❓ PLP Inquires II ❓

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

For a real talent (for a general PG talent shot) it would be guitar, and just to be different, classical guitar. (Yes, I actually do know notes and stuff).

Hahaha - for here though, I definitely want to enter the orgasm race with @Justadesperatewifeandmom!

You are on. When it comes inconsequential nonsensical competitions, I am a serious competitor. I play to win.

 

[jason28053]

I’m almost this damn good

He has the best name though…. Hung

 

[Paul_Chance]

It's to do with the English origins of the Kansas settlers and the French origins of the explorers who mapped Arkansas. But they both come from the same root, from a Sioux word, kansa, meaning, "south wind." Just one has an English twist on the pronunciation, the other a French twist.

I don't know what the source of this was, but it could be an original misunderstanding of what was being said.

The Lakota (Sioux) word for the region known as Kansas was Koze (pronounced Kohn-Zay), with the glottal stop on the O. That glottal stop is hard for English speakers to hit, so it became "kan" as in "kan-zay" and then from there, morphed to Kansas. It referred to the tribe that lived in the region, prior to the westward expansion.

South Wind is Tate (wind) Itokagata (south).

That was the free Lakota lesson for the day.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

I don't know what the source of this was, but it could be an original misunderstanding of what was being said.

The Lakota (Sioux) word for the region known as Kansas was Koze (pronounced Kohn-Zay), with the glottal stop on the O. That glottal stop is hard for English speakers to hit, so it became "kan" as in "kan-zay" and then from there, morphed to Kansas. It referred to the tribe that lived in the region, prior to the westward expansion.

South Wind is Tate (wind) Itokagata (south).

That was the free Lakota lesson for the day.

Oh, fascinating! I freely admit I don't know much about the Lakota origins. Just that French explorers and English settlers encountered that same root word, and how they adapted that word to their own languages is how we get two different pronunciations of two very similar place names.

 

[StacyLeigh]

I don't know what the source of this was, but it could be an original misunderstanding of what was being said.

The Lakota (Sioux) word for the region known as Kansas was Koze (pronounced Kohn-Zay), with the glottal stop on the O. That glottal stop is hard for English speakers to hit, so it became "kan" as in "kan-zay" and then from there, morphed to Kansas. It referred to the tribe that lived in the region, prior to the westward expansion.

South Wind is Tate (wind) Itokagata (south).

That was the free Lakota lesson for the day.

Oh, fascinating! I freely admit I don't know much about the Lakota origins. Just that French explorers and English settlers encountered that same root word, and how they adapted that word to their own languages is how we get two different pronunciations of two very similar place names.

Before becoming a transplant Arkansan, I wondered the same thing.

https://www.businessinsider.com/why-we-pronounce-kansas-and-arkansas-differently-2014-2

 

[Paul_Chance]

Oh, fascinating! I freely admit I don't know much about the Lakota origins. Just that French explorers and English settlers encountered that same root word, and how they adapted that word to their own languages is how we get two different pronunciations of two very similar place names.

Yeah, and I don't doubt that someone somewhere simply got the two words confused. In those days (early contact), if you think about it, it was often two or more groups of people who were trying to puzzle each others language out. It's real easy to imagine two people sitting down, talking in trade language (a polyglot of multiple languages) and one guy pointing south and saying "what do you call that direction" and the other one misunderstanding what he was asking as who lives over there and saying "Koze", and the first one writing it down as "south = koze".

One of the entertaining things about the Lakota is the whole name for the combined Lakota/Dakota/Nakota nations was "Sioux", which is actually a shortening of an Ojibway/Chippewa word "nadawessiox" - which means "little snakes" or "grass snakes". LOL - there was no love lost between the Ojibway and the Sioux because there was a lot of contested territory between them.

Again, easy to see the two guys sitting down and one pointing west and saying who lives over there and the other "oh, those guys are fucking snakes, little snakes". And the original guy writing in his notebook "Sioux".

 

[Paul_Chance]

Before becoming a transplant Arkansan, I wondered the same thing.

https://www.businessinsider.com/why-we-pronounce-kansas-and-arkansas-differently-2014-2

Ah, that's awesome - thanks Stacy!

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

Talent show talent? Definitely my tap-dancing routine.

 

[Wand3rlust]

Not finishing things. I'll start something, get to a point where it is OH SO NEARLY DONE.. and then boom. I get distracted and move on to the... oh look, squirrels!

 

[Orchidea73]

Not finishing things. I'll start something, get to a point where it is OH SO NEARLY DONE.. and then boom. I get distracted and move on to the... oh look, squirrels!

I feel you girl. lol

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?


Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

 

[AlpineFresco]

2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.

^ This is hilarious, Pulpy

But, I like attention for different things at different times. I enjoy attention for a job well done, whether it's in a professional capacity or it's cooking something special.
If we're talking romantic attention, I do not attract this. It would be flattering to be approached but it hasn't happened in years. Not throwing a pity party here, I certainly don't need this attention but it would be fun to be flirted with IRL.
But, I am a more private person in many ways, and sometimes it is nice to not be seen, and to just have my own space.

Do I like giving attention? Sure, if I think it'll be well received. For the people I care about (romantic and non), I like to have that contact. I am not always great at this when work gets heavy, as you well know!

I like to give my friends attention when they do something brave or cool (these are relative terms, and I take that into account), or sometimes just to say "I value your friendship."
Unhealthy? Interesting term. I will kind of sidestep it and say I see people making a scene, online and IRL - I feel like, and I might not be loved for this, women have more success here than men do, as men tend to be looked at with pity for playing up for attention while for women, it may in fact net them the attention they want (dudes be thirsty, that's for sure). But, I am also aware I only see a small slice of the world, so objective reality and my experiences may not line up, much or at all.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?


Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

So, the more time I spend “on” and “out and about” the sooner I will want down time, and no attention at all. The longer I am isolated, the sooner I will want more interaction and attention. Then of course, there are types of attention, some are good, some are not. Then there are some ways that I get overwhelmed easily, and I have silly little cheats to cover. For example, sometimes I have to lead a class, I will rearrange everything circular, so I am sitting with them, rather than standing in front. I abhor stages and if I have to speak on one, I wear incorrect lenses to impair my distance vision. I hate pedestals and pointed focus. I also keep my hair really long, I may style it short, but I can pull it and flip it down fast. It is like my cloak of invisibility, and I will hide behind it lol. Compliments that are too “flowery” “fluffy” make me very uncomfortable. "Too" depends on the person, the words, the delivery. Or looking at me “wrong”, yeah I know, no I can’t verbalize wrong. These thresholds are all increased by how well I know the people. I would say male partners, I am higher on the spectrum, maybe 7. But I am also easy, slap me on the ass, box checked for a little. I honestly prefer a touch or gesture over sweet nothings or feeling words. General world, lower, maybe 3 or 4. I have a pretty solid ability to be invisible out and about, when I choose. What do I do when I want attention or interaction? um now, mostly lit. I use lit to balance the lower interaction points. I am gone from Lit during higher interaction periods. The best equalizer, no, but isn’t it a common equalizer here?

Giving attention are some of the same things. I do like to be the person seeing something, to a point. I can’t be too fluffy or flowery. I won’t lie to you. All sorts of things cause me to give attention, including seeing something, I just want to, I can tell they just need it right now, or reciprocation, both because they were attentive to me, or because I want them to be.. What makes me hate giving someone attention? They need more than I can give. Huge energy zapper, too easy to get sucked in. Also, the people that seem to want you to repeat the same thing, like a script. They literally feed you the lead, you know what to say. It is true, it is fine, 5 minutes later, same thing. I recently counted someone giving me a cue 37 times in 3 days. If it didn’t work saying it the 1st, the 2nd, the 3rd, why? Each cue takes me one step closer to the edge, and if I don’t bolt, I’m going to snap at them. And again, I often prefer offering a symbolic gesture, or standing with you, over complimentary fluffy words, is just more comfortable. Going to lunch, coffee, buying you that jerky you really like, that book I think you will enjoy, even a fun gif or picture etc.

Healthy versus unhealthy, no matter what the call is, or what the story is about, I don’t judge. Sooner or later I’ll be the one under the microscope and that is no good. This also goes both ways. For example some things are unhealthy to avoid attention. Some women gain weight to avoid attention, lose it to gain it back. Can’t really say honey, you are now way too thin, when you are too heavy. Some people drink, some smoke, some gamble, some post indecent pictures on the internet. We all have unhealthy vices for many reasons, and I am not touching theirs with a 10 foot pole as I have no right to comment until I give up mine, and I’m keeping mine. I like my devices.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?


Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

Generally I'm at about a 3. I prefer anonymity. I work in a job where I have to be the center of attention for about 90 minutes every week, and they're the most exhausting 90 minutes. Afterwards I come home and curl up on the couch and try to avoid people as much as I can. Occasionally I'll do things that I know draw attention - such as wearing a kilt around town on St. Patrick's Day or lederhosen during Oktoberfest. But that's a whimsical sort of attention where strangers might or might not think I'm an idiot, but they're not judging my work or ideas. But I usually feel much more comfortable in anonymity.

Unless someone wants to touch my penis. Then that's attention I'll usually welcome (depending on who the someone is).

I hope, and I like to think, that I'm the sort of person who gives positive attention. I'm not typically the sort to point and laugh when someone stumbles. But if someone's hurting, if they're in pain (either physical or emotional), if there's grief or trauma, I try to pay attention. Or if someone does something good for another person. My track record isn't flawless, but I try to give credit where credit is due.

And yes, I see people do unhealthy things for attention all the time (one of my jobs is in the high school - unhealthy attention is an everyday occurrence). Unless they're doing something dangerous or harmful to others, I try not to pay the unhealthy attention-seekers any mind.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum?

I think I vacillate wildly on how much attention I want depending on the day, my mood, what's going on in life and how much I feel like I have to give. On a bad day, I'm at a 2 and I don't want people to perceive or remember I exist. On a great day I'm maybe an 8 and I want to be surrounded in people. I think the form of attention I crave is more of interaction rather than one sided. I like the conversation, the ideas building on each other, the jokes topping each other, the community. Although sometimes it's a nice boost, the one sided compliments don't give me the attention that I crave because it's so one sided.

What do you like to get attention for?

I like to get attention for my humor and for being a good friend. I like to be noticed for being unique and differently sexy. Occasional attention for looks is nice but can feel quickly weird to me. There is absolutely a reason I don't have an AmPics. My lil overthinking brain simply could not.

What do you hate to get attention for?

This is very Lit specific but - there is thing that people say to be and I know they are just trying to be nice and complimentary but it goes something like -
- wow I can't believe [a popular Lit person] has messaged me
- how do you have time to keep these threads going and have a life
- you probably don't have time to talk to me because you get so many messages
Put simply, I hate this and I know it's (usually) meant kindly but it feels so othering and weird and sort of insinuates that I have no life. I don't mind a 'thank you' but acting like anyone on Lit is anything other than a normal person or that I would think I'm better in any way than anyone else irks me.

Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention?

I do feel self conscious when I don't feel interacted with or seen. I imagine most people feel that way. I have these moments when I feel like I've done something to piss literally everyone off and then I just have to get a grip and remember I'm not that special. Haha...

Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention?

Absolutely and often. Especially if I feel I can't reciprocate my time or attention. I'm not a person who enjoys just soaking up other people's time or attention (more on that later) but I like the give and take. If I don't have time or mental bandwidth to give someone, I feel terrible and pull away.

Who do you like to get attention from?

I like attention mostly from people who I like and respect and who are thoughtful. A dozen people who I don't know can give me attention and that's fine but one person who I know really knows or sees me can give me a moment of their attention and it fills me up. There is also a factor of ... are you doing this exact same thing for everyone? Cool and thank you for including me but it will carry less weight.

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else?

I very much do and I often wish I had more time and mental horsepower to give to certain people. I love encouraging and ego-boosting and making sure people feel interacted with or seen.

What makes you want to give someone attention?

I like to give attention to people I know will appreciate it. Its the flip side of above. If I know you're getting a hundred people telling you that you have perfect nipples, I may think it to myself and never send a message but if I know my attention might make a difference? I can't run fast but I'm running. I fully acknowledge this probably sounds extremely arrogant, although that isn't my intention.

What makes you hate to give someone your attention?

Attention vampires! Give me a good attention whore any day but I will break out the garlic for attention vampires. These take various forms but are most often of the very needy "ask me questions, compliment my pictures, tell me I'm amazing" type, the pitiful "no one likes me but you" type, or the mom "did you see my message, why haven't you answered me, you must hate me" type. (Just my mom?) These people happily suck the energy out of others and make zero effort to reciprocate. Sadly, these people are also often the people who will read this and assume they don't do it.

Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?

I've definitely seen people here and in reality do some truly unhealthy things for attention. And by unhealthy I mean, trading their physical safety and/or the boundaries they set for themselves for attention, trading relationships with friends to allow themselves to be isolated with someone who feeds them constant attention but wants to be the only one giving it, and trading their mental peace chasing the attention of people who literally couldn't care less.

I think Lit could do with a sizeable and frequent dose of self awareness sometimes. I think this place is truly an amazing corner of the internet. It allows for love and friendships and creativity and exploration but I've seen people who don't get a lot of attention in their "real" life completely lose themselves in the pursuit of anonymous attention or the dopamine hit of that little red notification box. I'm no better than anyone but I want to keep making the effort to stay anchored in reality and be satisfied occasionally with my own attention and company.

Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

Thanks to everyone who gave such thoughtful answers.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

(Just my mom?)

I can't say just yours, but not mine. She is similar to me, and I always been the child who needs nothing and she doesn't need to worry about. We text holidays, sends gifts, maybe call each other a couple times a year. She has full faith I am always ok, I have full faith she is always ok. I live across the country, I have a younger child, my younger brothers are hot messes, so this works for us.

 

[PandemicReader8]

where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

For me, it's a bit situational. I don't need to be the center of attention in social situations, but I do need connection from those closet to me. Even then, not constant "time", just quality, if that makes sense. Compliments do make me uneasy, i often appreciate hearing them, but rarely know how to respond

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?

I am fine with giving attention, compliments, affirmatiin, etc.. I have seen first hand a lit of unhealthy attention seekers.

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

04.29.23

Attention

Yesssssss?

If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum?

Maybe a 4 or 5? I do like positive selfie responses.

What do you like to get attention for?

Fun stuff. Sexy stuff.

What do you hate to get attention for?

Bad attention. Not sexy stuff.

Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention?

I came back to Lit recently and had this weird "I've lost my mojo" kind of feeling. I just feeling like I've lost my appeal for some reason. I have no idea why. Maybe it's just people I used to be tight with moving on. Or I'm kinda just like the new kid in school or some shit. Or I'm generally dealing with personal stuff. Or a combination of all of it. It's better now but there's always going to be that part of me that isn't convinced that people like me.

Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

Nah not really. I do like the ladies (and occasional dude and totally open to otherwise) so attention from them is fun and can feel good.

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else?

sure

What makes you want to give someone attention?

If someone is cool or funny and like their vibe.

What makes you hate to give someone your attention?

I think its a drag when I feel like I'm one of 70 people theyre talking to.

Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?

I murdered someone's ex once. That was a classic case of "zigged when I should have zagged."

Totally kidding, of course. But nah, I kinda know when to see myself out. I've seen others be generally obnoxious for attention. And that's not fun.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

04.25.23

Ok so I have a hard question coming so I thought I'd ask an easy one first.

If you had to enter a talent show today, what would your talent be?

Either singing or possibly playing guitar. I wouldn't win at either, but I'd have fun.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?


Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

I'm probably on the higher end, 8 ish? certainly 6 or 7. I kind of like being the center of attention. I am very gregarious and I'm definitely an extravert. Especially if it's good attention. E.g. making people laugh, or talking about something they find interesting (e.g. presentations), or just kind of being a "life of the party." I'm often the first, or one of the first, up to dance at various occations. So...Ok...maybe 8 ish. I've been called a ham. I generally like it to be the kind of thing though where it's not just about "ME" but where I'm brinigng others to the table by being the first. Often I've seen that others "want to" but they are not sure. etc. So, I'll break the ice, but then, honestly, I am quite capable of stepping back.

Case in point (recent). Friend had a 50th birthday and I helped set up and run the Karaoke machine. I ended up (and have before) being kind of the MC for the evening. I started it out too, sang the first song, and then worked to get others up. Now mind you, I'm "OK" at singing. And I'm not smart, I don't always pick songs that are easy for me or in my range (I know a few and should, but like this last time, I went with something fun, not necessarily my best). But I got things rolling and more and more joined in. There were a couple really good people and I think I did really good job (and others have told me so) in both giving them kudos for doing well and in encouraging others to come up (one guy - who I didn't know well - approached me after and thanked me. He told me that he had never thought he would have the guts to do Karaoke, but I made him feel great about it. Honestly that was the best part...even better than the margaritas).

I think I only really feel overwhelmed with attention if it's fake, over the top or negative somehow. I do not like negative attention. Being called out for problems or whatever.

I think yes, sometimes I feel left out if I don't get attention. Sometimes it's jealousy? Sometimes it's feeling like I didn't measure up in some way and feels like rejection. I don't it's pathological, and mostly I think it's normal. But yeah, if I don't get attention, I do feel bad. Although as I've grown, this is less an issue.

I think I now (as an older person) have a pretty good balence too with the giving attention. As I've assumed leadership roles in various places I've realized how important it is to give positive attention to people. Even introverts love some positive attention if it isn't too often, too much, and doesn't put too much on them to respond to it. I try to make sure that when I have the opportunity, that I'm quite to give that when it's due. I also have worked to step back and keep my mouth shut and listen to others. In meeting, in conferences, etc. There was a period in my career (OK, pretty much up until about 10 years ago), where I would jump in too much (retrospectively) in certain settings. Basically trying to take attention away from others, when I really shouldn't have been (in my defense, it is not behavior that is out of the norm for my profession...we are assholes). But in the last decade, I've backed off on that: I've made my bones. I now am more careful about that, and usually try to be more helpful.

Things that make me want to give other attention: I think for sure there is the sense that people who engage me get my attention. Sometimes it's a pretty face. Believe me I fight that in some settings, not in others. Sometimes it's a intellect or a personality. It really depends on the setting.

I don't think I've done unhealthy things for attention myself. I've seen people who do. I've done some crazy things (do not ask about the flowby episode...hair grows back though, so....). But I don't think they were unhealthy or bad for me (I drink too much...flowby thing...but I drink because the rest are funnier then). I have seen people who stay in terrible relationships because they are scared to be alone. I'm not sure that's the same, but I think it kind of is? I've seen people who did things they hated because they got praised for it. Eventually it drives them into the ground.

I suppose we talk about this in the context of romantic/erotic relationships. Here is one place I think, mostly, I am pretty balenced, although I'm willing to entertain gentle corrections to that claim. I think do love - mostly - to shower my special person with some attention. Whether it be praise, and nice things, or whatever. I think though I also can be really needed on the attention side for my partner. That might be a challenge for some and I might not handle it well when I don't get the attention I want. I don't think what I want is that crazy, but who am I to say.

That's what I got.

 

[Deleted member 6568729]

04.29.23

Attention

I'd like to preface this question with two things -
1. I'd really like some answers with thought behind them. They don't have to be long but I think some introspection here would be most useful. We can get back to what your favorite sandwich lube is later.
2. There is absolutely no shame or judgement with this question. If you say you don't like attention on some level, I will think you're a liar or at least think you're weird for posting an answer at all.


If the need for attention is a spectrum (we love a good spectrum here at PLP Inquires) with agoraphobia at one end (1) and histrionic personality disorder at the other end (10), where does your point fall on the spectrum? What do you like to get attention for? What do you hate to get attention for? Do you feel bad or self conscious when you don't get any attention? Do you feel overwhelmed with a certain amount of attention? Who do you like to get attention from?

What about giving the attention - do you like to be the person seeing someone else? What makes you want to give someone attention? What makes you hate to give someone your attention? Have you seen people do or have you ever done unhealthy things for attention from others?


Again reiterating, this is a total judgment free zone with zero shame intended. I think we all have an occasional attention whore inside us so this is mostly about thinking about how she acts and what she thinks.

I think I fall in the middle somewhere. So...I want/crave attention when I'm purposefully doing something to get it (like posting a pic on Lit) or have done a good job (like during an evaluation at work). I'm a pretty insecure girl, so the dopamine boost is a nice rush and helps my ego a bit. But... if it brings me a lot of attention, I quickly get uncomfortable and do whatever I need to do to get out of the limelight.

I don't mind giving people my attention as long as it's healthy. The worst thing I've found is when people come to expect your time and attention and not take into consideration your work, your family, and your life outside of them.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

05.03.23

Let's have a sexier question!

Do you think you have what it takes to be a unicorn? No, not the mythical beast but could you be a third for another couple? Do threesomes interest you? Would you find it difficult to keep emotions out of it? What parts would you find most appealing? Least appealing?

Feel free to share all your threesome experiences below

 

[lakesailer_mi]

I'll start because mine is totally boring.

Do you think you have what it takes to be a unicorn? No, not the mythical beast but could you be a third for another couple?

Nope.

Do threesomes interest you?

Nope.

Would you find it difficult to keep emotions out of it?

Yes. Yes I would. I would find that very difficult.

What parts would you find most appealing?

Well, sex is always appealing. I also particularly enjoy the visual of a woman who is in the throws of passion and pleasure. I think MFM (which if I was to join another heterosexual couple would be the case), is actually a little hot. I suppose FMF with a lesbian/bi couple could work too.

Least appealing?

This is the long part! LOL. First off, I don't share well. Not at all. It is really one of the myriad things I didn't get in kindergarten. I am possessive. Then, see answer to feelings. Yeah, so this would blow up in my face and not be good for anyone. (and I'm sure as hell not inviting anyone to join Mrs. Sailor and I).
Second. I'm competitive. This is gonna turn ugly. Either I'm going to be all about outdoing the other dude, or I'm going to get depressed and angry that I'm the end all, be all, bestest ever. (also see prior post in this thread about being the center of attention).
Third. I'm not sure I'm really that good a lover. I work at it with Mrs. Sailor. But honesty, two women? Shit, I would be lost. I don't know enough about one woman.

Basically, I'm a weird guy in that a threesome has never really been much of a fantasy for me. I'm really actually quite monogamous. And one at a time is where I shine. (see that ryhmed!)

There, now you've got a boring answer so all the awesome unicorns can tell their hot stories now.

 

[BongoGal]

05.03.23

Do you think you have what it takes to be...a third for another couple? Do threesomes interest you? Would you find it difficult to keep emotions out of it?

Could I do it? Yes, but only under the right circumstances. I was asked once, and I agreed to be that third wheel. It almost happened, but it collapsed into a sorry and stupid mess before anyone got naked. For a bunch of reasons, it was probably for the best that it never happened, but it still gnaws at me a bit. I don't hate the idea of threesomes, but I don't yearn for them, and I've never sought them out. Emotions? Hell no.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

05.03.23

Let's have a sexier question!

Do you think you have what it takes to be a unicorn? No, not the mythical beast but could you be a third for another couple? Do threesomes interest you? Would you find it difficult to keep emotions out of it? What parts would you find most appealing? Least appealing?

Feel free to share all your threesome experiences below

Dammit, I read the first part of this question and I thought you were going to tell us screwnicorning stories.

All right, let's break this down. Could I be the third for another couple? Doubtful. The only times I ever got close to a threesome was when I was in a couple and we approached someone else to be our third (never worked out). But I don't see a scenario where a F/F couple would ever see me and think, "Him. The flabby guy with the bad haircut and teriyaki sauce on his breath. That's the penis we want."

Do threesomes interest you?
Of course. I'd happily take part in a FFM threesome. I just don't see a realistic opportunity for that to happen. MFM threesomes do nothing for me at all. Sorry.

Would you find it difficult to keep emotions out of it?
Absolutely! I tell to fall madly in love with anyone who wants to touch my penis. The emotions would be unavoidable.

What parts would you find most appealing?
Do you want me to just send you the pornhub links?

Least appealing?
Emotional entanglements. Physical insecurities. Awkwardness and embarrassing sex moments increasing exponentially with more people.

No actual experiences to share, sadly. The two times I even somewhat came close were first, when an ex- and I propositioned a friend of hers. The three of us made out together a little bit, but she ended up getting overwhelmed. And second, that same ex- and a different friend jokingly propositioned me, but it wasn't until much later I found out they weren't entirely joking. Oh well.