What Are You Nosey About Today?? 🦝

[SassySheDevil]

I’ve been climbing the walls here in lockdown. Craving human connection, intimacy and a good fucking. It’s been since what, the beginning of August? I’ve literally felt despair about the lack of dick inside me.

8 or 9 years is beyond my realm of imagining. I don’t know how this timeframe spins out like this and I’m sure there are all sorts of reasons, but I really feel like it’s time to rectify it isn’t it? Take stock of your sexual needs and desires. Get out into the world and get what you crave from it.

lol that reminded me of a medication I was on for a short time. My hormones were off the wall. I was so horny, I told my Doctor that I was either going to screw every delivery person that dared to enter my property, or start carving fun things into my trees.

If I lowered them any further, you might get lucky

lol

Why the hell aren't all these sexy lit folks closer together. We'd have these issues sorted in a week. Tops.

or a lot of babies

 

[Ratchetman1982]

Oooo another one to add to the list.

*puts sexy voice on* Hi Ratchet

*Puts on squeaky puberty voice*. Hi Amber!!

 

[AmberLGreen]

Hands up if you’ve paid for sex.


*raises hand*


I’m just saying there are other much less complex avenues to sexual satisfaction if the nuances of a relationship are not appealing or one is hard to find.

I would quite happily pay for it but I wouldn’t even know where to start looking or what to type in to google to find it.

If anybody in England knows of where I can purchase a service, please let me know.

 

[AmberLGreen]

*hurriedly makes an Amazon order*

It does add a whole new meaning to the phrase “I’ll have what she’s having”

 

[cheekygirl75]

Cobwebbed genitalia - it could catch on

….

 

[Ratchetman1982]

I would quite happily pay for it but I wouldn’t even know where to start looking or what to type in to google to find it.

If anybody in England knows of where I can purchase a service, please let me know.

All of the vajazzle I bought for you is going to waste

 

[Fingerfuxs]

If I lowered them any further, you might get lucky

You’ll have to use your imagination , solid words and luster. I like a lack luster effort.

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

Just realized it’s been 9 for me

About 9 for me also. But I don't think I count lol

Sorry *bows out of thread quietly*

 

[AmberLGreen]

About 9 for me also. But I don't think I count lol

Sorry *bows out of thread quietly*

You can have a badge too Nev

 

[JerseyJade]

Hold me.

Lol

 

[cheekygirl75]

About 9 for me also. But I don't think I count lol

Sorry *bows out of thread quietly*

Why not? We’ve got badges for our 5+ years club! Everyone’s welcome to join, though we hope none of us stay long

 

[Ratchetman1982]

Plane tickets to England are expensive!

 

[Fingerfuxs]

I would quite happily pay for it but I wouldn’t even know where to start looking or what to type in to google to find it.

If anybody in England knows of where I can purchase a service, please let me know.

Don’t you have a English Vegas , or Jersey boardwalk type place that people get their sexy on. Or plenty of xxxx fish dating sites for singles.

Bamble or Twitter

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

Why not? We’ve got badges for our 5+ years club! Everyone’s welcome to join, though we hope none of us stay long

Ah you ladies just have standards and haven't met people worthy of your llove and lust. I'm...just not good enough. I suppose a badge might look nice on my leather jacket though. I'll take one.

 

[WerdNerd]

I feel for all you ladies who haven't had dick in years. I feel your pain. I can't even think how many years it's been since my dick has felt the warm embrace of a sweet wet pussy.

We need to arrange some kind of exchange program.

And as far as paying for sex. I think it would be great if there was a safe discrete way to just pay for a good fuck.

 

[AmberLGreen]

Ah you ladies just have standards and haven't met people worthy of your llove and lust. I'm...just not good enough. I suppose a badge might look nice on my leather jacket though. I'll take one.

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

 

[Ratchetman1982]

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

Does that mean I have a chance?

 

[JerseyJade]

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

Lmao!

Thanks for the visual, Amber.

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

I have no idea what the proper response to this might be. I try to be witty and clever, but this one stumped me. Want an invite to my funeral? This might be the only chance to ever get laid again, for me.

 

[Deleted member 5521640]

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

Hmmm... I honestly hadn't thought of this!

<slowly takes notes> ...right... stage... of... rigor... mortis

 

[Lonelywife1205]

I love the ladies on this thread! Well, the men too, but you ladies crack me up and keep me smiling.

 

[Orchidea73]

I’m nosey about e-boning and long distance e-boning in particular.

Asking for a friend (of course) do you e-boners have any toys that are controlled by your e-bone partner by an app? If so… wanna share those details and reviews? Also happy to take info by PM.


FOR MY FRIEND OF COURSE. *points at friend*

I have no e-boning partner but even if I had one I wouldn't use any app.

 

[Xerxes82]

I have no standards. I would fuck a corpse right now (at the right stage of rigor mortis)

If anybody notices the "Necromancy" category books missing from their local library, it was probably Amber reading up.

I sympathize, I do. I miss sex so much. But then I turned it down when I last had the chance, because she wanted to date and I just wanted to fuck and I didn't want to lead her on.

So now I'm kind of torn on the whole subject. I'm seriously considering celibacy as a lifestyle choice. Just seems less problematic overall.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

I’m nosey about e-boning and long distance e-boning in particular.

Asking for a friend (of course) do you e-boners have any toys that are controlled by your e-bone partner by an app? If so… wanna share those details and reviews? Also happy to take info by PM.


FOR MY FRIEND OF COURSE. *points at friend*

I don't have any such thing, but I do have a friend who has a Lovense Lush (I'll have to ask her if it's the Lush 2 or 3 - I do know it was a relatively recent purchase). She swears by it. Loudly and frequently, it seems.

 

[AlexBailey]

In all fairness I have only been separated for 8 months so it is still very new to me and lockdown meant no socialising for much of that. I did have a couple of dates with the same guy but when I kissed him, I didn’t feel it. Not even one tiny fanny flutter.

I went for two years without sex after my first wife. My new wife knew it had been a long time for me and figured it was going to be a quickie - boy was she surprised! It's all about self care, dear Amber.

Mind you, it wasn't a complete drought. I had a few dates and some fun times, but I wasn't going to give my heart to just any yummy piece of meat. After divorce was probably my most discerning time of life.

If I were single now I'd be a complete nympho!