Maryland is for lovers?

[StarGazer58]

StarGazer, as a fellow golf fan/nut/nerd, I'm seconding your motion with a photo of one of golf's true hotties . . . . . and later, I'll post a golf joke that I think will make you smile.

Oh yeah, Paige is smoking hot. So it Blair O'Neal but all I could find were bikini pics of her and I was trying to show the golf outfits. Michele Wei is another one that I love how she dresses on the golf course. Depending on who is on the leader board, sometimes I would rather watch the LPGA than the PGA.

Paige is a contributor to one of the golf magazines, I forget which one, and she was writing about being fitted for clubs and had a pose similar to the pic your posted. The women readers wrote in that it was not an appropriate pic and such. I thought it was a great pic.

 

[StarGazer58]

I see what you mean, yes. Point to StarGazer, lol.

I’ll still stick to my original assessment of golf though, because while they were all beautiful, I’m not excited by my own gender. But if you want to post some pics of men playing golf, feel free

What you wrote really made me think for a minute about attraction. The shape of a woman's face, her long hair, the curves of her body, her scent are all things that I love and find so attractive about women. Seeing a women walk in high heels, the sway of her hips, the clothes that women wear that can fire the imagination of a man are all things where I can see why men are attracted to women but then I think why are women attracted to men. I look at a man and don't see anything, I don't see anything to be attracted to so I am thankful that some women are still attracted to men. I understand when you write that you are not excited by your own gender and I glad you feel that way. Kind of hard for me to find pics of men golfers since I don't know your preferences in men but I will try to give some equal time viewing pleasure to the women. Then maybe I can entice you into posting a pic or 2 of you in a sexy golf outfit.

 

[BookLife79]

Probably a cheaper way to get your veggies than growing them yourself.

So does this mean you are not coming over to help me put down the new decking boards or build the outdoor kitchen this summer?

Hmm..I think my husband can attest to the fact that when it comes to home projects, I'm probably not the best helper. Plus the sun and I don't get along very well!

 

[spurtman]

"Give It To Her"

For StarGazer, as promised . . . . and you may even like this golf story, Elgirldani.
Enjoy!

“Give It To Her”

It was Father’s Day, and, following family tradition, a father, his son and his grandson went to the local muni for their annual Father’s Day round of golf.

Just as they were about to tee off, the starter waved his arms and said, apologetically, “Gentleman, I’m sure you can appreciate how busy we are today. I’m sorry, but I’m going to need to put a single with your group.”

The three looked at each other and rolled their eyes at one another . . . . then turned around to see who this “fourth” was to be . . . . and their jaws almost hit the tee box.

She was statuesque – a 6 foot beauty. She was buxom, with substantial yet firm boobs straining against the fabric of a golf shirt that appeared a size too small. She had perfect legs and a gorgeous ass presented perfectly by her tight golf skirt.

She also had an absolutely bitchy glower on her face as she marched up to the tee box, her clearly expensive clubs before her in a designer bag and push cart.

“Good morning gentlemen, and happy Father’s Day,” she said, dripping with sarcasm and insincerity. “I’m Tiffany. I’m here to play golf, and I don’t want any of your shit.”

She continued, to the slack-jawed amazement of the tri-generational group and the starter: “I’m serious about my game, and I play alone, for me and for me only. That means I don’t want to hear any jokes about how I can swing around these big tits, or about how someone with such a nice ass is wasting her time on a golf course. You got it?”

She was glaring at the three as she got silent nods of heads.

Grandpa broke the silence. “Yes, we got it. And we’ll respect your wishes, miss Tiffany.”

“OK, then,” said the starter, visibly nervous. “Ummm, lady and gentlemen, the tee is yours.”

“Miss, why don’t you go first?” said Grandpa, gently.

Tiffany nodded, strode to the ladies’ tee, bent over (to the delight of the three, who tried not to look – at least obviously), teed up her ball, and proceeded to stripe it almost 260 yards straight down the fairway.

Now the boys were slack-jawed not because of Tiffany’s flawless face, not because of her stupendous tits or ass or legs, but because they knew they were going to get their asses completely kicked all over the golf course. By a chick. On Father’s Day.

Tiffany went on to par the first hole, and waited patiently while grandpa, son, and grandson sprayed their tee shots, mis-hit their approach shots, and totally fucked up their putts, on the first hole.

To their credit (and to Tiffany’s), no one said or commented on anyone else’s performance. The three guys were clearly missing being able to good-naturedly give each other shit for their mis-hits, slices, duck hooks and other terrible shots from tee to green – but they wanted to respect her wishes. Hell, as difficult as it was not to gawk at her considerable assets, they were avoided looking at her altogether, so fearful they were of inspiring Tiffany’s wrath!

So they gamely marched on, and witnessed golf perfection, as Tiffany hit every fairway, every green in regulation, and one- and two-putted her way to a bogey-free, under-par round.

That is, until the finishing (18th) hole, when Tiffany slightly pulled her approach shot into a deep, greenside bunker.

“Shit!!” she exclaimed, as she and the boys walked up to the green, and Tiffany saw that her ball had been almost completely swallowed up by sand, on the downslope of the bunker. Perhaps the worst possible lie in the bunker, one that would make it near impossible for her to get it up and down.

The guys held their collective breath as they watched Tiffany climb into the bunker, settle into the sand with an unintentional shake of her perfect ass, and blast her ball out onto the green, where it stopped – about 12 feet from the cup.

Tiffany climbed out of the bunker, sighed, and then suddenly smiled at the three guy.

“Gentlemen, first of all, I want to apologize. I’ve been nothing but a complete bitch to you, and probably ruined your Father’s Day together,” she said softly. “And in return, you’ve been perfect gentlemen, allowing me to play my game without the comments and bullshit I get from all these other yahoos out here.”
“Maybe because you have been such gentlemen, I have been able to play the best round of my life,” Tiffany continued. “Never, ever have I played a bogey-free round of golf.”

“Now, here I am, needing a one-putt from what, 12 feet away, to complete a perfect round,” she said, looking at the three with a widening smile. “And you know what? I want this to be a perfect round.”

“So, here’s the deal. I want each of you to give me his read of my putt. And if I follow one of your reads, and my ball drops into the cup . . .,” Tiffany said, followed by a pregnant pause, “I will take the winner out in the woods behind the clubhouse, and give him the best. Blowjob. Of. His. Life.”

For a moment, the only sound came from noisy bluejay in the trees on the one side of the green. It was as if the damn bird was saying, “What’s taking you assholes so long?”

Suddenly the kid sprang into action. He squatted behind Tiffany’s ball, then walked around to the other side of the cup. Looking up at her, he said, “Miss Tiffany, it looks like it’s going to break left. I’d aim about six inches to the right of the cup, and give it a little speed.”

The kid’s father practically pushed his son out of the way as he eyed her ball from behind the cup. “Tiffany, pardon my French, but my son is full of shit, and has never been able to read these greens,” dad said. “It’s clearly going to break ever so slightly to the right, not the left. And it’s a down-hiller. Aim two balls to the left of the cup, and give it a gentle tap.”

Tiffany was processing the son-father’s contradictory advice when Grandpa started walking around the green. He stood behind the cup. He stepped down both sides of the putt. Then he stood over her ball and peered once again at the cup.

“Well, what do you think?” asked Tiffany.

“Hmmm,” replied grandpa as he bent over, picked up her ball and handed it to Tiffany, “I think it’s a gimme, Tiffany!”

 

[StarGazer58]

Hmm..I think my husband can attest to the fact that when it comes to home projects, I'm probably not the best helper. Plus the sun and I don't get along very well!

If you get burnt that just means you get an all over body rub with lotion.

 

[StarGazer58]

For StarGazer, as promised . . . . and you may even like this golf story, Elgirldani.
Enjoy!

“Give It To Her”

It was Father’s Day, and, following family tradition, a father, his son and his grandson went to the local muni for their annual Father’s Day round of golf.

Just as they were about to tee off, the starter waved his arms and said, apologetically, “Gentleman, I’m sure you can appreciate how busy we are today. I’m sorry, but I’m going to need to put a single with your group.”

The three looked at each other and rolled their eyes at one another . . . . then turned around to see who this “fourth” was to be . . . . and their jaws almost hit the tee box.

She was statuesque – a 6 foot beauty. She was buxom, with substantial yet firm boobs straining against the fabric of a golf shirt that appeared a size too small. She had perfect legs and a gorgeous ass presented perfectly by her tight golf skirt.

She also had an absolutely bitchy glower on her face as she marched up to the tee box, her clearly expensive clubs before her in a designer bag and push cart.

“Good morning gentlemen, and happy Father’s Day,” she said, dripping with sarcasm and insincerity. “I’m Tiffany. I’m here to play golf, and I don’t want any of your shit.”

She continued, to the slack-jawed amazement of the tri-generational group and the starter: “I’m serious about my game, and I play alone, for me and for me only. That means I don’t want to hear any jokes about how I can swing around these big tits, or about how someone with such a nice ass is wasting her time on a golf course. You got it?”

She was glaring at the three as she got silent nods of heads.

Grandpa broke the silence. “Yes, we got it. And we’ll respect your wishes, miss Tiffany.”

“OK, then,” said the starter, visibly nervous. “Ummm, lady and gentlemen, the tee is yours.”

“Miss, why don’t you go first?” said Grandpa, gently.

Tiffany nodded, strode to the ladies’ tee, bent over (to the delight of the three, who tried not to look – at least obviously), teed up her ball, and proceeded to stripe it almost 260 yards straight down the fairway.

Now the boys were slack-jawed not because of Tiffany’s flawless face, not because of her stupendous tits or ass or legs, but because they knew they were going to get their asses completely kicked all over the golf course. By a chick. On Father’s Day.

Tiffany went on to par the first hole, and waited patiently while grandpa, son, and grandson sprayed their tee shots, mis-hit their approach shots, and totally fucked up their putts, on the first hole.

To their credit (and to Tiffany’s), no one said or commented on anyone else’s performance. The three guys were clearly missing being able to good-naturedly give each other shit for their mis-hits, slices, duck hooks and other terrible shots from tee to green – but they wanted to respect her wishes. Hell, as difficult as it was not to gawk at her considerable assets, they were avoided looking at her altogether, so fearful they were of inspiring Tiffany’s wrath!

So they gamely marched on, and witnessed golf perfection, as Tiffany hit every fairway, every green in regulation, and one- and two-putted her way to a bogey-free, under-par round.

That is, until the finishing (18th) hole, when Tiffany slightly pulled her approach shot into a deep, greenside bunker.

“Shit!!” she exclaimed, as she and the boys walked up to the green, and Tiffany saw that her ball had been almost completely swallowed up by sand, on the downslope of the bunker. Perhaps the worst possible lie in the bunker, one that would make it near impossible for her to get it up and down.

The guys held their collective breath as they watched Tiffany climb into the bunker, settle into the sand with an unintentional shake of her perfect ass, and blast her ball out onto the green, where it stopped – about 12 feet from the cup.

Tiffany climbed out of the bunker, sighed, and then suddenly smiled at the three guy.

“Gentlemen, first of all, I want to apologize. I’ve been nothing but a complete bitch to you, and probably ruined your Father’s Day together,” she said softly. “And in return, you’ve been perfect gentlemen, allowing me to play my game without the comments and bullshit I get from all these other yahoos out here.”
“Maybe because you have been such gentlemen, I have been able to play the best round of my life,” Tiffany continued. “Never, ever have I played a bogey-free round of golf.”

“Now, here I am, needing a one-putt from what, 12 feet away, to complete a perfect round,” she said, looking at the three with a widening smile. “And you know what? I want this to be a perfect round.”

“So, here’s the deal. I want each of you to give me his read of my putt. And if I follow one of your reads, and my ball drops into the cup . . .,” Tiffany said, followed by a pregnant pause, “I will take the winner out in the woods behind the clubhouse, and give him the best. Blowjob. Of. His. Life.”

For a moment, the only sound came from noisy bluejay in the trees on the one side of the green. It was as if the damn bird was saying, “What’s taking you assholes so long?”

Suddenly the kid sprang into action. He squatted behind Tiffany’s ball, then walked around to the other side of the cup. Looking up at her, he said, “Miss Tiffany, it looks like it’s going to break left. I’d aim about six inches to the right of the cup, and give it a little speed.”

The kid’s father practically pushed his son out of the way as he eyed her ball from behind the cup. “Tiffany, pardon my French, but my son is full of shit, and has never been able to read these greens,” dad said. “It’s clearly going to break ever so slightly to the right, not the left. And it’s a down-hiller. Aim two balls to the left of the cup, and give it a gentle tap.”

Tiffany was processing the son-father’s contradictory advice when Grandpa started walking around the green. He stood behind the cup. He stepped down both sides of the putt. Then he stood over her ball and peered once again at the cup.

“Well, what do you think?” asked Tiffany.

“Hmmm,” replied grandpa as he bent over, picked up her ball and handed it to Tiffany, “I think it’s a gimme, Tiffany!”

Ah the wise older man. You got to give us some credit. Lol. That was a funny story though you sadly described my game as I play like the gentleman do.

I was playing golf one time in Myrtle Beach and this beautiful young woman drove the cart off the 18th green. She had on a highly coordinated short golf dress, tight top and matching argyle socks. She was stunning but I thought her outfit was a bit over the top. Then another cart pulls up and there is another beautiful young woman in a matching outfit to the first driving the cart. This was too much of a coincidence so I asked and found out that you could rent a caddy for a day. That is my type of caddy so I might have to do that sometime.

 

[spurtman]

Take it in a place and time when you can get it . . . .

StarGazer, the moral of my joke and your reply is this: in golf, as perhaps everywhere, go for it, and take it, when you can get it . . . . whether that's a peek, a (pre-approved) feel/grope, and/or more . . . as long as it's legal, consensual, and videotaped for Lit viewers . . . . LOL (that last part was a joke . . . . ).

Golf is all about balls, shafts, heads, and holes, Marylanders and visitors . . . here's hoping everyone who enjoys plays for fun, enjoys the company, and gets laid . . . . if they want to, LOL!

 

[StarGazer58]

StarGazer, the moral of my joke and your reply is this: in golf, as perhaps everywhere, go for it, and take it, when you can get it . . . . whether that's a peek, a (pre-approved) feel/grope, and/or more . . . as long as it's legal, consensual, and videotaped for Lit viewers . . . . LOL (that last part was a joke . . . . ).

Golf is all about balls, shafts, heads, and holes, Marylanders and visitors . . . here's hoping everyone who enjoys plays for fun, enjoys the company, and gets laid . . . . if they want to, LOL!

Spurtman, that is a good philosophy for life in general. Great minds think alike.

Here's to getting laid on the 18th green some night.

I think golf is a fun sport. Its challenging. Can be played from youth through old age, good exercise if a person walks the course, can be competitive or play by yourself. It is too bad that the younger generations are losing interest in golf though.

 

[KUJACK]

Westminster

Close to anywhere
Love my MD peeps!

 

[StarGazer58]

Close to anywhere
Love my MD peeps!

Have not seen you posting for a while Kujack. Glad to see you posting.

 

[spurtman]

Have not seen you posted for a while Kujack. Glad to see you posting.

Likewise, Kujak! Welcome back to Maryland hijinks . . . . .

 

[spurtman]

Have not seen you posted for a while Kujack. Glad to see you posting.

Likewise, Kujack! Welcome back to Maryland hijinks . . . . .

 

[Elgirldani]

Well, good ol' MD finally kicked out a beautiful weekend from start to finish. Hoping that all of you had as nice a weekend as I did. See you on the other side of Monday Fam!

 

[StarGazer58]

Well, good ol' MD finally kicked out a beautiful weekend from start to finish. Hoping that all of you had as nice a weekend as I did. See you on the other side of Monday Fam!

I totally agree El, it was a beautiful weekend. Could not have asked for better weather. I did have a good weekend. Played happy hour golf on Friday evening, met some co-workers for beers at Port City Brewery on Saturday night and then had dinner outside at the Yard House so that was a lot of fun then played golf on Sunday. In between I did work on the walkway in the backyard so not all fun. Now it is Monday and back to work.

 

[StarGazer58]

Happy Hour

So is anybody interested in the DMV getting together for a Happy hour on Wednesday evening? I was thinking of somewhere in Northern VA, Tysons, Arlington, Alexandria, just depending on the interest level. I have posted this in the VA thread also.

 

[LoquiSordidaAdMe]

So is anybody interested in the DMV getting together for a Happy hour on Wednesday evening? I was thinking of somewhere in Northern VA, Tysons, Arlington, Alexandria, just depending on the interest level. I have posted this in the VA thread also.

I love this idea, but I have to decline. Someday I'll retire and I won't have to worry about my private life impacting my career anymore. But that's still a few years away. Thanks for the great idea though, StarGazer! I hope some other folks take you up on it.

 

[craving_sensuality]

Chat

To all the Lovers in Maryland ....Hi..keep it UP and Proud...

 

[YoungToy]

Hi everyone! I'm back in Maryland for the summer, so just here temporarily! Any good breweries and things to do? Im about half an hour north of DC or so.

 

[StarGazer58]

Hi everyone! I'm back in Maryland for the summer, so just here temporarily! Any good breweries and things to do? Im about half an hour north of DC or so.

I was at Port City brewery in Alexandria on Saturday night. They had some good brews there but that is away from you. I have been to Loonies up your way. I believe it is off rt 32.

 

[StarGazer58]

I hear only my echo again in here. lol.

Last night was a total bummer. Was hot and sunny all day so thought I would play some golf after work and then come home and grill some short ribs. Got dressed, walked out the door at 5:30 to rain. Just like clock work, the rain rolls in just at quitten time. Couldn't have rained earlier in the day and then cleared up by 5:00. Nope. I will make another try tonight.

 

[Elgirldani]

I hear only my echo again in here. lol.

Last night was a total bummer. Was hot and sunny all day so thought I would play some golf after work and then come home and grill some short ribs. Got dressed, walked out the door at 5:30 to rain. Just like clock work, the rain rolls in just at quitten time. Couldn't have rained earlier in the day and then cleared up by 5:00. Nope. I will make another try tonight.

So dramatic, lol. I was only gone for a day

Yeah, the rain yesterday was disappointing. I wasn’t planning anything but it would have been nice to just get to enjoy the sun after work. And then the storm later last night made it hard for me to sleep. Ah well. I have the day off today so I’m not going to complain too much. lol

 

[miami3some]

So is anybody interested in the DMV getting together for a Happy hour on Wednesday evening? I was thinking of somewhere in Northern VA, Tysons, Arlington, Alexandria, just depending on the interest level. I have posted this in the VA thread also.

Seems like it’s all men in this group. What fun is that?

 

[Elgirldani]

Seems like it’s all men in this group. What fun is that?

What am I? Chopped liver? Lol

The group is dominated by men, true. And I’m way up by PA, so that is too far for me anyway.

 

[StarGazer58]

So dramatic, lol. I was only gone for a day

Yeah, the rain yesterday was disappointing. I wasn’t planning anything but it would have been nice to just get to enjoy the sun after work. And then the storm later last night made it hard for me to sleep. Ah well. I have the day off today so I’m not going to complain too much. lol

You know I am a drama queen. lol

Do anything fun on your day off?

 

[StarGazer58]

Seems like it’s all men in this group. What fun is that?

I agree. Was hoping that there might be some women lurking out there that might be interested in a happy hour meetup but it has been crickets on both this thread and the Virginia thread.

I guess the men could get together and complain about women. lol

Or if anyone needs a wingman for a night out.