Pmann’s Reasons Why Women Won’t Talk To Me (You) Thread

[LadyLascivious1]

Bitchcraft…man if that was a crime on here Lit would be a sausage party.

Um, I think it already is a sausage party

 

[Misshotndeep]

Um, I think it already is a sausage party

Only a small population of the site has gone into circle jerk mode. Most of them were there before the site though.

 

[default24]

Um, I think it already is a sausage party

There's worse parties to be at than a sausage party. They can be great, if we just make them great again

 

[Dribble]

There's worse parties to be at than a sausage party. They can be great, if we just make them great again

MSPGA

Doesn't roll off the tongue

 

[default24]

MSPGA

Doesn't roll off the tongue

It's supposed to roll onto the tongue. I think that's the problem

 

[Misshotndeep]

Sigh… this is why we don’t pm you guys…. Just saying…

 

[LadyLascivious1]

Sigh… this is why we don’t pm you guys…. Just saying…

This is where I admit I PM 2 of the 3 sausages involved. Highly recommend. 10/10

 

[aussiegeekygal]

This is where I admit I PM 2 of the 3 sausages involved. Highly recommend. 10/10

So this makes you some kind of sausage connoisseur?
Because that's a title I think I'd like to achieve.
I like collecting really impressive titles.

 

[Mtnmike]

And no… I don’t flirt. I actually don’t know how.

Well that makes two of us lol

 

[Mtnmike]

Why do guys think sending dick pics or talking about their size interest us women. Unless I am about to take that sucker I am more interested in your character and intellect. Maybe that’s just me. I sure hope not.

You have a valid point, I never send pictures or say what size unless she ask for them, just not good manners in my opinion but who knows, I could be wrong.

 

[Btq97]

If asked I will but it's the sympathy that hurts more than the laughter

 

[may_I_please]

Sympathetic dick response


I am admiring the passive aggression

 

[SassySheDevil]

I find it is how they do the complimenting that makes me decide whether they are somebody I would interact with or not. Some people compliment a lot of others but it is in a positive, respectful way. Others, are totally inappropriate. I don’t know if they think they are coming across as flirty but they really aren’t. When a woman posts a picture of her chest for example, a comment of “wow, you have beautiful boobs!” is acceptable. It can make the poster feel good, it shows that the person viewing them is appreciative of the effort taken to post a picture. On the other hand, a comment of “fuck, I would like to shoot my load across those beauties” is totally inappropriate. The post has been sexualised.

Just my viewpoint


If that is throwing me under the bus, then you can do that whenever you want. Being an attention whore, I love the attention

I totally agree with you. There really are certain ways of complimenting that come off as creepy and others that feel genuine. I always said that when I had my own thread. I could usually tell who was being real and who was just blowing air up my skirt in hopes I'd get more naked in the next pic. There were so many guys who realized that once I wasn't going to show the honey pot. They just moved onto the next woman. So most of the time. I can tell the difference.
I also agree with the respect of comments. I use AMpics a lot because that is where I've always spent more of my time. You can walk into any womans thread, and the types of comments are vastly different. Then woman tends to set the tone. If she doesn't like what you and I are calling inappropriate. She will say so. Most of the times men will back down and be more polite and respectful after that. If she doesn't mine. She will banter back with her own flirt. I never liked those type of comments. Especially from guys I'd never talked to before. So, I spoke up early and often. Again. Another reason I kept my PMs off. Many would sneak those more vulgar comments into a PM. Just because I'm getting naked doesn't mean someone has to be crude. It is not my thing. But yes. There are some that don't mind that at all. Another one of those "Feel the room" things.

 

[ydahecnot]

I totally agree with you. There really are certain ways of complimenting that come off as creepy and others that feel genuine. I always said that when I had my own thread. I could usually tell who was being real and who was just blowing air up my skirt in hopes I'd get more naked in the next pic. There were so many guys who realized that once I wasn't going to show the honey pot. They just moved onto the next woman. So most of the time. I can tell the difference.
I also agree with the respect of comments. I use AMpics a lot because that is where I've always spent more of my time. You can walk into any womans thread, and the types of comments are vastly different. Then woman tends to set the tone. If she doesn't like what you and I are calling inappropriate. She will say so. Most of the times men will back down and be more polite and respectful after that. If she doesn't mine. She will banter back with her own flirt. I never liked those type of comments. Especially from guys I'd never talked to before. So, I spoke up early and often. Again. Another reason I kept my PMs off. Many would sneak those more vulgar comments into a PM. Just because I'm getting naked doesn't mean someone has to be crude. It is not my thing. But yes. There are some that don't mind that at all. Another one of those "Feel the room" things.

That wasn’t air

 

[Nevyn_Black]

It occurs to me, that if we really want this to be authentic, then we need a thread for each Lit man, and the women can come into that thread and tell each of us why they wont talk to us.

 

[SassySheDevil]

I do get the taking of pictures for yourself as I do the same. As I age, I need to still get those compliments, I need that boost. I mean, I don’t look at a picture of myself and go off to rub one out, but I do like to self-appreciate at times. It isn’t a vanity thing, it is something I do when I start to feel like I don’t like myself very much.

100% agree.

I will say that you are a sexy woman and it isn’t just the physical side of you. I have only seen a few pictures of you but you do have a sexy look about you. You ooze sexiness through your personality. You are funny, smart, assertive, kind and honest. It is a very neat little package that many people want the opportunity to open

and this is why I love you. Thank you.

I am of the mind that there are several stickies in this forum that can help alleviate some of the problems. How many people actually read those? Has anyone steered a naive or delusional Litster to those and said, wise up motherfucker?

Oh, trust me. Women have been trying to steer guys (that obviously don't get it) to any thread that will help. Most of them don't want the help/advice. They think they know better. We can hardly get many of them to read profiles let alone the stickies or helpful threads. Even the guys who do seem to understand have tried to intervene and offer advice and again. They rarely want it.

I'll be real and say women like me can probably take some of the blame for that, as it is not totally inappropriate to me. not actually my thing from a stranger, but I get Sassy's point. Well except, the voyeurs encourage the exhibitionist. If too many people stop commenting, they may get less participation could be a theory. If you say the same thing to all of the women, it doesn't mean much. So now, some may be trying to adjust. Wow you have beautiful boobs and fuck I would like to shoot my load across them are both fine to me, one too polite, one too far if from a stranger, but fine. shrug. Actually catching my attention generally requires humor which is real dangerous on the gals it doesn't work for. Now, of course, some just don't know anything about anyone and randomly spew vulgar cum dreams on everyone, so I can't take all the blame.

Do you remember many years ago when many of the women who traveled in the same group formed their own little group (chat) to help one another? They had a method of how to keep their threads on top. They would bump each other so the owner never had to (and didn't look needy) and they'd go in and lay on the sickly-sweet compliments? Suddenly all the women were bi. It was sad though. They admitted to using the most desperate men for their bumps and comments.

(this is still all over lit though. The pretending to be bi for attention)

However, the fact that we are all different women, with very different definitions of appropriate may factor in to some of it. I do appreciate how the men who try to encourage everyone have quite a task ahead of them, working with the very different personalities behind the boobs. Not saying your viewpoint is wrong at all, just saying I don't know that it is as easy to compliment everyone with all the different personalities.

I agree that a person has to figure out each woman before he knows what kind of compliments she likes or doesn't like. But I think it is always safe to start off respectful and then move into whatever way she is comfortable. Think of it like a public bar or something. Very few people would walk up to a woman and straight out tell her he'd like to cum all over her tits. (even if he thought it) But if he got her to go home with him. He might. But he would have to charm her first to go home with him.

But the one example I can use as making it hard to read her is. If I am friends/friendly with someone. I will let them push those boundaries because I know they understand that it is just talk and not really indicative of how I want to be spoken to. I know they are joking and being playful. But to the outsider. They might not know that. Therefor think that must be how I want to be spoken to. I was always careful to point out how I preferred to be spoken to though.

Women have beautiful bodies. Each and all. In no way should anyone think I don't think they should embrace whatever they need to help gain affirmation of that. I view general pics...those taken to compliment a thread...those given freely to all...as different from pics given individually. But I can see how there is an overlap here for some. And this thread is highlighting this.

For every 10 pictures I take. I typically like 1. So yes. If I take a picture that I really like. I will want to use it elsewhere. (typically here) For those that do post pictures here. There probably is more overlap.

That wasn’t air

haha trust me. I knew what they were trying to shove up there.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I totally agree with you. There really are certain ways of complimenting that come off as creepy and others that feel genuine. I always said that when I had my own thread. I could usually tell who was being real and who was just blowing air up my skirt in hopes I'd get more naked in the next pic. There were so many guys who realized that once I wasn't going to show the honey pot. They just moved onto the next woman. So most of the time. I can tell the difference.
I also agree with the respect of comments. I use AMpics a lot because that is where I've always spent more of my time. You can walk into any womans thread, and the types of comments are vastly different. Then woman tends to set the tone. If she doesn't like what you and I are calling inappropriate. She will say so. Most of the times men will back down and be more polite and respectful after that. If she doesn't mine. She will banter back with her own flirt. I never liked those type of comments. Especially from guys I'd never talked to before. So, I spoke up early and often. Again. Another reason I kept my PMs off. Many would sneak those more vulgar comments into a PM. Just because I'm getting naked doesn't mean someone has to be crude. It is not my thing. But yes. There are some that don't mind that at all. Another one of those "Feel the room" things.

I guess my point overall to this discussion is are you sure "feel the room" may not be too high of a standard for a significant number of men who are decent guys? like I don't mean to sound rude, but example argument..... Your 30+ mom body thread because it is the most glaring to me. If you haven't looked, go read the room (I noticed as since I haven't started a what 6th thead, I post in shared threads). I assume you'll see what I saw, out of 5 pages there is only maybe 1 actual poster. The rest are husbands and dude pretending to be a chick in multiple accounts. So, if 5 pages of men haven't read the room well enough for that, are you sure that setting an accurate appropriate versus not appropriate bar by reading rooms isn't too high a bar sometimes? I honestly don't know. I can read both and can not tell which is the more difficult read. Maybe, after 5 years, my expectation bar, when nudity is preset, has lowered due to watching all sorts of failed reads of many types. I think I might have stuck the bar in the back of my closet and just focus on the few who seem to get me well enough lol.

Do you remember many years ago when many of the women who traveled in the same group formed their own little group (chat) to help one another? They had a method of how to keep their threads on top. They would bump each other so the owner never had to (and didn't look needy) and they'd go in and lay on the sickly-sweet compliments? Suddenly all the women were bi. It was sad though. They admitted to using the most desperate men for their bumps and comments.

(this is still all over lit though. The pretending to be bi for attention)

nope .....if it existed in my time, I didn't notice and was excluded lol In fairness, I spent much time in the beginning significantly more focused on male friends than building female friendships. oops I enjoy the girl talk much more now.

I agree that a person has to figure out each woman before he knows what kind of compliments she likes or doesn't like. But I think it is always safe to start off respectful and then move into whatever way she is comfortable. Think of it like a public bar or something. Very few people would walk up to a woman and straight out tell her he'd like to cum all over her tits. (even if he thought it) But if he got her to go home with him. He might. But he would have to charm her first to go home with him.

But the one example I can use as making it hard to read her is. If I am friends/friendly with someone. I will let them push those boundaries because I know they understand that it is just talk and not really indicative of how I want to be spoken to. I know they are joking and being playful. But to the outsider. They might not know that. Therefor think that must be how I want to be spoken to. I was always careful to point out how I preferred to be spoken to though.

Could the repeated reiteration have raised your bar again because you spell it out often?

 

[Strixaluco]

One reason why men cannot read women or the room is that they aren't required to read other people, especially women, that much. Women are taught and required to learn that, as well as emotional skills, from early age.

 

[SassySheDevil]

I guess my point overall to this discussion is are you sure "feel the room" may not be too high of a standard for a significant number of men who are decent guys? like I don't mean to sound rude, but example argument..... Your 30+ mom body thread because it is the most glaring to me. If you haven't looked, go read the room (I noticed as since I haven't started a what 6th thead, I post in shared threads). I assume you'll see what I saw, out of 5 pages there is only maybe 1 actual poster. The rest are husbands and dude pretending to be a chick in multiple accounts. So, if 5 pages of men haven't read the room well enough for that, are you sure that setting an accurate appropriate versus not appropriate bar by reading rooms isn't too high a bar sometimes? I honestly don't know. I can read both and can not tell which is the more difficult read. Maybe, after 5 years, my expectation bar, when nudity is preset, has lowered due to watching all sorts of failed reads of many types. I think I might have stuck the bar in the back of my closet and just focus on the few who seem to get me well enough lol.



nope .....if it existed in my time, I didn't notice and was excluded lol In fairness, I spent much time in the beginning significantly more focused on male friends than building female friendships. oops I enjoy the girl talk much more now.



Could the repeated reiteration have raised your bar again because you spell it out often?

Oh, I wasn't part of that either. I had heard it from a couple of the women, and I think 2 other women. Part of what I loved about having my own thread was actually interacting with those who took the time to come in and comment/interact. I thought it was pretty sad.

I have not seen that thread. I'll have to look. I don't go in a lot of the "get naked" type threads that are started by men. This also goes to whom I am comfortable with and not. The guys who are more well known to be respectful. Starting a thread, I think I can join in on. I will go in. But there are so many different types of get naked type threads from men that just repeat the thread above them that I rarely go in them anymore. I also rarely go into the day threads anymore. "Titty Tuesday/Thong Thursday" because they aren't just a Tuesday or Thursday thing anymore. Women will go in going "Tee hee, it's Tuesday somewhere, right?" Theme threads seem to not stay themed.

You and I both know that a good portion of the men don't care if it is a dude pretending to be a woman. Many only care if the "woman" gets naked. Women have gone in and called out the fakes for years and a lot of the men either don't care, or get mad at you for ruining their fun. "You're just jealous!!"
So yes. I suppose that reading the room can be a challenge. But I do appreciate those that take the time to do so.

 

[Strixaluco]

The best answer is they don't talk to you because you are a man acting like most men do. Act like a human being acting like a human being. This is not rocket science... Treat a woman with respect and most women will talk to you at least one time . Pooooof ... magic Just saying...

And it's good to remember smoothness means less than sincerity. A smooth creepy post is still a creepy post. A sincere post, in turn, may well have its clumsiness overlooked.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Oh, I wasn't part of that either. I had heard it from a couple of the women, and I think 2 other women. Part of what I loved about having my own thread was actually interacting with those who took the time to come in and comment/interact. I thought it was pretty sad.

I have not seen that thread. I'll have to look. I don't go in a lot of the "get naked" type threads that are started by men. This also goes to whom I am comfortable with and not. The guys who are more well known to be respectful. Starting a thread, I think I can join in on. I will go in. But there are so many different types of get naked type threads from men that just repeat the thread above them that I rarely go in them anymore. I also rarely go into the day threads anymore. "Titty Tuesday/Thong Thursday" because they aren't just a Tuesday or Thursday thing anymore. Women will go in going "Tee hee, it's Tuesday somewhere, right?" Theme threads seem to not stay themed.

You and I both know that a good portion of the men don't care if it is a dude pretending to be a woman. Many only care if the "woman" gets naked. Women have gone in and called out the fakes for years and a lot of the men either don't care, or get mad at you for ruining their fun. "You're just jealous!!"
So yes. I suppose that reading the room can be a challenge. But I do appreciate those that take the time to do so.

Oh, I do miss my having a thread due to setting a tone. It is so hard to find a thread now. I am a simple gal, but it does go back to reading the room. Artsy too artsy, sexy women too saccharin and reserved, the dozen get naked by dudes thread too get naked by dudes. I'll tolerate titty Tuesday as eh fine, but then what about if I want to flash my tits another day. Now back to reading the tone of threads and trying to find one that is close enough. screw it. I'll spam people randomness. the struggle is real.

One reason why men cannot read women or the room is that they aren't required to read other people, especially women, that much. Women are taught and required to learn that, as well as emotional skills, from early age.

very true, especially in younger years, reading is very necessary. So yes I accept not all can as well as others, give latitude, and try to just take things as the best way possible.

 

[drobert44]

Oh, I do miss my having a thread due to setting a tone. It is so hard to find a thread now. I am a simple gal, but it does go back to reading the room. Artsy too artsy, sexy women too saccharin and reserved, the dozen get naked by dudes thread too get naked by dudes. I'll tolerate titty Tuesday as eh fine, but then what about if I want to flash my tits another day. Now back to reading the tone of threads and trying to find one that is close enough. screw it. I'll spam people randomness. the struggle is real.

very true, especially in younger years, reading is very necessary. So yes I accept not all can as well as others, give latitude, and try to just take things as the best way possible.

I wonder how moms taught this to their daughters.......

 

[Strixaluco]

very true, especially in younger years, reading is very necessary. So yes I accept not all can as well as others, give latitude, and try to just take things as the best way possible.

And I, in turn, think we should raise the bar for boys and men to the same level it is for girls and women. They ARE able to learn, if we stop thinking "boys are just boys"

 

[Dribble]

And I, in turn, think we should raise the bar for boys and men to the same level it is for girls and women. They ARE able to learn, if we stop thinking "boys are just boys"

I have sat in 12 step meetings for 36 years watching and learning how to read a meeting...or an individual. Trust me...there is no sex difference here. Some people have learned the skill...some have not

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I wonder how moms taught this to their daughters.......

Well I don't have daughters, but for me, I read my mother from a young age and followed. She also used to adjust a lot in many ways, because as a teen mom back then they were judge rather harshly by older people, so I'd see if I was supposed to be "seen but not heard", talk formal, be more relaxed etc by her body language and look. If she felt unsafe with something, I did see. And it grew and I saw what she saw. Then I am from a lower income, high crime area, so a lot street "rules" and situation reading were also passed down from older girls on the block. As we then did.

The most striking thing I recall, was my mother had more children in her 30s, all boys. I went home to visit when they were 6 to 12, we went out to eat, and we were getting a little silly and obnoxious, and I saw my mother was thinking it, so I hushed them and said we were too much. They argued everything was fine, she wasn't annoyed. I am all what, look at that look, the eyes, her lips, she is thinking we need to quit, trying to show them specifics and just blank. My mom tells me they can't do it, they don't see it, any of it. She was so right, all over the place, as the trip continued, they were clueless to her mood, thoughts, and feelings until she spoke. It floored me, as to me she is so easy to read. But they can't all be dense as hell, but all were. no idea why or how. They still suck at it.