The unappreciated limerick

[AlinaX]

My tongue licked him clean in the wake
Of all of the cream he could make
Me nine to his six
With fresh blood in the mix
He sure learned from his bad mistake

 

[cdstefi]

What joy is in being a man
When denim can't do what silk can?
Let's ban all but hose
And demand that one's rose
Be covered by naught but a fan

Silk, satin and lace all arouse
Whilst in them I play and carouse
I'll always contend
That my cock will extend
For as far as the fabric allows

 

[cdstefi]

My tongue licked him clean in the wake
Of all of the cream he could make
Me nine to his six
With fresh blood in the mix
He sure learned from his bad mistake

Young men, learn from Madame Alina
To keep your relationship cleaner
Lest acting like goats
And broadcasting your oats
Should show you her side that's far meaner

 

[cdstefi]

There was a young fellow named Jacques
Who had quite an amazing cock.
You see, it hung to his knee
And he could use it to pee
Or secretly sneak up a frock.

Works better if he's called Jock! And he'd have his own frock.

 

[cdstefi]

Adulterer! Beware of Alina
She'll take you to worse than the cleaner
Whilst a divorce action
May provide satisfaction
For her taste, the blade is far keener

 

[AlinaX]

Holdups and stockings are best
And never a cock will arrest
For tights in the end
We simply can't mend
And why skimp at being underdressed?

 

[Blueskiessmiling]

The British women are gems
As they strut along the Thames
I admire their bods
With winks and nods
They ought to wear diadems.

 

[Tedfkats]

There once was a lady named Jill
Who tried a grenade for a thrill
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
And bits of her tits in Brazil.


(Stolen, but too good to not post)

 

[cdstefi]

Holdups and stockings are best
And never a cock will arrest
For tights in the end
We simply can't mend
And why skimp at being underdressed?

Tights are the labour of Satan
They're useless for hard masturbatin'
You can't be enrapt
When your cock is half-trapped
In constructs of high-denier ratin'

 

[Tessinwales]

There was a young girl named McGrewer
Who poxed every man that went through her
The smell from her twat once poisoned a rat
That'd lived all it's life in a sewer.

 

[Blueskiessmiling]

At the beach she liked being bare
She shed ‘em with nary a care
The guys sometimes gawked
Some even stalked
‘Twas women who’d jealously stare.

 

[EbonySplash]

At the beach she liked being bare
She shed ‘em with nary a care
The guys sometimes gawked
Some even stalked
‘Twas women who’d jealously stare.

She is bare on the beach as she's walking
The guys, with their eyes, they are stalking
They should be on their toes,
'cuz she's not just "no clothes"
She's seeking a good hard bare cocking

 

[AlinaX]

She isn't just curves and a hole
In search of a lusty hard pole
Objectification
On such a vacation
Is not the sunbather's true goal

 

[Blueskiessmiling]

She isn't just curves and a hole
In search of a lusty hard pole
Objectification
On such a vacation
Is not the sunbather's true goal

The men liked seeing her nude
Some of their comments were crude
She shrugged them off
With a sneer and a scoff
No matter how hard they pursued.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Once a guy was a little too keen
While shoving his cock in between
His girl’s parted lips
‘Twas one of those slips
And said, “wow, you’re tight there, Justine”

 

[Bamagan]

The fellow believed he was deft
With cock lodged in his lady's cleft
"Those holes aren't the same!"
she snarled as he came,
but farted and laughed when he left.

 

[EmilyMiller]

There was a new wife who said why,
Should I not have a fuck while I fly?
So she winked at her groom
Took him to the restroom
And they both joined the club that’s mile high

 

[GirlFur]

There was a new wife who said why,
Should I not have a fuck while I fly?
So she winked at her groom
Took him to the restroom
And they both joined the club that’s mile high

I'm certain your lim'rick is trusted
And no doubt the young wife was well-lusted
But they had a surprise
As they bred in the skies
When you fuck on a plane you get busted

 

[cdstefi]

There was a new wife who said why,
Should I not have a fuck while I fly?
So she winked at her groom
Took him to the restroom
And they both joined the club that’s mile high

This adventurous mile-high lass
Gave her husband his "boarding" pass
It felt close to heaven
In the 777
As he mounted her beautiful ass

 

[cdstefi]

I'm certain your lim'rick is trusted
And no doubt the young wife was well-lusted
But they had a surprise
As they bred in the skies
When you fuck on a plane you get busted

The stewardess sure was suspicious
Of a couple so clearly lubricious
The view she received
As they panted and heaved
Was illegal but rather delicious

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'm certain your lim'rick is trusted
And no doubt the young wife was well-lusted
But they had a surprise
As they bred in the skies
When you fuck on a plane you get busted

Not me. So far…

Em

 

[GirlFur]

Not me. So far…

Em

Knock on wood

 

[Blueskiessmiling]

For that rarified mile-high club
You don’t need a ticket stub
Once at flight level
You change to a devil
Then you play Domme or play sub.

 

[Trionyx]

Off to old England travels our Em,
Who prefers flying to a big swim.
High over the sea,
In the WC,
Her girl parts become known as her quim.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Off to old England travels our Em,
Who prefers flying to a big swim.
High over the sea,
In the WC,
Her girl parts become known as her quim.

<confused>