The Bears Den

[Missingmeds]

Thank you all for the jokes this evening. I needed the laugh.

 

[MaryBears]

Quote of the Year




"Life isn't like a box of chocolates...it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow."

 

[MaryBears]

Good evening all......Hope all had a good weekend.....

 

[MaryBears]

here is a thought......


BITCH = Beautiful Individual That Causes Hardons

 

[Puddin36]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Good evening everyone

{{{{{{{{{{{{Puddin}}}}}}}}}}}}}} your most welcome.....I really care about everyone and i hate to see people suffer.....I have a very soft heart.....and that gets me in trouble sometimes cause i care to much but in the end it is worth it cause at least I know that I am the best that I can be

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts MaryBears......it means alot. Things are lookin a little better, but I still have this week to see how things are going to turn out. I have been so depressed lately that I haven't gotten anything else done towards Christmas and it all seems to be piling up on me. I should be cleaning and addressing cards, and making Christmas treats, but here I sit with absolutely no ambition. Oh well................

I don't want to bring anyone else down, so I won't go on. Just know that I really appreciate everyones friendship and thoughts.

Puddin

 

[MaryBears]

Merry Christmas all

 

[MaryBears]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Good evening everyone

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts MaryBears......it means alot. Things are lookin a little better, but I still have this week to see how things are going to turn out. I have been so depressed lately that I haven't gotten anything else done towards Christmas and it all seems to be piling up on me. I should be cleaning and addressing cards, and making Christmas treats, but here I sit with absolutely no ambition. Oh well................

I don't want to bring anyone else down, so I won't go on. Just know that I really appreciate everyones friendship and thoughts.

Puddin

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Puddin}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} i know what it is like to be depressed.....I have clinical depression.....I got to the point that I had a couple of my doctors really concerned......It is not a good thing....Just remember....DO NOT KEEP YOURSELF LOCKED UP.....I did...I literally locked myself up in my apartment and hide from everyone.....And that was when they thru my ass into counsiling and on meds for it....SO I do understand having no ambition to do anything.....(((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))

 

[Puddin36]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Good evening everyone

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Puddin}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} i know what it is like to be depressed.....I have clinical depression.....I got to the point that I had a couple of my doctors really concerned......It is not a good thing....Just remember....DO NOT KEEP YOURSELF LOCKED UP.....I did...I literally locked myself up in my apartment and hide from everyone.....And that was when they thru my ass into counsiling and on meds for it....SO I do understand having no ambition to do anything.....(((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))

Thanks MaryBears, I too know all to well about depression. I have been on meds for about 14 years. I have been hospitalized 3 times, once because I tried to take my life. I have had years of counseling and I'm hoping that I can feel better without going that route again. It is so hard to start all over with a new counselor. Hopefully this too shall pass.......I'm not so depressed that I am wanting to harm myself, so I should be thankful, and I am. All I can do right now is take it a day at a time and sometimes an hour at a time. I'm thankful that I can come here and be amongst friends and know that I won't be judged. Plus reading all the jokes is a plus. So thanks for the hugs.......they truly mean alot.

Hugs, Puddin

 

[MaryBears]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Good evening everyone

Thanks MaryBears, I too know all to well about depression. I have been on meds for about 14 years. I have been hospitalized 3 times, once because I tried to take my life. I have had years of counseling and I'm hoping that I can feel better without going that route again. It is so hard to start all over with a new counselor. Hopefully this too shall pass.......I'm not so depressed that I am wanting to harm myself, so I should be thankful, and I am. All I can do right now is take it a day at a time and sometimes an hour at a time. I'm thankful that I can come here and be amongst friends and know that I won't be judged. Plus reading all the jokes is a plus. So thanks for the hugs.......they truly mean alot.

Hugs, Puddin

Your so very much welcome.....and that is why I created this thread....to be among friends and to have fun with jokes, pics and flirting......I truly believe laughter is the best medicine.....so that is why I try to share it with everyone

 

[Puddin36]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Good evening everyone

Your so very much welcome.....and that is why I created this thread....to be among friends and to have fun with jokes, pics and flirting......I truly believe laughter is the best medicine.....so that is why I try to share it with everyone

I'm really glad that I found your thread too MaryBears.

Hugs, Puddin

 

[Puddin36]

A cute story

A man was not really happy about his penis... it
> was actually too long 50cm long.
> He did not know what to do and went to a witch to
> ask for advice.
> The witch thought for a long time before she said:
> Walk into the forest and you will meet a frog. Ask the frog if it wants to
> marry you.
> If it says "no" your dick will shrink with 10cm,
> but if it says "yes",
> it will grow 10cm, so the risk is yours.
> The man thought about this for a while but decided
> it was worth the risk. He walked into the forest, found the frog and
> asked it:
> "Will you marry me little frog?" "No", said the
> frog. The man ran home and measured his dick. Happily he found that it had
> shrunk down to 40cm.
> The man was so excited about the results that he ran back into the
> forest and asked the frog again, "Will you marry me little frog?"
> "No", said the frog. The man ran home and measured his dick.
> Again he found that it had shrunk 10cm down to 30cm.
> The man was thinking, "20cm, that would be the
> perfect size" and ran back into the forest. He met the frog again and
> asked him again,
> "Will you marry me little frog?"
> The frog answered him, "Sweet Jesus, what is wrong with you?"
> I already told you NO! NO! NO!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>____________________________________________________

 

[Puddin36]

This is the attachment that was included, I'm hoping that I can insert it here as an attachment.

 

[MaryBears]

Re: A cute story

A man was not really happy about his penis... it
> was actually too long 50cm long.
> He did not know what to do and went to a witch to
> ask for advice.
> The witch thought for a long time before she said:
> Walk into the forest and you will meet a frog. Ask the frog if it wants to
> marry you.
> If it says "no" your dick will shrink with 10cm,
> but if it says "yes",
> it will grow 10cm, so the risk is yours.
> The man thought about this for a while but decided
> it was worth the risk. He walked into the forest, found the frog and
> asked it:
> "Will you marry me little frog?" "No", said the
> frog. The man ran home and measured his dick. Happily he found that it had
> shrunk down to 40cm.
> The man was so excited about the results that he ran back into the
> forest and asked the frog again, "Will you marry me little frog?"
> "No", said the frog. The man ran home and measured his dick.
> Again he found that it had shrunk 10cm down to 30cm.
> The man was thinking, "20cm, that would be the
> perfect size" and ran back into the forest. He met the frog again and
> asked him again,
> "Will you marry me little frog?"
> The frog answered him, "Sweet Jesus, what is wrong with you?"
> I already told you NO! NO! NO!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>____________________________________________________

ROFLMFAO.....that was so funny....thanks Puddin..... and now i am off to bed.

 

[Puddin36]

Late night chuckles

Here is a cute pic.

 

[Puddin36]

Here's another one

Hope it is okay to post these MaryBears.

 

[Puddin36]

Last one for tonight!!!!!

Hugs to all..........Puddin

 

[MaryBears]

Re: Here's another one

Hope it is okay to post these MaryBears.

OMG ROFLMFAO those was so good.....I loved them....and yes it is okay to post those......Thanks for the chuckles.......(((((((((((((((((((((((Puddin))))))))))))))))))))))))))

 

[FRENCHIE44T]

Love the signature MaryBears

 

[MaryBears]

OMF I am ROFLMFAO.........I hope this don't offend anyone....

Christmas In West Virginia

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the shack
Not a creature was stirrin', cept the lice on muh back.
The Skoal cans wuz nailed to the screen door with care,
With hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.
The children were sleepin', all snug in their beds,
While visions of tractor pulls danced in their heads.
And Ma in her nightgown all stained with pound cake.
Had just settled down to watch Ricki Lake.
When out in the driveway, a loud noise I heard,
I opened the winder to check muh T-bird.
I ran to the door, like I's on a mission,
But I tripped on some parts from muh granny's transmission.
The moon shone outside, the hound dog wuz barkin'.
Muh daughter weren't home yet, she wuz still out parkin'.
When what to muh whiskey blind eyes should I see
But a Chevy S-10, pulled by eight flyin' sheep.
With a fat nasty driver, so disgustin' and sick
I said, "Shoot Fire! That must be St. Nick!
More rapid than X-lax his wooly sheep came
And he belched and he hollered, and he called 'em by name.
Now CLIFFORD! Now VERNON! Now LESTER and ENUS!
On FESTUS! On ELMER! On ROSCOE and CLETUS!
From the top of the shack to them there garbage bins
Now Dash Away! Dash Away! Dash Away youins!
I heard a loud sound on the roof of muh shack.
Pud down muh beer and went fer muh gun rack.
He fell through the roof, plum killed my dog,
I swear that ole' Santa looked just like Boss Hog.
He wore a T-shirt, rebel flag on the front,
And his jeans were all bloody from that morning's hunt.
A big nekkid lady tattooed on his arm,
And he wore black boots that he'd picked up in 'Nam.
His eyes, how they glazed from too much Wild Turkey.
From the side of his mouth hung a stick of beef jerky.
A scar on his cheek from a fight with the cops.
The veins on his fac e looked ready to pop.
The butt of a Marlboro clung to his lip
He wore a hip pack full of B-B-Q chips.
He had a fat face and a hairy beer belly.
I ain't seen one that big since muh ex-wife Shelly.
He was gap-toothed and dumb with an I.Q. of three
And I laughed cause that redneck was smarter than me.
A wink of his eye, a fierce shake of his head,
From his hair came a rat that ran under the bed.
He reached in his sack, sipped his gin and tonic,
Then filled the kid's stockings with Hooked on Phonics.
His toys came from Big Lots and they weren't very nice
But he had lots of them and yuh can't beat the price.
He gave us a tape of them hound dogs that sing Jingle Bells.
Some Crisco, some Spam, some Oatmeal Cream pies,
And a Nascar T-shirt in Double X size.
When the presents were gone and he had no more,
He staggered and stumbled right through muh screen door.
He hopped in his truck, t o his sheep gave an order
"Hurry up youins! To the Tennessee border!"
And I heard him cry out, with a strong southern drawl,
"MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU REDNECKS! MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL... YEE HAWWWW!

 

[MaryBears]

Love the signature MaryBears

Thanks Frenchie OMG I Love the AV.........mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 

[MaryBears]

Turn up your speakers and have a good laugh


Santa's Pickup Lines

 

[MaryBears]

Christmas Cake Ingredients:
1 cup water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
1 bottle Jose Quervo Tequilla
2 cups dried fruit

Taste the Quervo to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the Quervo again to be sure it is of the
highest
quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl
one teaspoon of sugar .. beat again.

At this point it's best to make sure the Quervo is still OK, try another
cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit,
pick
the frigging fruit off floor mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a
drewscriver.

Sample the Quervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something .. Who creally rares?

Check the Jose Quervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table.
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the
oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to
beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window .. finish the Jose Quervo.
CHERRY MISTMAS!

 

[Puddin36]

Re: Re: Here's another one

OMG ROFLMFAO those was so good.....I loved them....and yes it is okay to post those......Thanks for the chuckles.......(((((((((((((((((((((((Puddin))))))))))))))))))))))))))

{{{{{{{{{{{{MARYBEARS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Glad that you liked the attachments........I found them to be funny myself and as you can see, I chose one of them as my new AV.
Hope that you had a good day and look forward to talking to you again soon. BTW.........starting to feel better here!!!!!

Hugs to all...........Puddin

 

[PassionsFlame]

Re: Good evening everyone

Thanks MaryBears, I too know all to well about depression. I have been on meds for about 14 years. I have been hospitalized 3 times, once because I tried to take my life. I have had years of counseling and I'm hoping that I can feel better without going that route again. It is so hard to start all over with a new counselor. Hopefully this too shall pass.......I'm not so depressed that I am wanting to harm myself, so I should be thankful, and I am. All I can do right now is take it a day at a time and sometimes an hour at a time. I'm thankful that I can come here and be amongst friends and know that I won't be judged. Plus reading all the jokes is a plus. So thanks for the hugs.......they truly mean alot.

Hugs, Puddin

(((((((Puddin))))))) I will just say briefly that I have also been there (meds, hospitals, works in the past), and sending you hugs. It is amazing, when I see Mary share her heart as she did and others, that the people here are very special. Hang in there.... *slow sigh* I just had a rough weekend myself and this season has brought our family tough times and some good things. I will have a hard time getting myself together- to get things done, but am glad to have a shoulder or two here to lay ona nd then laugh at some silly jokes. So will hang in there and you hang in there- as I know you are *hugs*

 

[PassionsFlame]

Re: Good evening everyone

Your so very much welcome.....and that is why I created this thread....to be among friends and to have fun with jokes, pics and flirting......I truly believe laughter is the best medicine.....so that is why I try to share it with everyone

((((((((Mary))))))) you have done that and more. Your heart is big and open and I am honored to call you friend and to have found the Den... I may not be able to keep up, but love to visit anyway