😎 You Might Be A Litster If -

[TheSilverLining]

YMBALI someone sends you a text and your first thought is “five words to say before sex”.

 

[DarkSimian]

YMBALI you start writing erotic fiction based on characters from your favorite book, movie, or TV show

 

[Mrtenant]

YMBAL if you come to Lit and try to exert a behind-the-computer-screen superiority complex from your mother's basement while using only one hand for the keyboard

 

[ydahecnot]

YMBALI you think of three-word-fragment candidates from your real-life convos

 

[alwaysaway]

YMBALI you can turn any sentence into the dirty version.

 

[LostGirlTink]

YMBALI if you have to double check whether you used a persons screen name or actual name to be sure it was appropriate

 

[VoraciousValue]

If you wonder how many of your coworkers are fellow horny perverts posting on this site.

 

[Hornblende]

If your brain keeps constructing haiku and limericks.

...or perhaps that's just me...

 

[beachbaby179]

YMBALI you double and triple check the attachments on your email to mom to make sure you haven't attached the wrong photo.

 

[numeniusa]

YMBALI you double and triple check the attachments on your email to mom to make sure you haven't attached the wrong photo.

Ha! I'm paranoid about getting that wrong...

Would it be worse to get it wrong with your Mum or with a work colleague, I wonder?

 

[TheSilverLining]

YMBALI you show your colleague a pic on your phone and have a mini heart attack as they start scrolling

 

[numeniusa]

YMBALI you show your colleague a pic on your phone and have a mini heart attack as they start scrolling

I believe the etiquette now is that if someone shows you a pic on their device you don't, under any circumstances, scroll...

And I was also told that for safety you should zoom in to enlarge the pic before you hand it over, then if they do 'swipe', it'll just move around in the zoomed pic rather than scrolling. That gives you a few precious seconds to grab the device back before your tastier offerings are revealed...

 

[LizVegas79]

I believe the etiquette now is that if someone shows you a pic on their device you don't, under any circumstances, scroll...

And I was also told that for safety you should zoom in to enlarge the pic before you hand it over, then if they do 'swipe', it'll just move around in the zoomed pic rather than scrolling. That gives you a few precious seconds to grab the device back before your tastier offerings are revealed...

YMBALI you take Numi's very clever and very excellent advice to heart!

 

[VoraciousValue]

YMBALI if you fantasize about using a sex toy while you write a story.

 

[TheSilverLining]

I believe the etiquette now is that if someone shows you a pic on their device you don't, under any circumstances, scroll...

And I was also told that for safety you should zoom in to enlarge the pic before you hand it over, then if they do 'swipe', it'll just move around in the zoomed pic rather than scrolling. That gives you a few precious seconds to grab the device back before your tastier offerings are revealed...

Haha noted!

 

[TheSilverLining]

YMBALI your post about finally having a legal (thrones related) use for your night vision perving glasses is met with stony silence from your non porn-board colleagues.

 

[bunny4med]

YMBALI you can type better one handed than two.

 

[LizVegas79]

YMBALI you've ever been asked "Where did you hear that?" and you had to quick invent a name for a Litster who you only know by their avatar or username.

(soooo guilty of this one! lol)

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

YMBALI you get a little frustrated when a Litster's av or username gives no idea of their gender...or portrays the wrong gender.

 

[neakman]

YMBALI you get a little frustrated when a Litster's av or username gives no idea of their gender...or portrays the wrong gender.

I do have this problem.

 

[JennyNo1]

I do have this problem.

You mean you're a woman???

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

YMBALI you've caught the horny shrapnel from your dirty talk for someone else.

 

[Sexybritches69]

YMBALI you double check to see if anything is written in white font.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

YMBALI... You follow through on a previous post and name a character in your Geek Pride story Captain Y'Mbali of the Federation Freighter Genoa Maru.

Coming soon to a Literotica Reading List near you.

Fifteen points to anyone who can name the Humphrey Bogart movie I stole the ship's name from...

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

YMBALI you just saw that thread and now you can't find it anywhere.