The list is offensive because it uses epithets and equates being homosexual to being a pussy/little bitch/crybaby/etc., when gay men are usually just the opposite. BTW, using 'feminine' insults for men is offensive to women because it says we're somehow weaker and inferior. After all, what's wrong with ANYONE crying, being scared, etc.?
The list is offensive because it uses epithets and equates being homosexual to being a pussy/little bitch/crybaby/etc., when gay men are usually just the opposite. BTW, using 'feminine' insults for men is offensive to women because it says we're somehow weaker and inferior. After all, what's wrong with ANYONE crying, being scared, etc.?
"Queer" is a lot like the n-word in that way - it started as an epithet, and the GLBTQ community has "reclaimed" it and even given it new meaning (i.e. as in a "different" or "complex" or "other" or "inclusive" identity or orientation). The community and its allies use it most often as a descriptor or synonym, rather than an insult (like straight men in particular usually use it). This is a good piece on how it's currently defined by much of the GLBTQ community and its allies.
As a Caucasian woman, it wouldn't be acceptable for me to call someone of African descent a n*****. Likewise, even as a bisexual woman, I would not be welcome to call someone "a queer" or say "those queers." However, it wouldn't be offensive if I said "she's queer" or "some members of the queer community believe XYZ." If you're a straight man, you're definitely not welcome to use "queer" unless you're using it in the correct, non-offensive way. I'm sure you know that "fag[got]" is not an acceptable term, either, unless you're using the slang term cigarettes in the UK, or you're a gay man using it in the proper context.
Anyway, I'd strongly suggest taking the image you posted (and anything similar) out of your arsenal because it IS offensive to multiple groups of people, and I don't think you're that type of guy at heart. Don't argue it or try to defend it, just realize it's not OK for a variety of reasons, and take what we're telling you on board as valuable knowledge. You didn't get it, but hopefully you do now.
I'm a long-haired girl myself. Trust me when I say when a girl's gone through the effort to grow her hair out, a compliment on it will be VERY well received.
Mine is down to my butt now. Anything nice said to me about it goes right to my heart.
The list is offensive because it uses epithets and equates being homosexual to being a pussy/little bitch/crybaby/etc., when gay men are usually just the opposite. BTW, using 'feminine' insults for men is offensive to women because it says we're somehow weaker and inferior. After all, what's wrong with ANYONE crying, being scared, etc.?
"Queer" is a lot like the n-word in that way - it started as an epithet, and the GLBTQ community has "reclaimed" it and even given it new meaning (i.e. as in a "different" or "complex" or "other" or "inclusive" identity or orientation). The community and its allies use it most often as a descriptor or synonym, rather than an insult (like straight men in particular usually use it). This is a good piece on how it's currently defined by much of the GLBTQ community and its allies.
As a Caucasian woman, it wouldn't be acceptable for me to call someone of African descent a n*****. Likewise, even as a bisexual woman, I would not be welcome to call someone "a queer" or say "those queers." However, it wouldn't be offensive if I said "she's queer" or "some members of the queer community believe XYZ." If you're a straight man, you're definitely not welcome to use "queer" unless you're using it in the correct, non-offensive way. I'm sure you know that "fag[got]" is not an acceptable term, either, unless you're using the slang term cigarettes in the UK, or you're a gay man using it in the proper context.
Anyway, I'd strongly suggest taking the image you posted (and anything similar) out of your arsenal because it IS offensive to multiple groups of people, and I don't think you're that type of guy at heart. Don't argue it or try to defend it, just realize it's not OK for a variety of reasons, and take what we're telling you on board as valuable knowledge. You didn't get it, but hopefully you do now.
I love this thread. It has the crazy highs and brings us to the precipice of a hope and success, only to bring us down faster than a roller coaster ride, then to give us a few loop dee loops along the way, and back into cheering for the protagonist.
Here's to you Chris! I am SO rooting for you. This new girl sounds like a breath of fresh air, a ying to your yang, someone who draws you out of your shell and wants you to be better, even if it's in baby steps.
