To keep the review thread clean...

[WickedEve]

I'm totally Bad

I just remembered today is thursday--review day thursday. I'm too unreliable to do reviews. I've read some of the poems and... I'll be right back.

 

[annaswirls]

mysterious appearance

~

 

[Tathagata]

Thank you Neo for your very kind words on Promises Kept

 

[Angeline]

Who said anything about men? The grocery store has a produce section, doesn't it?

Well vegetables can't pay for dinner out. On the other hand they're so unopinionated.

 

[WickedEve]

Well vegetables can't pay for dinner out. On the other hand they're so unopinionated.

Yes, but afterwards, they can be dinner. LOL oh wait, that deserves another lol...LOL

 

[Angeline]

Yes, but afterwards, they can be dinner. LOL oh wait, that deserves another lol...LOL

ok, this is my official unofficial reply because every retort i came up with to your comment would utterly destroy my sweet image.

 

[WickedEve]

ok, this is my official unofficial reply because every retort i came up with to your comment would utterly destroy my sweet image.

What sweet image?

 

[Angeline]

What sweet image?

The one people used to associate with me.

 

[annaswirls]

I know I speak for many when I say thank you Neo for doing the reviews, especially on such an incredibly beautiful day. You are generous with your time.

I did not know the inhumanity poems were coming out, I should have held off on my silly poem looking so frivilous
~anna

 

[champagne1982]

I know I speak for many when I say thank you Neo for doing the reviews, especially on such an incredibly beautiful day. You are generous with your time.

I did not know the inhumanity poems were coming out, I should have held off on my silly poem looking so frivilous
~anna

A break from intensity is always welcome

 

[Maria2394]

hey, neo

thanks for the mention of raw material today in your reviews. and also everyone who commented, your FB is always much appreciated

ps. my welder is my husband for those of you who have wondered, he aint all bad, hes pretty decent to put up with my manic ass all the time

thanks again your praise makes me feel all funky inside!!!

 

[The Mutt]

Hep me! Hep me!

Reltne left a very nice comment on my poem Running Water Never Freezes, but 'e also chided me for using the word 'like' too often. (I'm not complaining, Reltne. I crave discipline.)
Now, I have never had any training in poemistry and I don't know what the accepted standards are. I even end sentences with prepositions. I write the way I talk, and I write poems to be read aloud. When I read it, it didn't seem excessive to me. 4 times in a forty line poem.
Lines 5 and 6 - She gripped it like folk wisdom and shook it like a fist...
Line 10 - (her hair) whipped in the wind like Halloween...
Line 33 - She clutched her cane like a root on a cliffside...
Is it too much? What is the conventional wisdom? How might I have said it better?
All helpful comments and laughs of derision are welcome. Thanx, gurus.

 

[The_Fool]

Sorry, I’ve been wandering around lost again.

First off thanks for the comments for my “Slow Burn Blues” and thanks to Eve for the review. You know it’s funny, the section you quoted was pretty much an afterthought. There is always a story and the story for this one is YDD pulled the phrase Slow Burn Blues out of “Torch Singer” and told me to go write something around it. Months later I figured out what to write. Go figure.

Second, thanks to Carrie for the Inhumanity STC, the comments for my two entries and to Neo for the review. As much inhumanity as is on the world news, too often we forget the stuff that happens next door or around the block. For me, my sanity check is a social worker. She has worked in both the Nursing Home and in Child Welfare. What she has seen (as has Neo and Boo) is heartrending.

Finally thanks for all the general encouragement from my friends. Writing outside of school papers and work emails has been way too limited. Hopefully I can keep some of my focus and do more, cuz it’s cooooool…


Fooooool

 

[BooMerengue]

Well, Mutt? I'll just, like, go take a look, ok? lol

I want to thank everyone for the comments on my Inhumanity entry. I got so disheartened as the deadline drew nearer, and so got further and further from any entry at all. I was about to give it up when I saw the pictures of this particular form of Partial Birth Abortion. Sobering Photos Don't look unless you're ready. It was an amazing turnout, tho. I loved this challenge and what it brought out in people. Such kind souls here. I love you all!

 

[BooMerengue]

Mutt? I just read it again. You could change those likes if you like, but I think its ok. They dont appear overused to me or repetitive. Try some changes; see what you think...

 

[DeepAsleep]

I've recieved many wonderful comments on my Inhumanity poem and I wanted to say thank you to everyone who took the time to vote, comment and/or send feedback to me. I'm sort of glad it's my first 'h' poem. Thanks a bunch, and I read all of your poems, too - I'll get around to commenting through fb, eventually.. Forgive me, I'm lazy.

~D.A.

 

[annaswirls]

libra lost

I was the first to comment on this one-- which is fine, but I hope that if you skipped it, you will turn around and check it out.




Libra Lost

 

[Tathagata]

Tuesday reviews

Apparently Ms Blackwood is on vacation...eating frozen pudding and redefining " bikini line"
( I asked for pictures for proof and she emailed me a guffaw)
She did however ask if I could do her reviews on Tuesday.
I offered to do a few other things and I believe I can still hear her laughing.
Be that as it may I'll be doing her reviews tomorrow.
depending on the amount of poems and how busy my work is they may not be done till the late afternoon.


Don't forget to tip your waiters and waitresses
Enjoy the show.
__________________

 

[Angeline]

New Poems

~~~

Once and Now, by Angeline, is a stunning, slightly cynical take on the fairy tale condition, I never really believed in Prince Charming anyway, this is some of ange's finer work, I truly enjoyed this read,

...Night must be enough
happily ever after
because it absents the day,
because we are grateful
for hours that skirt
the edge of memory,
because night is neverland,
knitting a cloak of quiet
against uncertainty...

~~~
happy writing Poets, and have a lovely day!~! xoxoxoxoxo

Thank you so much, sis, for saying this and all you other dear poets who voted and commented. I have been thinking a lot about fairy tales lately, and I *was* feeling rather cynical on the subject, but I thought it was one of those throwaway poems. Just goes to show you, lol.


Ange

 

[tungtied2u]

Humbled

Wow! I just realized I received my first "h" for my poem "Raggedy Ann".

I am feel very humbled and honored. This [poem was intended to be about the child sex slave trade, so prevalent not only in America, but all the world.

This "h" is for humanity, which strikes me so deeply every day as I read the lines posted on these threads.

We are all our brother's and sister's keepers. With open eyes and raoring voice, we can impact others. Post your work. Make an impact. Shape the world.

Thanks so much to all of you.

 

[WickedEve]

Maria and anna

Wicked Eve gives us three, no, make that 4, stunners today, starting with:

Crash Report

...Venus colliding
with Uranus. Asshole,
gun it. Shoot across!...

despite this touch of humor, it isnt a funny poem, and anyone, myself included, who has been in a really bad accident knows what a horrible, surreal feeling there is to the whole thing. Glad youre still with us Eve

Coffee Maker
this is without a doubt, the sexiest poem I have read on this wite in quite a long time, a must read

...like my grinder? I coo
from countertop perch.

you want your coffee,
quick drip. finger...
~~~

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=157244[/url]Iced[/URL]
this one is listed as non-erotic, I dont see why, seems very erotic to me

I love this part-

...not spilt for his smooth sheet
memo for inking
cursive torso
firm thigh words
whore

and, Summer Drive. I won't quote because its a shortie, but is crisp and cool, much like a cloudburst in the middle of summer

Maria thank you for the great reviews on my poems.
And anna thanks for commenting on crash report. I guess I haven't heard enough uranus jokes. lol Actually, it didn't dawn on me that I was basically saying "colliding with your anus." I was trying to pair uranus with "asshole, gun it." My mind doesn't work right.

 

[echoes_s]

Re: more new poems

my apologies, wrong board

 

[echoes_s]

New Poems

Just This, by echoes_s

...
she is innocent
i cry,
four bared walls,
pains reflection off tears,
nails grasped to stain
splinter new grain into wood...

and The storm has some excellent descriptions and observations, you write so well echoes, always a pleasure to read you

echoes shows us how she works her word magic in this piece, in fact, she has several today, but I liked these the best, so the rest of you all, readem, vote and send FB

Thanks for the great reviews Maria although i keep arguing with you all that i dont see how you can see this writing as being well

Thank you also tungtied2u, Tath, flyguy69 for reading and your comments/votes

 

[eagleyez]

heya Tath.

thanks for your comments and hunches about the poem SALTY.

your opinions are welcome as always.





T.

 

[Angeline]

Thank you dear Tath and all who commented on my poem, Dawning. Yesterday was a good day for me, a hopeful day and that's where the poem came from. And I really did see a rainbow last night--right before twilight. It was perfect.