Professional women that secretly like to be dominated

[Tallcajun]

Yes, and I have perfected the art of proving I'm a self-absorbed asshat in just one post!

Lmao!!

 

[Kim1980]

I fit the stereotype of the type A personality in my work environment and I guess in my marriage as well. My fantasies sexually always involve being submissive to an older Dom.

 

[inside_out]

I'm an aggressive female who is a total boss in the workplace; I run my ER with an iron fist. My ultimate turnon is a guy being able to overpower me if he wants. I love to fight and if you want me to do something in bed, it's soooo much hotter if you could make me if you wanted to. For me the ideal guy would be someone as smart as me, too - but strong enough that I know I wouldn't win.

 

[Moxon10]

I fit the stereotype of the type A personality in my work environment and I guess in my marriage as well. My fantasies sexually always involve being submissive to an older Dom.

Sounds delicious and a lot of fun

 

[sarahsub]

This is absolutely me!

I have a very responsible job, and have to work in very strict protocols.

I crave the opposite when not in work- nothing turns me on more than being able to put my trust in someOne else to allow them to do as they choose to me! Me being completely submissive tonthem
And allowing them to use my body for their pleasire

 

[TantricTrev]

This is absolutely me!

I have a very responsible job, and have to work in very strict protocols.

I crave the opposite when not in work- nothing turns me on more than being able to put my trust in someOne else to allow them to do as they choose to me! Me being completely submissive tonthem
And allowing them to use my body for their pleasire

report to me after work Sarah

 

[tairaruth]

It's nothing like that. That's insulting homosexuals. Terrible comparison.

Life experience massively influences what you like in the bedroom. If you take non-consent fantasies for example, a lot of those people developed that kink after surviving sexual abuse.

By that logic, growing into someone who has to be in control all the time in life could easily spawn a desire to be out of control. To me that's very clear.

Would like to see your research for this, or is it just 'personal observations'?
Another question .. do you think that perhaps, those who 'have' this 'secret fantasy' may have put themselves at risk for sexual abuse (young adult ranger perhaps) because of the fantasy rather than it being always the reverse being true. (I'm guessing that would be a rather Freudian way of looking at it?)

Moving on from that point .. supposing, of course, that your premise is accurate .. would it not follow that those (males, though not necessarily so) who enjoy the dominant role are 'out of control' in their every day lives?

 

[tairaruth]

Uh, no they didn't. That's a very common fantasy among women and to a lesser extent men too. Whether or not they've been abused has no bearing on what their particular sexual preferences are, it would just modify their willingness to engage in it.
I was comparing you taking arbitrary life experiences that might seem as though they're related to this subject and drawing non-existent links between them. I think that's called the Forer effect.

But not even slightly necessarily a sexual desire.

It's like your view on sex is wholly built off of decades-old myths.

Darn, should have tagged you in a response to this topic. Finding it very interesting and helpful, since I think I, for sure, have bought a lot of myths that I'm finding out are just not true.

 

[tairaruth]

A study was done here:

Attractiveness of the underling: An automatic power → sex association and its consequences for sexual harassment and aggression.
Bargh, John A.; Raymond, Paula; Pryor, John B.; Strack, Fritz
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 68(5), May 1995, 768-781. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.68.5.768

They did two experiments. In the first they found that in the selected group of men whom are likely to aggress or sexually harass there was an existence and automaticity of mental association between sex and power.

In the second experiment, they took the male participants and primed them with either power stimuli or neutral stimuli and found that the males who were sexually aggressive and exposure to the power stimuli. The attraction metrics were significantly higher to the females in the study group. The same correlation was not found among the non sexually aggressive males as to the higher attraction ratings by the females.

While this is only one study, to me it showed that power affects different males that were likely to agress differently then males who did not show that trait. It also showed that there was a link where the females in the study showed an attraction toward the males state of behavior after the power stimuli was primed. While not exactly "Domination" it does show that certain males behavior traits are rated higher to some females at a statistically significant number.

I'd be very curious to see if they reversed the experiment and exposed females likely to agress to power stimuli if they would become more or less attractive to a confederate group of males.

I think one has to be very careful in there application of stereotypical bias in assuming what would be vs what has been shown to be. That being said there may be some support for a subconscious link between males framed into sexually powerful states and attractiveness to females observing them in this state.

As to the relativity and relationship of the reciprocal and if it links at all to professional women or just women we need more peer reviewed data and experiments to cut through the obfuscatory veil of our collective ingnorance.

Yay. Real references. Brilliant. Thanks

 

[sarabrowning]

I wonder if there are any professional, well educated women that have high end jobs that secretly like to be dominated and used by a man. Years ago I worked for a office cleaning company and was seduced by an older women, she was in her 40s and I was in my 20s. She was the CFO (chief financial officer) of this big company and I was on the custodial staff. She came on strong and I'm not one to turn down a hot women. So we started banging during her lunch break. The thing is she wanted me to dominate her, treat her like a cheap slut and I did. The dirtier and more aggressive I got the more she loved it. So are there any professional women out there that are the same? Professional well educated business women that secretly wants to be fucked like a cheap slut by the guy that cleans your office?

Yes, I relate so much to the woman you described. Outside of the bedroom I want to be respected and treated equally, as an intelligent accomplished woman. In the bedroom I want to be dominated and compelled to please my lover; keep under constant sexual tension to gratify her every sexual desire.

 

[jensubuk]

I am a teacher - married to a very dominant hubby - and wouldn't want it any other way.
but I knew I was submissive BEFORE I was professional.... I think I have always been submissive, and thinking about it - my mother was submissive too - to my dominant father, and she was a professional (Doctor) too.... I think its part of our genetic make up.

 

[Jaime_H]

I am a teacher - married to a very dominant hubby - and wouldn't want it any other way.
but I knew I was submissive BEFORE I was professional.... I think I have always been submissive, and thinking about it - my mother was submissive too - to my dominant father, and she was a professional (Doctor) too.... I think its part of our genetic make up.

Being submissive and professional is not a conflict....
It depends how your submissiveness expresses itself.

 

[Irwin34]

I am a teacher - married to a very dominant hubby - and wouldn't want it any other way.
but I knew I was submissive BEFORE I was professional.... I think I have always been submissive, and thinking about it - my mother was submissive too - to my dominant father, and she was a professional (Doctor) too.... I think its part of our genetic make up.

My wife is in a senior position at work but submissive at home and from what she has told me she used to fantasies about when masturbating I would say she knew she was submissive long before she started working. From watching her mum is with her dad in normal live I would say it's part of their genetic make up to.

 

[firefighterscott]

I have always wanted a professional woman as a sub. I find professionals women extremely sexy. I think the whole outfit with skirt and blouse with jacket and heels is just hot and would be so much fun to control her while she works.

 

[petes478]

I wonder if there are any professional, well educated women that have high end jobs that secretly like to be dominated and used by a man. Years ago I worked for a office cleaning company and was seduced by an older women, she was in her 40s and I was in my 20s. She was the CFO (chief financial officer) of this big company and I was on the custodial staff. She came on strong and I'm not one to turn down a hot women. So we started banging during her lunch break. The thing is she wanted me to dominate her, treat her like a cheap slut and I did. The dirtier and more aggressive I got the more she loved it. So are there any professional women out there that are the same? Professional well educated business women that secretly wants to be fucked like a cheap slut by the guy that cleans your office?

Yes many women CEO's and professional woman charged with making major decisions each day develop this strong desire to relinquish command and control and yo be supremely dominated. They get relief by taking the role of cheap slut with no decision making responsibility. They relish the fantasy of giving up / giving in and being told what to do and how to do it. I've known many.

 

[DominantOne00]

Great thread

There's something amazing about an intelligent, in control, professional woman who is dying to be used when not at work. I've found that this type of woman can be among the most eager to please submissives. So I enjoy them for that reason, but it's also a delicious irony. The yin and yang. Many of these women are desperate because they can seem unapproachable because "they'd never go for that." Lastly, one of my other favorite parts of such a scenario is a woman who is in control and professional in the outside that is hiding a sexy set of stockings and a g string under her skirt. Or even a toy, all at the direction of her Dom. Her two worlds colliding in subtle ways, reminding her that she is still controlled, even when she's being professional at work. It's a sexy secret that is amazing!

 

[curvyjae]

It's really common in high powered women. My ex was in a high powered position and could only get off by being held down and called a whore.

The psychology makes sense if you think about. Spend your life dealing with responsibility, dragging people up to your level, and working your ass off, the idea of a guy who will just take all the stress of sex away and give you the pleasure you desire without you having to have yet more responsibility and control ... that's got to be appealing. And of course, for that to make sense, that's going to manifest itself as a whole bunch of various fantasies, including non-consent. Wanting to be degraded a called a whore ... it's all part of that image in their head of what a powerful guy would be like, and obviously they're typically so confident that they don't really take offense to the comment (as they don't believe it on any level), so can just revel in the sexualisation of those extreme words.

True story. Some women, like me, who are nearly always in control in day-to-day life, at work and at home, find it very arousing when a dominant man can earn their trust enough to submit. Then there is the fantasy of just being taken, some what reluctantly.

 

[Ava_44]

I have to agree, probably the sexiest thing my Husband ever did was after the kids had gone to sleep bend me over the sofa. I never had any choice in the matter

It's the little things, you know?

 

[LizVegas79]

I have to agree, probably the sexiest thing my Husband ever did was after the kids had gone to sleep bend me over the sofa. I never had any choice in the matter

It's the little things, you know?

Totally agree - one of the best things about having kids is squeezing in time for us. I LOVE when we have a little window of opportunity and he gives me zero choice in the matter!

ME: "Should we try to sneak upstairs to our bedroom?"
HIM: "Shh! Be quiet. Bend the fuck over, Lizzie."

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

True story. Some women, like me, who are nearly always in control in day-to-day life, at work and at home, find it very arousing when a dominant man can earn their trust enough to submit. Then there is the fantasy of just being taken, some what reluctantly.

This^

That trust is hard won, though.

 

[curvyjae]

This^

That trust is hard won, though.

Very hard won.

 

[FriendlyCuriousGuy]

True story. Some women, like me, who are nearly always in control in day-to-day life, at work and at home, find it very arousing when a dominant man can earn their trust enough to submit. Then there is the fantasy of just being taken, some what reluctantly.[/QUOTE]

This is an extremely arousing statement. I am attracted to intelligent, accomplished women. To earn the trust and submission of such a woman would be very satisfying.

 

[Duckers22]

An ex GF of mine was in sales - at a high level, very dominant in her role but out of work she was a typical normal woman but who in the bedroom had a very kinky side that included being submissive.

I don't think its anything to do with powerful positions/careers - I just think it's that type of person who happens to be in that position

I bet you'll find that type in every career position at some place in the world.

I once dated a Doctor who in work had to be amenable but in the bedroom also had various kinks

 

[DVS]

An ex GF of mine was in sales - at a high level, very dominant in her role but out of work she was a typical normal woman but who in the bedroom had a very kinky side that included being submissive.

I don't think its anything to do with powerful positions/careers - I just think it's that type of person who happens to be in that position

I bet you'll find that type in every career position at some place in the world.

I once dated a Doctor who in work had to be amenable but in the bedroom also had various kinks

This tendency for people (both men and women) in power jobs to be submissive in the bedroom is just that. It doesn't mean they will be submissive in any other way. And being submissive doesn't mean they are weak or a door mat. It's just a choice they've made. Actually, I think being submissive takes more strength than being dominant.

And if someone were no longer in this position of power, they might no longer have these subconscious leanings. I don't know if once they have a power job that they will always feel sexually submissive, or if it goes away, when the power job goes away. That would be something interesting to find out.

And this doesn't mean every person in a power job will be this way, either. Everybody is different. I'm sure there are people in power job that will tend to be dominant in their sexual lives. But, I've known more than a few women with power jobs to be more submissive in their sexual lives.

 

[curvyjae]

True story. Some women, like me, who are nearly always in control in day-to-day life, at work and at home, find it very arousing when a dominant man can earn their trust enough to submit. Then there is the fantasy of just being taken, some what reluctantly.

This is an extremely arousing statement. I am attracted to intelligent, accomplished women. To earn the trust and submission of such a woman would be very satisfying.[/QUOTE]


I am glad there are men that are attracted, not intimidated by intelligent, accomplished men. Giving more and more thought into finding someone who fits my needs for a long term arrangement.