Things you NEVER want to hear while having sex

[Crownvic]

Sorry..your time is up!

 

[loquere]

We're no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it
Inside we both know what's been going on
We know the game and we're gonna play it
And if you ask me how I'm feeling
Don't tell me you're too blind to see
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a…

 

[loquere]

If you stop fucking me a bomb will go off killing thousands.

 

[loquere]

Pee on me

 

[loquere]

Poo on me

 

[loquere]

Stab me deep you little bitch

 

[loquere]

Eat my muddy asshole

 

[loquere]

Let's go fuck on top of your mothers grave.

 

[Jada59]

You smell like baby diarrhea

I just spit a Triscuit!

 

[loquere]

Fuck me with your tiny soft pecker, why are you crying like a little bitch?

 

[Jada59]

I didn't know you were into water sports! Or... Is that a leak coming from upstairs?

 

[loquere]

I didn't do it, you did it.

 

[loquere]

Wait..... You want kids? I hate the little fucks, I'm out. I'm gonna need my sperm back bitch, scoop it out, you sperm thief.

 

[Jada59]

What in the hell is my dick stuck on?

 

[loquere]

What in the hell is my dick stuck on?

My grand-mother, she wanted to join.

 

[seth6138]

Her; "are you in yet?"
Me; "in, I'm done!"

 

[loquere]

Fuck me like you screw your customers, mr Banker man.

 

[loquere]

If you don't fuck me right, I will snuff you out in your sleep.

 

[Jada59]

Let me make love to my Teddy bear first. It's my favorite form of foreplay!

 

[loquere]

Let's ask Pastor Smith if he'd like to be our third.

 

[loquere]

What's that red stuff you're covered in?

 

[Jada59]

Did you just put your chocolate in my peanut butter?

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Aaaaand - CUT! Don't forget to splice that laugh track in...

 

[loquere]

Aaaaand - CUT! Don't forget to splice that laugh track in...

LMFAO!

 

[loquere]

Your cat ran away