things you shouldn't say

[CafeBleu]

I guess you're wondering how I ended up naked and hand-cuffed to a lamp-post, huh?

TYSS when receiving an Oscar.

LOL

I'd like to thank the guy who held up my cue cards, and the director whom I shagged to get the part...

TYSS on a first date?

 

[LustfulOne50]

I guess you're wondering how I ended up naked and hand-cuffed to a lamp-post, huh?

TYSS when receiving an Oscar.

I want to thank my mistress.

TYSS when being stopped by a cop.

 

[thinking_theo]

LOL

I'd like to thank the guy who held up my cue cards, and the director whom I shagged to get the part...

TYSS on a first date?

everthing has been cured....i think.

TYSS to an alaskan.

 

[CafeBleu]

I want to thank my mistress.

TYSS when being stopped by a cop.

Fuck me you're ugly

everthing has been cured....i think.

TYSS to an alaskan.

How long have you had electric lights then?

TYSS to a fire fighter when your house is on fire

 

[LustfulOne50]

Fuck me you're ugly



How long have you had electric lights then?

TYSS to a fire fighter when your house is on fire

Let it burn it belong to her.

TYSS: when ordering a drink

 

[CafeBleu]

Let it burn it belong to her.

TYSS: when ordering a drink

This time without the urine chaser please

TYSS when taking out health insurance

 

[Black_Dahlia]

This time without the urine chaser please

TYSS when taking out health insurance

Are you sure having sex with all of you is the only way you'll believe I don't have a history of heart trouble?

TYSS to your vet...

 

[CafeBleu]

Are you sure having sex with all of you is the only way you'll believe I don't have a history of heart trouble?

TYSS to your vet...

...and so that's how I managed to get stuck in Fido!

TYSS to your prospective mother/father-in-law?

 

[Mrtenant]

This time without the urine chaser please

TYSS when taking out health insurance

I have diabetes, asthma, sleep apnea, cancer, TB, HIV, MS, MD, and a smorgasborg cocktail of Ebola, Tetnus, Hepatitus, and the Flu.

Might not get it with all or any of that. Just saying.

TYSS when the ship is sinking?


a little slow on the reply apparently.....crap

 

[ravi64]

...and so that's how I managed to get stuck in Fido!

TYSS to your prospective mother/father-in-law?

your child is not good in bed

TYSNS to your dom

 

[CafeBleu]

your child is not good in bed

TYSNS to your dom

No, I won't!

TYSS to your best friend's spouse?

 

[ravi64]

No, I won't!

TYSS to your best friend's spouse?

dont tell your spouse but i wanna fuck you

TYSS to your own sub

 

[CafeBleu]

dont tell your spouse but i wanna fuck you

TYSS to your own sub

Yes mistress!

TYSS to your bank manager

 

[ravi64]

Yes mistress!

TYSS to your bank manager

dont give me an overdraft


TYSS to the cute class teacher

 

[CafeBleu]

dont give me an overdraft


TYSS to the cute class teacher

Can I sit in on your Human Biology lessons, yes I know I'm 44 but.....

TYSS to a bartender

 

[Black_Dahlia]

Can I sit in on your Human Biology lessons, yes I know I'm 44 but.....

TYSS to a bartender

Which one's the rohypnol in?

TYSS when seeing someone naked for the first time.

 

[ravi64]

Which one's the rohypnol in?

TYSS when seeing someone naked for the first time.

your ass seems bigger then before


TYSS when you meet someone on lit who has been missing you

 

[SJZ76]

your ass seems bigger then before


TYSS when you meet someone on lit who has been missing you

"Um..... remind me who you are?"

TYSS to your family doctor....

 

[Husker1987]

"Um..... remind me who you are?"

TYSS to your family doctor....

Can you tell me if my wife and I have the same DNA?

TYSS to a carnival worker

 

[Black_Dahlia]

Can you tell me if my wife and I have the same DNA?

TYSS to a carnival worker

You work with your sister and your wife? Oh, I see... they're the same person...

TYSS in your wedding vows.

 

[CafeBleu]

You work with your sister and your wife? Oh, I see... they're the same person...

TYSS in your wedding vows.

Until someone better turns up

TYSS To a cab driver?

 

[Black_Dahlia]

Until someone better turns up

TYSS To a cab driver?

Hey, I thought you wanted a tip, not a tit...

TYSS at a nudist camp.

 

[butters]

Hey, I thought you wanted a tip, not a tit...

TYSS at a nudist camp.

sometimes don't you just wish you were blind?

TYSS to the local peeping tom

 

[justaguymass]

TYSS to the local peeping tom

Why dont you come on over and take a peek at it.

TYSS to your proctologist?

 

[Black_Dahlia]

Why dont you come on over and take a peek at it.

TYSS to your proctologist?

If you're hands are on my shoulders, what's pushing that thing in my ass?

TYSS in a sex shop...