Why Is Sex Dirty?

[Recidiva]

You really need chocolate, don't you?

You're the one not wanting a confrontation. What's the matter, honey, can't take it?

Let me tell you explicitly what you can do with your chocolate.

There might be tickling.

 

[Aurora Black]

You're the one not wanting a confrontation. What's the matter, honey, can't take it?

Let me tell you explicitly what you can do with your chocolate.

There might be tickling.

Bring it on.

 

[Recidiva]

Bring it on.

People who like dirty are fun. They squirm a lot. I like squirming.

 

[Aurora Black]

People who like dirty are fun. They squirm a lot. I like squirming.

DEELicious! (Are we threadjacking? )

 

[Recidiva]

DEELicious! (Are we threadjacking? )

I'm kinda making my point, but we can stop now. We know where to have bad sex. Nudge, nudge, say no more.

 

[Guest]

I'm not arguing, you were just saying that *I* missed the point

I totally get this. I don't think it can be separated out for a lot of people. They want to feel dirty.

But to me it's a specific turn on. I wouldn't call it a fetish, but I would call it a specific preference.

I like shameless, I like honest. I'm not asking you to conform, for me it's practically separate genders. I'm not trying to sleep with you or change you. We're not missing the point and it's not scared or anything. It's just shameless.

There's shamesexual and shamelesssexual. I'm just not into it, but I've had it explained to me in detail enough that I get it. Same as I know there are gay men here and I get the mechanics. I don't have the right equipment for it (brain) and that's not the way I swing.

Ok, fair enough! I fully understand where you're coming from.

My point in saying you'd missed the point merely the fact that some said, "Sex isn't dirty" (and I don't even think it was you that said that!). That was a blanket statement that obviously isn't true.

Yep, fair enough, to you, the sex you partake in and enjoy isn't dirty, but there's obviously those of us who do like sex to be down and dirty.

And what's all this about "shameless" and "shameful"? I find no shame whatsoever in the kind of sex I enjoy - even at its most filthy extremes ("play" rape/abduction - whatever).

I'm not at all ashamed of my sexuality and don't find the pure, basic act, of sex at all dirty. Sex is the most natural thing in the world, and nothing at all to be ashamed about.

BUT, I WANT it to be dirty. I want to feel like a filthy slut - I'm very happy being a filthy slut, it's who I am. I find absolutely no shame in that.

Anyway, I think we're disputing semantics here, and I think that in fact, we do agree.

Maybe I just found it a little "stifling" that some wanted to declare, indisputably, that "sex isn't dirty" in a thread that was quite obviously started up to discuss why some of us enjoy dirty sex, and what we think makes it dirty sex.

Thank FUCK we all enjoy different things though, eh?

EDITED TO ADD: I've just read through your first post in this thread again, and yup, we do fully agree, lol. Don't know why you got on the defensive with me.

 

[Recidiva]

Ok, fair enough! I fully understand where you're coming from.

My point in saying you'd missed the point merely the fact that some said, "Sex isn't dirty" (and I don't even think it was you that said that!). That was a blanket statement that obviously isn't true.

Yep, fair enough, to you, the sex you partake in and enjoy isn't dirty, but there's obviously those of us who do like sex to be down and dirty.

And what's all this about "shameless" and "shameful"? I find no shame whatsoever in the kind of sex I enjoy - even at its most filthy extremes ("play" rape/abduction - whatever).

I'm not at all ashamed of my sexuality and don't find the pure, basic act, of sex at all dirty. Sex is the most natural thing in the world, and nothing at all to be ashamed about.

BUT, I WANT it to be dirty. I want to feel like a filthy slut - I'm very happy being a filthy slut, it's who I am. I find absolutely no shame in that.

Anyway, I think we're disputing semantics here, and I think that in fact, we do agree.

Maybe I just found it a little "stifling" that some wanted to declare, indisputably, that "sex isn't dirty" in a thread that was quite obviously started up to discuss why some of us enjoy dirty sex, and what we think makes it dirty sex.

Thank FUCK we all enjoy different things though, eh?

EDITED TO ADD: I've just read through your first post in this thread again, and yup, we do fully agree, lol. Don't know why you got on the defensive with me.

Yay! Not trying to be defensive, just clarifying.

It's odd to see where people come from, and I think where things get hung up is how we've defined our terms. "Shame" to me probably doesn't mean what you might think it means, so I'd have to clarify it further. Problem with me having specific and highly defined terms that only make sense to me until I'm forced to expand on them.

Even in the category of "dirty" there are those who truly believe it's evil and dirty, and those who believe they're playing at it and that's what they want.

I can't do him justice, I'm paraphrasing, but my friend tortoise here once said something to the effect: "If you feel as much anxiety about fantasizing about something as you do actually doing it, that makes the line between fantasy and reality indistinguishable."

My fantasies are completely free of judgment. If something turns me on, it does. I'll admit it. Very little anxiety in fantasy at all.

There are things I'll utilize as pure fantasy to add the pleasure, but anxiety isn't something I enjoy, so I won't bring it into real life.

Some people, though, really enjoy the anxiety as part of the mix. To me that's totally the difference between whether or not you want bleu cheese on your salad or not. Personal preference. I hate bleu cheese, leave it off. Doesn't mean other folks can't have it. Perfectly at home for the majority. Just not me. I think I'm in the minority.

The only really bad part of the spectrum are the people that are either so uptight about it that they won't do anything, or so either anxiety free or addicted to anxiety, there's no reason to not do what they fantasize, and to enforce it on others.

 

[shereads]

Why is sex dirty?

Two words: rubber underwear.

 

[Guest]

Yay! Not trying to be defensive, just clarifying.

It's odd to see where people come from, and I think where things get hung up is how we've defined our terms. "Shame" to me probably doesn't mean what you might think it means, so I'd have to clarify it further. Problem with me having specific and highly defined terms that only make sense to me until I'm forced to expand on them.

Even in the category of "dirty" there are those who truly believe it's evil and dirty, and those who believe they're playing at it and that's what they want.

I can't do him justice, I'm paraphrasing, but my friend tortoise here once said something to the effect: "If you feel as much anxiety about fantasizing about something as you do actually doing it, that makes the line between fantasy and reality indistinguishable."

My fantasies are completely free of judgment. If something turns me on, it does. I'll admit it. Very little anxiety in fantasy at all.

There are things I'll utilize as pure fantasy to add the pleasure, but anxiety isn't something I enjoy, so I won't bring it into real life.

Some people, though, really enjoy the anxiety as part of the mix. To me that's totally the difference between whether or not you want bleu cheese on your salad or not. Personal preference. I hate bleu cheese, leave it off. Doesn't mean other folks can't have it. Perfectly at home for the majority. Just not me. I think I'm in the minority.

The only really bad part of the spectrum are the people that are either so uptight about it that they won't do anything, or so either anxiety free or addicted to anxiety, there's no reason to not do what they fantasize, and to enforce it on others.

Yep, absolutely, to all of that. Different courses for different horses, and all that.

Completely agree with what you said in the last para there, btw.

It's all about feeling comfortable with what we enjoy, and being able to recognise what we enjoy, and getting the most out of it together, in a fully consenting relationship.

And now England have scored, so I've chilled somewhat.

 

[rgraham666]

And now England have scored, so I've chilled somewhat.

You're so easy to please.

Nhed kthe gqs khrs jkpw ajnws.

 

[neonlyte]

And now England have scored, so I've chilled somewhat.

PST - Pre Scoring Tension, use it as you will

 

[NoJo]

I can't believe nobody's quoted Woody Allen yet!


The reason sex is dirty to us, is that anything that reminds us that homo sapiens is just another species of animal, is dirty.

 

[Recidiva]

I can't believe nobody's quoted Woody Allen yet!


The reason sex is dirty to us, is that anything that reminds us that homo sapiens is just another species of animal, is dirty.

I'm fine with being an animal.

Naked is good.

 

[English Lady]

I think its "dirty" and "exciting" for the same reasons that recreational drugs, fast cars, extreme sports, favorite foods, and whatnot are (to varying degrees of both categories, of course)...

...because it's primal, a loss of willpower, and very physical and tangible. None of those are analytic experiences, all touch on something instinctually physical or chemically inducing--such is a deviation from Rational Man.

Just my thoughts on it, anyway.

Yes, I agree with this I also agree with Lou, sex can be dirty and I lurve it that way

Maybe we Brit's don't have the same problem with the use of the terms "dirty" and "filthy" for some reason? Sex is good, it's wonderfully good but it can be good and very dirty too.


I don't tihnk I've added anything new, but I just wanted to throw my vote in for "I love dirty sex" too

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I don't think I have ever used the term "dirty" to describe sex. That is besides the mud-wrestling kind ofcourse.

For me there is a distinct difference between making love and fucking. Both are good - depends on the person... depends on the moment. I suppose fucking could be considered by some as "dirty"? I'm not sure... Dirty for me = something wrong (Negative vibrations - sickness even)

Now if we refer to wicked or "kinky" Pushing boundaries... improper as such. In that case you have my attention. All of it!

 

[scheherazade_79]

I don't think I have ever used the term "dirty" to describe sex. That is besides the mud-wrestling kind ofcourse.

That's because you haven't met me yet I can be really fucking filthy when I'm in the mood

 

[Nirvanadragones]

That's because you haven't met me yet I can be really fucking filthy when I'm in the mood

Define " fucking filthy". It would probably match my idea of "really kinky" - pushing boundaries as such.

 

[scheherazade_79]

Define " fucking filthy". It would probably match my idea of "really kinky" - pushing boundaries as such.

I'm not sure I can put it into words... I could show you, though

 

[Aurora Black]

I'm not sure I can put it into words... I could show you, though

Cheeky tart.

 

[Recidiva]

Define " fucking filthy". It would probably match my idea of "really kinky" - pushing boundaries as such.

Yeah, this is where the concept sorta breaks down for me. Yeah, there are some boundaries you might push...

But then there are others that aren't going to budge. A lover really needs to know what I'm curious about and want to push my boundaries, not theirs.

I might not necessarily want to go where it's kinky for you because for me it's just a complete turn off.

For instance, don't come home and tell me you really want to try incest and bring a sister. Bye.

Some things are really bye bye. And you can gallop right up to my fences, but take one inch past and I go from 60 to 0 in one second.

 

[scheherazade_79]

Cheeky tart.

Oy! Who are you calling a tart? I was being serious as a matter of fact... I'm not sure I could put it into words...

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Some things are really bye bye.

But, I have such a sexy sister

(OMG, did i just say that??! )

I guess it's bye bye then!

 

[Recidiva]

But, I have such a sexy sister

(OMG, did i just say that??! )

I guess it's bye bye the!

I'm no fun at all.

 

[Guest]

I'm not sure I can put it into words...

With all due respect to the discussion (and threadjacking) that has ensued, about whether or not we, as individuals, actually believe sex to be dirty, or whether or not we enjoy dirty sex (it's gone into a terminology debate), *THAT*, I believe was the whole point of Zoot's thread.

He was asking us (those of us who do acknowledge and enjoy dirty sex) how we define it; what does it mean to us... what makes a particular sexual act dirty for us. It's an interesting discussion, and one I was enjoying having.

But what makes a story "dirty"? There are plenty of stories on Lit of open, loving sex, and they always seem flat and pretty unintersting to me. I always look for the dirtiness, the sense of transgression. It's not just breaking social taboos--there's as many dull, undirty incest storries here as any other kind--it's something else.

I'd be interested in any ideas or opinions. What makes sex dirty and exciting?

--Zoot

Lou

 

[scheherazade_79]

With all due respect to the discussion (and threadjacking) that has ensued, about whether or not we, as individuals, actually believe sex to be dirty, or whether or not we enjoy dirty sex (it's gone into a terminology debate), *THAT*, I believe was the whole point of Zoot's thread.

He was asking us (those of us who do acknowledge and enjoy dirty sex) how we define it; what does it mean to us... what makes a particular sexual act dirty for us. It's an interesting discussion, and one I was enjoying having.



Lou

Come on, girlfriend. Put your coat on. I'm taking you out for a smoke

Hijacking over.