a few men do, to tell me that the site is full of malware, (i didn't get any myself) and then up pops one of the Big names incommercail-- and Seriously, very good-- porn to yell at me about enabling piracy.

I asked him what he had in his catalog that I could buy, given my especial tastes.

He offered me ONE scene in a dvd of boy-girl BDSM (meaning Mdom of course) and a how-to-be-bi DVD (which I have, it's incredible)

He gave me the names of sweetheart and girlfriend films, and Abby Winter.

He told me that he didn't know about my special tastes since his principles forbade him to click on the link.

I replied that it's difficult to dialogue under those conditions and that I could not buy what wasn't for sale.

I said that I didn't want to pay for a whole DVD of stuff that i don't want for the sake of five minutes of authentic crumbs (been there done that, lord knows)I said that long eyelashes, silicone tits and three inch nails make me a little nauseus and that was what i was seeing on the covers of his DVDs. (this might have been impetuous of me, but fuck) i said that this sort of look only makes me even more aware that the starlets are performing for MEN, not for one butch dyke.

And that, if he wanted to produce for my eentsy demographic, i would offer my services-- a middle aged dyke with a spreading tummy and a big heart.

i got back a message that I had INSULTED HIM AND HE WOULD NEVER HIRE SOMEONE WHO INSULTED HIM. THAT VID SOLD 50,000 AND COUNTING copies, SO WHAT DID I KNOW.

I said pull the other one, he won't hire me because my face on his DVD covers won't sell 50,000 copies and we both know it.

And then the moderator got worried that I was antagonising someone far more important than I am in the capitalist scheme of things-- and deleted the whole thing, because not every place is lit.

I'll sanitise my spiel and blog it, I guess.

Stella, you rock; seriously, seriously rock.
And fuck what you heard--
sex, even with old dykes with love handles, can be HOT.
It's about what is going on between the two people and how that is captured.

I learned this lesson in watching Dirty Diaries (the 12 Swedish, feminist film shorts) --
I just finished, and re-watched some of the sex scenes maybe 5 times. They are incredible and the artistry is phenomenal. I have never been more turned on. What's interesting is how deep human sexuality is; for example, the things I thought would never turn me on, did.

Kahzing, what a ride!
This was porn I told my friends about and recommended to everyone.
Because even if it doesn't turn you on, it certainly has some interesting cultural/ sexual commentary going on.

 

[Very_Bad_Man]

The problem in porn is the lack of anything resembling acting or a credible story.

There is no real seduction. I think the seduction is one of the most exciting elements in a real life situation and I would like to see that on film.

 

[twister947]

Ah, but seduction takes place between the ears...there's nothing to "see."

 

[Stella_Omega]

Ah, but seduction takes place between the ears...there's nothing to "see."

You are the grief and despair of visual artists everywhere.



The real problem is that, since sex is so deeply devalued in our society, actors who have more than the barest modicum of talent/ambition are not going to risk their careers on porn.

 

[twister947]

You are the grief and despair of visual artists everywhere.

You are not the first to make this observation.