"To keep the review thread clean..."

[WickedEve]

Unless I'm mistaken (which I very often am) the narrative voice is that of an adult reminiscing about a childhood experience. So I think the words work in context. They aren't a quote. They are a remembrance and would accordingly be couched in adult language.

I thought about that, but not until after I made my last comment. Which isn't surprising.

 

[WickedEve]

yeah poo and pee here too I just cannot bring myself to putting them in a poem!!! ahh!!!

No. No. Keep your shit and piss. (I swear, I cringe just writing those words. Same goes for puke and snot.) I think maria was right about some people not being able to handle it. Maybe I just can't handle something that real. I have a tendency to pretty up everything.

 

[Angeline]

No. No. Keep your shit and piss. (I swear, I cringe just writing those words. Same goes for puke and snot.) I think maria was right about some people not being able to handle it. Maybe I just can't handle something that real. I have a tendency to pretty up everything.

Oh you do not. Go back and read your poems.

This is not, btw, a vote in favor of shit, piss, snot or puke.

 

[Sara Crewe]

I am kinda the same way, Eve. I dont think I admitted to the opposite sex that I had bodily functions until I was 19. I did it with style though...

I was at a youth hostel in France and we had just come back to it after being out all day without access to a bathroom. I had been drinking water all day so the second I came through the doors I started running up the three flights of stairs to the bathroom and I thought my friend was right behind me doing the same thing ...I yelled out, "Oh my god, if I don't get to the top soon I am going to pee my pants!!"

I almost fell down the stairs when a totally male voice said, "Well, you better hurry up then." I stopped dead on the stairs and he just laughed as he passed me and slammed the bathroom door in my face. Bastard. He was a cute bastard though...

 

[WickedEve]

Oh you do not. Go back and read your poems.

This is not, btw, a vote in favor of shit, piss, snot or puke.

Have I written something gross and forgotten about it?
I do have that one poem about Taking a Piss in the South. I fainted three times before submitting it. God, I'm still lightheaded about the whole thing. The Devil made me do it. And he makes me masturbate. Damn him. Well, he's already damned...

 

[WickedEve]

I am kinda the same way, Eve. I dont think I admitted to the opposite sex that I had bodily functions until I was 19. I did it with style though...

I was at a youth hostel in France and we had just come back to it after being out all day without access to a bathroom. I had been drinking water all day so the second I came through the doors I started running up the three flights of stairs to the bathroom and I thought my friend was right behind me doing the same thing ...I yelled out, "Oh my god, if I don't get to the top soon I am going to pee my pants!!"

I almost fell down the stairs when a totally male voice said, "Well, you better hurry up then." I stopped dead on the stairs and he just laughed as he passed me and slammed the bathroom door in my face. Bastard. He was a cute bastard though...

I told my lover that I don't have gas, I never burp, sweat, or anything gross. I'm above all that. I'm sure I'll eventually explode, though.

 

[Angeline]

Have I written something gross and forgotten about it?
I do have that one poem about Taking a Piss in the South. I fainted three times before submitting it. God, I'm still lightheaded about the whole thing. The Devil made me do it. And he makes me masturbate. Damn him. Well, he's already damned...

Yeah that's the one--the pissing one.

Your poems are not what I'd call gross--they're honest though. That's what I meant about the not prettying them up.

And you know we'd have both written snot, fart, whatever poems in the past if there had been a poetry challenge. In the spirit of being good moderators, of course.

Sara Crewe writes dirty giraffe poems.

Love,
Rumorgeline

 

[WickedEve]

Yeah that's the one--the pissing one.

Your poems are not what I'd call gross--they're honest though. That's what I meant about the not prettying them up.

And you know we'd have both written snot, fart, whatever poems in the past if there had been a poetry challenge. In the spirit of being good moderators, of course.

Sara Crewe writes dirty giraffe poems.

Love,
Rumorgeline

Okay, I'll use any word in a poem--except ooze and unicorn. I will not allow any oozing unicorns in my poetry. And certainly not a farting, puking, shitting, pissing, sweating, booger eating, slobbering, asshole fucking unicorn. I draw the line there!

 

[champagne1982]

Okay, I'll use any word in a poem--except ooze and unicorn. I will not allow any oozing unicorns in my poetry. And certainly not a farting, puking, shitting, pissing, sweating, booger eating, slobbering, asshole fucking unicorn. I draw the line there!

PRUDE

 

[WickedEve]

PRUDE

Well, well, well... Did you just volunteer to write a unicorn poem? I dare you. And don't make it pretty.

 

[Tzara]

Suddenly I have irrestible urge to write a unicorn poem.

Ode to the UNIX Kernel

To those fine threads of code
Laid at system's center, a brief ode.

Your multitasking is so sleek
And elegant, computer geeks

All sing your praise. No scorn
Awaits you, graceful UNIcorn.

 

[Sara Crewe]

There once was a giraffe from Manhattan
who only swore in pig latin.
He played tunes with his tongue
while his friend licked his bum
and screamed, “it feels just like satin!”

 

[Angeline]

There once was a giraffe from Manhattan
who only swore in pig latin.
He played tunes with his tongue
while his friend licked his bum
and screamed, “it feels just like satin!”

There was once a lady Canuck
who insisted giraffe poems don't suck.
Her friend down in Maine
thought Oh what a pain,
now I'll have to write bestial muck.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

If you people are gonna start writing poems about animals, there's a whole monthly challenge thread going on for that! Hmpf.

 

[Angeline]

Okay, I'll use any word in a poem--except ooze and unicorn. I will not allow any oozing unicorns in my poetry. And certainly not a farting, puking, shitting, pissing, sweating, booger eating, slobbering, asshole fucking unicorn. I draw the line there!

and rainbow. i remember you ruling out rainbow forever.

 

[Angeline]

If you people are gonna start writing poems about animals, there's a whole monthly challenge thread going on for that! Hmpf.

Biatch!

 

[annaswirls]

I told my lover that I don't have gas, I never burp, sweat, or anything gross. I'm above all that. I'm sure I'll eventually explode, though.

women don't sweat, they glow

 

[annaswirls]

Okay, I'll use any word in a poem--except ooze and unicorn. I will not allow any oozing unicorns in my poetry. And certainly not a farting, puking, shitting, pissing, sweating, booger eating, slobbering, asshole fucking unicorn. I draw the line there!

maybe you could get Giant_Dripping_Pussy to write that one for you

Okay now I am feeling totally self-conscious about bodily functions and think I will go write a poem about why they sell snowman decorations in a place that does not snow...

 

[TheRainMan]

4-25

.....

 

[champagne1982]

Well, well, well... Did you just volunteer to write a unicorn poem? I dare you. And don't make it pretty.

LOL. You should know better... No Prudes Please

 

[Guest]

I'm not looking through all 64 pages of this thread to find whether Mr. fly has posted 30 poems in total of his attempts, but I am curious if he did.

 

[Sara Crewe]

............

 

[arienette]

oh what a lovely travel partner! see you in hell, arienette!

Aww, thank you!
Okay, so I lied and didn't start yesterday, but I will be starting once I get out of the shower and will post when I'm finished.

I swear. No, really, I will.

 

[KittenishJane]

I

KittenishJane
​

I know this is not an oak tree in the meadow but I had to carve my devotion somewhere.

thank you.

 

[duckiesmut]

I'm not looking through all 64 pages of this thread to find whether Mr. fly has posted 30 poems in total of his attempts, but I am curious if he did.

I tried to...coughs politely...motivate him, but it seems he's a busy little fly these days.