Lil_Jenni's Adventures, Past and Present...

[lil_jenni]

Howdy everyone!

Thought I should stop be here since I've been posting on and off today and didn't want to neglect my thread.

Things are pretty much the same here. The twins are at that stage where they seem to grow and do new things every day. The kiddo is excited about the end of the school year. Hubby is loving his job, both on the civil litigation side and the pro bono coordinating side. And me, I'm just trying not to let my anxiety make me think it's all going to go boom at some point.

Oh, and I'm helping Misty look for an apartment here, as she is moving back to finish up her last year of college (although it turns out it will probably actually take her three semester). We are in friends only mode currently, as she has a new girlfriend and intends to keep that up despite the 100+ mile distance they will have between them soon. I'm actually hoping it works for her, since the new GF is very nice and probably a good influence on Misty, but I know Misty. It's not going to work. She's going to flake and hook up with someone. It just isn't going to be me. I don't want to be the one she blames for ruining this relationship.

 

[Purple_Fronds]

Wonderful update, you deserve all the goodness that this is.

 

[dkak001]

What you type seems content, so I hope it's true.

It's easy to forget how fast they grow, unless you're witnessing it! Amazing little things, right up until they start talking back... .
But you've got a while before that happens!

Sounds like the decisions regarding Misty are wise, even if they're only from the standpoint of protecting yourself. It's good to set your boundaries.

As for the anxiety, it's not going to blow up! If you feel like it will, just take it one minute at a time. And we're here if you need us.

 

[lil_jenni]

Well, last night Misty went to the strip club she used to work at here to visit a friend and ended up agreeing to dance at least weekend nights for at least the summer.

It's fucking frustrating. She tells me how she wants to change her life, concentrate on finishing college, and move on from stripping. But here she is, back doing it again.

Now, I've been guilty myself of repeating my own destructive shit over and over as nauseum, so I'm sure as fuck not claiming any moral high ground here. But she comes to me asking me to help her not make the same mistakes, and yet she goes out and does it and then laughs it off when I remind her she asked me to make sure she didn't do exactly what she's done.

So, I'm not going to hold my breath waiting for her to actually follow through on anything at this point.

But I'll still try to be supportive as a can and limit my venting to here and to Hubby.

 

[dkak001]

Sounds like you're handling it the right way. Supporting your friend, but taking care of yourself and your family first. I've seen people get involved and try to be helpful to others to the detriment of their own lives, and it's good to avoid that sort of trap if possible.

That source of income for her is probably going to be hard to give up, especially if she's trying to go to school. Being familiar with something and knowing you can make money doing it, is hard to walk away from. More so if she's trying to pay for school and support herself. Maybe when the degree is complete, it will be easier to break off from that environment. Personally, I would tend to cut her some slack in that regard, being a starving student sucks!

 

[lil_jenni]

Sounds like you're handling it the right way. Supporting your friend, but taking care of yourself and your family first. I've seen people get involved and try to be helpful to others to the detriment of their own lives, and it's good to avoid that sort of trap if possible.

That source of income for her is probably going to be hard to give up, especially if she's trying to go to school. Being familiar with something and knowing you can make money doing it, is hard to walk away from. More so if she's trying to pay for school and support herself. Maybe when the degree is complete, it will be easier to break off from that environment. Personally, I would tend to cut her some slack in that regard, being a starving student sucks!

I get what you are saying, and I'm trying to be supportive. But I'm the one she complains to all the time about stripping and the customers and the club management and everything, which is why she asked me to help her not make the same mistakes she's made in the past.

 

[Azuldrgon]

I get what you are saying, and I'm trying to be supportive. But I'm the one she complains to all the time about stripping and the customers and the club management and everything, which is why she asked me to help her not make the same mistakes she's made in the past.

You can only do so much.
At the end of the day, it's on her.
Still, kudos to you for being there...and all the other stuff you're doing.
I'd offer hugs if you were okay with it, so you get more flowers.

 

[lil_jenni]

You can only do so much.
At the end of the day, it's on her.
Still, kudos to you for being there...and all the other stuff you're doing.
I'd offer hugs if you were okay with it, so you get more flowers.

I'm okay with hugs too. Just sayin.

 

[Azuldrgon]

I'm okay with hugs too. Just sayin.

I'm a big consent guy now.

 

[JerseyJade]

I get what you are saying, and I'm trying to be supportive. But I'm the one she complains to all the time about stripping and the customers and the club management and everything, which is why she asked me to help her not make the same mistakes she's made in the past.

If she doesn't like being a stripper, then why does she keep doing it? Is the money that good?

 

[lil_jenni]

If she doesn't like being a stripper, then why does she keep doing it? Is the money that good?

She's been making really good money where she was. It will be less here. But that's only part of it for her. She likes the power of the tease, especially since she's only occasionally into guys. It's like a game. But then she tires of it and tells me how horrible it is.

She's like a person with the significant other they always bitch about l, but who gets mad at anyone who tells them what an asshat that person is.

Fuck it. She's gonna do what she's gonna do. I'll be there to listen, but that's it.

 

[JerseyJade]

She's been making really good money where she was. It will be less here. But that's only part of it for her. She likes the power of the tease, especially since she's only occasionally into guys. It's like a game. But then she tires of it and tells me how horrible it is.

She's like a person with the significant other they always bitch about l, but who gets mad at anyone who tells them what an asshat that person is.

Fuck it. She's gonna do what she's gonna do. I'll be there to listen, but that's it.

Me personally, I like giving lap dances... although most of the time they end up being more than just a lap dance.

 

[ShaneoD]

She's been making really good money where she was. It will be less here. But that's only part of it for her. She likes the power of the tease, especially since she's only occasionally into guys. It's like a game. But then she tires of it and tells me how horrible it is.

She's like a person with the significant other they always bitch about l, but who gets mad at anyone who tells them what an asshat that person is.

Fuck it. She's gonna do what she's gonna do. I'll be there to listen, but that's it.

It's probably the best thing you can do she's avoiding dealing with something but I'm in no position to say what the something is. We can all be self destructive it's incredible when you get past the thing that holds you back, but you'll only do it when you're ready.

You're a good friend for being there for her

 

[dkak001]

I get what you are saying, and I'm trying to be supportive. But I'm the one she complains to all the time about stripping and the customers and the club management and everything, which is why she asked me to help her not make the same mistakes she's made in the past.

Maybe being supportive might be just providing that ear to listen. Not judging her and letting her vent might be exactly what she needs...

That isn't always easy to do and if it's too much for you at times, you might have to step back some. In any case, I think you're right to be concerned. It's also OK to step back if it's too much...

 

[lil_jenni]

It's probably the best thing you can do she's avoiding dealing with something but I'm in no position to say what the something is. We can all be self destructive it's incredible when you get past the thing that holds you back, but you'll only do it when you're ready.

You're a good friend for being there for her

Maybe being supportive might be just providing that ear to listen. Not judging her and letting her vent might be exactly what she needs...

That isn't always easy to do and if it's too much for you at times, you might have to step back some. In any case, I think you're right to be concerned. It's also OK to step back it it's too much...

Thanks, guys.

Misty has found a place to live here with a friend who used to strip but doesn't anymore. She's older than Misty and was kind of Misty's mentor when she started dancing. I've never met her, but Misty has nothing but good things to say about her, and that's something for Misty. She can usually find something snarky or negative to say about anyone. Anyway, it seems like a good situation for her, and Hubby and I are going to help her move in a couple of weeks.

But another Misty issue is starting up. She wants to meet my crush (I'm going to start calling her Paula because it's better than "my crush," although I may have used that name on here before for someone in my real life... shit. I don't know... so, she's Paula... ), which as I've said before, worries me because Misty is not predictable. Misty has promised me she will be good, mainly because Paula, through her significant other, is related to Hubby's employment, and I think Misty respects Hubby's boundaries a lot more than she respects mine. But still... I'm not inviting the risk.

 

[13Fantasies]

Good luck on the Paula issue.

Worst case scenario, have Hubby put his foot down to Misty, especially if she seems to respect his boundaries more.

-Hugs-

 

[lil_jenni]

Good luck on the Paula issue.

Worst case scenario, have Hubby put his foot down to Misty, especially if she seems to respect his boundaries more.

-Hugs-

Yep. That should work. She respects him, and he is another person she never says anything bad about. Hell, I'm probably lucky she likes women... otherwise, I might need to keep her from being around him.

 

[ShaneoD]

Thanks, guys.

Misty has found a place to live here with a friend who used to strip but doesn't anymore. She's older than Misty and was kind of Misty's mentor when she started dancing. I've never met her, but Misty has nothing but good things to say about her, and that's something for Misty. She can usually find something snarky or negative to say about anyone. Anyway, it seems like a good situation for her, and Hubby and I are going to help her move in a couple of weeks.

But another Misty issue is starting up. She wants to meet my crush (I'm going to start calling her Paula because it's better than "my crush," although I may have used that name on here before for someone in my real life... shit. I don't know... so, she's Paula... ), which as I've said before, worries me because Misty is not predictable. Misty has promised me she will be good, mainly because Paula, through her significant other, is related to Hubby's employment, and I think Misty respects Hubby's boundaries a lot more than she respects mine. But still... I'm not inviting the risk.

Oh fuck no, I remember the stories about the beautiful Brazilian lady and your previous apprehension on Misty meeting her. Trust you gut, if it doesn't feel right don't do it. As you said it also has huge repercussions for your husband too.

Maybe she thinks she would be doing your favor by talking to her, just let her know that the biggest favorite she could do you is getting her life sorted and being in a happy place herself. That way it's all about her and she won't feel like she needs to return the favor.

 

[lil_jenni]

I met Misty's new roommate last night. For some reason, I had it in my mind she would be older than me because of how Misty talks about her. But no. She's almost five years younger. Not sure why it surprised me so much, but it did.

She seems really nice. She is a real estate agent now, something her ex got her involved in. Evidently he's in real estate too and got her started when she decided to quit stripping. I made a comment that maybe Misty could do that, but Misty shot that down. On the other hand, her roommate and I talked a bit about selling real estate, and I have to admit I'm intrigued. Who knows... It might be worth exploring.

 

[dkak001]

So, it sounds like Misty has another "voice of reason" besides yourself in her life right now?
Dis is goot, ya?

 

[lil_jenni]

So, it sounds like Misty has another "voice of reason" besides yourself in her life right now?
Dis is goot, ya?

Yeppers. Very much so.

 

[13Fantasies]

I met Misty's new roommate last night. For some reason, I had it in my mind she would be older than me because of how Misty talks about her. But no. She's almost five years younger. Not sure why it surprised me so much, but it did.

She seems really nice. She is a real estate agent now, something her ex got her involved in. Evidently he's in real estate too and got her started when she decided to quit stripping. I made a comment that maybe Misty could do that, but Misty shot that down. On the other hand, her roommate and I talked a bit about selling real estate, and I have to admit I'm intrigued. Who knows... It might be worth exploring.

I bet you could sell ice water to Eskimos.

 

[lil_jenni]

I went shopping today with Misty and the kids. I bought a few outfits in the size I am now, including a green dress we both think Hubby will love.

I am trying very hard to ignore the impulse that I need to lose 15 more pounds. Buying the outfits may help that. It also didn't hurt that our waiter at lunch was clearly checking me out in my little bit too tight dress today, and that was me with three kids in tow and one hot stripper as my lunch companion.

 

[lil_jenni]

I went shopping today with Misty and the kids. I bought a few outfits in the size I am now, including a green dress we both think Hubby will love.

I am trying very hard to ignore the impulse that I need to lose 15 more pounds. Buying the outfits may help that. It also didn't hurt that our waiter at lunch was clear checking me out in my little bit too tight dress today, and that was me with three kids in tow and one hot stripper as my lunch companion.

To clarify, I wasn't wearing a new dress to lunch. I was wearing my only summer dress that fits me, and it's too tight pretty much everywhere.

 

[13Fantasies]

I went shopping today with Misty and the kids. I bought a few outfits in the size I am now, including a green dress we both think Hubby will love.

I am trying very hard to ignore the impulse that I need to lose 15 more pounds. Buying the outfits may help that. It also didn't hurt that our waiter at lunch was clearly checking me out in my little bit too tight dress today, and that was me with three kids in tow and one hot stripper as my lunch companion.

I'm sure you will ALWAYS be checked out.

But you know the husband loves how you look and buying clothes that address how you look now is a great confidence builder too.

Keep on looking hot and being amazing.