Not getting it on so many levels...

[shy slave]

It has been a very long time since I was caned, but my ex liked to make a 5 bar gate on my ass, over and over until it went black.

He also liked to cane the underside of my ass cheeks where it meets the tops of the legs. When I sat down, I did it very carefully

We have a crop that Andante likes to use, it leaves neat lines and hurts like hell.

He also has a whip with knots at the end, that is thuddy and sharp all in the same breath.

I like the red strap he has, and it leaves pretty marks

I prefer thuddy toys to sharp stinging ones.

Now I miss him and his nasty, sadistic little toys

 

[Sir_Winston54]

... From what I've read, they require an awfully skilled hand, and even the lightest hits are beyond wicked (there's the wack of the initial impact, then the sting, then the burn), plus anywhere the striped cross, it will break the skin. I think I could handle spanking, or a belt, or probably a thuddy flogging (says the woman who's never experienced any of the above), but canes scare me.

The cane does require practice and care to be safe (relative term!), but when used lightly, the actual pain is no worse than that of a sting-y type flogger or a thin (<3/4") belt. Yes, it does create multiple sensations - as you described, "wack, sting, burn" - and if there is sufficient pause (at least 6-10 seconds) between strokes, the pyl gets the opportunity to feel each of them as a separate experience. BTW, I know this not only from hearing it from pyls, both my own and those of others, but from "trying out" each new cane (and toy, for that matter) on myself before attempting its use on someone else. (Yes, I have put welts and bruises on my own ass, lol - and had others do it to me when I felt I couldn't adequately test something by myself. {No, I'm not a switch nor a masochist - but I think it's only fair to have a good idea what the pyl is experiencing. That may be my greatest failing as a sadist - I'm fair about it, at least in some aspects. })
Incidentally, though I do tend in my personal preference to lean toward more severe use of the various implements, I have worked with "brand-spanking-new" (pun intended) pyls in the past, and we have discussed how much they thought they were looking to experience beforehand, discussed how they were feeling about what they were experiencing during, and discussed how they felt in retrospect, after they'd had time to think about the whole thing - sometimes a day or two later. The discussions during were very important to both of us, because they gave each of us insights into how much further we could and would go. Never once have I had a pyl use more than the cautionary safeword (yellow) (and then only a couple of times out of more than a dozen "newbies"), nor admit to having even thought about using the stop safeword (red).
Even when indulging in a full-out exercise of my "talents," I'm a firm believer in "warming up" the pyl, even though she may not prefer it. My experience has shown me that most people can go further if warmed up than if not (Cat is probably one of the exceptions to this rule )... for example, a pyl who can get to a level of 9.5 on an arbitrary pain scale of 10 when warmed up starting at 2 or 3, often can only tolerate a 7 or 8 if activities start at 5 or 6 (or higher). While punishment from me may well start at a high level, because I want it to be a not-good experience, "recreational" (sensual/sexual/pick-yer-label) activities will almost always start at a low level, and often will include little interludes such as having her neck, shoulders, breasts and back, and perhaps thighs, rubbed with a furry mitt. The contrast, I've been told, is exquisite.

 

[Netzach]

Ohhh no; not me. (I've never had a Brazillian. )

From what I've read, they require an awfully skilled hand, and even the lightest hits are beyond wicked (there's the wack of the initial impact, then the sting, then the burn), plus anywhere the striped cross, it will break the skin. I think I could handle spanking, or a belt, or probably a thuddy flogging (says the woman who's never experienced any of the above), but canes scare me.

I think you would find them invigorating. This is pure conjecture of course, but I think if I could get anything out of it the majority of remotely masochistically inclined submissives would probably dig on it. And they can be delicious.

In an invigorating, just ate a slab of jalapeno kind of way. Do you like hot food?

They require a reasonable amount of skill and a great deal more sensitivity. It's like most SM - dangerous if done wrong, but not brain surgery or magic.

I personally am a fan of taking caning from people who take canings because there is a level of invisible subtlety to the sensation that I don't think can be absorbed but for experiencing the devilish things on your own ass. I know that will piss off a lot of tops, but I don't care. I would not know how to do it as well as I do had I never undergone, there is no way. There is no way to explain how the pain dissipates and then comes back, redoubling, and how to understand the issues of timing if you are going for pleasure and duration. You can play with the mind so much better when you understand the way to time strokes with an understanding of their duration and their unfolding.

I haven't been caned in years, come to think of it. I'm not keen on revisiting it. The hardest caning I have had was one in which the top told me "if I don't stop you're going to bleed" giving me the option to go on. I quit, I felt good and done. I also had minimal marks the next day - build up on an olive skinned gal right and you'd never know you were there. Bummer, no trophy. It takes a lot more than a crossover or two to get someone bleeding, a lot more.

 

[CutieMouse]

Thank you Sir_W and Netz for the explination.

Netz, you may have a point about finding it invgiroating; there's a lot of things I never thought I'd find myself enjoying, but I do. LOL (Canes still scare me, though...)

As for hot food, it depends on which ethnicity- I hate hate hate jalepenos in my Mexican, love my Indian moderately spicy, put a bit more hot sauce than most in my Vietnamese food, and crave lots of wasabi and pickled ginger with my sushi. I guess you could say I'm a selective sensationalist. *chuckles*

 

[wenchhh]

Sorry hon, I got you confused with our very own Chicklet. I don't know why, but I do that often, confuse the two of you. Not by any similarities you may possess, I think it's just the "C" name, tho nope, that can't be it, b/c I NEVER mistake Cat for anyone I'd write to!

Anyhow... you haven't experienced a bet or flogger? hmmm, you poor poor dear. (grin)

So, it's a Masochist that likes pain, huh? Hmmmm.

Ohhh no; not me. (I've never had a Brazillian. )

From what I've read, they require an awfully skilled hand, and even the lightest hits are beyond wicked (there's the wack of the initial impact, then the sting, then the burn), plus anywhere the striped cross, it will break the skin. I think I could handle spanking, or a belt, or probably a thuddy flogging (says the woman who's never experienced any of the above), but canes scare me.

 

[CutieMouse]

Sorry hon, I got you confused with our very own Chicklet. I don't know why, but I do that often, confuse the two of you. Not by any similarities you may possess, I think it's just the "C" name, tho nope, that can't be it, b/c I NEVER mistake Cat for anyone I'd write to!

No biggie; it hit me that you were probably mixing me up with Chicklet. Blame RawHumor- he's the one who started that silly thread. LOL

Anyhow... you haven't experienced a bet or flogger? hmmm, you poor poor dear. (grin)

Nope.

For all my very practical knowledge and book-referrals-at-the-ready, my real world, hands on, face to face (or limbs bound, ass up, as it were) experience would fill a teacup with plenty of room left over. I have, however, experienced enough (essentially) solo exploration to know what I enjoy and need.

So, it's a Masochist that likes pain, huh? Hmmmm.

Yep. Pain can be delicious...

 

[zuzub]

Maybe we need a new pole?

OOPS! *ducks head quickly*

Don't understand.

 

[CutieMouse]

Don't understand.

There have been eleventy-million polls this week attempting to identify the numbers of subs/slaves/switches/tops/dommes/doms/whatever people in the BDSM forums... mostly because stubborn (annoying) people (myself among them) don't fit black and white definitions, so someone would start a poll, but it wouldn't accomidate switches, so someone would start a new poll, etc.

 

[zuzub]

I don't know. This pain thing is a little scary. Normally, I don't associate pain with sex. Mind you, that's not saying much. Generally, I associate sex with checking out my pedicure, wondering where the fuck I put that laundry ticket and hoping that my parking meter hasn't already expired (pfft, rarely a problem).

It's just not that fun, people. <snivel>

 

[shy slave]

I don't know. This pain thing is a little scary. Normally, I don't associate pain with sex. Mind you, that's not saying much. Generally, I associate sex with checking out my pedicure, wondering where the fuck I put that laundry ticket and hoping that my parking meter hasn't already expired (pfft, rarely a problem).

It's just not that fun, people. <snivel>

LOL

Pain stops all those wandering thoughts, trust me I'm a doctor......I mean I'm a slave LOL

 

[neonflux]

There have been eleventy-million polls this week attempting to identify the numbers of subs/slaves/switches/tops/dommes/doms/whatever people in the BDSM forums... mostly because stubborn (annoying) people (myself among them) don't fit black and white definitions, so someone would start a poll, but it wouldn't accomidate switches, so someone would start a new poll, etc.

Yes, I say yes to new polls, yes! *laughs uncontrollably*

BTW, re: caning - I think that, like everything, it just takes the right touch depending upon the person. (A cane is going to be my next toy - aluminum that can also be used for temperature play. Already have a rattan one.)

 

[Netzach]

I don't know. This pain thing is a little scary. Normally, I don't associate pain with sex. Mind you, that's not saying much. Generally, I associate sex with checking out my pedicure, wondering where the fuck I put that laundry ticket and hoping that my parking meter hasn't already expired (pfft, rarely a problem).

It's just not that fun, people. <snivel>

Neither is wonder bread when you are made to eat Indian.

The hot food analogy kind of covers it. That shit hurts your tongue and yet, it's kind of lovely.

 

[CutieMouse]

I don't know. This pain thing is a little scary. Normally, I don't associate pain with sex. Mind you, that's not saying much. Generally, I associate sex with checking out my pedicure, wondering where the fuck I put that laundry ticket and hoping that my parking meter hasn't already expired (pfft, rarely a problem).

It's just not that fun, people. <snivel>

Ohhhh, but boy ohhhh boy... (speaking as a masochist here)

Physiologically, if you are "warmed up" to the sensation (pain), and the person creating the sensation is pushing every erotic button they can think of while building the sensation(s), you get this endorphin rush (similar to a "runner's high"). Part of the endorphin rush is the release of oxytocin -oddly, a hormone released by the body when experiencing pain, while in labor, and during sexual climax/orgasm. So if you can get things timed properly so the sensations peak right about the same time you climax it's incredibly intense... in a really really good way.

Mind fucks (consensual psychological games) can be equally umm... stimulating, with or without the pain.

 

[Netzach]

Ohhhh, but boy ohhhh boy... (speaking as a masochist here)

Physiologically, if you are "warmed up" to the sensation (pain), and the person creating the sensation is pushing every erotic button they can think of while building the sensation(s), you get this endorphin rush (similar to a "runner's high"). Part of the endorphin rush is the release of oxytocin -oddly, a hormone released by the body when experiencing pain, while in labor, and during sexual climax/orgasm. So if you can get things timed properly so the sensations peak right about the same time you climax it's incredibly intense... in a really really good way.

Mind fucks (consensual psychological games) can be equally umm... stimulating, with or without the pain.

And don't forget humliation. Think about the bodily reactions when you're a bit embarrassed - the flush, the sweaty hands, the racing heart - it's a 45 degree turn at most from turned on.

 

[zuzub]

Can somebody help me with some feedback / advice for a second? No. It's not exciting, it has to do with managing pics / profiles / Avs

OK, so the system won't let me post an AV. If I go to Edit AV the "Do Not Use An AV" button seems 'hard' selected - ie non negotiable.

At this point, I'm not really clear on what's broadcasting, if anything. Please tell me what you are seeing so I can adjust:
a) My tits are rudely in your face,
b) You are seeing the lovely and charming Miss Dorothy Parker,
c) You see nothing.

Since we're at it let's go for a vote; tits, DP or nothing?
Personally, I'd go with DP. Tits you can see anywhere. It's not like we're having a shortage, but the lovely Miss Parker, you don't see much.

Wine is my friend. Giggle. So is Cutie. She's still the bomb.

 

[CutieMouse]

And don't forget humliation. Think about the bodily reactions when you're a bit embarrassed - the flush, the sweaty hands, the racing heart - it's a 45 degree turn at most from turned on.

Mmmmm... humiliation...

 

[CutieMouse]

Can somebody help me with some feedback / advice for a second? No. It's not exciting, it has to do with managing pics / profiles / Avs

OK, so the system won't let me post an AV. If I go to Edit AV the "Do Not Use An AV" button seems 'hard' selected - ie non negotiable.

Wine is my friend. Giggle. So is Cutie. She's still the bomb.

You can't get an Av until you've made 100 posts, but you're well on your way.

And I'm sooo far from being "the bomb", but thank you. LOL

 

[zuzub]

And don't forget humliation. Think about the bodily reactions when you're a bit embarrassed - the flush, the sweaty hands, the racing heart - it's a 45 degree turn at most from turned on.

Wow. If I had read this before, I wouldn't be so worried about technical shit. <smile> Good times. <cringe, there are good times, right?>

 

[neonflux]

Wow. If I had read this before, I wouldn't be so worried about technical shit. <smile> Good times. <cringe, there are good times, right?>

It's actually all good as long as it's negotiated, consensual! That's why it's called play! *gentle smile* (And when it's not, it's due to the regular relationship poop, not to the BDSM.) I think most folks here have found that we all start with hard limits that change over time. Neon

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Wine is my friend. Giggle. So is Cutie. She's still the bomb.

An open mind and good taste! You'll do well here zuzub!

 

[CutieMouse]

Ummmm really innocent example of humiliation play:

Being instructed to put on a cute, but casual, dress, no panties, and spend a minimum of 15 minutes at the local grocery store, picking out a minimum of 5 phallic vegetables (zucchini, cucumbers, carrots, etc)- knowing they will be used on you later. The odds that you will blush/feel self-conscious are high; the odds that you will ever look at produce again without a lingering naughty smile, is even greater.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Netz, you may have a point about finding it invgiroating; there's a lot of things I never thought I'd find myself enjoying, but I do. LOL (Canes still scare me, though...)

Ahhhh Cutie...

I have big, fat thuddy canes that I can use to give you a wonderful massage, thin sting-y canes I could use to draw blood but wouldn't, I hate turning toys into one-person play things... *grins*

I have canes in rattan, lexan, delrin, bamboo... straight, curve, and some are spiraled... each produces a wide range of sensations depending on speed of swing, time in contact, weight of the cane, width of the cane. They are magical.

I believe I could help you overcome your fear of canes, should you trust yourself to my tender mercies...

Other volunteers are encouraged to submit... uhhh... I mean apply! Yeah, apply! That's the word!

YIK,
- Geoff

 

[zuzub]

OMG - LOOK, I just got "experienced', I'm so excited!

....Um, wait a minute, that can't be right...

So basically, incessant blabbering on my part makes me smart here? "I am so smart, S-M-R-T."

If Homer Simpson were alive, I would NEVER fuck him...maybe Lisa, although I've never played with grls. Hmm, unless being 9 counts. Do I get points for that? No. Didn't think so.

Anyway, if I'm here for three months & I never shut up, do I get to be 'Chief Scientist'? I ALWAYS wanted to be one of those...

BACK AWAY FROM THE KEYBOARD, DRUNK GIRL.

Pfft. I like it here. You guys were really very classy dealing with the whole 'introductory tantrum' thing. Not really an angry, defensive person in sight. I think that says a lot. Don't you?

Anyway, I'm in the "I love you guys" giggly, happy place. <silly grin>

Thanks. This has been...?

 

[BiBunny]

Ugh. Canes. *Shudder* I'm scared to death of them, too, but I thought I was the only one. I'm in good company with The Mouse!

 

[CutieMouse]

Ugh. Canes. *Shudder* I'm scared to death of them, too, but I thought I was the only one. I'm in good company with The Mouse!

You're just a hop skip and a jump from EG, Bunny... I'm sure he can help you with your fear of canes. It'll be good for you. Really.

*nods wisely*