ARCHIVAL DISCUSSION to 11-14-08

[Boxlicker101]

Rumps, you have piqued my curiosity. I have a story in the E/C category, which posted a year ago and has, to date, attracted only 4,047 views and 14 votes. Most of my stories get more than that in the first day. Those who have read it have not been unkind, and it is rated at 4.50 and I don't believe that included any one-bombs becsause it was never ranked highly enough to attract trolls.

The name is "I Call on Lorna" and that name is much like that of most of my first person stories. (I/ We) (do something to or with) (a woman) or (a woman) (does something to or with me). These are all part of my main first person sequence featuring George Boxlicker with a series of women. There isn't much of a plot and it is strictly stroke, like all of my stories.

Maybe you can let me know what is right or wrong with it.

This URL should take you to the story:

Edited to delete the URL. If you are curious, you can go to the story through "My Smut" below here.

 

[angelicminx]

I don't know which of my stories I want to be critiqued but I'll put one up. I basically know what is wrong with the ones already posted. I have a work in progress that has been to edit twice but I am still not quite satisfied with. I'll offer that one, if that's ok. It's a long one, I have 4 chapters finished. Let me know when and what I need to do please.

~Minx

 

[Pure]

Note to Angelic, (Box, read this too)
Welcome,

There is an information 'sticky' 'what's going on here', and the gist is that we swap:

Once you've offered two critiques you may, by posting a request [not the story] in this thread, join candidates for the queue to be critiqued.

{That applies to your case, Box. However we don't encourage seeking critiques on long posted stories where there is no intent to re-write. As it were, "I wonder what's wrong with it, just curious." Incidentally, saying your story is not popular with literotica folks, does not mean there's anything wrong with it.}

PM me if you have questions, or post here if you think the matter might be of interest to other newcomers and regulars.

 

[angelicminx]

Thanks for the welcome Pure!

The idea that I got from Rumple was to go ahead and join the queue. By the time I was up I would have my required 2 critiques. I have done one so far.

Is that wrong? Just let me know what else, if anything, I need to do. I will choose something shorter if need be.

 

[Pure]

Hi Angelic,

The idea that I got from Rumple was to go ahead and join the queue. By the time I was up I would have my required 2 critiques. I have done one so far.

Is that wrong? Just let me know what else, if anything, I need to do.

This is just semantics. If you post to the 'queue' thread, and have critiqued, you're in the pool of *potential* posters who sooner or later, will join the actual queue.

The actual 'queue' is composed of those cleared and assigned a date for such posting. It is something I try to sort out and direct, and the etiquette is that I give a go-ahead; I'm like the cop on the corner directing traffic. All drivers get their turn, but we want it to be orderly.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Note to Angelic, (Box, read this too)
Welcome,

There is an information 'sticky' 'what's going on here', and the gist is that we swap:

Once you've offered two critiques you may, by posting a request [not the story] in this thread, join candidates for the queue to be critiqued.

{That applies to your case, Box. However we don't encourage seeking critiques on long posted stories where there is no intent to re-write. As it were, "I wonder what's wrong with it, just curious." Incidentally, saying your story is not popular with literotica folks, does not mean there's anything wrong with it.}

PM me if you have questions, or post here if you think the matter might be of interest to other newcomers and regulars.

You're right that I would not actually rewrite the story. At most, I would correct some typos and make some changes so the story would flow more smoothly. No major changes. I have no objection to the opinions expressed in voting; I just wonder why it gets so few views. I have stories with similar names in the E/C category that get four or five times as many. I will be submitting a story later this week, named ("I Cum on Trisha/Tina). Right now, the name is Trisha but I might change it to Tina, if Trisha asks me to.

 

[wishfulthinking]

Hi guys,

I have a vampire story just about completed. I have been struggling with it for a while, because something just isn't working. Probably I'm trying to do too much with it, and may need help uncomplicating it.

Cheers, WT

 

[Pure]

wishful,


see the information thread, the sticky, 'how things are done around here"

[[Added by moderator Mar 6; discussions are proceeding with 'wishful' and we hope to have a story of hers up soon.

Welcome!]]

 

[Boxlicker101]

This is not a new story; it was actually posted on Feb. 15 in the Exhibitionist and Voyeur section. I didn't feel just right about that but it seemed to be the best place to post it.

[edited, portion deleted by moderator]

I am hoping to find out how I can improve on this story and others in the future with the same character.

[[Mr. B is referring to his story
Cindy Lou Moves to New York]]


Here is the URL:

[not correct; deleted by moderator]

[[Added by moderator. Please clarify your status here, and if you've critiqued, this story or another of your choice and become a selection. In the present case, the queue is at 0, so it could go up today.]]



__________________
My smut

 

[Pure]

Please clarify

Box,
Please let me know if you've participated in critiquing, lately. I dont know.

Unless you have, the posting of stories here or in their own thread is not exactly in accord with the procedure.

If you have, tell me the stories critiqued, and I will give the go ahead for today, and we will create an official thread.

----
Added 5:40 am 3-06.
Box, I have reviewed the discussions and find you participated. So please choose a story for critique. Choose what you consider to be one of your best efforts, would be my advice. Let me know when you are ready to proceed.

 

[Pure]

To Box,

You have the go ahead for this week 3-06, for the story mentioned.
I will PM you the details, but in short, you may to post the the story--or its url--here at the SDC in its own thread.

 

[Pure]

update

incidentally, friends, i've updated the 'what's happening here' (sticky thread) to emphasize positive parts of a 'critique' and encouragement and make the place seem more friendly.

 

[Black Tulip]

Can I suggest a small but terribly handy change of rules?

A message in this thread to announce the fact that a new story is up for discussion.

I do not always have the time to go surfing the board, but a message about a story to be critiqued would alert me to it as I'm subscribed to this one.

A simple "My turn" would be enough.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Can I suggest a small but terribly handy change of rules?

A message in this thread to announce the fact that a new story is up for discussion.

I do not always have the time to go surfing the board, but a message about a story to be critiqued would alert me to it as I'm subscribed to this one.

A simple "My turn" would be enough.

Hi, BT. Can't you just click on the forum and see any new threads listed? There really aren't that many. I would think that would be easier than Pure sending PMs to everybody who has critiqued stories or has expressed an interest in doing so.

 

[Black Tulip]

Hi, BT. Can't you just click on the forum and see any new threads listed? There really aren't that many. I would think that would be easier than Pure sending PMs to everybody who has critiqued stories or has expressed an interest in doing so.

He doesn't have to do that Box. Every time something is posted in this thread I get an automatic message from the Lit board. I do not take a look at Lit everyday, sometimes days go by and I only respond to messages like that if I respond at all.



Perhaps I'm a lazy bitch.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Perhaps I'm a lazy bitch.

Thank God you're a hot one.

(Hope you got a message alert for that one. )

 

[Black Tulip]

Hehehe.

 

[Pure]

believe it or not, i try to insure that there is a note from me and/or the selected author stating when a new story is up. perhaps there have been slipups or less than clear labels of postings (i.e., it's buried inside).

PS btw, now that I have the tyrannical powers of moderators, i'm able to move a thread out. so the irrelevant ones, or "I'm new, critique me" postings are not there for long, and the sequence and most recent items is much clearer in my opinion. No?

Factoid of the day: Actually threads are not destroyable by moderators, they are simply moved to the 'moderator's queue', which no ordinary mortal can see. However, were s/he (the original poster) to complain to the Grand Wizard, and give valid reasons, the thread might be re-instated!. Sorta like the 'trash can' icon, on the desktop.

 

[Black Tulip]

Pure,

Must have skimmed messages too quickly then.
And yes, you do a great job in moderating, or is that mothering?
The forum looks a lot better and less intimidating in my opinion.

 

[Pure]

So do we have a volunteer (from among those who've critiqued) for this Sun 3-13?

Perhaps someone whose creative juices are flowing too much, and who wishes to enjoy the blue funk and 'stuck-ness' some have reported--a kind of 'interior vacation.'

 

[angelicminx]

So do we have a volunteer (from among those who've critiqued) for this Sun 3-13?

Perhaps someone whose creative juices are flowing too much, and who wishes to enjoy the blue funk and 'stuck-ness' some have reported--a kind of 'interior vacation.'

I'll volunteer. I need some help. I'll put up a story that currently has no title and is still in the rough stages. Let me know.

~Minx

 

[Pure]

Hi Angelic,
I neglected to mention that 'wishful' is first in the queue. So you can proceed next Sun 3-20, OK?

 

[angelicminx]

Hi Angelic,
I neglected to mention that 'wishful' is first in the queue. So you can proceed next Sun 3-20, OK?

No problem, Pure. Looking forward to trying my hand at critique again. It seems to really help me figure out what I am doing when I try to write my own stories.

Thanks for the go ahead for next week!

 

[BlackShanglan]

Can I put a placeholder in to go after Minx? I've got an opening chunk of a longer work that will need some scrutiny. The chunk itself shouldn't be too long.

Shanglan

 

[Pure]

OK, horsie after minx. (sorry had to work Sun). Is minx up?