Woman's Sounding Board

[Jenny _S]

In the News...

(Bagdad) The entire UN Headquarters was bombed today. Reports from the scene indicate a riot of sorts as revelers raised the roof with singing, dancing and small arms fire. Civilian and Military Police were called to the scene to stop the riot.

The building owner complained to police that the drunken UN employees destroyed on entire corner of his building, burying other drunks in the ruble. Sergio de Mello, the head negotiator for the UN contingent in Bagdad and an unnamed Iraqi women were reported killed in the melay when the roof of the basement room where they were "getting it on" collapsed.

Pentagon sources remarked "This is just another terrorist attack on the good people of Iraq." Reporters were not sure who the General was refering too.

Welcome back, Boo

 

[PepperTed]

I find it sad that such fools are allowed to rule, whether they be male or female,

bloody bi-peds....



I thought that your God / Creator asked you to be responsible stewards of all of the planet, not just those that vote for you....

maybe we shoould heave eaten you all before you got the spear.... it would have helped if you tasted better....

 

[Native Alien]

Uh oh...is the UN going to have to say oops again?

Good morning ya'll.

Boo, I hope that wasn't that nasty grape flavor that you were indulging in last evening. lol.

{{{{PepperTed}}}} and plays with his fur.

Now Ted, it just wouldn't be the same without us here...

 

[PepperTed]

Uh oh...is the UN going to have to say oops again?

Good morning ya'll.

Boo, I hope that wasn't that nasty grape flavor that you were indulging in last evening. lol.

{{{{PepperTed}}}} and plays with his fur.

Now Ted, it just wouldn't be the same without us here...

{{{{NA}}}}

Thank you sweet lady....

 

[Native Alien]

A question for you PepperTed. How is a polar bear like you surviving in the deep south?

 

[Native Alien]

Dang everyone else must be sleeping.

 

[BooMerengue]

I find it sad that such fools are allowed to rule, whether they be male or female,

bloody bi-peds....



I thought that your God / Creator asked you to be responsible stewards of all of the planet, not just those that vote for you....

maybe we shoould heave eaten you all before you got the spear.... it would have helped if you tasted better....

I'm a Changin'Cherry fanatic, Native!! LOL... yeah... UN's gonna have to say "Ooops" Cuz George doesn't know how... but I'm gonna hush cuz I don't want to rile Waverly'sGirl... I'm waaaaaaaaaay too tired for that!! LOL

Hey, Ted... we have different gods/creators? Thought it was the same dude w/ too much time on his hands...you know... like 60 zillion year long days and shit...

 

[Native Alien]

Same none gender specific person withe wayyyyyyy to much time on their hands Boo. As to that cherry, good choice.

 

[Jenny _S]

Good Morning All

(Avila Beach, Calif) A 50 year old college instructor was killed today when she attempted to wrestle a 40 foot Great White Shark from the Pacific. Deborah Franzman was pronounced both dead and stupid at the scene of the tragidy.

Sources at the scene said Ms Franzman was "cruising the beach looking for studs" when she spotted the shark basking in the sun and jumped in the water screaming.

Alezandro Hernandez, a friend and co-drop-out from the Santa Monica chapter of AA said he thought Ms. Franzman was attacking her exhusband who is a well know southern California "Land Shark".

An autopsy is scheduled on the only remaining body part, a foot, on Thursday to confirm the cause of death. A spokesman at the Los Angeles County Corornor's office refused to comment on whether Ms. Franzman may have been bitten in violation of WWF rules, saying only that "On first examination it would appear the victim may possibly have suffered some traumatic injuries during the scuffle."

 

[BooMerengue]

That feedback was mine, Native- and all that gibberish was supposed to be this...http://www.feebleminds-gifs.com/adu118.gif

Jenny- I just saw that story... I think I'll try one! LOL

 

[Jenny _S]

That feedback was mine, Native- and all that gibberish was supposed to be this...http://www.feebleminds-gifs.com/adu118.gif

Jenny- I just saw that story... I think I'll try one! LOL

Morning Boo...
It's off to work of me...

Do a story... just think of how really stupid you can make the participants.

 

[Native Alien]

I really like that monkey Boo. Jenny just think, three more days is all...

 

[Jenny _S]

I really like that monkey Boo. Jenny just think, three more days is all...

Yeah... today's hump day... I'm ready for a weekend

 

[Native Alien]

Me too Jenny, me too.

 

[Jenny _S]

It's over

Me too Jenny, me too.

Hump day is over. Am I dead yet?

 

[Native Alien]

Somehow Jenny, I think not. lol.

 

[BooMerengue]

Hi Kids!! Went browsin' last night! Look at some of what I found...
http://geocities.com/gifcollection/images/animals2/an_dog_dalmatians.gif

...aren't these a delicacy in France? Or is it China?

 

[Jenny _S]

Hi Kids!! Went browsin' last night! Look at some of what I found...
http://geocities.com/gifcollection/images/animals2/an_dog_dalmatians.gif

...aren't these a delicacy in France? Or is it China?

This Weeks "Oops" Award goes to...

Doctor Luiz Carlos Lenoir, the Brazilian surgeon. It seems Dr. Lenoir failed to cure the earache of one Mr. Vlademar Lopez de Moraes when he performed an emergency vasectomy.

Anotomical and Forensic experts were quick to point out that this threatment, although somewhat irregular, is often performed for earaches even though there is no known connection between your ears and genitals, the "placebo effect" seems to do wonders.

Mr. Lopez de Moraes, however, seems to be taking this entire incident in a somewhat negative light. He is bringing suit against the Doctor and the Hospital for 200,000,000 Brazilain pestades or about $3.80 USD.

 

[Jenny _S]

The Hollywood Hotline....

(Hollywood) Sources tell me that there was a drunken "swapping" party at the home of Jared Leto last night in the Hollywood Hills. In attendance were Jared's long time X-girl friend, Camron Diaz, and Teen Lovers, Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake.

It is my understanding that Britney has had the "Hots" for Camron Diaz for sometime while Justin and Jared have been "doing the nasty" off and on for months.

It would appear that this gives new meaning to the term "Swapping" as well as hopefully ends the careers of all in attendance.

 

[BooMerengue]

"CLANG!!!!" *kicking my last post... goddammmmmmmmmm GeoCities!!!

Jenny! Native! I'm here- I promise!! lol
http://geocities.com/b26_anime/images/amg/amg_icesku.gif

...so the stupid blonde bitch does it again... *slappin' head w/ a 2x4!

 

[Native Alien]

Blonde maybe, but stupid never Boo...

 

[BooMerengue]

Blonde maybe, but stupid never Boo...

Awww Native!! Check's in the mail, babe!! LOL

Native- I found this for you! Now... before you read it? Take a really big drink!

A religious organisation in the USA has caused controversy by announcing plans to train and supply a "new breed" of guide dog - for non believers.

"St Bernard's Guide Dogs for the Unsaved", a registered charity based in Utah, say that they hope to use the specially trained animals to "guide these poor lost sheep back to the fold - like on a farm or something".

We talked to the Slightly Reverend Kitty-Jo Brezhnev, one of the founders of St Bernard's, about the scheme.

"For many years now, those whom the Lord has chosen to blind in the eyes have had the opportunity to be assigned a canine guide, to help them find their way around in daily life", she explained.

"In a similar way, those poor souls blind to God's word will now be given a chance to overcome their poorly developed moral sense and be shown the right path by a godly four legged companion of their own".



Let us spay,
In Dog we trust,
The Lord is my German shepherd, etc etc
It is intended that the dogs will be responsible for guiding their allotted heathen in every aspect of their spiritual life.

As well as accompanying their charge to Sunday worship and leading them away from temptation, the pious pooches will be trained to bark all night if they forget to say their prayers, alert the police if they take the Lord's name in vain and piss all over the sofa if they covet their neighbour's ass.

Though many secular and humanist groups have denounced the scheme as "a load of old shitsu" the organisation insist that it is not their intention to cause offence to "filthy hell-bound sinners".

"Our sole concern in this endeavour is the spiritual well-being of all concerned" insisted Rev Brezhnev.

She went on to describe how a set of strict guidelines would be adhered to when assigning a dog to an infidel.

"Before a guide dog is placed with a non-believer they will first be de-wormed, neutered, micro-chipped and house trained, before being put though a rigourous programme of obedience training" she explained.

"As for the dogs, they'll be given a silly white collar and pretty much left to get on with it".

 

[Jenny _S]

God! Almost 5 PM.... Today is dragging

Thursdays SUCK!

 

[alwaysawake]

God! Almost 5 PM.... Today is dragging

Thursdays SUCK!

It sucks WORSE being in the fucked up traffic...courtesy of the George Bush visit to Portland...what a waste of police resources!

 

[BooMerengue]

Arrggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh I am sooooooo blonder and blonder... that quoted area was for you Jenny!

AA!! I used to live on the same road in the same town as Al Gore when he was vice-prez...talk about a mess!! How are you baby?? Long time...!