Depression. It's a silent killer.

[Nightaelf]

Years ago, I went through a severe clinical depression. I had a lot of therapy sessions, antidepressants, and learned tools to cope with it. The depression still comes and goes, but most of the time I know how to handle it. I no longer feel like I would be better off dead or that no one would miss me. I’ve been working on my sense of self-worth and focusing on the things I can control. Writing has become a big part of that process for me.

Now I’ve fallen back into another depression, mostly because I’m on anti-hormone therapy due to cancer. It causes mood swings, which fuel the depression. The one thing I’m grateful for is that I can now recognize it for what it is, and I know when it’s time to ask for real help.

I already have an appointment with my psychiatrist on Monday to discuss medication.

 

[MrPimms]

Writing is good therapy.

 

[Nightaelf]

Writing is good therapy.

Yes, it is!

 

[Wetkitty09]

I have learned my markers and triggers over time as well. Being aware of how I’m feeling at any time helps to keep the fall from being too far.
Knowing what helps to bring me back is important too. Because we all fall, no matter how well we care for ourselves. Life doesn’t pull punches. Being resilient is a learning process that is hard but so worth it.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[write_or_wrong]

Years ago, I went through a severe clinical depression. I had a lot of therapy sessions, antidepressants, and learned tools to cope with it. The depression still comes and goes, but most of the time I know how to handle it. I no longer feel like I would be better off dead or that no one would miss me. I’ve been working on my sense of self-worth and focusing on the things I can control. Writing has become a big part of that process for me.

Now I’ve fallen back into another depression, mostly because I’m on anti-hormone therapy due to cancer. It causes mood swings, which fuel the depression. The one thing I’m grateful for is that I can now recognize it for what it is, and I know when it’s time to ask for real help.

I already have an appointment with my psychiatrist on Monday to discuss medication.

I hope Monday helps. Wishing you all the best.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Labor Day. Summers officially over. I’m not happy to see it go but time moves. Fall is a beautiful season and a lesson in contrast.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[bws1]

Labor Day. Summers officially over. I’m not happy to see it go but time moves. Fall is a beautiful season and a lesson in contrast.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

While I love fall, it feels like summer started about 2 weeks ago and now it's over. So not fair.

 

[Pad_Foot]

I don’t deserve to be depressed
When Lit has more troubles than fun, you should take a break

I guess I need a break

I wish that was not true

 

[Nightaelf]

Labor Day. Summers officially over. I’m not happy to see it go but time moves. Fall is a beautiful season and a lesson in contrast.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

I’m an autumn child, born on the edge of summer. I want to feel grounded, yet most of the time I drift, never really belonging, always looking for a place. And just when I think I’ve landed, the ground shifts again.

Labor Day feels like that leaf as well, originally from America, once meant for May 1st, blown across the world and embraced, then skipping the very place it came from and ending up in September instead.

 

[Wetkitty09]

I don’t deserve to be depressed
When Lit has more troubles than fun, you should take a break

I guess I need a break

I wish that was not true

We deserve to feel the way we feel without being judged by others who don’t know what we go through.

If Lit is being a bitch then by all means take a break. Just don’t forget some of us want you to succeed in the way that makes you feel successful.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Back home and hanging out with the AC today. Too hot to do anything.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Beholders_Eye]

 

[athelticguy04]

Seems like it's become so much harder to make friends with women both for real and here on lit. I put the effort out only for constant rejections. Lit has become full of people who say hi then disappear from you and don't put much effort into trying to build a conversation to make a new friend

 

[Nightaelf]

Seems like it's become so much harder to make friends with women both for real and here on lit. I put the effort out only for constant rejections. Lit has become full of people who say hi then disappear from you and don't put much effort into trying to build a conversation to make a new friend

Do you do that in this chat about depression? Then maybe it’s not so strange. Or do you mean on the forum in general?

 

[Wetkitty09]

Well. Another turn of the sun is here. I hope you have the best day you can.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[athelticguy04]

Do you do that in this chat about depression? Then maybe it’s not so strange. Or do you mean on the forum in general?

Just in general. Guess it's just my depression fueled rant about life.this is a great thread

 

[razor33a]

Just in general. Guess it's just my depression fueled rant about life.this is a great thread

I feel the same. Conversations are more snippets than before. Actual forums like lit are the only form that seems to handle longer interactions. Dealing with depression just makes it worse, like a really stinky hit sauce.

 

[GoNorth2Camp]

Morning. Nearly all packed for my trip on Friday. I’m anxious to get going, you think?

Have the best day you can.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

Hope you have a great trip! Where are you headed?

 

[GoNorth2Camp]

Morning. Solitude is a killer. I know this. When I start to spiral I know I have to get out and find someone to be around, preferably doing some kind of work to improve something.
Whether I do or not makes a difference on how bad it’s going to get.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

I don’t know about your living situation. I am currently going through a divorce. My children (both of which are older) went with my wife. I have found being in the backyard and working on a garden, working on projects around the house, keeping my hands busy… Not just with my penis, lol, but trying to accomplish at least one thing in my day really helps.

 

[Nightaelf]

In itself I do understand that people, in general, want meaningful conversations. But what I know from depression and being depressed is that I am often not the most fun person to talk to. You want deep, opinionated, meaningful conversations, yet if I look at myself it’s often that I’m too much in my own head and really just need to vent.

I’ve noticed, and this isn’t even about member-to-member interaction, but also just with my friends, that while people may want too deeply interact in theory, in practice they can’t always handle the weight of my depression. And I don’t blame them for it.

Maybe seeking connection on a forum, with the expectation of more than a few sentences back and forth, isn’t actually the right way to look for it. I don’t mean that in a dismissive way. I just mean that sometimes our own expectations create the very gap we end up falling into.

I feel the same. Conversations are more snippets than before. Actual forums like lit are the only form that seems to handle longer interactions. Dealing with depression just makes it worse, like a really stinky hit sauce.

 

[Nightaelf]

Btw.... I turned 50 today.....

 

[bellagio11]

Happy Birthday!!!

Btw.... I turned 50 today.....

 

[GoNorth2Camp]

Btw.... I turned 50 today.....

Happy birthday! There’s two ways to look at that… The more realistic way, it’s just a number. I’m gonna be 60 in 7 1/2 months. Enjoy it! It doesn’t have to be all bad.

 

[Nightaelf]

Happy birthday! There’s two ways to look at that… The more realistic way, it’s just a number. I’m gonna be 60 in 7 1/2 months. Enjoy it! It doesn’t have to be all bad.

It’s not a bad thing. It’s a milestone I didn’t think I would reach last year. And even though I still don’t know for sure whether I’ve beaten cancer, I’ve already won several battles along the way. The depression is an unpleasant side effect, this time caused more by Tamoxifen (anti-hormone therapy) than by anything else. On Monday I’ll start with antidepressants.

 

[questquilya]

Btw.... I turned 50 today.....

Happy birthday!