Can you fall in love with someone online?

[Inspirinious]

I have to admit, for me there's a lot more opportunities to fall in love online than there is in my physical world. I DO know, online is NOT enough for me, though... be it love or whatever it is.

Absolutely online love is not enough. And not sufficient for a long term commitment such as marriage.

But I still think there could be enough deep emotional connection to be considered love. Not as much as a real, physical, permanent attraction, but still love.

 

[crashD]

I have to admit, for me there's a lot more opportunities to fall in love online than there is in my physical world. I DO know, online is NOT enough for me, though... be it love or whatever it is.

does falling in lust count???

 

[HonorableRogue]

It is absolutely possible to fall in love with someone online. And then to meet them and have the moon and stars align so that you have an incredible desire to be married and have babies and...

... then it all falls apart. You are left alone and destitute and have to move in with your great-grandparents who think that you're a tramp for getting divorced, and it all must be your fault because why aren't you pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen?

Or...

...it doesn't fall apart. You're sharing your life and rich in all things and get your great-grandparents separate rooms in an assisted care facility (because they thought you were a tramp for getting divorced) and before you know it you're pregnant and ecstatic in the kitchen.

Or...

...a meteor strikes the Earth. The end.

 

[PublicAffection]

Or...

...it doesn't fall apart. You're sharing your life and rich in all things and get your great-grandparents separate rooms in an assisted care facility (because they thought you were a tramp for getting divorced) and before you know it you're pregnant and ecstatic in the kitchen.

Or...

...a meteor strikes the Earth. The end.

When it doesn't fall apart, it's because you started dating a neighbor. (Which is another colossally bad idea.) Ten years later the neighbor boy is laying under your truck, covered in grease.

Oh wait - that's all just me.

 

[TomKeen]

I think you can develop genuine feelings and affection for a person you have met via the internet. Until you meet face to face however it is nearly impossible to know if two people are actually compatible outside of that parameter and safety zone. Online is safer than real life in many regards but I suppose it would boil down to taking a risk. That of course is just one man's opinion.

 

[HonorableRogue]

When it doesn't fall apart, it's because you started dating a neighbor. (Which is another colossally bad idea.) Ten years later the neighbor boy is laying under your truck, covered in grease.

He was under your truck covered in grease and not blood, so it couldn't have been THAT bad an idea.

 

[Mirageme65]

I may have missed my chance to give my two cents... But I'm bored so here it is anyway.

Yes, yes! I believe a person can absolutely fall in love with an online friend.

Love doesn't always mean there has to be physical contact. It does mean that an emotional connection gets made.

In real life, no matter how honest we are with our spouses, there still may be things that you would say to an online friend that you may never divulge to your RT mate.

That is not to say that you "fall out of love" with your physical mate ( husband, wife, BF, GF ) but it fills a void that sometimes makes the RT relationship richer.

Online relationships require a lot of time, commitment, and understanding... Speaking as a woman brimming over with emotion, desire, passion, and a need to please and to be needed, I can say from experience that the bond can be quite profound and more than little bit fulfilling emotionally and sexually

 

[JT_Campbell]

Yes but until two people meet irl and offline there is no way to know how compatible they might actually be. It is easier online but for a relationship to move forward actual real life interactions are needed. Only my opinion of course.

 

[ReadingExcitesMe]

I do believe so~

 

[tnman03]

Infatuation does not always equate with love is my feel on this matter. I don't see the investment in time or commitment and recognize that unhappiness of ones current state can create a subjective fantasy which becomes consuming.

 

[AmazingLost]

I think online is a fantasy and when you try and bring it into real life is when the fantasy can fall apart. Some things are not meant to see the light of day.

 

[BloodMoonRising]

I think online is a fantasy and when you try and bring it into real life is when the fantasy can fall apart. Some things are not meant to see the light of day.

Ding ding ding!

 

[AllenWmsUSA]

If it reaches video chat stage, yes. That is real to the point of being everything except occupying the same physical space. If it is just text writing, no. That isn't real enough.

 

[Ginger41]

nope.

 

[freakykink]

Yes, Iceprincess and I are deeply in love

 

[Iceprincess12]

Yes, Iceprincess and I are deeply in love

Omg!! Fk are you going to start rumors grrrrr? Be nice please.

 

[troubledone]

Omg!! Fk are you going to start rumors grrrrr? Be nice please.

Princess is right

 

[Iceprincess12]

Princess is right

He isn't well behaved yet, the follies of youth.

Thank you!

 

[troubledone]

He isn't well behaved yet, the follies of youth.

Thank you!

Follies !!!!!
Juice of life is more like it

 

[SweetSam42]

Hey, no thread hijacking. Hit the playground for that.

If it reaches video chat stage, yes. That is real to the point of being everything except occupying the same physical space. If it is just text writing, no. That isn't real enough.

Hm. I'm thinking about your video chat statement... I still don't know....

 

[coffeelover5]

I do think that it's possible to establish a real connection but love is more about caring and being with that person. I do think the groundwork of a relationship could begin online. After that the in person, nonverbal communication along with really llistening takes over.

 

[Kelleebabes]

I think online is a fantasy and when you try and bring it into real life is when the fantasy can fall apart. Some things are not meant to see the light of day.

Very well put...

 

[AmazingLost]

This is a fascinating thread. I read through all the posts and this one resonated so much. I've had this same type of relationship, I've played the unknowing part of the "played" before. And it changed how I look at online and at people and at life. Burn me once...

Thank you for your honesty, I hope things are going better for you and you're a more authentic person now.

I don’t believe it’s possible to fall in love online. Lust? Sure. A crush? Infatuation? Yes. Love? No. Part of falling in love is chemistry. It’s a feeling you get when you occupy the same space. Online, the intimacy isn’t there. Without intimacy, there can be no love. I believe these types of websites, and the world of porn in general, are fantasy lands. You can be whoever/whatever you want to be. I’m a prime example. For years, I came on here and told outrageous lies. I lied about myself and told lies to lots of other people.

I’ve come to these realizations through a lot of soul searching and self-exploration. I’ve done a lot of things here that I’m not proud of. Here’s my story:
In March of 2013, I started PMing seriously with someone here. Even then, I wasn’t sure why I would do this. I was very happy in my marriage. This “cyber affair” would carry on for a year.

We texted pretty much daily and, after a while, started talking on the phone once or twice a week, then skyping a couple of times a month. I told her that she was gorgeous, wonderful, stroked her ego. Worst of all, within a week of us sending our first text messages back and forth, I told her that I loved her. I used that precious term on someone that I didn’t really know (We didn’t even know each other’s last names!) and continued to use it even though she was someone I didn’t particularly care about. Maybe a crush. Definitely lust, infatuation. Not love. I stole her emotions. What a thief and a liar I am.

I’ve asked myself what was it about her. I think it was because she paid a little bit of attention to everyone. She seemed to always be available. She really could have been anyone. I wanted the attention. I wanted the ego boost of a young woman. I wanted instant gratification.

I’ll be the first to admit that I treated her badly. Things like phone calls were chores. I had to do them to get the attention, the mediocre personalized porn that I wanted. I reached a point where I would ignore her for days at a time. A couple of apologies, a phone call, maybe a Skype session and all was forgiven. She wasn’t a real person to me, she was part of a fantasy world.

How is cybersex an intimate act? It’s masturbation. Plain and simple. It’s masturbation with someone you “know” watching. No matter how you spin it, it’s ultimately a solo act. There were Skype sessions when I had porn on the big screen behind my laptop, watching that instead of my partner. How can that be intimate?

I misused the word love. I misplaced terms of endearment. I used peoples’ emotions against them. I did very bad things to people. I’ve lied, I’ve cheated, I’ve stolen, I’ve broken promises, and I’ve violated trust. This whole thing has cost me my marriage and my relationship with the most important, most wonderful, most beautiful person I’ve ever known – my wife.

Folks, watch out. You never know who is on the other end of the keyboard. If you met me, you’d think I was a nice guy. If you “talked” with me, you’d probably like me. That person you’re head over heels “in love” with could be someone like me. Go find someone real, someone physical that you can touch! There’s someone out there for everyone, but good luck finding them on a porn site.

 

[ShelbyBubbles]

My boyfriend and I knew each other online for 4 years before we ever met in person. Our friendship grew as we got to know one another over the years and helped one another cope with different relationships and life's issues. That friendship grew past infatuation and lust after some time to a genuine sense of love and adoration. I have since moved out of my home state to be with him and at the end of this month we will celebrate 3 years of being a couple...physically living together and by the end of this year we will be married. I couldn't have asked for a better partner in life and I'm thankful I met him 7 years ago. It's always possible to fall in love with someone...no matter where it happens, the fact of the matter is that of course it can happen. Why does it seem so impossible?

 

[gregy70]

My boyfriend and I knew each other online for 4 years before we ever met in person. Our friendship grew as we got to know one another over the years and helped one another cope with different relationships and life's issues. That friendship grew past infatuation and lust after some time to a genuine sense of love and adoration. I have since moved out of my home state to be with him and at the end of this month we will celebrate 3 years of being a couple...physically living together and by the end of this year we will be married. I couldn't have asked for a better partner in life and I'm thankful I met him 7 years ago. It's always possible to fall in love with someone...no matter where it happens, the fact of the matter is that of course it can happen. Why does it seem so impossible?

I think this is beautiful!