Is "mid-life crisis" a male thing?

[M_K_Babalon]

Hmm, not so sure about the answers so far.

By "Mid-life crisis" I mean a crisis in its literal sense, standing at a crossroads, where your life may, or may not, take a differnt route. Summed up perfectly by Talking Heads "Once in a Lifetime".

So it's less to me of an emotional thing, than a life-choice decision thing.

That sounds like a life crisis and one doesn't need to reach the "middle" of it to have that.

 

[nice90sguy]

No, they're very differnt things.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

how about when you're a 35 years old woman, don't have kids but want kids. That can be a corollary to what's already been discussed.

I mean its not impossible to have a baby later than 35. Its not the end of all hope. A cousin of mine had a baby at 39, then another at 42. But at 35 the biological window is closing... and even if you don't want kids, or tell yourself you don't want kids, you're at the age where many of your friends have kids, and you're watching them grow up and it seems like a happy and fulfilling life. Or maybe you're seeing your parents grow old. Theyre in their twilight, and you can't help but think how nice it would be to give them grandkids, because you know, even if they're careful to not talk about having grandkids around you, you can see, unequivocally, that they would love it.

That's a sort of a mid-life crisis isn't it? At least a... tri-life crisis

As far as I'm concerned, that's too old to be having kids, even if its possible. Bringing a kid into 2023+ is inhumane, anyway.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

If a guy started doing any of the things you describe later in life it would be labeled having a mid-life crisis. And if you never stopped doing them people would accuse you of never growing up.

I don't wanna grow up, I wanna be a Toy's R Us kid.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

No, they're very differnt things.

I was partially joking.

 

[Devinter]

As far as I'm concerned, that's too old to be having kids, even if its possible. Bringing a kid into 2023+ is inhumane, anyway.

Whoa, slow down. Too old to be having kids? Why? There should be no additional medical complications worth mentioning at age 35, and in the years following, the risk only increases ever-so-slightly each year. Wouldn't you rather see a child brought into the world by a mother that is truly ready for the incredibly challenging path that lies ahead? At 35, you are more likely to be married, have a stable income, an acceptable home, and so on - especially in today's economy where it's difficult for young people to establish themselves properly. I don't think it's right to discourage anyone from moving forward if they want to have babies at 35 or older, until you reach the age that your doctor advices against it.

I also don't think having children is truly inhumane. Yes, the world is messed up in so many ways, but whilst it can feel like we're in a truly dark time, we've actually made significant improvements in a lot of areas that is often overlooked. It might not seem like it, but across the world there's actually less people starving to death than ever before, for example. Less pointless suffering. People are getting accepted for who they truly are at a greater rate. We are (far too slowly) moving towards greater times - it's just that nowadays we're much more AWARE of all the problems. But if we stop bringing new life into the world simply because we feel that things are grim, then we reduce our chances to keep improving. We need sharp minds to continue the work that's beginning today into a brighter tomorrow.

... Adoption is incredibly 'underrated' though, I'll give you that. So many babies just needing someone to love them.

 

[Devinter]

@M_K_Babalon If it wasn't clear - you can have whichever opinions you want, of course! They are perfectly valid. I was merely trying to offer an alternative viewpoint, not trying to imply that your way of looking at things is somehow incorrect.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

Whoa, slow down. Too old to be having kids? Why? There should be no additional medical complications worth mentioning at age 35, and in the years following, the risk only increases ever-so-slightly each year. Wouldn't you rather see a child brought into the world by a mother that is truly ready for the incredibly challenging path that lies ahead? At 35, you are more likely to be married, have a stable income, an acceptable home, and so on - especially in today's economy where it's difficult for young people to establish themselves properly. I don't think it's right to discourage anyone from moving forward if they want to have babies at 35 or older, until you reach the age that your doctor advices against it.

I also don't think having children is truly inhumane. Yes, the world is messed up in so many ways, but whilst it can feel like we're in a truly dark time, we've actually made significant improvements in a lot of areas that is often overlooked. It might not seem like it, but across the world there's actually less people starving to death than ever before, for example. Less pointless suffering. People are getting accepted for who they truly are at a greater rate. We are (far too slowly) moving towards greater times - it's just that nowadays we're much more AWARE of all the problems. But if we stop bringing new life into the world simply because we feel that things are grim, then we reduce our chances to keep improving. We need sharp minds to continue the work that's beginning today into a brighter tomorrow.

... Adoption is incredibly 'underrated' though, I'll give you that. So many babies just needing someone to love them.

I wasn't talking about all of that, the "even if it's possible" part was to infer aside from all that logic stuff. People claim "too old" for many things they actually aren't too old for, it's a tongue in cheek thing. I already have two kids, why would I wanna start over? Also, as much as I hate to give out my age; I am 35 and I ain't got none of that shit.

The second part was merely a joke about how shitty the world is. I never said anything about adoption.

 

[Devinter]

People claim "too old" for many things they actually aren't too old for, it's a tongue in cheek thing.

Apologies - sometimes I take things too literally. And the adoption comment was just my brain getting lost in the sauce.