The Bears Den
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Missingmeds
Just being
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Good evening to everyone. I hope your day has been good and your evening to be great.
Puddin36
Literotica Guru
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Good evening everyone
Looks like things are hopping here at the Den. Loved all the jokes and the wonderful stories, especially the gas station one that Mary posted.
Unfortunately I am not having a good night.......but I won't go into details. Coming here and seeing everyones post helps me to get my mind off my problems for a bit.
Take care everyone and I'll post when I can.
Hugs, Puddin
Looks like things are hopping here at the Den. Loved all the jokes and the wonderful stories, especially the gas station one that Mary posted.
Unfortunately I am not having a good night.......but I won't go into details. Coming here and seeing everyones post helps me to get my mind off my problems for a bit.
Take care everyone and I'll post when I can.
Hugs, Puddin
Missingmeds
Just being
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If you need to talk Puddin, we are here.
Be careful MaryBears, don't overdo it to the point that you can't enjoy the holidays.
Be careful MaryBears, don't overdo it to the point that you can't enjoy the holidays.
Missingmeds
Just being
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time to rest and recuperate it sounds like to me MaryBears.
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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Parents Defination
AMNESIA: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.
BOTTLE FEEDING: an opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 AM too.
DEFENSE: what you'd better have around the yard if you're going to let the children play outside.
DROOLING: how teething babies wash their chins.
DUMB WAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
FAMILY PLANNING: the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you from falling into financial disaster.
FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when a baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
FULL NAME: what you call your child when you're mad at him.
GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
IMPREGNABLE: a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
LOOK OUT!: what it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.
OWWW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.
PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.
PREPARED CHILDBIRTH: a contradiction in terms.
PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes.
SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
STOREROOM: the distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.
TEMPER TANTRUMS: what you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.
THUNDERSTORM: a chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed.
TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
VERBAL: able to whine in words.
WEAKER SEX: the kind you have after the kids have worn you out.
WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house.
WHOOPS: an exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge".
.
AMNESIA: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.
BOTTLE FEEDING: an opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 AM too.
DEFENSE: what you'd better have around the yard if you're going to let the children play outside.
DROOLING: how teething babies wash their chins.
DUMB WAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
FAMILY PLANNING: the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you from falling into financial disaster.
FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when a baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
FULL NAME: what you call your child when you're mad at him.
GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
IMPREGNABLE: a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
LOOK OUT!: what it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.
OWWW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.
PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.
PREPARED CHILDBIRTH: a contradiction in terms.
PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes.
SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
STOREROOM: the distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.
TEMPER TANTRUMS: what you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.
THUNDERSTORM: a chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed.
TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
VERBAL: able to whine in words.
WEAKER SEX: the kind you have after the kids have worn you out.
WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house.
WHOOPS: an exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge".
.
kayte
This Was My Favorite Toy
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MaryBears said:ooops would help to put the pic....
{{{{{{{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}}} Wonderful to see you!!!
Please don't overdo. From someone who keeps doing just that as I unpack.
Thanks for the pic. That is so funny.
Have a good night's sleep when you go off to bed.
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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{{{{{{{{{{{{kayte}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} wonderful to see you too!!!!!!!!!!kayte said:{{{{{{{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}}} Wonderful to see you!!!
Please don't overdo. From someone who keeps doing just that as I unpack.
Thanks for the pic. That is so funny.
Have a good night's sleep when you go off to bed.
I am trying not to over do it....just have so much to do to get ready for the holidays
Missingmeds
Just being
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I got a real laugh out of the parents definitions MaryBears.
Good evening to everyone.
Good evening to everyone.
kayte
This Was My Favorite Toy
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}}}} So glad to see you are around.
I got the funds from the condo sale!!! One more step along the way.
Here is a funny for ya'll!!!
A Priest and a Rabbi Were on a Plane…
A priest and a rabbi were traveling on a plane. After a while the priest turned to the rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"
The rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."
The priest then asked, "Have you ever eaten pork?"
To which the rabbi replied, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb and tasted pork."
The priest nodded in understanding and went back to his reading. After a while the rabbi asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your faith that you remain celibate?"
The priest replied, "Yes that is still very much a part of our faith."
The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptation of the flesh?"
The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith."
The rabbi nodded understandingly for a moment and then said, "A lot better than pork, isn't it?"
I got the funds from the condo sale!!!
One more step along the way.Here is a funny for ya'll!!!
A Priest and a Rabbi Were on a Plane…
A priest and a rabbi were traveling on a plane. After a while the priest turned to the rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"
The rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."
The priest then asked, "Have you ever eaten pork?"
To which the rabbi replied, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb and tasted pork."
The priest nodded in understanding and went back to his reading. After a while the rabbi asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your faith that you remain celibate?"
The priest replied, "Yes that is still very much a part of our faith."
The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptation of the flesh?"
The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith."
The rabbi nodded understandingly for a moment and then said, "A lot better than pork, isn't it?"
kayte
This Was My Favorite Toy
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Here is another one for ya'll!!!
Undercover Clergy
A minister, a priest and a rabbi went for a hike one day. It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted when they came upon a small lake. Since it was fairly secluded, they took off all their clothes and jumped in the water.
Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom." As they were crossing an open area, who should come along but a group of ladies from town. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the minister and the priest covered their privates and the rabbi covered his face while they ran for cover.
After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the minister and the priest asked the rabbi why he covered his face rather than his privates. The rabbi replied, "I don't know about you, but in MY congregation, it's my face they would recognize."
Undercover Clergy
A minister, a priest and a rabbi went for a hike one day. It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted when they came upon a small lake. Since it was fairly secluded, they took off all their clothes and jumped in the water.
Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom." As they were crossing an open area, who should come along but a group of ladies from town. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the minister and the priest covered their privates and the rabbi covered his face while they ran for cover.
After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the minister and the priest asked the rabbi why he covered his face rather than his privates. The rabbi replied, "I don't know about you, but in MY congregation, it's my face they would recognize."
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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kayte said:{{{{{{{{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}}}} So glad to see you are around.
I got the funds from the condo sale!!!
Here is a funny for ya'll!!!
A Priest and a Rabbi Were on a Plane…
A priest and a rabbi were traveling on a plane. After a while the priest turned to the rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"
The rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."
The priest then asked, "Have you ever eaten pork?"
To which the rabbi replied, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb and tasted pork."
The priest nodded in understanding and went back to his reading. After a while the rabbi asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your faith that you remain celibate?"
The priest replied, "Yes that is still very much a part of our faith."
The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptation of the flesh?"
The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith."
The rabbi nodded understandingly for a moment and then said, "A lot better than pork, isn't it?"
{{{{{{{{{kayte}}}}}}}}}} yeah I am around.....Just been a lil busy.....but I finally got the apartment decorated with the help of my neice....And I made one batch of cookies today....I am getting there...slow but sure
Thanks for the jokes...I liked them...
Glad things is progressing for you...just don't over do it...
PassionsFlame
erotic mischief
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HAHAHHAHAAAAMaryBears said:
PassionsFlame
erotic mischief
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Thanks
Ihave been trying to catch up on all the jokes and pics I have missed.... love them ALL!
It is going okay~ have some RL family stuff going on, so some stress and have to cut short my weekend for it, so creative holdiday preparing will be going on next week. Just relaxing. Hope you are relaxing too {{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}MaryBears said:
Ihave been trying to catch up on all the jokes and pics I have missed.... love them ALL!
Missingmeds
Just being
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I like the picture MaryBears and thank you all for the jokes.
Good to see you Passion, and one step at a time kayte, that is the best way to go.
Good to see you Passion, and one step at a time kayte, that is the best way to go.
kayte
This Was My Favorite Toy
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Good morning ya'll.
Hope it is a great weekend for you. Here is a bit of a funny!!!
A Taxi Driver and a Priest Die…
A priest and taxi driver die on the same day.
St. Peter, who is standing at Heaven's gate, allows the taxi driver to proceed on to one of the highest levels of heaven but the priest has to wait.
He waits for a long time and finally goes to St. Peter and asks: "Why could that taxi driver go to the highest level of heaven and I, who all my life spoke about God, have to wait for such a long time?"
St. Peter replies: "When you were speaking to the people at your church, everybody was sleeping. But when that taxi driver was driving, everybody prayed!"
Hope it is a great weekend for you. Here is a bit of a funny!!!
A Taxi Driver and a Priest Die…
A priest and taxi driver die on the same day.
St. Peter, who is standing at Heaven's gate, allows the taxi driver to proceed on to one of the highest levels of heaven but the priest has to wait.
He waits for a long time and finally goes to St. Peter and asks: "Why could that taxi driver go to the highest level of heaven and I, who all my life spoke about God, have to wait for such a long time?"
St. Peter replies: "When you were speaking to the people at your church, everybody was sleeping. But when that taxi driver was driving, everybody prayed!"
kiltsr4guys
Really Experienced
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Cab
I was in that guys cab...........
I was in that guys cab...........
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