How to handle being ugly

[redfunguy]

beat someone else with a stick till they are uglier than you
there you go
problem fixed




next please....

 

[Phoenix Stone]

beat someone else with a stick till they are uglier than you
there you go
problem fixed




next please....

Nope. Only work if you beat Everyone else with a stick until they are uglier than you are -- but thank you for playing. Next?

 

[Big Bair]

maybe I am

 

[thrity]

The entire human world cannot be beautiful, yet we know that only the beautiful are valued in the world. How can an ugly person (man here, but gender-neutral) hope to find happiness?

Those with a "get a big wallet" idea need not reply - that is hardly a revolutionary insight into the (esp female) mind.

Learn more, such like reading can beaufify a person.
From my experiences, someone can be more and more ugly in my eyes if s/he is boring, someone can be more and more beautiful if s/he is interesting person.

 

[bertrande]

I am sure that it has been said before - probably even on this thread.

Beauty (or ugly) comes from within. A beautiful person with a frown or scowl on their face is ugly in my book. A laugh, a smile, a sense of humour, and a little cheekiness goes a long way.


I have been involved with someone who probably thinks that they are ugly....And sure they don't look like they did when they were younger....they have less hair and more weight than in there youth and glasses. To me this person is one of the most beautiful people I know.

When he smiled at me I used to melt. I knew what was inside, really inside and that is all that matters to me.

 

[coffee nips]

The entire human world cannot be beautiful, yet we know that only the beautiful are valued in the world. How can an ugly person (man here, but gender-neutral) hope to find happiness?

Those with a "get a big wallet" idea need not reply - that is hardly a revolutionary insight into the (esp female) mind.

This topic hits a sensitive nerve with me. I am a 'voluptuous' woman and rather socially shy. My entire life I have been told I was ugly, unattractive and will never find a man. Sad thing is that so far, this has been the truth. A self-fullfilling profecy of sorts.

I am a nice person with a good personality (at least I think so) but, I shy away from men/relationships because the few that I have had experience with were interested in me because they thought I would be an easy lay. Which, btw I am not. I am educated, have a good job and do my best to dress nice and accent the "positives" that I do have. I always figured it would be easy to 'meet' someone after I got done with college. Boy, was I ever wrong!

I agree with much of the advice on here about how to deal with your self image, ie dressing nice, having good hygeine, good attitude, educating yourself, take up a hobby.......

Sometimes I get really down on myself and my predicament. I don't really know what to do with myself anymore.

This really isn't a question....just an expression of how I feel.

 

[boston_bbw]

Coffee Nips I hear your pain and am in the same boat. It isn't the end of the world although can feel like it some times... Lonley is far from fun.. Hang in there

 

[Lynxie]

I can sympathize as well, Coffee. But know that there are men out there who appreciate us voluptuous women. Not everyone is so shallow, and someday the right person will come along who will recognize your beauty and intelligence. Hang in there and don't give up hope.

 

[zerimar1231]

What's ugly? Do you have a good personality? Funny? Good listener? Honest? Adventerous? Able to give good advise? Good hearted? THAT'S BEAUTIFUL. Not some dumbass looking model that's too busy looking at himself in the mirror to truly know what's important in the world. Screw what the world thinks as beautiful. If you are a good person then you will be taken cared of by a wonderful person who will love you for you. You have to love yourself bc otherwise how will you love someone else? See i like you already, now stop being sad and go out and have fun. Don't waste time being sad bc when you're 80 you're gonna hate having wasted your younger days

 

[mikeofokc]

Its easy to handle being ugly. Just make sure you stay in the shower long enough for the mirrors to fog over. Works for me.

Frankly low self esteem or being fake are characterisics I consider unattractive. I can get past the wrinkles, zits, fat rolls, anerexic, bald, or even bearded ladies but I cant get past whats in her head.

As for me I dont worry about my looks, ok maybe a little about why my shower drain has more hair on it than my head some days. But why worry about it. Why be fake. Doesent matter, be like me, stand in front of a mirror and get everyons attention somehow. Look at yourself, use your hands to straiten your hair slightly and proclaim that " I cant wait for tomorrow................I get better looking everyday."

 

[coffee nips]

I can sympathize as well, Coffee. But know that there are men out there who appreciate us voluptuous women. Not everyone is so shallow, and someday the right person will come along who will recognize your beauty and intelligence. Hang in there and don't give up hope.

Thanks Lynxie. Problem is, I don't even give guys a chance. I am so used to being made fun of; I think that anyone would EVER be interested in me. I know I shouldn't think that way, but after a lifetime of it, it is difficult to break the habit.

About the mirrors-I avoid them. It is bad enough there is a huge one in the bathroom right when I get out of the shower, steam or no steam, I still see me, ugh!!

 

[NYSubGrpplr]

Like Napoleon Dynamite said you need to have skills to get girls.

My face aint the greatest thing around but I've worked on other things to compensate.

A good sense of humor is key.

 

[Kingterp]

If your ugly your ugly and there is nothing you can do about it but go on with your life. If your ugly you can get hot women for your self but first you have to love your self before anyone else will Loveing your self is the hard part

 

[Felix_Jones]

I guess the first thing that you have to consider while having less than stellar looks is to accept more rejection. That is, if you're pursuing a relationship. Both women and men (generally) respond more acceptingly, positively, etc. to those who are good looking.
Second, probably you'll have to lower you're own standard of perfection. From what I've seen, all things being equal (i.e. you're not rich) people with generally the same level of attractiveness gravitate towards each other.
Last, you can always pay for it. There are hordes of extremely attractive escorts who will spend time with you.

 

[welkin]

I don't get the "you can be ugly and still get hot women" spiel. If looks are superficial and it's the personality that counts, shouldn't it be "you can be ugly and still get nice women"?!

 

[wicked woman]

hhhmmm I miss some of the oldies that posted on this but don't any more.

 

[CurvAppeal]

For a person to be ugly to me, they gotta have a shitty personality. Nothing is more ugly than a crappy personality. Looks don't bother me. If you have an amazing personality I'll talk to ya.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

It's all about confidence and realising different things attract different people.

I was told once that I fell out the ugly tree and landed on the trampoline down the bottom. Didn't really worry me overly, for someone to have an attitude like that...well that makes them ugly in my eyes.

 

[xhardchick]

First, I don't believe that anyone's ugly. Everyone has different criterias in the definition of beauty. Try not to stay that much to the appearance, but to the inside. It's not cliche as you may think! Women respect a man with sense of humor, who cares about them. Even though, there are some swallow girls that crave for a man's wallet. That's true. Try to be as realistic as you can. You don't want a swallow person, do you? (even if she's drop-dead gorgeous.) And last but not least, don't let anyone make you feel bad of what you are. Haters gonna hate, always

 

[hellsgate]

I don't mean to mock you with my reply, but there's no reason why being homely should be a problem.

Have you seen some the guys / women on "Jerry Springer" and "Maury"?

Develop an interest in hookers. Once you've had a blowjob or two, you'll appear calmer, more grounded / sane to a prospective booty-call or girlfriend / fiancee.

Go to back to school, learn a trade (medical receptionist or whatever), turn away from focusing so intensely on relationships for a while, read a book, sign-up for volunteer work through your local food exchange for low-income singles + families, go develop some likes / dislikes of your own.

Women like it when you've got something more going on in your life than clingy neediness & "I dunno" as a response to almost every question thrown at you.

 

[Cattypuss]

I don't get the "you can be ugly and still get hot women" spiel. If looks are superficial and it's the personality that counts, shouldn't it be "you can be ugly and still get nice women"?!

 

[Dr_O]

Confidence + knowing the right thing ==> physical appearance almost irrelevant, at least for a man.

As Voltaire (supposedly) said, "Give me five minutes to explain away my ugly face, and I will bed the queen of France."

Now the queen of France at the time was a brazen harlot, but that's really not relevant to the point.

 

[satindesire]

Damn this is an old thread!

 

[billrichards41]

Never thought I was ugly or overly handsome... Though I have heard both comments before so not sure which one to believe. Don't really think that it would be that flattering or hurtful anyway.

 

[culloden]

The most beautiful people are those who are comfortable with themselves. There's a certain je ne sais quois about someone who doesn't need external validation. I'm not sure how to get that. Some people always have it, others learn it through experience.