If someone didn't care for the weak people on their team, I wouldn't assign them to be project manager either.
It's ALWAYS about competition! Even if that competition is with yourself to be better at what you're doing!
Self-improvement is competition now, lol. That's a super broad view of competition you're working with right there, and probably not what comes to mind when the average person thinks of competition.
You're correct: AVERAGE person!
The most successful people I know wouldn't think of self improvement as a competition, either...
When I was in school a long time ago, the teachers would read out each student's grades to the class at the end of each quarter. That was intended for the students to understand where their skills compared to the other who sat in that same class.
Good for you. If you wanna frame your own self-improvement that way, sure, I ain't gonna argue with you. But other successful people frame it in other ways.
Women often like men to do stuff where they need to confront or negotiate with other men, especially if it is in a field where the 'little lady may not know much about this'. My Cousin Vinnie:
Course not. It's all about 'crafting'.
Women in middle management and lots of office managers and Administrative Assistants get lots of quiet respect because their work is essential, they are often quietly making key decisions that make their 'bosses' look good, they seem to 'know their place' but actually have a lot of clout because the machine stops without them, and they often know where 'all the bodies are buried'.
Oooh my favorite movie! I ideolized her, she knew cars cold yet had gorgeous nails *grin*
I can see how you read it that way. And I confess a bias toward tolerant people. BTW, someone who is acting isn't 'fake'. A good actor believes in their role. And I love strong women. OTOH, I see millenia-old ways women are strong without necessarily using a 'testosterone based' model. Many indigenous groups in North America are led by women. They are pretty good at not taking any shit. I am absolutely not making a case for women getting stuck with 'quiet', passive-aggressive ways of negotiating their lives. 'Hear me roar' and 'Let it go' are absolutely tools in the quiver. We just don't shame people if they don't have or use those tools.
There's a scene in a Pinter play. Katharine Hepburn was playing a married person who knew exactly what she wanted. She was upset at some workers. I believe, were messing up her home in a way that had her really wired. (Manybe it was just party guests.) She told her husband to go tell the people to leave. Good leaders delegate. Then there is also, 'not being responsible for being the one who is being mean.' One style of management that millions accept is, "Okay, all you assholes, you're making an ungodly racket and this job looks like a cow shat all over it. Get the fuck out and come back when you can do it right." Another is, "Excuse me, can you all please stop for a minute? Everyone here is getting jangled by all the noise. And I'm sorry, but we all agreed on certain pretty tight specs for this job, and, don't you agree? This here is looking like quite a mess. Please take a break; regroup, and let's get this back on track." Both work. Nobody is being given a pass. When I played football, certain players (and a lot more fans and commentators) would crow about how 'we totally humiliated those sorry sons of bitches.' I was happier if it was a close game and I knew we had won against 'honorable opponents.'
Winning is fun. But I have played on too many teams with mediocre seasons or competed in too many 'races' where I didn't win to beat myself up or my teammates, or an opponent for not winning. For me winning is the sizzle on the steak. But the reality is that most times you don't win. It doesn't make you a loser. It makes you a savvy, experience player. And is playing to win a key motive? Of course.
Would that one on the upper right get your toes curling? Looks like grandma's old rollers. "Takes pains to be beautiful" as she used to say.
Of course, MOST people don't win!
Of all the hours and hours I put in, on stifling sweaty, days or icy ones, the objective was to get my performance and those of my teammates in top form. On 'game day' sometimes that training paid off in a win, and sometimes it didn't. It was good to be on some championship teams. It was good to win some matches. But if the 'payoff' was a win I never would do it year after year. Same with writing, or acting, or art. It doesn't need to get the Tony or the blue ribbon. It just needs to give someone pleasure in seeing it and me the fun of doing it. Wins evaporate. They can make you feel like you're the best for a while. But then you get to suit up and go practice again. And they don't necessarily translate. A champion tennis player is not necessarily a good fuck. Although that Aryna Sabalenka...
Why bother sweating, freezing, or spending time to practice, if not to be BETTER?
Comparison is the thief of Joy.
You've no idea how true I've personally found that to be.
Sometimes 'civilization' isn't what we think it is,
Totally agree. But feeling great about competing is not the same as feeling great about winning. Simple metaphor, appropriate here: Ejaculation is sure the culmination of making love. Frustrating without it. But all the rest of it is fabulous too. And sometimes seeing someone else 'win' is about as good as 'winning' yourself. And no, someone doesn't have to 'win' for it to be worthwhile.
Curiously, the root tenet of Buddhism.
