What's your take?

[Trekka]

...And I like this thread btw So thank you for starting it!

 

[IhateClowns]

...And I like this thread btw So thank you for starting it!

I always like discussions as long as they don't turn ugly. Hopefully we can keep it positive, but fresh.

 

[coffeelady]

There are a lot of people who have had success in the online dating world,

I think success in online dating is just the luck of the draw, same as meeting someone in real life. It's about being in the right place at the right time.

 

[MaryanneB]

OK, if we're talking about online dating then we have another dating situation called "Well Meaning Friends". Don't get me wrong. I have some wonderful friends and I know they love me BUT they think they're helping when I meet them for dinner and they just happen to have an extra man who is a widower and I spend the evening trying to be nice when they find I'm a nurse and want advice about their prostate problems.
Lit makes more sense. I have been asked for help jacking off or what does my pussy look like. But I've never been asked about a guy's prostate.

 

[IhateClowns]

I think success in online dating is just the luck of the draw, same as meeting someone in real life. It's about being in the right place at the right time.

I agree. I just don't like those that bitch about not meeting anyone, but don't put themselves in the positions to do so.

 

[IhateClowns]

OK, if we're talking about online dating then we have another dating situation called "Well Meaning Friends". Don't get me wrong. I have some wonderful friends and I know they love me BUT they think they're helping when I meet them for dinner and they just happen to have an extra man who is a widower and I spend the evening trying to be nice when they find I'm a nurse and want advice about their prostate problems.
Lit makes more sense. I have been asked for help jacking off or what does my pussy look like. But I've never been asked about a guy's prostate.

Speaking of prostates I have been called an asshole numerous times. Is there any cures for this illness, or am I just fucked?

 

[Trekka]

Lit makes more sense. I have been asked for help jacking off or what does my pussy look like. But I've never been asked about a guy's prostate.

Ba ha ha ha

But what if I have questions about a guy's prostate? PM me?

 

[RoyceConnors]

I think on line can be better in ways than RL dating. Online requires more conversation and as such, allows both parties to know more about each other than in RL. There's no rushing to get to first base or even the first kiss. The relationship isn't based on sex, where most end up failing when the thrill is gone. Sex is the last thing that happens on line, as opposed to the 3 date rule in RL, where they stay on their best behaviour to get in each others pants.

 

[coffeelady]

I agree. I just don't like those that bitch about not meeting anyone, but don't put themselves in the positions to do so.

Definitely. It can be easy to become discouraged, though, particularly for those who aren't that outgoing and don't feel comfortable striking up a conversation with a stranger, or don't want to hang out at bars or clubs (or wherever you meet people - like I'd know! ). When you see what's on the online dating sites, sometimes it is just easier to give up!

 

[IhateClowns]

It can be easy to become discouraged, though, particularly for those who aren't that outgoing and don't feel comfortable striking up a conversation with a stranger, or don't want to hang out at bars or clubs (or wherever you meet people - like I'd know! ). When you see what's on the online dating sites, sometimes it is just easier to give up!

I am talking about those who don't even put themselves out there online either. They would rather just complain about anything and everything. Then wonder why no one is interested in getting to know them better. negativity breeds negativity. If you're constantly negative you aren't going to get very far. I used to be overtly negative. It took someone telling me I was always bitching and moaning for me to figure out why I was attracting women who weren't well put together mentally or emotionally.

 

[Trekka]

I agree. I just don't like those that bitch about not meeting anyone, but don't put themselves in the positions to do so.

Completely agree. My BFF is gorgeous and single, and she complains all the time about not having a date. But I still love her to death She's scared to put herself out there, and I can understand why. She's single by choice, imho.

Speaking of prostates I have been called an asshole numerous times. Is there any cures for this illness, or am I just fucked?

Just own it, it's not necessarily a bad thing

http://cdn.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/thanks-for-being-just-enough-of-an-asshole-to-make-work-more-pleasant--1eb32.png

I think on line can be better in ways than RL dating. Online requires more conversation and as such, allows both parties to know more about each other than in RL. There's no rushing to get to first base or even the first kiss. The relationship isn't based on sex, where most end up failing when the thrill is gone. Sex is the last thing that happens on line, as opposed to the 3 date rule in RL, where they stay on their best behaviour to get in each others pants.

http://static.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/71bb8604abd4f05ba2d9d4f76cc3f635_51d2e8f8052a4.png

 

[coffeelady]

I am talking about those who don't even put themselves out there online either. They would rather just complain about anything and everything. Then wonder why no one is interested in getting to know them better. negativity breeds negativity. If you're constantly negative you aren't going to get very far. I used to be overtly negative. It took someone telling me I was always bitching and moaning for me to figure out why I was attracting women who weren't well put together mentally or emotionally.

Completely agree. It's often easier to complain about something than address the underlying problem. And it means they don't have to put themselves in the position of possible rejection (in terms of giving dating a chance).

 

[IhateClowns]

Completely agree. It's often easier to complain about something than address the underlying problem. And it means they don't have to put themselves in the position of possible rejection (in terms of giving dating a chance).

I know if I were single I would certainly try online dating. I have seen the pros and heard the cons of it. I just find everyone's take on the subject very interesting.

 

[THROBBS]

I know if I were single I would certainly try online dating. I have seen the pros and heard the cons of it. I just find everyone's take on the subject very interesting.

Me too.
Thank you, youhateclowns for an engaging thread.


I am married too.

I think that I might try on-line dating if I were not.

I would definitely try LIT (though it is not overtly a dating site), because I know that my sexual happiness is a very important part of my life and LIT members are (to some degree) more open to sexual possibilities.

I hate bars. I do not drink and do not care for drunk people. I imagine that I would test the waters of my favorite cafés and book stores. Generally, a books store is a kind of filter — more intelligent/literate folk there. Both cafés and book stores have customers who are gainfully employed and some mutual interest, even if I like mocha's and she likes tea (or latte).

 

[beachbaby179]

Wait... you mean Lit isn't an online dating site? Damn. I'm doing it all wrong. Just kidding.

But as someone who's ABOUT to be single, dating terrifies me. I'm an introvert by nature and I love the idea of online interaction in getting to know someone. It's much easier for me (less stressful) to open up to someone first online - then when/if we get to meet each other in person it's like we know each other already somehow. And hopefully less awkward.

 

[IhateClowns]

For those of you who would rather online date to et to know someone first, aren't you concerned with either them or you not living up to the expectations set when you meet in rea life? We always share our best versions of ourselves online. Whether it is a picture from a certain angle or certain lighting, to the best parts about our personalities and daily experiences.

Is there fear of them letting you down or even worse you letting them down not living up to the "hype"?

 

[Trekka]

For those of you who would rather online date to et to know someone first, aren't you concerned with either them or you not living up to the expectations set when you meet in rea life? We always share our best versions of ourselves online. Whether it is a picture from a certain angle or certain lighting, to the best parts about our personalities and daily experiences.

Is there fear of them letting you down or even worse you letting them down not living up to the "hype"?

Can't this phenomenon occur in "real life" too though?

 

[beachbaby179]

For those of you who would rather online date to et to know someone first, aren't you concerned with either them or you not living up to the expectations set when you meet in rea life? We always share our best versions of ourselves online. Whether it is a picture from a certain angle or certain lighting, to the best parts about our personalities and daily experiences.

Is there fear of them letting you down or even worse you letting them down not living up to the "hype"?

Absolutely. I try to be honest with people - they think I'm putting myself down - but I'm just injecting some reality into the situation. I guess we'll see...

 

[IhateClowns]

Can't this phenomenon occur in "real life" too though?

Sure in certain contexts, but for instance physical attraction. We share our best photos. Our best versions of ourselves. We don't share the zits or the moles or the blemishes or whatever. Are there ever concerns of either letting someone down or being let down yourself if you prefer online dating?

 

[BreezySnow]

I am single, I have tried online dating, some good, some not so good. The one thing I learned from online dating is you definitely want to talk to the person a lot and get to know them. If they aren't willing to open up and eventually talk on the phone and share photos then move on! I haven't had any successes through the dating sights, but haven't had much success off the dating sights either! I go back and check them out every once in awhile, but I am in a very rural area and it is hard to find people close enough to me to actually date.

 

[JennyNo1]

I've had all kinds of experiences with online, all the way from getting tangled up with one of those Nigerian scam artists (No money changed hands! ) to meeting a very nice guy whom I had a great relationship with for a couple of years. I think online is similar in a lot of ways to "real life", it's just another way of meeting. You might, however, get a better picture of the "inner" person online, if they've done a good job with their profile. One thing it does is expose you to a whole lot of people you wouldn't meet otherwise. That said, there's a reason I wouldn't meet most of them - a lot of them are not the kind of people I'd have any interest in hanging around with.

 

[coffeelady]

Is there fear of them letting you down or even worse you letting them down not living up to the "hype"?

For sure. There have been a couple of cases where I've met people and we've chatted a lot before meeting, and there seemed to be a real connection, but when we met in person, it just wasn't there. It's disappointing, but it comes with the territory.

 

[THROBBS]

For sure. There have been a couple of cases where I've met people and we've chatted a lot before meeting, and there seemed to be a real connection, but when we met in person, it just wasn't there. It's disappointing, but it comes with the territory.

There's chemistry and there's alchemy.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Sure in certain contexts, but for instance physical attraction. We share our best photos. Our best versions of ourselves. We don't share the zits or the moles or the blemishes or whatever. Are there ever concerns of either letting someone down or being let down yourself if you prefer online dating?

Crap. I share the zits and moles.

 

[RoyceConnors]

Nothing like live video chat to remove any doubts about looks and dated pics. Just like talking face to face with same ability to get naked and play if they want. Only thing left after that is physical contact to finalize it all. If two people are serious about hooking up, on line makes it easier with busy lives and lifestyles to stay in contact during the day. It can't ever replace RL in terms of true intimate relationship, but as some say, it's easier to open up in the comfort and privacy of your own space, instead of face to face.