Hardcore porn for women

[Black Tulip]

What dictionary did you guys look in?

[color=royal blue]Merriam-Webster online:

One entry found for slut.

Main Entry: slut
1 chiefly British : a slovenly woman
2 a : a promiscuous woman; especially : PROSTITUTE b : a saucy girl : MINX[/color]

I agree it's high time to change the negative meaning.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Dictionaries

The firsst one was the New Websters Encyclopedic Dictionary of the English Language and it was copyrrite 1971. The Funk Wagnals Standard Desk Dictionary, 1986 Edition ays: (1) A slatternly woman. (2) A woman of loose character; hussy. (3) A female dog. The Random House Webster's College Dictionary Copyright 1991 says (1) A dirty slovenly woman. (2) A sexually immoral woman, a prostitute.

Personally, I think of the word as highly pejorative so I never use it unless a character is cursing and reviling the woman as part of the sex play or a woman is referring to herself or asking an opinion of herself.

 

[Boxlicker101]

b : a saucy girl : MINX

Black tulip found this meaning, which is the one Perdita and others have been using. Unfortunately, that same meaning says in full: " 2 a : a promiscuous woman; especially : PROSTITUTE b : a saucy girl : MINX".

Besides my characters never using the word unless under special circumstances, I never say or write the word, unless I am giving a definition like I have been here.

 

[bridgeburner]

Boxlicker,

In the long overdue interests of not derailing this thread with an off-topic discussion I'll wait until Monday to respond to your last post and do so in an appropriate thread.


-B

 

[bridgeburner]

Sorry SnP

My apologies to SweetNPetite for thread derailment. Next time just clobber me one. ;->


-B

 

[SlickTony]

The thing to do with the term slut is to overuse it until you've bled out its negative connotations, i.e., shoe slut (any woman who has more than size 10 feet, if she sees a good looking pair of shoes, is going to feel obliged to buy them) or "attention slut," which if you have a cat or dog with certain personality traits, just about explains itself.

 

[sweetnpetite]

wow, where do I start?

This thread is very interesting, including the 'off topic' topic of what makes a woman a slut. Go ahead and discuss it on my thread

It may be true that women are the primary enforcers of what a slut is, but trust me, men do there share as well. Yes woman do worry about being respected by men (for myself, on the one hand I'm not looking for 'respect' but on the other, I don't want to be *disrespected*) Yes, men do use the term slut disrespectfully, and they do use it to keep women in there place. I don't believe that men want to be one of the many men that a woman sleeps with- they want to be the *only* one each and every time. Men are just as disrespectful to women who sleep with lots of men and who also sleep with them- but they still sleep with them, because who's gonna pass on a sure thing?- plus, if she's doing it with everybody *but* you, that somehow says something very negative about you -- in particullarly it might call into question your manhood. The fact that men will sleep with 'slutty' women, does not imply that they are more accepting of the behavior.

The double standard is very much still around. *Maybe* we exagerate it somewhat to make a point, but it's still very much there. Being called a slut won't neccesarily ruin your life or get you expelled from your community- (although in some places it still might) but it's still has a stigma that being called a male slut, giggalo, or stud does not. The definition that says a slut is a promiscuous woman obviously begs many questions. What do we call a promiscuius man? (come on seriously- have you ever really heard of a man being refered to as promiscuos in serious conversation?) and what is permiscuous.

The reality is, the dictionary definition matters very little. Meaning is found in use. I have heard men refer to females as sluts (in a disrespectful way) for all sorts of reasons- the way she dresses, enjoying sex, sleeping with two men over the course of one year, having sex before marriage, even being to flirty. Its the kind of word that is used as a negative lable, and it doenst matter if you fit the definition- many woman will do anything to avoid being slapped with it. Some might even say- if you have any reason to wonder if she's a slut- she is.

I'm all for taking the word back, but in reality for a long time, this is only going to confuse the issue. (kinda like the N-word- men will be saying, if women can call themselves sluts and bitches why can't I?)

I have sooooo much to say on this topic!!! but I've got to go right now. It may seem in our politically correct world, that there is no longer a double standard- but that is infanitly untrue.

 

[SlickTony]

What do we call a promiscuius man? (come on seriously- have you ever really heard of a man being refered to as promiscuos in serious conversation?) and what is permiscuous.

A dog. I work for a legal publication and lots of court documents pass through my hands although we don't type up every one we see, otherwise our paper would be too big to read. I've seen where some guy has child support orders taken out against them by several different women. He's a dog.

 

[Boxlicker101]

What do we call promiscuous men?

Yes, men are sometimes described as promiscuous. Promiscuous gay men are sometimes called sluts, but I am assuming this is about straight men. Straight men who are promiscuous are called Don Juans, Casanovas, Romeos, womanizers, chasers or chippy chasers (which is as much a putdown for the women they are chasing as it is for the men) or wolves. Calling a man by one of these names is about the same as calling a woman a slut because it says that the man is seeking to have sex with a large number of women. Sexual predator is also used but this usually means a rapist or pedophile. "Stud" is actually a compliment, meaning a man who is sexually adept. By extension, this could also be a man who has had sex with many women. Other men envy a man who can be called a stud but women usually scorn him, referring to him as "Old love "em and Leave 'em" or saying things like "I don't want to be another notch on your gun" or words to that effect. Most men, on the other hand, have no objection to being one of many notches on a woman's gun. This the difference between male and female attitudes toward casual sex.

Many women, not the ones who are members of literotica, but most other women, are extremely scornful of women they perceive of as being promiscuous, and probably insult them more than men do.

 

[sweetnpetite]

Re: What do we call promiscuous men?

. Straight men who are promiscuous are called Don Juans, Casanovas, Romeos, womanizers, chasers or chippy chasers (which is as much a putdown for the women they are chasing as it is for the men) or wolves. Calling a man by one of these names is about the same as calling a woman a slut because it says that the man is seeking to have sex with a large number of women.

Pu-Leese! none of thse names are even close to equivalent to "slut" (my boyfriend agrees with this) and there is little or no stigma attahed to a (straight) man who "is seeking to have sex with a large number of women." In fact, it is often seen as the overwealming biological drive of men to try to impegate as many women as possible. Science is often brought out here to say that this is an inherint drive that insures the propagation of the species.

Often it is considered a given that a man is "sowing his seeds" before settleing down, whereas a woman of course is expected to "respect herself" which means not having ramdom sex or 'too many" sex partners. IN this day and age, a woman is not expected to be a virgin when she marries, but if you tell the man you with that you've been with anything more than 5 men- it's not going to go over well. (with the rare exception.) Even five may be too many, even for a guy who's slept with 50 or more women (and often especially with a man like that, because he' s more likely to have a 'traditional' idea of what men and women are supposed to be like sexually.)

Notice that even when women call *themselves* a slut, it will come with a lot of qualifiers. "I'm a slut, but not in *this* way." women who are not as bold as many litizens are just as likely to say, "I'm not a slut, but-" If there was no stigma, there would be no qualifiers.

Calling a man a dog doesnt' cut it either. I know plenty of men who are quite proud to be 'dogs'

Rationalize all you want. There is no true equivelent for a straight male.

The fact that woman are just as hard or harder on other women than men are only supports the fact. Its peer aproval that matters most in enforcement of social norms. Women may look down on men who are "wolves" but the fact that there buddies congratulate them on their behavior is the determining factor in their behavior- not weather or not women (or the friend of the court or Pat Robertson) approves.

Other women become the enforcers, but that doesn't make it any less of a chauvanistic social policy. I won't go into the sociolgy of it any more than that because this post is already long enough, and I realy think that anyone should be able to see the truth of this unlesst they are trying hard not to. IMO.

 

[Guest]

S&P: yours is my opinion too. Thanks for saving me the time of writing. Just to be clear, Perdita believes there is no eqiuvalent of slut for straight males. In Spanish if you call a man a slut you're calling him a fag.

Perdita

 

[Dirty Slut]

Here's a suggestion, that might need a whole new thread...

S&P: yours is my opinion too. Thanks for saving me the time of writing. Just to be clear, Perdita believes there is no eqiuvalent of slut for straight males. In Spanish if you call a man a slut you're calling him a fag.

Perdita

I agree with you both, obviously. Maybe the thing we need to do here is come up with a name for men that is equally befiting for them as they think slut is for us. The English have a saying: "You're a bit of a queer duck, aren't you?" I vote that we call them queer ducks. Sounds evilly vile, and with the queer part added to it men would really get pissed off. LOL Even shortening it to Duckie vilifies it to the status of sissyish. And men hate that too.

DS

 

[Mhari]

Well...is there something wrong with "man-slut"?

Or is that something only used hereabouts?

It's kinda like "mimbo". *grin*

 

[sweetnpetite]

Well...is there something wrong with "man-slut"?

Or is that something only used hereabouts?

It's kinda like "mimbo". *grin*

Uh- yes.

They sound like a badge of honor.

Duckie, now that's funny though

I also like 'boy' They don't like that

(there's a song with a line, "I need a man- not a boy who thinks he can" that's a pretty good one for a guy who seems to think that quantity is quality)

 

[Black Tulip]

Re: What do we call promiscuous men?

Most men, on the other hand, have no objection to being one of many notches on a woman's gun. This the difference between male and female attitudes toward casual sex.

Sorry, I do hope you were not serious.

SNP: you're absolutely right.

Perdita: the same goes for Dutch, you can call a man a slut, but that automatically implies his homosexuality.

In other words, a gay man can display feminine behavior, meaning sluttish.
Need I say more?

 

[Dirty Slut]

What's wrong with Man Slut???

Well...is there something wrong with "man-slut"?

Or is that something only used hereabouts?

It's kinda like "mimbo". *grin*

Since the whole idea of finding a word that would be as bad sounding to men as Slut is to women, I think man-slut is negated automatically. As are any names that raise the status of this type of male.

DS

 

[Guest]

There's the rub, DS. No matter the circumstances (loneliness, neurosis, pathology), it's a status for straight males, and not for women. Perhaps in time 'slut' will lose its negative significance in the mainstream, other than that I don't believe there can be an equal term for men.

Perdita

 

[OldnotDead]

I never realized how incredibly negative this term was until I almost lost a friend over using the word. I have been known to tell people that I am just a cheap slut and thought that the term had become less intense for women as well. Was I ever wrong!

I think the use of the word and connotation is something women maintain from an early age. When sex is still not a given, younger girls use the term to describe those who prey on boys, attracting them away from the girls that do not 'put out'. I think it fixes the term in their minds for pretty much the rest of their lives and will always have connotations of a predator that uses the weakest of man's behavior to their own personal advantage at the expense of another woman.

As another friend once put it to me, "Men are so easy. All you are ever thinking about is someplace warm to put it." So I guess since we are all, by definition, sluts, any woman that drops down to our level gets called one by other women.

 

[sweetnpetite]

As another friend once put it to me, "Men are so easy. All you are ever thinking about is someplace warm to put it." So I guess since we are all, by definition, sluts, any woman that drops down to our level gets called one by other women.

Exactly, an 'easy man' is redundant. That's why my definition of a slut will always be, "a woman who acts like a man"

also notice that when used to refer to women, 'competative' nearly always has a negative meaning. Think of the 'negative' things opponents of Hillary Rodham say about her ambition and so forth- if applied to a man, all would be compliments.

a forceful woman who knows what she wants, goes after it and doens't take any shit is generally called a bitch. A woman who dosn't smile all the time will also probably be called a bitch. So for that reason I will always define a bitch as "a woman who acts like a man"

Some misconseptions: Men have mood swings too. IN fact, they have a daily cycle rather than a monthy one, so they are in fact more 'emotionally unstable' than women. Men do not think rationally with there brains any more than women do. I know a lot of men who are fond of saying that women think with there hearts while men think with there brains. If it's fair to say that women think with their hearts, then it's just as true that men think with their groin and their stomach. The fact is *most* people male or female make decisions with other criteria than just rational objective intellect. And personally I think that is all for the better. We are not computers or Volcan's after all

 

[Boxlicker101]

Sluts etc.

I totally agree that there is no true male equivalent to "slut" when used to describe a promiscuous woman. I don't think anybody ever uses it to mean anything else. The names I listed before are similar but don't carry the same sting. I never use the word, since I avoid calling people names. For the same reason, I don't say "fag" or "queer" because those are insulting names for gay men.

A Queer duck" is an eccentric, and has nothing to do with sexual preference.

"Duck" or "Ducky" are normal nicknames, usually of men, and carry no sting.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Boxlicker101
Most men, on the other hand, have no objection to being one of many notches on a woman's gun. This the difference between male and female attitudes toward casual sex

I said that earlier and I meant it. I said MOST men; I did not say ALL men. MOST men see nothing wrong with promicsuity, either of men or women, and are envious of other men who have sex with a lot of women, and, to a lesser degree, with women who have sex with a lot of men.

Men are NOT expected to sow their wild seeds (or oats, as the expression is usually given). Impregnating women outside of a relationship, which is what the expression means, is unacceptable, especially if the man shirks his responsibilities.

 

[Dirt Man]

Is there a difference between male, and female porn?

Forgive me for asking, but I've been away for quite some time.

As Always
I Am the
Dirt Man

 

[Boxlicker101]

Male and female porn.

Some porn involves the rape or general degredation of women, and that is aimed at men. Personally, I dislike that kind of thing, and I think most men do also. I never write anything like that except when it is a role-playing story, and I always emphasize that it is role-playing. I try to aim my stories at women and I have gotten some very complimentary feedback from women telling me how much they like my stories, and they use their fingers or a dildo or a vibrator to get off on them. Some women, especially those who have been posting on this thread may not believe that but it's true.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Male and female porn.

Some porn involves the rape or general degredation of women, and that is aimed at men. Personally, I dislike that kind of thing, and I think most men do also. I never write anything like that except when it is a role-playing story, and I always emphasize that it is role-playing. I try to aim my stories at women and I have gotten some very complimentary feedback from women telling me how much they like my stories, and they use their fingers or a dildo or a vibrator to get off on them. Some women, especially those who have been posting on this thread may not believe it that but it's true.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Male and female porn.

Some porn involves the rape or general degredation of women, and that is aimed at men. Personally, I dislike that kind of thing, and I think most men do also. I never write anything like that except when it is a role-playing story, and I always emphasize that it is role-playing. I try to aim my stories at women and I have gotten some very complimentary feedback from women telling me how much they like my stories, and they use their fingers or a dildo or a vibrator to get off on them. Some women, especially those who have been posting on this thread may not believe it that but it's true.

 

[herecomestherain]

Friends I've enjoyed reading this thread and discussion very much. I too am thinking of starting a site reviewing porn films from a woman's point of view. I've got a list of personal favourites. I've spent the last few weeks trawling through review sites and keep coming back to my old favourite book, The Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos by Violet Blue. I've bought and watched a number of great hardcore adult movies recommended by Violet and her reviews are spot on.

There are also a number of women reviewers writing great review material on the net, I find it useful to check a number of reviews for a film to get a real feeling for it before I spend my dollars.

I've got much to say on this topic and can tend to be a blabber mouth so I'll leave it at that for now!