are you a slave, submissive or sensualist

[Richard49]

read back R49, she did give a definition,

but it seems not to meet your needs, which I get from your post,

Than we are talking about senuality not D/s?

how did you get to this from Mysts posts and definitions?

just curious what you are actually trying to get out of this thread, are you having trouble processing your past three years experiences? if so, why? do you know who you are? do you know what you crave? do you know how to find satisfaction?

like i said, just curious.

I did read back
I see NO defintion

Why did i say "Than we are talking about senuality not D/s?"
because of the # of time times and way she used the word play

Now I say to you
go read back
and you will find why I started this thread

but in addition to what I have already posted
I see a BIG difference between BDSM and D/s
I am seeing BDSM as a sensuality thing
and D/s just that Dominate/submissive

and to many sensualist are presenting themselves as D/s

now as I have already posted
when I see something that contradicts my reality over and over
I reexamine my reality and that is what this thread is about
and from some of the feed back ... others are also benifiting

 

[shyly curious]

I did read back
I see NO defintion

Why did i say "Than we are talking about senuality not D/s?"
because of the # of time times and way she used the word play

Now I say to you
go read back
and you will find why I started this thread

but in addition to what I have already posted
I see a BIG difference between BDSM and D/s
I am seeing BDSM as a sensuality thing
and D/s just that Dominate/submissive

and to many sensualist are presenting themselves as D/s

now as I have already posted
when I see something that contradicts my reality over and over
I reexamine my reality and that is what this thread is about
and from some of the feed back ... others are also benifiting

ok, you see no definition, i did.

to clear the misconception, i have read this thread start to finish several times.

are you saying there is no sensuality in D/s? that only BDSM has sensuality? isn't D/s part od BDSM?

Maybe you could expand on the part of your reality that is in contradiction, so that all of us could benefit?

Why do you see sensuality as having no place in D/s?

be well,

 

[ethereal~minx]

You bring up some interesting/good points .......... and context


Is it bad to respond to external stimulus?
Is this a sensualist?

What role does trust play in both submission and slavery?

Is one a submissive or does one submit?

I am sure there are even more points here that I have missed

sensuality was primary over submission~ I would act out of desire to feel good/to get a positive reaction, rather than out of reverence for the dominant or myself. I didn't realize I placed all my worth outside of me like this. it sure felt good though when the look was right, the words~~ ohhh I never felt sooo high
wow. I've lived to get response.

at times I would appear submissive, other times I certainly would not. what good questions you have here.

wow. I think one actively submits. [writing deleting writing deleting...you've made me think alot here]

 

[Richard49]

are you saying there is no sensuality in D/s? that only BDSM has sensuality? isn't D/s part od BDSM?

Maybe you could expand on the part of your reality that is in contradiction, so that all of us could benefit?

Why do you see sensuality as having no place in D/s?

be well,

boy have I not written clearly I guess

Is it not amazing
we all speak english or american english
yet we are so far away on understanding

It has been my expernce that there are many who present themselves as submissives who in reality are ONLY senualists.
They get no pleasure out of the serving or they only serve as part of the "bedroom play" and where there pleausre lies is in the sensation of the pain. They "love" to scene not serve.

BDSM can be only the pain/punishment end. The DS in BDSM does not stand for D/s. We have twisted it out there. The SM stand for Sadio Maschitism.

now your last line totally misses anything I thought i had posted here. Sensuality can have plenty to do with D/s. However D/s is primarly a mental/psychological/emotional thing. Some would say it is spiritiual.

D/s is about finding pleasure and place in submission. In the service. It is about having the ability and mental bent to accept that submission.

One can be into BDSM without being into D/s. I think it would be very difficult to be into D/s and no be into BDSM

I am sure I have made my position as clear as well stired mud.

But it is others realities I am looking for
and I find it interesting that I ask a question and I am sudenly painted into a reality......

shaking my head

I always thought questions were for clearfication

 

[shyly curious]

boy have I not written clearly I guess

Is it not amazing
we all speak english or american english
yet we are so far away on understanding

It has been my expernce that there are many who present themselves as submissives who in reality are ONLY senualists.
They get no pleasure out of the serving or they only serve as part of the "bedroom play" and where there pleausre lies is in the sensation of the pain. They "love" to scene not serve.

BDSM can be only the pain/punishment end. The DS in BDSM does not stand for D/s. We have twisted it out there. The SM stand for Sadio Maschitism.

now your last line totally misses anything I thought i had posted here. Sensuality can have plenty to do with D/s. However D/s is primarly a mental/psychological/emotional thing. Some would say it is spiritiual.

D/s is about finding pleasure and place in submission. In the service. It is about having the ability and mental bent to accept that submission.

One can be into BDSM without being into D/s. I think it would be very difficult to be into D/s and no be into BDSM

I am sure I have made my position as clear as well stired mood.

But it is others realities I am looking for
and I find it interesting that I ask a question and I am sudenly painted into a reality......

shaking my head

I always thought questions were for clearfication

This is interesting, trying to understand what you mean from what you write, I sometimes find myself confused by the mispellings and grammer you use. Maybe that is what is throwing me off here.

What is meant by, "I am sure I have made my position as clear as well stired mood."???

Mybe I am also confused by what BDSM stands for. I thought BD was Bondage/Discipline, DS was Domination/Submission, SM was Sadism/Masocism. Maybe I am off base.

And maybe the definition of sensualist could be clarified. Is not anything that pleases or triggers a sense reaction a sensual thing? Can submission not be sensual for both the Domme and the sub? Sight, sound, taste, touch, smell are all part of submission. Or am I off base again?

I like that this conversation is continuing, I am learning more each post. Thank you for your patience.

 

[Kajira Callista]

BDSM= bondage discipline sadism masochism
D/s= Domination submission

 

[shyly curious]

BDSM= bondage discipline sadism masochism
D/s= Domination submission

So, is D/s part of BDSM or is it separate?

<note to self, go find thread / website with BDSM trilogy explained and repost it here>

 

[Richard49]

This is interesting, trying to understand what you mean from what you write, I sometimes find myself confused by the mispellings and grammer you use. Maybe that is what is throwing me off here.

What is meant by, "I am sure I have made my position as clear as well stired mood."???

1) if you can not deal with my typos and misspellings
don't read my posts

2) seems to me you are justtrying ot pick a fight
and have little else in mind

3) mood should have read mud

BTW you have misspellings/typos in your posts also

 

[Richard49]

BDSM= bondage discipline sadism masochism
D/s= Domination submission

Thank you kc
but it seems he/she still does not get it

 

[Richard49]

So, is D/s part of BDSM or is it separate?

<note to self, go find thread / website with BDSM trilogy explained and repost it here>

as kc posted
it is seperate
BDSM covers ONLY the senulatist part

that is why a top can be a bottom
as some post

that is why one can be a switch

It is like a square and retangle
a square is a retangle
but a retangle is not a square

now how the hell did we get here
when what was requested by the thread is for people to post there relality in sharing "their" definition of SS &S....

 

[shyly curious]

1) if you can not deal with my typos and misspellings
don't read my posts

2) seems to me you are justtrying ot pick a fight
and have little else in mind

3) mood should have read mud

BTW you have misspellings/typos in your posts also

1A) I thought I made it clear I was trying to understand what you were saying. If you prefer I not particpate in your thread, just say so.

2A) Repeat, as previously posted, I am trying to understand

3A) OK

I went looking on some BDSM info pages, and what I seem to find is that the DS in the middle of BDSM can and is used to refer to D/s in the way you use it.

B&D
Bondage and Discipline, or B&D, is yet another acronym
used for sexual activities involving erotic restraint and
slave/Master or slave/Mistress fantasy games.

D&S
Dominance and Submission, or D&S, is a more appropriate
term to describe playing with power and trust in an erotic
way. D&S play can include, but is not limited to, S&M
play. D&S play between consenting partners can also be
entirely nonphysical and confined to the realm of fantasy.

S&M
The common term for sexual or erotic activity involving
the giving and recieving of pain and pleasure. The
letters of the expression refer to sadism and masochism.
Although, strictly speaking, the term refers only to
physical play, it is sometimes generally used to encompass
dominance and submission play (D&S) as well. Some people
spell this term SM to indicate that sadomasochism is one
word and one lifestyle, not two.



BTW - I'm sure I do have typos and mispellings, and I accept that some people may get confused by what I meant when they read them. It is my responsibility to clearly express myself, and to seek clarification when I do not understand another person's words.


as previously posted, thank you for your patience.

 

[Kajira Callista]

1A) I thought I made it clear I was trying to understand what you were saying. If you prefer I not particpate in your thread, just say so.

2A) Repeat, as previously posted, I am trying to understand

3A) OK

I went looking on some BDSM info pages, and what I seem to find is that the DS in the middle of BDSM can and is used to refer to D/s in the way you use it.

B&D
Bondage and Discipline, or B&D, is yet another acronym
used for sexual activities involving erotic restraint and
slave/Master or slave/Mistress fantasy games.

D&S
Dominance and Submission, or D&S, is a more appropriate
term to describe playing with power and trust in an erotic
way. D&S play can include, but is not limited to, S&M
play. D&S play between consenting partners can also be
entirely nonphysical and confined to the realm of fantasy.

S&M
The common term for sexual or erotic activity involving
the giving and recieving of pain and pleasure. The
letters of the expression refer to sadism and masochism.
Although, strictly speaking, the term refers only to
physical play, it is sometimes generally used to encompass
dominance and submission play (D&S) as well. Some people
spell this term SM to indicate that sadomasochism is one
word and one lifestyle, not two.



BTW - I'm sure I do have typos and mispellings, and I accept that some people may get confused by what I meant when they read them. It is my responsibility to clearly express myself, and to seek clarification when I do not understand another person's words.


as previously posted, thank you for your patience.

i would like to see the sites you have been to. according to what they are saying it should be BDDSSM. i've never seen that before.

 

[Kajira Callista]

ok n/m i found one...this is what shly is meaning i think richard. http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/Ds/bdsm.htm

 

[Kajira Callista]

here is more to read shyly
http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/info_pack_iii.htm

might help you understand what richard was saying

 

[Richard49]

It does not mater what you found on other pages
Sorry
I think part of what lead me to post this thread
is that the terms/roles/titles have gotten lost some where
the idea that the DS in BDSM stood for dominate and submissive is realitively new .............................

Orginally those that particpated in BDSM were either tops or bottoms ........... I am not sure what switches were called if anything ..................

a top inflicked bondage, discipline, and pain
the bottom was the reciever ............

the D/s aspect was orginally applied to owners and slaves
yup slaves .....................

Anyway
though each of us have our own kink and definations
when one says I am a ".........." there "should be something common to the defintions that we know what the other is about

As I talk to those who "claim" to be "submissive"
I should be able to know that they are into more then the sensation ............. I also should know/have enough responsiblity to find where they are at in punishment and reward

no point in beating the ass of a pain sensulaist
as a form of punishment

Anyway
the purpose of this thread has been totaly distroyed
because we are not dialiguing who's reality is right
rather than sharing and claifiying each individual's reality

 

[Richard49]

ok n/m i found one...this is what shly is meaning i think richard. http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/Ds/bdsm.htm

thanks kc

and the opeing paragraph there reads:
BDSM is an abbreviation (or an "umbrella" term) for Bondage, Discipline/Domination, Sadism/Submission, and Masochism (or Sadomasochism). It is a catch-all term for "D/s" (Dominance and submission) as well as for "SM" (sadism/masochism).

This is NOT the meaning that was in effect up into the 80s

ok
so I am older then God
when he said let there be light i through the switch on the generator .....................(should hear my remarks when he said he was making women

anyway
when you read this paragraph
and try to use it in real life
to understand where someone is coming from it fails
flat ass fails

 

[Richard49]

http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/info_pack_iii.htm

opening paragarph

This writing is not meant to be a guide or a handbook, but more of an understanding of a lifestyle. One of love between two consenting adults. Although sex does occur in these life styles this writing is more of an explanation of the lifestyles and not a sexual guide.


so now BDSM is NOT sex?
confused look and thougths become more so

 

[Kajira Callista]

thanks kc

and the opeing paragraph there reads:
BDSM is an abbreviation (or an "umbrella" term) for Bondage, Discipline/Domination, Sadism/Submission, and Masochism (or Sadomasochism). It is a catch-all term for "D/s" (Dominance and submission) as well as for "SM" (sadism/masochism).

This is NOT the meaning that was in effect up into the 80s

ok
so I am older then God
when he said let there be light i through the switch on the generator .....................(should hear my remarks when he said he was making women

anyway
when you read this paragraph
and try to use it in real life
to understand where someone is coming from it fails
flat ass fails

it is a new term for me also richard, and i dont think im as old as you . Im still trying to figure out how sadism and submission are stuck together in that essay.

 

[Richard49]

here is more to read shyly
http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/info_pack_iii.htm

might help you understand what richard was saying

second paragraph:
D/s and B&D are terms most often used in society today. They are distinctly different in that D/s stands for Domination and submissiveness while B&D stands for Bondage and Discipline. These are two distinctly different life styles. The terms are not interchangeable, yet one lifestyle may lead into the other, depending upon the limits agreed upon by both consenting parties. As the relationship continues the limits may be expanded by both parties and therefore lead from one lifestyle in to the next.



Amen
amen
amen

praise you kc

can I have a hardy Amen?

(kc...get the collection plates ready to pass)

 

[Kajira Callista]

 

[Richard49]

it is a new term for me also richard, and i dont think im as old as you . Im still trying to figure out how sadism and submission are stuck together in that essay.

I too am trying to understand
and is why I orgianly posted this thread

 

[shyly curious]

here is more to read shyly
http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/info_pack_iii.htm

might help you understand what richard was saying

Thank you KC for your efforts to help me understand you and Richard.

I snipped this from the page you found.


" ... A good Dom/Domme gives a gift of love to the submissive one, one that he/she can share with their chosen one. They teach the submissive one that if control is relinquished they can attain a state of euphoria. It is a gift that the submissive one will cherish for life.

Whether the D/s or the B&D scene is chosen by the submissive one, their safety and protection is always the mainstay of game. Remember that this is a game of love."



and when I read this and reflected on my experiences as a sub I am struck by the warmth and sensual feelings I have been allowed to receive.

Richard, I certainly did not mean to destroy your thread. And I'm sorry you feel that has happened. I agree that having mutually agreed definitions of the words used in communication is necessary for ideas to be understood and shared.

I think you have made it clear you would rather I did not participate in this discussion any longer, and I will respect that preference.

be well, shy

 

[bluntforcemama]

and my opening post to this thread asked each to share thier defintion and how it applied to them

perhaps you choice to not read that far back

What, are you taking applications for an exclusive club? Is English your first language?

sensualism: Excessive devotion to sensual pleasure.

submissive: One who yields or surrenders (oneself) to the will or authority of another.

slave: One bound in servitude as the property of a person or household or one who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence.

In my play with my lover, I fit every description. I can play them seperately or all as one.

 

[Richard49]

I think you have made it clear you would rather I did not participate in this discussion any longer, and I will respect that preference.

be well, shy

if you got this than you have made NO attempt to know me
I am tired of being resposible for you feelings and thoughts
If I had wanted you out of here
I would have be very clear

I think you have taken this tread
and for whatever reason
and have used it for your own agends
so be it ................................

(except I can not figure out your agenda)

don't let the door in you in the ass on the way out

shaking my head

this is another exapmle of what I have tired to say on the resonsiblity thread

 

[Richard49]

What, are you taking applications for an exclusive club? Is English your first language?

sensualism: Excessive devotion to sensual pleasure.

submissive: One who yields or surrenders (oneself) to the will or authority of another.

slave: One bound in servitude as the property of a person or household or one who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence.

In my play with my lover, I fit every description. I can play them seperately or all as one.

your rage is adding nothing here
exclusive club?
ya in a way

I am looking to:
1) understand the changes in the language and culture of the "lifestyle" that seems to have happened without me being awear

2) to find that language so that if I am talking to someone and they say they are a submisssive I have some concept of who they are saying they are without a 100 questions

Yes english is my primary language
If you had taken the time to know me you would find out
from here on these boards and verfiable on othe internet places
that I was once famous, media whore, a talk show host, a DJ. a published author etc

Again what I do not see in your defintions
is that the subsmiive or slave recieves internal pleasure from just serving ...........................

also you again use the word play
unless you have a different picture of the word
it lends to a picture in my mind of sensual BDSM not D/s

kc has been kind enough ot post a couple urls that seem ot help clarify my attempt to understand