Iran's Next: You Heard It Here First

[Beco]

Did we invade yet??

 

[SeaCat]

I'm not willing to wait. I think we should impose a leader until the voters get with the program. Like we do here in Florida.

Love the AV, by the way. I thought cats didn't like to get wet?

"Snort"
I'm not sure how to take this. If your being serious, then isn't that kind of like what we're doing in some other, let's-leave-them-un-named-countries?

If you're being a wise ass like I usually am, then hmmmmm. Does Bush have another family member we can impose on them? (I suppose we could always subject them to the leadership of Rush Limbauhg, they would soon give up.)

As for cats not liking to get wet, wellllllllll, there are cats, and then there are CATS.

Cat

 

[shereads]

"Snort"
I'm not sure how to take this. If your being serious, then isn't that kind of like what we're doing in some other, let's-leave-them-un-named-countries?

If you're being a wise ass like I usually am, then hmmmmm. Does Bush have another family member we can impose on them?

Neil hasn't been heard from since...Now that I think of it, Neil Bush disappeared about the same time Dubya's college coke dealer vanished. And the other members of the cheerleading squad. I suspect that Barbara is keeping them in a basement compound someplace.

Am I serious about Freedom and Democracy and bringing the Gift of Liberty to the third world? Gosh, yes. Serious as a heart attack. Aren't you?

 

[SeaCat]

Neil hasn't been heard from since...Now that I think of it, Neil Bush disappeared about the same time Dubya's college coke dealer vanished. And the other members of the cheerleading squad. I suspect that Barbara is keeping them in a basement compound someplace.

Am I serious about Freedom and Democracy and bringing the Gift of Liberty to the third world? Gosh, yes. Serious as a heart attack. Aren't you?

Maybe Barbara is just saving them for this type of thing?

My views on bringing democracy and the gift of liberty to the third world nations is kind of hard to understand at times. (Although I think you know that, we've talked about it a time or three. )

Now if you were talking about bringing them the gifts of free money for tourism, well hell lets invade Cozumel. (We could use that as a starting point for places further south I would love to dive.)

Cat

 

[shereads]

Maybe Barbara is just saving them for this type of thing?

My views on bringing democracy and the gift of liberty to the third world nations is kind of hard to understand at times. (Although I think you know that, we've talked about it a time or three. )

Now if you were talking about bringing them the gifts of free money for tourism, well hell lets invade Cozumel. (We could use that as a starting point for places further south I would love to dive.)

Cat

Cozumel? You're kidding, right? You're just pretending not to know that corporate America owns all the Cozumel it can show on the books, without piquing the interest of the IRS, not to mention the SEC. (The younger ones over there see Arthur Anderson behind every tree. No sense of humor.)

It's not as if the USA needs to invade a country just to enjoy a share of the local resources. For example, did you know that Coca Cola/aka Minute Maid Orange Juice owns more real estate in Belize than anyone in Belize? Did we invade Belize? Of course not! Belize welcomed Democracy with open arms, and not a shot fired in anger.

All those ayatollahs and mullahs and crazy-eyed warlords could learn a thing or two from Belize's example. Be polite to corporate America when we try to do business the easy way. Not only will we pick up the lunch tab, nobody will have to be deposed, arrested for human rights violations, or inconvenienced, much less wounded. That "spider-hole" was Saddam's fault. We'd have put him up at the Westin if he hadn't become so paranoid about Iran that he forgot how to play nice. He'd have smelled better and we'd have saved $200 billion. It can take decades to show a profit on an investment like that. Who needs it?

In simpler times, Chiquita could turn a mosquito-coast backwater into a capitalist-friendly banana republic for the price of a few pesos, some stylish camouflage jumpsuits and free passes to the CIA's popular Dissident-Suppression Seminars. It was fast, efficient, and caused little visible unpleasantness. Things are ridiculously more complicated now. Today's capitalist can't overthrow even the smallest country without filing for a permit, which entails hiring lobbyists, funding political campaigns and playing "client golf" with idiots like George W. Bush. With the exception of the defense industries and companies like Halliburton who specialize in rebuilding stuff that's been blown up, nobody wants war. CEOs rate it well below their top ten favorite ways to spread Democracy.