Ladies - When is a Woman Satisfied??

[Dragonette]

Re: sorry to hear that, star

Dragonette's story was incredible! Strangely, like Freya, I had a girl 'friend' who was just that - a friend. She called it "friends with bedroom priviliges". Oddly, we never actually had intercourse, but in that relationship developed all kids of new ways (for us, at age 22) to have orgasms.

I remember fondly when she did a masturbation 'session' very similar to Dragonette's story - the resemblances are amazing. Instead of intercourse for the final act, she sat on me, pinning me down (arms and all), and 'made' me watch as she played with herself to 5 (I kinda lost count) orgasms. All I could do was lie there and watch her for almost an hour. It was great!!

Dragonette - anytime you want to practice writing stories, contact me!! ;-)

B

Chuckles, practice writing?

Some very interesting writing here, and yes, cuddles can be the best with the right partner, before and after.

Just being together can be satisfying.

Great thread Don.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Got a point there, Don

My sweet husband is always working extra, working late, etcetera, partly to support himself through college, partly to travel all over the world, visiting me/taking me with him on these trips. He's generous and very caring, and I do like travelling with him, no, actually, I LOVE it!

But I'm also worried that he's working too hard, that he's going to get sick or overworked or something. I have explained to him that I love him, as he is, body and soul, and that I'll be as happy for a bunch of meadow flowers as much as I would for some expensive trinket.

But, not only is it that we're both passionate about travelling and seeing the world, he's also a Romantic at heart, and likes to take me out to dinner and so on.

Everyone has his different taste, I suppose, and I know women who would committ crimes to have such a romantic and generous husband as mine. But all that I need... is him.
As he is.
Body and soul.

 

[Ladybird]

Re: Got a point there, Don

Everyone has his different taste, I suppose, and I know women who would committ crimes to have such a romantic and generous husband as mine. But all that I need... is him.
As he is.
Body and soul.

How often does this happen.. two people with conflicting views on what is romantic.

My ex would sometimes bring home flowers or chocolates.. which is a beautiful thought. But then he'd go and sit in front of the TV..not a very romantic action. And it was his arms that I wanted, not what he could buy me.

I tried explaining this to him time and time again.. but he just couldn't understand. He felt more comfortable buying things for me, than showing me affection.

 

[Laineforfun]

I totally agree. It is the time and affection that your partner gives you that is the most valued gift not material things. Otherwise we would just want a credit card or something not a lover....

Laine

 

[Ladybird]

Shhhh.. ladies, gather around me if you would please.

I think we all agree that Don has done a fine job here, and actually cares about what satifies us.

Don't foget when you post, that you can also vote for this thread. The voting box is on the bottom right hand corner of the page.

You can vote from 1 - 5, with 5 being the best.

I only mention it because it's something that I frequently overlook.

Thank you.

 

[Laineforfun]

[wispers] I agree with you Ladybird Don has done a great job with this thread. I cant help but wish that it has helped other men see us woman threw different eyes spacificaly Don's eyes.[wispers]

By the way I love the newest pic LadyBird

Laine

Oh ya and I voted (5)

 

[Ladybird]

WHOOHOOO!!

CONGRATULATONS DON... YOUR THREAD HAS A 5 STAR RATING


Well done my friend, a top rating for a top thread. Thanks for the interest that you have shown in satifying women. We appreciate it.

 

[Freya]

I love this thread. I haven't seen a lot of men posting on it, which is a shame, but we can just hope that they are reading it and taking the words to heart.

Someone said that they think men become more romantic and wishful for a serious loving relationship once they get over 30. I have found this to be true, although what's happening now - at least with people I know - is that there is a growing trend for men and women to remain single , especially once they get into their 30's. It's like a desperate need to recapture your youth, and some of them are totally vehement about not being trapped or tied down - just in case it might spoil some of their fun. The biggest problem with this is that you are allowing yourself to miss out on so many of the special things that having a relationship brings. I fool myself into believing that being single is the way to be - thankfully I have a sexual partner who satisfies me quite well physically and when we are together he is quite cuddly and affectionate. However, what this lacks is the ability to have someone who you can just go to when you are feeling down and have them put their arms around you. Someone who you can snuggle up to on the couch while watching TV. Someone who might rub your feet or your back after a long day. Someone to who you can say, "Hey I saw the funniest thing today!" on the spur of the moment without having to pick up a phone. Someone who makes you feel beautiful/desirable/wanted/loved even when you are feeling unworthy or ugly. Some day when I have that kind of relationship with someone, I think then, and only then, will I be truly satisfied.

 

[Braden]

I love this thread. I haven't seen a lot of men posting on it, which is a shame, but we can just hope that they are reading it and taking the words to heart.

Someone said that they think men become more romantic and wishful for a serious loving relationship once they get over 30.

Well while I would have to agree for the most part, I myself would much rather have a lasting relationship with someone I could possibly have a future with than simple casual sex. I'm always looking for that 'special someone'. Love and a lasting relationship are far more important to me. The constant companionship with someone with someone who know's everything about you down the your smallest flaw and still loves you for every little foible. . . That's what I'm looking for, always.

 

[love2kiss00]

enjoyed reading this thread.

This is great...I've enjoyed reading everyones replys...including the guys...seems to me the author of this thread had alot of respect by the ladies here and i think that's wonderfull..

But like everyone has said , every lady is different as we all know...but i do think the one common thing is that all women want to be held and touched afterwards.....

Of course there are such things as "quickies"...where either you are married or live together and i dont' think there is anything wrong with that....sometimes one person is satisfied and sometimes both are...

And to me it all goes back to commincation with the other person...talk to the other person...be open and find out what he or she enjoys...because thank God we are all different..

thanks.

 

[Don K Dyck]

Satisfaction - Five Stars

Thanks Dragonette, Svenskaflicka, Ladybird, Laine, Freya, Braden, Love2kiss for dropping by and sharing your wisdom.

Well!! I am truly overwhelmed!!! A Five Star Rating!!!! WOW!!! Thank you all for voting - I don't know what to say . . . I'm lost for words . . . except to say, thank you all for contributing so openly and honestly. In a society that shuns discussion about the intimate side of human relationships, it is simply wonderful to have found so many people prepared to share their experience and wisdom on what I think is an important overlooked part of our western society.

Well Dragonette, you have a beautifully wicked imagination . . .

Svenskaflicka in the cold dark north . . . perhaps you could convince your man that Oz has long sunny days, long white pristine beaches and lots of good people to share them with. December in Oz is beach time . . . as are most of the other months . . . except in Melbourne when winter is football season, not soccer, but our own Aussie Rules football - a totally incomprehensible form of aerial ping pong that substitutes for religion in many places. Just like Rugby in New Zealand.

Ahh, LB . . . you're plotting again heheheheheh Thanks for organising the people. <Cuddles>

Laine, Freya and LB have raised an important point when they identify the importance of the person and time, rather than material things. Oh, material possessions are great, but when kept in perspective to the other components of satisfaction. To "get it right" takes more than a bunch of flowers or a box of chocolates, and anyone who thinks otherwise is probably deluding themselves. The most valuable or important gift we can give to a partner - is ourselves, with all our faults and imperfections.

And your searching Braden, is what we all do. But what happens when you find it?? From my own experience, a relationship is a dynamic "organism", formed between usually two people, that must be nurtured like a garden, tended every day to keep it alive and fresh. it gains strength from shared activities, and this strength is tested in times of trial. Similarly, it weakens when the "partners" grow separately, or away from eachother, often to the final point of going separate ways. This could almost be the theme for a new thread.

Thank you for your contribution Love2kiss, communication is a very important component of a satisfying relationship.

Thank you all for sharing, the search goes on.

Don

 

[Arden]

Re: Satisfaction - Five Stars

<The most valuable or important gift we can give to a partner - is ourselves, with all our faults and imperfections.>

Don makes a good point here, one that I'd like to expand upon:

So much satisfaction can be gained by the unselfish giving of yourself to the one you love, thinking not of your own desires, but those of the one you care about so deeply... Not only in a sexual sense, but in all aspects of everyday life.

Receiving is wonderful, but the act of giving brings enlightenment to the soul.

 

[Ladybird]

Re: Re: Satisfaction - Five Stars

Receiving is wonderful, but the act of giving brings enlightenment to the soul.

Well said Arden.

We've already established that sexual satisfaction comes from the total package, not just a single act.

Now you've taken it a step further by saying that unselfish acts bring us closer, which enhances lovemaking.

Congragulations Arden on your clear thinking.

 

[lilrosie lips]

Maybe off the topic a bit....

For me, one thing that I have learned about myself is to relax a little bit and not expect that other person in my relationship will make me totally happy all the time.

I used to be one of those people who had a romantic ideal that once I found my "perfect" love that we would be always happy with each other. But has I have gotten older I don't expect that. For me just the realization that maybe sometimes my love will bore me a bit or I may annoy him a little is liberating in a odd way. It's not that I want to settle for less, but perfection is unattainble and puts too much strain on me and on my partner.
Now I am happy to have moments/pieces of time where I can say "right now, at this moment I am content", and that gives me the strenght to go on to another day.

Does that make sense to anyone? I think I may be finally growing up!!

 

[Laineforfun]

You make total sense lilrosie lips. Being perfect is a dream or expecting anyone else to be perfect is also unrealestic. I think you just have to find the balance of what you are willing to put up with and what you are willing to give from yourself. When you can over look the imperfections of your s/o then you can maybe find happiness for yourself. I mean if you think about it, we would be very bored if everything went perfectly for us. No highs and lows to make up from. There would be no suprises no warm tingly feelings when your s/o does those little special unexpected things for you. It would be very uneventful. Just my opinion anyway

Laine

 

[Don K Dyck]

Satisfaction

Hi thanks Arden, Ladybird, Rosie and Laine for dropping by and sharing your wisdom.

I think that the most important point raised here is one of balance - maintaining a balance between self and partner.

A relationship that is all giving and no receiving can be horribly draining as there seems to be little emotional return to the giving party. Similarly, we have seen numerous children totally spoilt rotten by being given everything without any responsibility of contributiing in return according to ability. I think that the same results occur in adult relationships. Without care for self an individual just . . . gets lost, worn out, emotionally demolished.

So Arden and Ladybird, giving is important, but receiving is equally important, and knowing that we deserve to receive in return is equally important. it is a sign of our respect for ourselves, which is a most important of growing up. Without self respect, life can easily become the pits!! There have to be minimum standards which we expect of a relationship and that we have to demand of a relationship, to make it work satisfactorily. These are negotiated between the partners as a part of everyday life - but you have to be happy with them, and be prepared to review them if necessary.

Ahh perfection - that strangely commercial concept, so easy to project and so difficult to achieve. I think Rosie and Laine, that you have to work at a relationship to keep it "perfect" and that maintaining it as "perfect" is an ideal that few attain, but many aspire to achieve. Just keep trying, I guess.

Thank you for sharing, the search goes on,

Don

 

[Arden]

Re: Satisfaction

I think that the most important point raised here is one of balance - maintaining a balance between self and partner.

A relationship that is all giving and no receiving can be horribly draining as there seems to be little emotional return to the giving party. Similarly, we have seen numerous children totally spoilt rotten by being given everything without any responsibility of contributiing in return according to ability. I think that the same results occur in adult relationships. Without care for self an individual just . . . gets lost, worn out, emotionally demolished.

So Arden and Ladybird, giving is important, but receiving is equally important, and knowing that we deserve to receive in return is equally important. it is a sign of our respect for ourselves, which is a most important of growing up. Without self respect, life can easily become the pits!! There have to be minimum standards which we expect of a relationship and that we have to demand of a relationship, to make it work satisfactorily. These are negotiated between the partners as a part of everyday life - but you have to be happy with them, and be prepared to review them if necessary.

Don

Oh my, I don't recall saying anywhere that I don't enjoy receiving... *blush*

However, your first sentence truly says a lot. When two partners are both able to give unselfishly of themselves, there is often a sense of harmonic balance that is very apparent when observing their interactions with one another.

Satisfaction can evolve, over time, often changing shape and form. The roaring fire gives way to glowing embers, yet an unmistakable warmth persists...

 

[Ladybird]

I Wonder...

Originally posted by Arden
However, your first sentence truly says a lot. When two partners are both able to give unselfishly of themselves, there is often a sense of harmonic balance that is very apparent when observing their interactions with one another

We've talked a lot here about giving unselfishly and genuine affection/love etc.

This is all well and good for couples who have been together for a while, and know and care for each other.

But what about new relationships? Because not all of the above factors are there, are we saying that a woman can't be satisfied?

 

[Champagne]

Re: Re: Re: Ladies - When is a Woman Satisfied??

I couldn't agree more solid.

No one falls alseep quickly and easily if they're not satisfied.

I agree is I am happy to sleep on you, I am satified. Its just such a shame how long its been since I was with a guy who was happy to cuddle.

Champagne

 

[Don K Dyck]

Satisfaction

Thanks Arden, Ladybird and Champagne for dropping by and sharing your wisdom.

Your analogy is just perfect, Arden. Your way with words is simply delightful. Age does not weary them, Nor the years condemn . . . and yet that magic telepathic link that grows between two caring people just gets stronger in spite of time. Seems that there are some very lucky "older" people on Lake Michigan.

Sorry, Ladybird, the discussion has tended to presume that there is an established relationship rather than a developing relationship.

I would think that both women and men can be satisfied in a new relationship, as they establish the boundaries within which they feel comfortable with each other. necessarily, this would include all aspects of the relationship which we have discussed previously. Things like preferences for breakfast food, favourite sports teams and limits for sexual behaviour.

I guess the unspoken part of your question is "Is satisfaction a fixed commoodity, or does it change with the relationship?" From Arden's lovely post she has observed a change over time, so the next question would be "Is this change in satisfaction negotiated between the partners?" Again, commonsense suggests that there would be negotiation, otherwise there could be breakdown. What do YOU think?

Agreed, Champagne, cuddling is one of the great underrated pastimes. The bolters really miss out on the best part - unfortunately.

Thank you for sharing, the search goes on.

Don

 

[Svenskaflicka]

New Love

We've talked a lot here about giving unselfishly and genuine affection/love etc.

This is all well and good for couples who have been together for a while, and know and care for each other.

But what about new relationships? Because not all of the above factors are there, are we saying that a woman can't be satisfied?

Again, I'd like to point out that there are different ways for a woman to be satisfied.

She can be sexually satisfied without having had enough - that's when she excuse herself and leave the exhausted guy in bed to go play with her sex toys in the bathroom.

She can be satisfied even if she's only had one little orgasm - that's when she cuddles up and wants to hug and talk until she falls asleep.

She can have had enough and just want to stop, even if she's not been satisfied - that's when she turns her back at the guy and falls asleep in record time.

She can be satisfied and had enough orgasms - that's when she is too tired and too happy to even ask the guy to roll off before he falls asleep. Or to roll off him, herself!

A new relationship, or even a one-night-stand, can give a woman incredible sexual satisfaction. A long, loving relationship can give a woman a great sexual satisfaction.

Sex and love are seperate things, both are great on their own, and even greater when combined!


(Sort of like chocolate pudding and whipped cream...)

 

[Freya]

The mystery and excitement of a new relationship can be satisfying in it's own way. Discovering quirks, foibles and the many different sides of your partner is one of the best things in lfe. That almost constant state of amazement when you leanr something new to love them for. It can also be frustrating and heart wrenching, but getting to know someone, heart and soul..learning new ways to please them...and having them learn what pleases you is totally satisfying in my books. No, there might not be complete sexual staisfaction at all times, as you discover each others bodies and comfort zones, but that's part of the business of growing together. The talk here has been mostly about partners who do know each other, and know what the other wants, but making those discoveries is also a wonderful experience.

 

[Arden]

Re: New Love

1) She can be sexually satisfied without having had enough - that's when she excuse herself and leave the exhausted guy in bed to go play with her sex toys in the bathroom.

2) She can be satisfied and had enough orgasms - that's when she is too tired and too happy to even ask the guy to roll off before he falls asleep. Or to roll off him, herself!

1) I don't understand this one. I think we were talking about being satisfied by a partner. If she has to go play with her toys, even if he is exhausted, she's satisfying herself because her needs weren't fufilled. Why aren't they using the toys together as a part of their lovemaking, just for the sheer pleasure of it? Get those toys out of the bathroom and into the bedroom - and have some fun!

2) Yes, one of the most endearing moments is when you or your lover fall asleep on top of one another. How nice it is to wake up in that position, and realize that you managed to completely wear each other out.

 

[Don K Dyck]

Satisfaction

Thanks Svenskaflicka, Freya and Arden for dropping by and sharing your wisdom.

Every one of your contris to this thread have contained great wisdom, Svenskaflicka, and this one is a real gem. I think you have clearly identified the distinction between sex and love, the relationship between them and the pleasures of both. And I agree, a new relationship is exciting because of the discovery principle with the new partner.

And Freya, your contri is one of the most sensitive pieces of writing that I have read on the subject. A new relationship is an opportunity to discover your new partner in pleasure, and in doing so, to enjoy the pleasure of discovery. A little circumlocuitous, but I hope you understand my meaning.

Arden, I hope your partner realises and appreciated your wonderfully uninhibited approach to life. I agree, it makes more sense to keep the toys in the bedroom and for the partners to play with them.

However, some male partners feel inferior/ashamed/let down if they cannot, of their own efforts, satisfy a woman to her level of need. But this unreal expectation is unfortunate because it leads to unnecessary frustration and tension within the relationship. Far better to understand that, on a particular evening, the lady was more lusty than her partner could satisfy, and wanted to reach the absolute heights of ecstasy which I suggest very few males understand, or are able to stimulate their partners to reach.

Many women understand and experience multiple orgasms and ecstatic pleasure when masturbating because they have indiviualy discovered Mr G's method, or something similar. But it appears that many men are still discovering that technique, and should be encouraged to read Mr G's thread for the pleasure of both partners.

Thank you all for sharing, the search goes on.

Don

 

[Kozza]

This is easy to answer....

Your woman is satisfied when she
a) Turns over and goes to sleep...
b) when she get's dressed and leaves
c) when she offers to make lunch or nythign to do with food other than chocolate syrup or cream...
d) when she asks just to be hugged and kissed and not fingered or whatever....
OR e) when she tells you straight out... " NO MORE!!!! I CAN"T TAKE IT... NO MORE... I'M SEXED OUT!!!!!!!!!!!"

See easy...
Although I don't presume to know all about hte female mind... so don't quote me...

Hope it's helpful....