The Bears Den
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OH cuddly that was so good.....LMAO.....thanks sweetie for the chuckle this morning....I hope all is well with you and your not working to hard....Take care
MaryBears
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Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving But Aren't
Reach in and grab the giblets.
Whew, that's one terrific spread!
I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
Tying the legs together will keep the insides moist.
Talk about a huge breast!
And he forced his way into the end zone...
She's 5000 pounds fully inflated and it takes 15 men
to hold her down.
It's Cool Whip time!!!!
If I don't unbuckle my pants, I'm going to burst!
It must be broken, cause when I push on the tip,
nothing squirts out!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
Reach in and grab the giblets.
Whew, that's one terrific spread!
I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
Tying the legs together will keep the insides moist.
Talk about a huge breast!
And he forced his way into the end zone...
She's 5000 pounds fully inflated and it takes 15 men
to hold her down.
It's Cool Whip time!!!!
If I don't unbuckle my pants, I'm going to burst!
It must be broken, cause when I push on the tip,
nothing squirts out!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
FRENCHIE44T
Lover of oral sex
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- May 27, 2003
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Hello All
THE WEEKEND IS HERE
Hope You Are All Well
THE WEEKEND IS HERE
Hope You Are All Well
dragonhearted
Not pussy-footin' around!
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cuddlybear1970 said:
rolling on the floor laughing!!! omg...that musta hurt!
PassionsFlame
erotic mischief
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Hehehe *BIG smile* thanks for that!!!!MaryBears said:
MaryBears
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here is one for everyone....PassionsFlame said:
A little boy and his father were visiting a mall for the first time.
They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially
by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together
again. The boy asked his father "What is this, Father?"
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded "Son, I
have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is.
While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady
in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button.
The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room.
The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles
of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to
watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.
The walls opened up again, and a beautiful 24 year-old woman stepped
out. The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said
quietly to his son, "Go get your Mother"
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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Thanks JaybirdeJaybird3 said:
OH and here is another one....
Blondes have more fun. . . parking
One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Norman's wife goes out and moves her car again.
The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park..........." Then the electric power goes out. Norman's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow plow can get through?"
With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, Norman says, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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WORDS WOMEN USE
******************************
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
NOTHING
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows! )
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a nonverbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a nonverbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow."
GO AHEAD!
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not! Faint. Just say you're welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"
Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology!
And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh!
******************************
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
NOTHING
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows! )
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a nonverbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a nonverbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow."
GO AHEAD!
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not! Faint. Just say you're welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"
Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology!
And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh!
FRENCHIE44T
Lover of oral sex
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.
HELLO
HELLO
Puddin36
Literotica Guru
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- Aug 13, 2001
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- 1,853
Re: Re: A GREAT SUCCESS
Hugs, Puddin
kayte.........thanks so much for the dancing bananas......those always make me LOL. I have been taking it easy most of the weekend and am feeling better every day. Thanks again for the prayers and good thougts.kayte said:{{{{{{{{{{Puddin}}}}}}}}}
I am so happy to hear of the success of the procedure!!! Yippee!!!!
Please take care of yourself this weekend. Spoil yourself.
Keeping you in my prayers!!!!
Hugs, Puddin
Missingmeds
Just being
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Hello to you all. A friend recommended that I try this thread where the people are friendly.
I brought one of those truth stranger than fiction things along with me. This has been all the current talk here in Columbus, Ohio.
The naked photographer of Central Ohio has been identified. Police spokeswoman, Sherry Mercurio says 32-year-old Stephen P-Linnen of Columbus is charged with public indecency and assault. He posted bond last night but was re-arrested this morning on a warrant from Gahanna police. Linnen is Deputy Legal Counsel for House Speaker Larry Householder. Linnen is on paid leave pending the outcome of the investigation. Police say Linnen was not wearing clothes when they arrested him yesterday. Police found a camera, stocking cap, and sunglasses stashed by a nearby garbage bin. Police then searched his apartment and found incriminating photographs. The so-called naked photographer has ambushed nearly 40 women in the Columbus area, wearing nothing but sunglasses and a cap. Police say he smiles and snaps photos of the women's shocked expressions.
I brought one of those truth stranger than fiction things along with me. This has been all the current talk here in Columbus, Ohio.
The naked photographer of Central Ohio has been identified. Police spokeswoman, Sherry Mercurio says 32-year-old Stephen P-Linnen of Columbus is charged with public indecency and assault. He posted bond last night but was re-arrested this morning on a warrant from Gahanna police. Linnen is Deputy Legal Counsel for House Speaker Larry Householder. Linnen is on paid leave pending the outcome of the investigation. Police say Linnen was not wearing clothes when they arrested him yesterday. Police found a camera, stocking cap, and sunglasses stashed by a nearby garbage bin. Police then searched his apartment and found incriminating photographs. The so-called naked photographer has ambushed nearly 40 women in the Columbus area, wearing nothing but sunglasses and a cap. Police say he smiles and snaps photos of the women's shocked expressions.
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