Litiquette IV

[fishyfingers]

Okay, after returning from a bit of an absence, the subscribed threads were slightly useful for reminding me what I used to follow - although the specific threads had closed, the next reincarnation usually had a fairly similar name. Having said that, I don't really subscribe to new threads now, just pick through the first few pages to find the threads I'm looking for - and anything else that piques my interest.

The buddy list is something I haven't really used - and I thought the same of the ignore list until I went to check. Usually I just try to play nice and instinctively ignore the annoying people on the boards - but I have three people who have been added to my ignore list at some stage, so I don't know what they did to piss me off!

 

[ChainedUp]

Illusions, ideals, desires, wants, and reality. One of these is not like the other. And while we almost desperately want them all to be in the same bucket, all of us, on varying levels, understand that's likely never to be the case. But life, as they say is in the reaction.

How do you live your life knowing that your bucket may not be filled the way you intended?

 

[LWulf]

Hope for the best, plan for the worst. I don't hold any expectations that any part of my bucket will be filled. There are no guarantees in life.

Honestly, bucket lists are self indulgent and I don't really believe in self indulgence. The things that matter, truly matter, rarely are considered bucket list items. Those are things that are on my bucket list and my list is very short.

 

[Scout44]

Sometimes things don't go as we intended or planned that they might, that's how life works, however that isn't always a negative. That said... to answer the question....I believe if your bucket isn't filled in a way that fulfils you (regardless of the intended contents of that bucket) then you need to refill it with things that do. Otherwise.... well.... you only get one go at this life....

This exactly.

Life can be fleeting. Do what makes your soul happy.

 

[Trekka]

How do you live your life knowing that your bucket may not be filled the way you intended?

I (try my best to) live by the following mantra:

God*, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

*Or the Higher Power of one's choosing, the Universe, Flying Spaghetti Monster, Newtonian Physics, whatever works

 

[DarkSimian]

I tend to follow (Alan) Sheppard's Prayer (from the movie Space Cowboys)

Dear Lord, please don't let me screw this up.

 

[Trekka]

I tend to follow (Alan) Sheppard's Prayer (from the movie Space Cowboys)

Dear Lord, please don't let me screw this up.

Lol that's a good one!

In a similar vein...

I translate the serenity prayer for my little kiddo as follows-- God, help me be calm [about my bucket], brave [when filling/emptying bucket], and smart [regarding bucket contents, or lack thereof].

 

[ChainedUp]

I didn't read the question as being at all about bucket lists....

It wasn't intended to be about bucket lists, but I learned long ago this room can't be corralled. Best to post and stand back and see where it flows.

 

[LWulf]

I didn't read the question as being at all about bucket lists....

Nor did I, I just went off on a tangent after I answered the question

 

[Lord Pmann]

Part of being mature is living with the fact that we don't get everything we want. We have to grow up at some point and not be spoilt children anymore. I'm okay not having everything I want. It's not ideal. But I have a better life than lost. For that, I'm thankful.

 

[LallyH]

I think part of growing up is accepting that you will never have everything that you want in life. That's not to say that you shouldn't strive to achieve your highest ideals but to get a balance between what is important and valid, and what is trivial and transient.

Isn't spending your life being unhappy about what you don't have, and ignoring what you have achieved or you have got, a waste of that life?

And we have to judge whether, in attempting to gain something we think we need or have a right to, we will actually lose something we already have. Damaging or destroying an existing relationship because we feel entitled to more than one is what springs to mind here.

 

[ElasticMermaid]

Sometimes I get drunk and cry that I never got to be an astronaut.

 

[rubydlite]

Sometimes things don't go as we intended or planned that they might, that's how life works, however that isn't always a negative. That said... to answer the question....I believe if your bucket isn't filled in a way that fulfils you (regardless of the intended contents of that bucket) then you need to refill it with things that do. Otherwise.... well.... you only get one go at this life....

This exactly.

Life can be fleeting. Do what makes your soul happy.

This x 2
It took me almost 2 decades to realize this...the soul must be happy!

 

[Paul_Chance]

Illusions, ideals, desires, wants, and reality. One of these is not like the other. And while we almost desperately want them all to be in the same bucket, all of us, on varying levels, understand that's likely never to be the case. But life, as they say is in the reaction.

How do you live your life knowing that your bucket may not be filled the way you intended?

The trick is to bring your illusions, ideals, desires and wants as close to reality as you can. In the words of the philosopher poet Warren Zevon:

"I appreciate the best, but I'm settling for less, I'm looking for the next best thing."

 

[Lord Pmann]

Sometimes I get drunk and cry that I never got to be an astronaut.

#ShootForTheStars

 

[Schwarzschild]

Illusions, ideals, desires, wants, and reality. One of these is not like the other. And while we almost desperately want them all to be in the same bucket, all of us, on varying levels, understand that's likely never to be the case. But life, as they say is in the reaction.

How do you live your life knowing that your bucket may not be filled the way you intended?

Sticking to the metaphor-I gave up on the idea that I was the only one adding to my bucket. Sometimes it gets filled with a little rain, sometimes I'm lucky enough that someone else will fill mine with what they have in theirs and ask the same of me. And sometimes someone bumps into me and a little of theirs is sloshed into mine unexpectedly. Each day I see what I added to it mixed with what the world has thrown in and marvel at how complex and random it looks and I'm happy that it's nothing that I thought it would be. Predictable is boring.

 

[LWulf]

This exactly.

Life can be fleeting. Do what makes your soul happy.

I tend to think the soul, if one believes in such things, looks after itself. In the grand scheme of things, the harder you try to make something happen, the more elusive it gets.

The world will unfold itself to me when it's ready. And sometimes, I've experienced some truly magical moments that have made my 'soul' happy.

Kinda ironic that I contested this very same idea I've just said, last night in a PM to someone...

 

[RacyRedLips]

I think part of growing up is accepting that you will never have everything that you want in life. That's not to say that you shouldn't strive to achieve your highest ideals but to get a balance between what is important and valid, and what is trivial and transient.

Isn't spending your life being unhappy about what you don't have, and ignoring what you have achieved or you have got, a waste of that life?

*Like*

Sticking to the metaphor-I gave up on the idea that I was the only one adding to my bucket. Sometimes it gets filled with a little rain, sometimes I'm lucky enough that someone else will fill mine with what they have in theirs and ask the same of me. And sometimes someone bumps into me and a little of theirs is sloshed into mine unexpectedly. Each day I see what I added to it mixed with what the world has thrown in and marvel at how complex and random it looks and I'm happy that it's nothing that I thought it would be. Predictable is boring.

That's a cute way of putting it.

I tend to think the soul, if one believes in such things, looks after itself. In the grand scheme of things, the harder you try to make something happen, the more elusive it gets.

The world will unfold itself to me when it's ready. And sometimes, I've experienced some truly magical moments that have made my 'soul' happy.

^This^ .... even though my thoughts about bucket lists differ from yours.

 

[ChainedUp]

As you wander around Lit posting in threads, flirting in PM, playing via your preferred communication medium, has the marital status of your "friend" ever seriously impacted your Lit or online experience? Should it?

 

[AKentuckyLady]

As you wander around Lit posting in threads, flirting in PM, playing via your preferred communication medium, has the marital status of your "friend" ever seriously impacted your Lit or online experience? Should it?

*backs away from this topic and wanders off, shaking my head*

 

[ChainedUp]

*backs away from this topic and wanders off, shaking my head*

No backing away, tackle it head on please.

 

[beachbaby179]

No. I'm a lot of things. But hypocrite isn't on the list.

 

[rubydlite]

As you wander around Lit posting in threads, flirting in PM, playing via your preferred communication medium, has the marital status of your "friend" ever seriously impacted your Lit or online experience? Should it?

The 'right' answer is of course it's impacted it...as in 'they're married so stop right here and say good bye'
My answer is that I backed away from mostly all interaction here because I get attached. Whether as a friend or a 'friend'...I can't do secret, part time, virtual only. So yes...it's impacted my lit experience big time. One time I thought I could handle it all

 

[jezzilee]

*backs away from this topic and wanders off, shaking my head*

Follows the Kentucky Lady out crossing fingers that tomorrow's question will be easier.

 

[Schwarzschild]

As you wander around Lit posting in threads, flirting in PM, playing via your preferred communication medium, has the marital status of your "friend" ever seriously impacted your Lit or online experience? Should it?

I'm still newish here and haven't had a lot of experiences outside of some flirting, however this question has crossed my mind. At the end of the day I guess I try to look at it objectively. I don't know the other person's situation 100%, nor is it my business. I know my boundaries and my morals and I won't cross those, so I expect the person with whom I am communicating to do the same. We are all adults, and are here to help fill some desire or need in a relatively safe environment. I am not here to be the ethical police of others or pass judgement, there is enough of that in the real world and is part of why we're here. Maybe that's just an attempt to rationalize, but, it is my logic, for the time being at least.