*sigh* I hate to say it, but sex is getting boring

[THEBRAT]

Alas tis so. I wouldn't know it's been three dry years for me and I'm bouncing off of the walls.

 

[Eve_of_destruction]

wetlands.com???

Samurai... just tried going to wetlands.com, and I doubt much if it would help our friends w/ their writers block. Unless an environmental website gets them hot, that is.

I don't know, maybe it's because I'm a newbie at the writing thing, but i just submitted my first story, and it's a 4 page fuck fest. One evening, 2 people, continuous sex... and I could have kept going and going like that damned Energizer bunny, but as everyone knows, all good things must "cum" to an end sometime!

 

[Guest]

sex IS boring!

KM, sex IS boring. The fun is always in the plot, the setting, the cast, the foreplay and the afterplay. Sex invariably boils (unintended pun!) down to in and out, up and down. We're all trying to make it more interesting than just that!

 

[Cockatoo]

"Boring, Ugly Hippy Shit"

Okay, you guys have got me thinking, now (and that's NEVER a good thing). Who was it that said "Sex is Boring, Ugly Hippie Shit"?

Was it Sid Viscious? Or Johnny Rotten? I know it was a 70's punk, and a serious one. I think it was Sid.

I disagree with him, though. It's fascinating, beautiful Hippy Shit.

 

[cymbidia]

I just love the way your mind works, Cockatoo.

"Sex is ugly, fucking boring hippie shit."
- Johnny Rotten


The movie "Sid & Nancy" was a cult classic, too. In it, Sid said "Sex is ugly, fucking boring hippie shit," until he found Nancy, who turned him on, sexually, and introduced him to heroine. Soon he was addicted to them both. Eventually... well, i guess i shouldn't give it away, just in case you don't know and want to see it.

Don'cha just love a happy ending?

 

[flawed_ethics]

Why not just leave them dangling?

I agree with what most of you post here, except my view is that not matter how much effort I put into writting my sex scenes (so to speak), it will likely end up on par with some jack-off's line "Take it up the cunt, you slut whore bitch..." Oh well. Can't win them all, I guess.

But why not make a story with all the staircase climbing, leading to where you'd expect them to have sex, and then cut it off and start the next scene after the commotion has died off (like the pair in bed, or the threesome sharing a cigar after what they did to neighbor's cat, whatever! )? If the foreplay was that good, the sex is just filler, really. And while you'll probably score lower votes ("I wanted to get off! What were you thinking?!"), I would like to think your fellow writers and seasoned erotica readers would understand and enjoy it just as much, and maybe appreciate it even more (of course, like all things, it would have to be done well...).

But enough ranting from a guy still waiting to post his own story.

 

[Cockatoo]

People with "C" names

cymbidia, Thank you honey! You know I'm sending that happy vibe right back atca, darlin.

flawed_ethics, the sex has just got to be there because it's just plain required. It's required by the readers, it's required by the genre of the site where we're posting, and finally, it's required by the dramatic situation.

Checkov (the playwright, not the guy on star trek) said something to the effect that "If you show the audience a gun in act one, it has to go off in act three." As you guys know, my paraphrasings are far from precise, and I neither speak russian nor study playwriting, so pardon me if I haven't gotten it quite right, but you get the gist of it.

When you post an erotic story to the internet, there'd better be sex in it. Otherwise, you'll fall flat. You're waving around a loaded gun and then putting it meekly away.

The Cohen brothers' early film "Blood Simple" has perhaps the most effective use of cinematic violence of any movie in the last twenty years. Tarrantino and Verhoven don't have anything on these fellahs. The movie starts with a gun being loaded. Six bullets. As a viewer, you KNOW it will go off. You don't know who will be holding it, or who will be shot at, or who gets out of the movie alive, but you spend the whole 90 minutes on the edge of your seat counting those shots, and you FEEL every single last one of them.

A good erotic drama will maintain that same kind of erotic tension. You KNOW there's gonna be sex. You don't know the particulars of it. You make guesses. You have hopes. You get into it. It will affect you.

A bad erotic story will let the sex fall flat. No matter how much fucking is in there, it doesn't work any better than the thousands of bullets that fly around in Schwartzenegger movies and hit nothing.

In short, it ain't the "what" or the "how much," it's all in the "how." If it's boring, then the "how" isn't working and you need to move it or change it or delete it or do something else until it does work.

That's it. IMHO.

cymbidia, Checkov, Cohen, and Cockatoo. This message has been brought to you by the letter "C" and by the number "4."

 

[Laurel]

Re: People with "C" names

flawed_ethics, the sex has just got to be there because it's just plain required. It's required by the readers, it's required by the genre of the site where we're posting, and finally, it's required by the dramatic situation.

Exactly. I've seen authors on other sites refer sneeringly to "the strokers" in their audience, as though stories which inspire sexual arousal are somehow less important, and readers which seek sexual arousal through sex stories are similarly less important.

This is EROTICA! It IS base. It IS viceral, instinctual. Just as the goal of a horror novel is to scare you, and the goal of a romance is to bring a bittersweet tear to your eye, the goal of erotica is to AROUSE THE READER. If you're so busy being clever that you forget the sexy bits, then you're failing as an erotic author. You may be succeeding at writing at good story, but it's still not erotica. Erotica is EROTIC.

A well-written tale will always be more effective. Edgar Allan Poe wrote effective horror. It's so well-written that it transcends the genre. But the key is that his stories are not only well-written but also SCARY. He never loses sight of the needs of his audience - to be scared.

Similarly, the most popular stories on the site tend not to be wham-bam-thank-ya-ma'ams - they're generally works with a good amount of pacing, character development, and plot. People crave these things in all fiction. But these stories also get the reader hard/wet. There may be stories on site that are technically more well-written, but these are often less erotic - less sensual, more intellectual. Readers who might otherwise enjoy these stories will be less open to them when what they're really in the mood for is something steamy, wet, & wild. And yes, some readers masturbate while reading the stories. If you as a writer find this distasteful, then perhap you'd be better off writing general fiction. Erotica, like horror, is not for the squeamish.

The readers who come to Literotica do so looking for sex - just like I watch a Jet Li movie looking for high-flying kicks, or a Akira Kurasawa film expecting amazing battle sequences. You can't write a horror story with no scary bits and expect a favorable response from your readers, and you can't write erotica without sex and expect great feedback. It's not erotica without sex, no matter how clever you are.

 

[Weird Harold]

Re: Re: People with "C" names

It's not erotica without sex, no matter how clever you are.

If you had said "it's not Porn without sex, I would agree with you.

However, there are some very erotic stories on this site where the sex is the least erotic thing about the story. (mostly in the exhibitionist and voyeur category.)

Erotica is more about sexual tension and anticipation than it is about the "old in-and-out." Details about the culimnation of all the buildup is nice, but not absolutely essential to Erotica; Details are everything in porn.

I'm not saying that SEX isn't required for erotica, just that details of the physical act aren't required if the story is well written. I don't recal the author or whether it is here at Lit or not, but there is a series of stories titled "The Apartment Window" that is very erotic and nobody ever touches anyone else.

 

[Laurel]

When I spoke of sex, I was referring to the feeling of arousal. As you suggested, in voyeur stories no actual sex can take place yet the stories can be very arousing nonetheless.

BUT that's the point - they ARE arousing. Erotica is meant to arouse. I think some authors poo-poo this aspect of it, like it's not important or that readers expecting to be aroused by erotic stories must be of lower intelligence or "lower class". As I said, writers who think this way - who feel that arousing stories are unimportant or sneer-worthy - should try another genre.

Just as a movie can be scary by merely suggesting rather than overtly depicting horrific scenes, passages within stories in which sex is implied can be VERY erotic. A chance glance at a woman's panties. A hungry look in a passing man's eye. But the sex HAS to be there - implied or overt - or it's not erotica. It may be wonderful fiction with wonderful characters and great pacing, but it has to be erotic to be erotica.

IMveryHO, the labels "porn" versus "erotica' are highly subjective. To some, all incest stories are "exploitative" and "pornographic", yet to others they can be legitimately called Erotica. It's all fiction. It all deals with the same aspect of human nature - desire, passion, yearning, release. Some just deal with it better than others.

 

[Weird Harold]

When I spoke of sex, I was referring to the feeling of arousal. As you suggested, in voyeur stories no actual sex can take place yet the stories can be very arousing nonetheless.

I intepreted "Sex" in the context of KM's original complaint that writing the mechanics of sexual intercourse was getting boring and reptitive.

There definitely has to be arousal, or at least titillation for a story to be "erotic" or "pornographic."

BUT that's the point - they ARE arousing. Erotica is meant to arouse. I think some authors poo-poo this aspect of it, like it's not important or that readers expecting to be aroused by erotic stories must be of lower intelligence or "lower class". As I said, writers who think this way - who feel that arousing stories are unimportant or sneer-worthy - should try another genre.

If you're talking about "who cares about spelling and grammar? It's just porn," then I whole-heartdly agree with you. At the root of things, they're stories and deserve the same attention to craftsmanship that any other genre of story deserves.

Still, I can symathize with KM's original complaint. Erotica does have the limiting factor that there are only so many ways to fit tab A into slot A, B, or C and there are only so many words that can be used to describe how they fit together. What makes things interesting is "who," "where," "why," and "when." Almost everyone already knows the "how."

 

[KillerMuffin]

Oh my head hurts. And writing about sex, the act itself, is still boring. How many ways can you do it? I get about a paragraph or two lately and think oy, I've got to flesh this bit out more. It's painful to read.

The reason, I think, is that the act of sex itself is nothing.

I read a story recently in the mind control section where their were two men playing chess and the pieces were women. The point was bogged down in the boring details that they were all naked and had vibrators inserted into them and were given controlled doses of orgasmic ecstasy. They weren't human, they were toys that two men played with who happened to have been human until they became chess pieces in that story. This story had completely parted ways with reality, which isn't such a bad thing.

We are all voyuers at heart, I think. What arouses us, in general, the most is seeing a sexual situation between two real people as opposed to watching a contrived porno flick. What would be more arousing? To see a couple couple making out and knowing that they were having sex by their sounds and movements, even though you couldn't see the actual sex, or seeing Buttman's Adventures in Sacramento Part 3? I'm not talking the jack off, desultory orgasm, bedtime scenario, I'm talking the kind of arousal that re-occurs when you think of it momentarily. Buttman will get you off where the previous two probably won't. But Buttman's sex is fleeting and non-connecting and the previous two you kind of feel like you're a part of it with them, sort of.

I watched Nina Hartley or whatever her name was once, and after getting off was out of the way, the flick was boring and she carried on like a Golden Retreiver.

Oh well, I guess it's all a matter of taste. I'm still writing erotica, though the sex bits in it seems to actually be getting shorter in favor of the story itself. Not what the average reader prefers, I think. I think they come here for the literary equivilent of Super Buttman and His Vibrating Whingy of Joy Do The Eastern Seaboard.

I just think it's funny how the sex that is the defining bit of erotica seems to be one of the least important parts to me. Ugh. Maybe I should write terrible poetry, dress all in black, and put on airs down at open mike night at Poetry Hut.

 

[Laurel]

The reason, I think, is that the act of sex itself is nothing.

I agree. Sex is a mental activity. The unvarnished physical aspect of it is pretty raw and uninteresting - it's the mystique, the emotions, the build-up that matter. I've read so many thousands of stories over the past few years and I tell ya, it's not quite the same as when I first started. The stories don't touch me as often as they used to. Like any addict ( ), it takes a more powerful dose to get me high anymore. It's the rarer story that captures my imagination...but when it does, WoW.

The stories that I personally enjoy are ones that a) touch me emotionally (i.e. tragedies, love stories, humor etc.) or b) touch me 'down there' (need no explanation). What both groups have in common is that they're well-told. They're STORIES, first and foremost. But there's sex, too - in one form or another. That's part of the genre.

I'm not a big porn video fan because generally the actors don't look like they're having a good time. That bothers me. When I was younger and Sex Was New, I could lose myself in the mechanical aspects of the films, but nowadays I've seen enough porn tits & ass to qualify as a plastic surgeon and I need more. Same with stories. Bouncing boobies and stiff weenies on their own don't grab me. They need passion.

But what I don't enjoy is over-written, over-intellectualized pap that I've seen passed off as "erotica". (This isn't something I see too much here - mostly in "erotica" magazines and websites.) I think sometimes authors get so carried away in trying to prove they're not "porn" that the piece ends up dry as a bone (and so do I, literally and figuratively). Dull, dull, dull. Trying to avoid porn stereotypes, they create stereotypes of their own. I say, don't be afraid of sex. Live it, love it, write it. It's not shameful. Remember your audience - they like sex. Tease them with sex. Don't bore them with it. That's all I'm saying.

 

[WickedWitch]

borong sex

KillerMuffin...Getting slot A into slot B is easy, but not the point always. There's a limited numbers of ways the Slot A & B can go together anyway.

Literotca may not my my forum. I am new at this, and have tried to write for women. Men seems to have no concept that casual couplings and crudity are not what women want. I have made one attempt at presenting the woman's perspective. (I was surprised by the number of responses I got. it didn't score all that well, but it touched the minority audience, which is what I wanted anyway.) It was a comfort, and I mean this sincerely, that there are other women out there like me.

By nature, most of us are not promiscuous, don't want to have sex with our childern, (Insest is a place I never go, it's ludicrous and disgusting. And the harm to the child is too well documented to be ignored. Yuk!). The idea of multiple sex is for the most part degrading; at least the way men write it. To my knowledge, no women have tried, although the world being what it is, I don't condemn those that find satisfaction there. I admit in a loving situation, I could find it aruosing inded. I'm not pure as the driven snow, and I don't judge. And I admit being curious, but only from the woman's perspective. I would like to see a women write on this subject. I write from expereince, and I have none there, and uboubtably never will.

To me, its the slow building of desire, and anticipation. I've always been that way. Four leter words have there place, and I have used them in real life, but sparingly. Yet when I did in an intimate situation, which for me has been a long time ago, they took on a special meaning.

Having been raised a "good girl" the forbidden attracts me, but not the digusting. I wish there was a subject for women only authors. But if there were, men would just pose as women, and we'd get the same old tired stuff anyway.

The point of all this is that men seem to have a lack of imagination. There is a sameness that leads to boredom. Inventive presentations of what most of us actually experience, and a slow build up of anticipation make the comonplace no longer commonplace. here ends my Epistle.

 

[Laurel]

Re: borong sex

The point of all this is that men seem to have a lack of imagination. There is a sameness that leads to boredom. Inventive presentations of what most of us actually experience, and a slow build up of anticipation make the comonplace no longer commonplace. here ends my Epistle.

I'm not sure that's true, or even fair. If you look around the board - you'll see many men who despise incest and enjoy romance and subtler stories. You'll also see many women requesting everything from father/daughter incest to bestiality.

Your perspective is certainly as valid as anyone else's, but to present yours as the perspective of ALL women is to assume that all men are alike and all women are alike. This is just not so. Not all women WANT romance. Not all men WANT hardcore. Women are a diverse and varied bunch, as are men.

 

[THEBRAT]

Re: Re: borong sex

I'm not sure that's true, or even fair. If you look around the board - you'll see many men who despise incest and enjoy romance and subtler stories. You'll also see many women requesting everything from father/daughter incest to bestiality.

Your perspective is certainly as valid as anyone else's, but to present yours as the perspective of ALL women is to assume that all men are alike and all women are alike. This is just not so. Not all women WANT romance. Not all men WANT hardcore. Women are a diverse and varied bunch, as are men.

I have to agree with Laure all women aren't alikel! I like reading incest stories but the moment I see animals in that story is when I stop reading it.

 

[Cockatoo]

Man, I can't leave you guys alone for a minute!

First of all, Laurel, THANK YOU for finding the other half of my brain, and for putting it to such good use. I was wondering where it had gone off to. Apparently, you've been consulting it when you wrote those last few posts.

Second of all, WickedWitch, hey, give a guy a chance! I know the patterns you're talking about, hell, everyone does, but the good writers transcend that monkey business. Penthouse-letter lists of names, unlikely physical attributes, hollywood-style fucking, and never-ending orgasmic moans in capital letters are the bane of this place. So are boring second-person narratives about roses and silk and bubble baths. The good stuff, and the good writers, are way better than that, they come in both sexes, and you can't swing a cat without hitting some real talent around here. Check out Dirty Old Man (Weird Harold's alter ego)'s material. Read Killer Muffin's stuff. These are the wunderkinder of erotica you're talking to on this very thread.

And third, everybody, hell yeah, writing about sex can be boring. HAVING sex can be boring. You can have dull, awkward, embarassing, painful sex, and you can read/write a dull, awkward, embarassing, and painful sex story. Try to avoid it. You can keep it fresh, and you can keep it good, both in the flesh and on paper. All that's required is an adventurous spirit, a light heart, some genuine love, and a fair degree of imagination. You don't abandon that part of your life altogether! You try to light that special spark again. Or, you should. If you don't, it's a crying shame.

I'm going to go tape my fingers together so I don't blab on this thing all night. Ciao, y'all.

 

[Eve_of_destruction]

I can't speak for the men...

...but as a woman, I know that Harlequin Romances are still selling strong after a gazillion years, yet I'd be willing to bet that probably half the members of Literotica are women... Am I right, Laurel? (You probably have a way of finding that information out, I'm sure - and I actually think other members would be curious about the percentage of men versus women members) You simply cannot say, "All men are pigs" or "All women hate men who are pigs" without generalizing very broadly on both sexes. I like watching graphic porn, and I like watching "Women: Stories of Passion" on Showtime (now if someone clever could just combine the two someday - give us actual penetration with a storyline worth watching - I'd be in heaven!)

Because some men are romantic, loving and caring partners, while some ARE pigs. Some women read Harlequin romances, while some read - and write, thank God! - really graphic erotica and pornography.

I'm just proud I'm one of those women

 

[Weird Harold]

Re: Man, I can't leave you guys alone for a minute!

Check out Dirty Old Man (Weird Harold's alter ego)'s material.

I think DOM's stuff will just confirm her opinion. Two out of three have been panned (with some justification) as "male fantasies") and the third doesn't concern itself with the woman's viewpoint at all -- she's an anonymous body until the very end.

One of the reasons I chose the pen name Dirty Old Man is because I write "male fantasies," i.e. stories for Dirty Old Men.

I'm gratified that most of my fan mail has come from women, but I don't understand women well enough to write stories aimed at them.

 

[frankies90]

Sex getting boring?

Killer....I'm fairly new here to literotica. I have a suggestion for you though. If your like writing the stories, but your getting bored with the sex scenes. My suggestion is, instead of having them have sex. Have them want it so bad, but don't get it.

My opinion is that it's rare that most of these fantasies are truly fulfilled as portraited in the stories. For instance, I have the same sex dream just when it gets really really good, I wake up. Does this make sense? lol Well, it does to me. Let me know what you think.

Frankies90 ~

 

[Cockatoo]

Re: Input.

Just recently, I started one IN the aftermath, right AFTER the sex, to focus on the intimate pillow-talk, so that I can't focus too hard on the preliminaries, again. We'll see if I can finish THAT one. Hell, I might have to put sex in it to keep it interesting- wouldn't that be a switch?

Hey, everybody, I did it. The story is "Bratface and Goofball," posted here at http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=21314 .

See, I wasn't just blowing smoke last month. I'm away from my computer starting tomorrow, but I'll see you all next month, okay?

 

[Samuari]

Cocky, its a good story, too. I hope that the readers apreicate the sweat that you poured into it. Have fun doing what ever it is that you are doing away from your putter for a month.

 

[IndianaJones]

I have a story, and it's a lovely one that I'd like to finish. It's just that they're to the point where they're fucking and it's, well, boring. Getting started is the most difficult part of the whole sex stuff, I found that I don't really care how tab A gets into either slots B, C, or D.

There's a slot D too? Cool!