If You Met The Litster Above You In a Dark Alley, WWYD?

[Smoothshavendad]

Ask if he’d help with the lawnscaping.

Help her with the lawnscaping

 

[77706guy]

Ask if her “landscaping” is as nice as I imagine

 

[Polranny]

Tell him to look for a capability brown template

 

[Bellissa]

Extinguish his fire...

 

[Lavalancer]

Wet my pants

 

[Handsonyou]

Wet my pants

Step clear of the puddle.

 

[Taegul]

Break his thumbs

Well that's awkwardly violent...

Step clear of the puddle.

World disco dance-off championships.

 

[Polranny]

Wonder what he/she looks like

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Pull out a couple of cigars, offer him one and ask for a light. Ya gotta keep Dragons happy.

 

[VoraciousValue]

Pull out a couple of cigars, offer him one and ask for a light. Ya gotta keep Dragons happy.

Help him plot Canadian world domination.

 

[Polranny]

Light his cigar of course!

 

[EmpressJosephine]

Light his cigar of course!

Pet his dragon.

 

[MrEd63]

Escort her to safety

 

[Deprived_in_AZ]

Escort her to safety

Made lewd suggestions about stirring banana into creamy pudding....

 

[MrEd63]

Made lewd suggestions about stirring banana into creamy pudding....

Stir her creamy pudding with my banana

 

[Polranny]

Tread carefully, banana skins are slippery but the flesh is good with melted chocolate. (Exhaling)

 

[ExiledWelshman]

Tread carefully, banana skins are slippery but the flesh is good with melted chocolate. (Exhaling)

Ask if he is interested in starting a male voice choir.

 

[Tallulah82]

Ask if he is interested in starting a male voice choir.

Smack his arse and drag him to the nearest bar to get shit-faced together.

 

[ExiledWelshman]

Smack his arse and drag him to the nearest bar to get shit-faced together.

I bet you could drink me under the table.

 

[Tallulah82]

I bet you could drink me under the table.

Haha! Not any more, I'm well out of practice - 3 drinks and I'll be flat out. But oh, those 3 drinks... anything can happen during 3 drinks.

 

[ExiledWelshman]

Haha! Not any more, I'm well out of practice - 3 drinks and I'll be flat out. But oh, those 3 drinks... anything can happen during 3 drinks.

Here's what could happen during those three drinks:

You could dance on the bar
I could get into an argument with whatever bellend is putting shit music on the jukebox (it has happened more than once IRL)
The landlord could realise you were barred for a previous indiscretion and kick you out

 

[Tallulah82]

Here's what could happen during those three drinks:

You could dance on the bar
I could get into an argument with whatever bellend is putting shit music on the jukebox (it has happened more than once IRL)
The landlord could realise you were barred for a previous indiscretion and kick you out

Firstly, *I* put that shit music on the jukebox. I like shit music, thank you very much! I don't have a stick up my arse about "good music"

Secondly, I gave the landlord AND his son a blowy after last time. He promised me we were good. I can stay.

 

[MrEd63]

Haha! Not any more, I'm well out of practice - 3 drinks and I'll be flat out. But oh, those 3 drinks... anything can happen during 3 drinks.

Lightweight.

 

[ExiledWelshman]

Firstly, *I* put that shit music on the jukebox. I like shit music, thank you very much! I don't have a stick up my arse about "good music"

Secondly, I gave the landlord AND his son a blowy after last time. He promised me we were good. I can stay.

I DIDN'T give either of them a blowy. Does that mean I have to leave?

And I bet your music is shite (but then I think most people's taste in music is shite, so it shouldn't be taken personally).

 

[done_got_old]

Lightweight.

I'd be glad it's not the Boston strangler.