Awful PMs

[Connubium]

Got one this morning..

(Too bad we can't use names)


"Do you ever gag sucking cock?" "Have any of your partners ever made you deepthroat and choke?"


Seriously..some of these guys are pathetic

If he would have read my profile, he would have known i can't be "made" to do anything.

Gah, I hate that... the ones that have a demanding undertone. Twat .

 

[BradBigBrain]

who says i'm broken hearted? i've got a dog and i live in Hawaii. i'm living the good life here

Good points. Do you need a cabana boy? I'm sure if you do, the grammarian who wrote would love to fill the position.

 

[afriendg]

Thank you ! Thank you! All you witty, wonderful Litsters! I was just feeling a bit depressed over something unrelated, when I stumbled upon this thread..and I've been laughing for the past 10 minutes...dog spunk not withstanding...

 

[BradBigBrain]

Two, large,uninhibited men coming together, our whale like bodies rubbing against each other, combining your sweat and mine, I want to lick lard of your nipples and then kiss you so you can taste your nipple lard in my mouth.

Beat that one.

 

[Connubium]

Beat that one.

You said I was the best cyber you'd ever had

 

[BradBigBrain]

You said I was the best cyber you'd ever had

Well, I have to admit, I was turned on. But nipple lard does that to me.

 

[lothwen]

Beat that one.

I really don't want to

 

[Connubium]

Well, I have to admit, I was turned on. But nipple lard does that to me.

There is plenty more where that came from, it's easier now I know what you like...

 

[BiGuyMN]

I get some fantastic ones. I'd still feel a little mean posting them though

The dog one was funny


ETA the best are the ones accompanied by unannounced cock pics

I wasn't kidding about the Monkey and the banana!

 

[Holly1990]

I just got this:

'Could there be anything more perfect than you damn woman your fuckin sexy.'

...and I felt like it should be here

Aww, the best message in the world would be made redundant by lack of grammar. And punctuation. Also, this is nowhere near being the best message in the world.

 

[coachdb18]

The only thing in this thread that I find truly amazing is the number of people who flock to a porn site expecting an intellectually stimulating conversation.

 

[LimoAndPizza]

Aww, the best message in the world would be made redundant by lack of grammar. And punctuation. Also, this is nowhere near being the best message in the world.

i can't know what ur talking bout i think that a good mesage and got he point over goodly

 

[Holly1990]

The only thing in this thread that I find truly amazing is the number of people who flock to a porn site expecting an intellectually stimulating conversation.

Ah, but I have had intellectually (and sexually) stimulating conversation many times from this website, just not from these guys!

 

[Holly1990]

i can't know what ur talking bout i think that a good mesage and got he point over goodly

Hehehe

 

[MrsMellowCake]

This might be my favourite thread ever.

I get pretty good PMs, mostly. But upon declining one odd, badly worded request I simply got the following reply:

"Subject: Fuck...

Oh go on, you cunt."

Of course that instantly changed my mind and I was putty in his hands from then on.

 

[Holly1990]

This might be my favourite thread ever.

I get pretty good PMs, mostly. But upon declining one odd, badly worded request I simply got the following reply:

"Subject: Fuck...

Oh go on, you cunt."

Of course that instantly changed my mind and I was putty in his hands from then on.

HAHAHAHA! That's amazing! I know for sure I would never want to sleep with the woman who that line would work on. "Oh go on you cunt" "umm. Ok, yes, do me."

 

[Connubium]

I just got this:

'Could there be anything more perfect than you damn woman your fuckin sexy.'

...and I felt like it should be here

Aww, the best message in the world would be made redundant by lack of grammar. And punctuation. Also, this is nowhere near being the best message in the world.

I know what you mean! With correct grammar he could have said...

'Could there be anything more perfect than you?Damn woman, you're fucking sexy.'

oh wait...

I love how he put the full stop(period) at the end of the sentence,why did he even bother?

 

[lothwen]

This might be my favourite thread ever.

I get pretty good PMs, mostly. But upon declining one odd, badly worded request I simply got the following reply:

"Subject: Fuck...

Oh go on, you cunt."

Of course that instantly changed my mind and I was putty in his hands from then on.

Of course

The only thing in this thread that I find truly amazing is the number of people who flock to a porn site expecting an intellectually stimulating conversation

Do I expect Shakespeare? No, of course not, but I do expect something more creative than "Hey Im bored wanna cyber?"

 

[Connubium]

The only thing in this thread that I find truly amazing is the number of people who flock to a porn site expecting an intellectually stimulating conversation.

Haha! It doesn't have to be intellectually stimulating as long as I'm sucking your cock and not you're cock

I've actually been very pleasantly surprised by the amount of men who combine the two perfectly. If only there was a thread for, sexy, amazing, orgasm-worthy PM's

 

[Holly1990]

I just posted a new photo in my old photo thread and got 3 or 4 really nice compliment PM's (thankyou, very much appreciated!) and an equal number of 'hi im dan, 45, uk. wanna cam?' PM's.
Just try a bit harder chaps! Maybe tonight I do kinda feel like chatting with someone but still not going to do it unless someone interesting says hi. At least a really bad PM is funny

 

[elusive_buttrfly]

I guess my biggest pet peeve is with guys my father's age that should know better. They either pm me wanting to role play or chat dirty on yahoo. Some don't even ask to add me on yahoo they just assume it's their right!

 

[Chaingun]

How will you encourage these fine gentlemen to change their ways?

By posting their names.

I had a similar one telling me I could keep the dog, I thought that was thoughtful.

Not off the dog is spunking constantly.

Blech.

 

[Miles Long]

Are we still complaining about this?

 

[Holly1990]

Hey look, a nice one Thanks!

You were indeed correct with your pic post, the gentle sway of the girls are quite lovely today. Although I cant imagine they would look any less tomorrow or even yesterday... : ) Thank you for sharing your beautiful form.

I wish you a wonderful weekend.
cheers

I'm more inclined to reply to this than to the PM I got at the same time that simply read:

id love to suck those tits, do u 69? 28m fellow brit

 

[SmileyGirl]

Hit delete it's simple Then laugh at their lame attempt to woo you
Or try to get you on cam or for them to spank the monkey on cam take your pick haha