Something to think about today

[jacuzzigal]

bump for a good thread.

 

[dcraz]

bump for a good thread.

Oh wow... How did I ever miss this? Always nice to see you again JG!

The last two weeks have been rough for me. For a variety of reasons. And it got me to thinking. About the important things in my life. Of course, there are many things that are important. Some are a given (family), some out of necessity (work) and some out of a sense of emotional need (physical health, etc.).

But it occurred to me that friends may very well have the biggest and most frequent impact on our lives. And it is all too easy for us to take them for granted.

I have been so blessed to have a few incredible friends. They have been men and women. Co-workers, neighbors and people from online. People who have allowed me into their lives and gladly stepped into mine. These are people that have done so much for me. Often without realizing it. They have been kind and comforting when I was down, supportive and encouraging at just the right times, hard on me when I needed it, always honest and sincere. But I think their greatest gift, on any given day, it to realize that they actually listened, or payed attention to something I said. Or just to know I was in their thoughts. They seem to know when I need them. A simple card in the mail. Or a message online. A phone call. Often to say nothing more than hello and let me know they were thinking of me. They do things or say things, without being asked or prodded. Not out of a sense of obligation, but out of a sense of friendship. Because they remembered something small or silly perhaps. But they remembered. And they cared. And they wanted to share.

When was the last time you 'thought' about your friends? Who they are? What they have done for you? What you have done for them? Do they need your friendship especially now? If asked by someone else, what would they say about you? Would they call you a friend?

What makes your friends so special?

Just something for me to think about today and to share with each of you...

 

[HisHarlot]

Oh wow... How did I ever miss this? Always nice to see you again JG!

The last two weeks have been rough for me. For a variety of reasons. And it got me to thinking. About the important things in my life. Of course, there are many things that are important. Some are a given (family), some out of necessity (work) and some out of a sense of emotional need (physical health, etc.).

But it occurred to me that friends may very well have the biggest and most frequent impact on our lives. And it is all too easy for us to take them for granted.

I have been so blessed to have a few incredible friends. They have been men and women. Co-workers, neighbors and people from online. People who have allowed me into their lives and gladly stepped into mine. These are people that have done so much for me. Often without realizing it. They have been kind and comforting when I was down, supportive and encouraging at just the right times, hard on me when I needed it, always honest and sincere. But I think their greatest gift, on any given day, it to realize that they actually listened, or payed attention to something I said. Or just to know I was in their thoughts. They seem to know when I need them. A simple card in the mail. Or a message online. A phone call. Often to say nothing more than hello and let me know they were thinking of me. They do things or say things, without being asked or prodded. Not out of a sense of obligation, but out of a sense of friendship. Because they remembered something small or silly perhaps. But they remembered. And they cared. And they wanted to share.

When was the last time you 'thought' about your friends? Who they are? What they have done for you? What you have done for them? Do they need your friendship especially now? If asked by someone else, what would they say about you? Would they call you a friend?

What makes your friends so special?

Just something for me to think about today and to share with each of you...

you covered some very valid points that needed saying. people never know how they may affect someone else's life by the simple and thoughtful gestures you mentioned. any one of those alone, or a few that may be expressed together, can sometimes make all the difference in another's day.

there are times, i'm sure we all have had them, when you may be doing something you've done every day for years, when suddenly a thought of a friend you haven't touched base with in a while runs through your mind and you have to literally drop what you're doing and contact them; right then, at that second. i can't begin to count the times that's happened to me.

real life or online friends; it doesn't matter. a friend is a friend. the only difference is the length of time you've actually known the person. i've got friends from online that i have a deeper connection with then some of my real life friends.

bless your friends when you think of them; include them in your prayers - whenever you say them. you never know when they may need that blessing.

http://i89.photobucket.com/albums/k207/amanda037691/purple/284d64da.gif​

blessed be

 

[MrFantasyMan]

a friend...to have one, or many, you must be a friend...and it made me think about some friends... ....what makes them friends...and inspired this little ditty...


A friend is someone we lean on,
When we are feeling weak.

A friend is someone who help's us,
Find what it is we seek.

A friend is someone who looks out for you,
In all they say and do.

A friend is someone you don't have to tell,
For they already knew.

A friend is someone who would,
Go that extra mile.

A friend is someone who show's us,
A heart that does truly smile.

A friend is someone who'll stand by you,
And help you through your day.

A friend is someone who'll show you,
There is always a way.

A friend is someone who'll dry your tears,
When you feel you have to cry.

A friend is someone who'll pull you through,
When the tide feels ever so high.

A friend is someone who'll be there,
Until the very end.

A friend is someone who'll show us,
How that broken heart they'll mend.

A friend is someone who give's us,
Understanding, Joy and Grace.

A friend is someone who makes this world,
Truly a wonderful place.


MFM

 

[DLL]

The Freedom of Being Wrong

Most of us make many mistakes every day—we fail to do what we promised, or we perform a task imperfectly or incompletely—and in the process, we look flawed, irresponsible, or inconsiderate. Then we worry that people will
notice our mistakes, because they might think badly of us. If they do notice, we go to great lengths to explain how it wasn't our fault, or that it wasn't really a mistake at all. If they persist in their blaming, we may criticize something about them in return, distracting them from their observations about our flaws. Even if no one does notice our mistake, we often still cover it up carefully, to be sure that no one ever will.

What do we get from all that worry and effort to hide our mistakes? When was the last time you felt closer to someone, or more accepted and loved, after you lied to him or her, or expressed your anger? As you do those things, has your relationship with anyone ever been richer or stronger? Of course not. Those behaviors interfere with our relationships and our own happiness every time.

So why do we continue to do the things that make others and ourselves unhappy? Why don't we just freely admit our mistakes? Because we've learned from a great deal of past experience that when we make mistakes and inconvenience the people around us, they consistently express their disappointment and irritation toward us. Without meaning to, the people in our lives taught us that we're "bad" when we make mistakes. Because there is nothing we want more than to feel accepted, those negative expressions are very painful to us, and we'll do almost anything in order to avoid being wrong and experiencing that unbearable discomfort again.

But we are not bad when we make mistakes. We're just wrong. Being wrong means that in a given moment we simply don't know the right answer or we're not wise enough to practically apply the knowledge we have. It means we're in the process of learning. Isn't that what we're supposed to be doing? Don't we have to be wrong ten, a hundred, a thousand times before we can do some things right consistently? Can we learn to play the piano, or hit a baseball, or even love people without making lots of mistakes? And if we're learning, does it really matter how many mistakes we make? Mistakes are simply unavoidable as we learn.

The worst thing we can do is hide our mistakes, because then we're doomed to repeat them, endlessly and needlessly. Look what happens when we're selfish and unloving in a relationship. That's an ugly and potentially embarrassing
thing to admit, which is why we lie about it. But the moment we lie, we absolutely guarantee that we'll repeat the same behavior the next time. And the problems in our relationship are then unsolvable.

The best thing we can do is admit when we're wrong, which is most of the time. As we do that, we experience the delightful freedom that comes when we're no longer chained to the same old feelings and behaviors associated
with our mistakes: fear, blaming, hurt, anger, lying, and withdrawal. When we admit we're wrong, we create opportunities for people to accept and love us as we really are, and that's when we can finally have loving relationships.

To be sure, some people will criticize us even more vigorously when we admit our mistakes, but as we continue to be honest, we'll find more and more people who will accept us as we are. As we experience the delight of really being accepted—with our mistakes—we'll discover that the sting of being wrong disappears. We learn that being wrong wasn't the problem all along. The real problem was our fear of people not accepting and loving us with our mistakes. That is always our greatest fear, and the only way to overcome it is to tell the truth about ourselves and create opportunities to feel Real Love—where people accept us and care about our happiness without our having to do anything to earn it.

We really are wrong on so many occasions—irresponsible, not loving, less than considerate—so why not admit it and enjoy the freedom and growth and acceptance that follow. The real tragedy in making mistakes is denying them. Then we can't do anything about them, nor can we feel the Real Love available to us......
and I want that kind of love in my life....

edited to give the credit of this for who wrote it...Dr. Greg Baer hes wonderful good advise from him

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

I have not read everything yet,BUT i do plan to.Any of you that know me knows August was just a horrid month for me for many reasons.
BUT hopefully,,,,all that is behind me now.I do know,,without a doubt it my mind,,i would NOT have gotten through this without my friends..You know who you are.ANd I love each and every one of you for what you did and for putting up with me.No one should have had to do all of that.But you guys did and once again,,thank you and I love you for what you did.

It takes so very little time to just say,,hello..I was thinking of you,,,,,

 

[HisHarlot]

I have not read everything yet,BUT i do plan to.Any of you that know me knows August was just a horrid month for me for many reasons.
BUT hopefully,,,,all that is behind me now.I do know,,without a doubt it my mind,,i would NOT have gotten through this without my friends..You know who you are. And I love each and every one of you for what you did and for putting up with me. No one should have had to do all of that. But you guys did and once again,, thank you and I love you for what you did.

It takes so very little time to just say,,hello..I was thinking of you,,,,,

ali;

it wasn't done because they/we felt it had to be done. it was done because they/we wanted to do it.

big difference sweet girl.


blessed be

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

ali;

it wasn't done because they/we felt it had to be done. it was done because they/we wanted to do it.

big difference sweet girl.


blessed be

that is a very sweet thing to say,,,

the fucked up thing is about this,,with thh exception of 2 people,,,all that helped me get through this,,will be the very ones to read this
BUT,,,the main cause of this(there were several factors)
will never even know it existed,,,

 

[Cathleen]

Still holds for me (repost).

One of my very favorite quotes is by Emerson, I like his work but it is his student, Thoreau, I favor more. However Emerson seems to sum up friendship to me just perfectly, he says.......

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

 

[Cathleen]

I keep a folder on my laptop called "Good Reads", usually I read at least one thing from the contents each day. Late last year I was given the following and it has become a staple for my mind -- it and another item I'll post have been etched inside and gratefully so. I read this one slowly, in quiet moments.



Rumi - Guest House

This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.




(Rumi is worth a google, IMHO.)

 

[Cathleen]

This is another in my special folder... it's there because of what it says and because of who sent it to me. (I googled for the author but it seems to be a parable told through the ages. Interesting these last two favorites come by way of the most unstable place on the earth today - the Mid East.)


The Cracked Pot


A water bearer in India had two large water pots. They hung on opposite ends of a pole which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house, the cracked pot always arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the water bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master's house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfection, miserable that it could accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself and I want to apologize to you."

"Why?" asked the water bearer. "What are you ashamed of?"

"I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work and you don't get full value from your efforts," the pot said.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot and in his compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the cracked pot took notice of the sun warming beautiful flowers on the side of the path and this cheered it. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again it apologized to the water bearer for its failure.

The water bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path and everyday while we have walked back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

MORAL: Each of us has our own unique flaws. We're all cracked pots. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. We need to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. There is a lot of good out there. Every day we look in the mirror we can wonder what flowers we'll unknowingly be watering that day.

Author Unknown

 

[dcraz]

You really are beautiful Cate...

 

[HisHarlot]

had to share this:

Slow down for three minutes to read this. It is so worth it. Touching words from the mouth of babes. A group of professional people posed the question, "What does love mean?" to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds. The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have ever imagined.

See what you think:

"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
Rebecca - age 8​

"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4​

"Love is when a girl puts on perfume
and a boy puts on shaving cologne
and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5​

"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your
French Fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy - age 6​

"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4​

"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him,
just to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7​

"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss."
Emily - age 8​

"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas... if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)​

"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."
Nikka - age 6
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)​

"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt,
then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7​

"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man
who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6​

"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared.
I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy
waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that.
I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8​

"My mommy loves me more than anybody.
You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6​

"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine - age 5​

"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy, smelly and sweaty,
and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7​

"Love is when your puppy licks your face
even after you left him alone all day."
Mary Ann - age 4​

"I know my older sister loves me
because she gives me all her old clothes
then has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4​

"When you love somebody your eyelashes go up
and down and little stars come out of you."
Karen - age 7 (what an image!)​

"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet
and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6​

"You really shouldn't say 'I love you'
unless you mean it.
But if you mean it, you should say it a lot.
People forget."
Jessica - age 8​

And the final one --
Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge.
The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard,
climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor,
the little boy said,
"Nothing, I just helped him cry."​

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

Still holds for me (repost).

One of my very favorite quotes is by Emerson, I like his work but it is his student, Thoreau, I favor more. However Emerson seems to sum up friendship to me just perfectly, he says.......

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

my friends are all masterpieces,,,,HUUGGSS you guys,,,,,,

 

[Leeleigh]

Oh wow... How did I ever miss this? Always nice to see you again JG!

The last two weeks have been rough for me. For a variety of reasons. And it got me to thinking. About the important things in my life. Of course, there are many things that are important. Some are a given (family), some out of necessity (work) and some out of a sense of emotional need (physical health, etc.).

But it occurred to me that friends may very well have the biggest and most frequent impact on our lives. And it is all too easy for us to take them for granted.

I have been so blessed to have a few incredible friends. They have been men and women. Co-workers, neighbors and people from online. People who have allowed me into their lives and gladly stepped into mine. These are people that have done so much for me. Often without realizing it. They have been kind and comforting when I was down, supportive and encouraging at just the right times, hard on me when I needed it, always honest and sincere. But I think their greatest gift, on any given day, it to realize that they actually listened, or payed attention to something I said. Or just to know I was in their thoughts. They seem to know when I need them. A simple card in the mail. Or a message online. A phone call. Often to say nothing more than hello and let me know they were thinking of me. They do things or say things, without being asked or prodded. Not out of a sense of obligation, but out of a sense of friendship. Because they remembered something small or silly perhaps. But they remembered. And they cared. And they wanted to share.

When was the last time you 'thought' about your friends? Who they are? What they have done for you? What you have done for them? Do they need your friendship especially now? If asked by someone else, what would they say about you? Would they call you a friend?

What makes your friends so special?

Just something for me to think about today and to share with each of you...

Special... hmmmmmmmm......what makes you special to me, and very dear to my heart.......

My sweet friend.. you are one of the few people that I have learned to totally trust on here. You wouldn't let me give up on life, love and trust...For that alone I owe you a huge debt because you made me listen to you, and because of that, I would not be where I am today.. Sitting here, in Marks apartment in Alaska, totally satisfied after some good loving. If I had not listened, I would not have been open to allow this amazing man into my life... I would not have given him anything more that polite chit chat.. But I did listen to you.. I fell in love, and now I have moved here to Fairbanks to live with him..

I love you dearly my friend.. but its more than that, and believe me, what you did is priceless.. but you also always answered my questions honesty...

Thank you DC, for wandering into my life, and becoming the friend you are to me..

 

[done_got_old]

Oh wow... How did I ever miss this? Always nice to see you again JG!

The last two weeks have been rough for me. For a variety of reasons. And it got me to thinking. About the important things in my life. Of course, there are many things that are important. Some are a given (family), some out of necessity (work) and some out of a sense of emotional need (physical health, etc.).

But it occurred to me that friends may very well have the biggest and most frequent impact on our lives. And it is all too easy for us to take them for granted.

I have been so blessed to have a few incredible friends. They have been men and women. Co-workers, neighbors and people from online. People who have allowed me into their lives and gladly stepped into mine. These are people that have done so much for me. Often without realizing it. They have been kind and comforting when I was down, supportive and encouraging at just the right times, hard on me when I needed it, always honest and sincere. But I think their greatest gift, on any given day, it to realize that they actually listened, or payed attention to something I said. Or just to know I was in their thoughts. They seem to know when I need them. A simple card in the mail. Or a message online. A phone call. Often to say nothing more than hello and let me know they were thinking of me. They do things or say things, without being asked or prodded. Not out of a sense of obligation, but out of a sense of friendship. Because they remembered something small or silly perhaps. But they remembered. And they cared. And they wanted to share.

When was the last time you 'thought' about your friends? Who they are? What they have done for you? What you have done for them? Do they need your friendship especially now? If asked by someone else, what would they say about you? Would they call you a friend?

What makes your friends so special?

Just something for me to think about today and to share with each of you...

You are absolutely correct. I think that my friends are special because they accept me as I am, with all of my faults and bad habits. They don't pretend that they always understand what makes me tick, but they always make sure my batteries are charged.

 

[dcraz]

Special... hmmmmmmmm......what makes you special to me, and very dear to my heart.......

My sweet friend.. you are one of the few people that I have learned to totally trust on here. You wouldn't let me give up on life, love and trust...For that alone I owe you a huge debt because you made me listen to you, and because of that, I would not be where I am today.. Sitting here, in Marks apartment in Alaska, totally satisfied after some good loving. If I had not listened, I would not have been open to allow this amazing man into my life... I would not have given him anything more that polite chit chat.. But I did listen to you.. I fell in love, and now I have moved here to Fairbanks to live with him..

I love you dearly my friend.. but its more than that, and believe me, what you did is priceless.. but you also always answered my questions honesty...

Thank you DC, for wandering into my life, and becoming the friend you are to me..

LeeLeigh,

Oh wow. I am so blown away by these kind words... All I ever did was listen, respond honestly, and offer words of encouragement to someone who proved to be a wonderful friend to me from the beginning. But more than that, I am happy for the incredible love you have found. I have enjoyed the times we shared and always knew you would find love one day.

I happen to have incredible faith in people. And I still believe in love. I also believe the world needs more people in love and fewer filled with hate and dispair. You have shown that love and dreams can and do come true. And you inspiration to us all...

Good luck my dear friend. Drop me a line one day soon when you have a break from all that loving.

 

[dcraz]

You are absolutely correct. I think that my friends are special because they accept me as I am, with all of my faults and bad habits. They don't pretend that they always understand what makes me tick, but they always make sure my batteries are charged.

Faults? Bad habits? What are you talking about? Have you been holding out on me? What does a man have to do to get on THAT list of friends that get to see 'this' side of you???

DGO my dear, you are one of the very first fools, uh I mean friends, to accept me here on Lit. You always entertained me and all those around you with your distorted humor, intelligent banter and ever present rapier wit.

You know... You would think... Someone who was now retired would have a little more time to hang around with the likes of 'us'.

Miss you girl!

 

[HisHarlot]

You are absolutely correct. I think that my friends are special because they accept me as I am, with all of my faults and bad habits. They don't pretend that they always understand what makes me tick, but they always make sure my batteries are charged.

dgo,

you have an absolutely amazing AV! it's beautiful. this is the second one from the original? i know you had another one - also in red - up once.

i don't know where you found them or if you made them... but they are lovely.

 

[done_got_old]

Faults? Bad habits? What are you talking about? Have you been holding out on me? What does a man have to do to get on THAT list of friends that get to see 'this' side of you???

DGO my dear, you are one of the very first fools, uh I mean friends, to accept me here on Lit. You always entertained me and all those around you with your distorted humor, intelligent banter and ever present rapier wit.

You know... You would think... Someone who was now retired would have a little more time to hang around with the likes of 'us'.

Miss you girl!

Fool? Distorted humor?
Intelligent Banter? Rapier Wit?​

Well, two out of four is not bad!

I'm here all the time; you're not!

 

[done_got_old]

dgo,

you have an absolutely amazing AV! it's beautiful. this is the second one from the original? i know you had another one - also in red - up once.

i don't know where you found them or if you made them... but they are lovely.

Thank you. I have several and made all but one of them.

 

[BeachGurl2]

What a great thread, DC. Since you've been instrumental in my ability to get over some big hurts this week, I second what everyone else here has said, first about friends and second about you. Haven't read through the entire thread yet, but you can bet I will be doing that soon. Today has again been a difficult day for me and this thread is making it a bit better.

 

[done_got_old]

What a great thread, DC. Since you've been instrumental in my ability to get over some big hurts this week, I second what everyone else here has said, first about friends and second about you. Haven't read through the entire thread yet, but you can bet I will be doing that soon. Today has again been a difficult day for me and this thread is making it a bit better.

Trust me, there's a good day waiting for you down the road. There always is. My problem is I've misplaced the road map.

I hope tomorrow proves to be a better day for you.

 

[BeachGurl2]

Trust me, there's a good day waiting for you down the road. There always is. My problem is I've misplaced the road map.

I hope tomorrow proves to be a better day for you.

Thanks, DGO. I'm trying to stay optimistic. And I can relate the lost road map, as I've lost mine as well.

 

[done_got_old]

Thanks, DGO. I'm trying to stay optimistic. And I can relate the lost road map, as I've lost mine as well.

You're too young to have lost yours. I can't remember if I've gone to the bathroom sometimes. It's bad.