Cock Map

[Endless_Night]

I just heard a *thunk* on my window, maybe he was sending his dick out again?

Omg.

Dude.


Sooooooo, if you disappear mid post...that's what happened?

 

[hotwords229_A]

If I disappear mid post, you can assume that I . . .

 

[Endless_Night]

Now. If @Trekka will just here and give us readers a blow by blow of what she thinks is happening.

 

[LadyLascivious1]

Now. If @Trekka will just here and give us readers a blow by blow of what she thinks is happening.

It’s way past her bedtime

 

[Endless_Night]

It’s way past her bedtime

I know! But...seriously!

 

[Endless_Night]

Being a mite stressed, I search cryptid porn titles.

(You know, as I do. )


This popped up. Not exactly cryptid, but presumably aliens are close enough?

 

[Endless_Night]

Book 1 in the Billionaire Monster Alien Boss series.

(Not kidding. )


It’s a standalone porn/romance novel. (If you care about that sort of thing. )

And it has a 4.58 rating on Amazon!!

I...honestly don't know what to do with that.


Aha! Further reading indicates this bad boy has a plot. There ya go.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I like a lot of these titles.
They are perfectly beyond ridiculous.

But is being “tarnished” a sexy term?

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I like a lot of these titles.
They are perfectly beyond ridiculous.

But is being “tarnished” a sexy term?

It can be

 

[hotwords229_A]

It can be

Next time I have sex I’m going to ask if she wants to get Polished by my Porpoise, or Tarnished by my Testicles, and see how hot she gets.

 

[Photog1rl]

Next time I have sex I’m going to ask if she wants to get Polished by my Porpoise, or Tarnished by my Testicles, and see how hot she gets.

Who knows how hot you'll get her but I bet you will get points for alliteration.

 

[Mo_Bandy]

Cock map? My boner will lead you to the promised land.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

You'll tarnish my flawless complexion @hotwords229_A ?

 

[Endless_Night]

This one's for you, @hotwords229_A !

Ravaged by Godzilla's Offspring, by Miss Jezebel Rose.


You can even download the first 5% as a sample.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Okay, now this one goes too far. Even if Godzilla’s offspring has a micro-penis it still has to be the size of a garbage truck.

How?

 

[_MissLick_]

All I Want for Christmas is this Cock Map

 

[hotwords229_A]

All I Want for Christmas is this Cock Map

Feel free to grab one.

 

[Endless_Night]

Okay, now this one goes too far. Even if Godzilla’s offspring has a micro-penis it still has to be the size of a garbage truck.

How?

Remember the merman?

I think it's like that.

Cryptic magic.

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Feel free to grab one.

Grab one? Is he hiding a cartographic parchment down there? Otherwise she's going to be sorely disappointed. I would be

 

[hotwords229_A]

Grab one? Is he hiding a cartographic parchment down there? Otherwise she's going to be sorely disappointed. I would be

Nah, if she searches hard enough I’m sure she’ll forget what she was looking for in the first place.
Plus, what good is a map without something that points North?

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

What is this thread? A map to cocks?

 

[hotwords229_A]

What is this thread? A map to cocks?

Yes. 70 pages of cock related twists and turns.

If I were you, I’d read the first 10-20 pages. That’s where the really sexy stuff is.

 

[Endless_Night]

Supposedly, this is the average *last* time while watching porn per state. The times are remarkably unvaried. I looked because of, well, new porn law stuff I am apparently THE LAST to hear about in my state.

Weird how little varied the numbers are, right?

 

[Endless_Night]

Especially, when compared to the country version of the same map. China has stamina.

 

[Photog1rl]

I love that I totally forgot this thread existed. I saw the map and the title and thought what a fun thread. I started reading and...yep, I'd already seen it and posted in it. I think we need more cock and less maps…or can anyone draw a map with their cock??