I/i'm ok, Y/you're ok

[Aeroil]

ah yes, and then there's even intolerence within our own community, now isn't there? People who think switches are just confused, people who think Dommes aren't real Dominants, or my *favorite*, the macho Dom's who hate male subs.

Great essay Tealsphynx .

 

[snowy ciara]

but most of the femsubs think you guys rock, dear.

 

[Private_Label]

And the fem switches too. And I'm not confused about it!

 

[Rrrosyn]

ah yes, and then there's even intolerence within our own community, now isn't there? People who think switches are just confused, people who think Dommes aren't real Dominants, or my *favorite*, the macho Dom's who hate male subs.

Great essay Tealsphynx .

You left out those same macho male Doms think they can just dominate any woman, even Dommes who don't switch.

Had a Dom do that at one of the munches I attended. He kissed each woman there on the lips as a goodbye. Very sneaky about it. Tapping a lady on the shoulder so she'd turn her head into a kiss. And making sure the gentleman she brought watched it. The kiss was hard, aggressive and designed to say, Look what I can do, look what I can possess." *blech* I felt so violated but, to maintain peace, I had to hold my sub back from trying to crack the guy's skull. Luckily the guy hasn't attended another munch since. I was practicing my dodging skills.

 

[snowy ciara]

I admire your restraint. I would have kicked his ass. But I've been told I over-react sometimes.

 

[Rrrosyn]

I admire your restraint. I would have kicked his ass. But I've been told I over-react sometimes.

If he hadn't been kissing me I'd've screamed. That's my usual reaction to being startled. I don't do things to make my sub jealous. It's not my style. He's going to be my husband for at least the next 50 years. Yet he asks me why I didn't smack the guy (also my style) and why I held him back. All I can think of is that in a bar, I didn't want to be the one throwing the first punch. And I didn't want him to be either.

 

[sphynx's dragon]

If he hadn't been kissing me I'd've screamed. That's my usual reaction to being startled. I don't do things to make my sub jealous. It's not my style. He's going to be my husband for at least the next 50 years. Yet he asks me why I didn't smack the guy (also my style) and why I held him back. All I can think of is that in a bar, I didn't want to be the one throwing the first punch. And I didn't want him to be either.

If something like that were to happen, first She would probably rip his face off, second I would rip his head off. She'd have to have way faster reflexes than normal to catch my hands before impact. Not that there's much of a chance of it happening really, I tend to be watching everything around me and sharing observations with Her.

 

[SweetDommes]

You left out those same macho male Doms think they can just dominate any woman, even Dommes who don't switch.

Had a Dom do that at one of the munches I attended. He kissed each woman there on the lips as a goodbye. Very sneaky about it. Tapping a lady on the shoulder so she'd turn her head into a kiss. And making sure the gentleman she brought watched it. The kiss was hard, aggressive and designed to say, Look what I can do, look what I can possess." *blech* I felt so violated but, to maintain peace, I had to hold my sub back from trying to crack the guy's skull. Luckily the guy hasn't attended another munch since. I was practicing my dodging skills.

This kind of thing really pisses me off. If I had been at that munch, I'm afraid that I would have had to have asked him to leave after he did it the first time. That is absolutely totally and completely unacceptable behavior for ANYONE.

I've been following the thread with interest, just didn't feel like posting until now. For the record, TealSphinx, you are far from alone in your frustrations, and unfortunately, there will always be people who suck in bad ways. Just go home, hug your boy, and let him help you forget about the assholes out there.

 

[catalina_francisco]

You left out those same macho male Doms think they can just dominate any woman, even Dommes who don't switch.

Had a Dom do that at one of the munches I attended. He kissed each woman there on the lips as a goodbye. Very sneaky about it. Tapping a lady on the shoulder so she'd turn her head into a kiss. And making sure the gentleman she brought watched it. The kiss was hard, aggressive and designed to say, Look what I can do, look what I can possess." *blech* I felt so violated but, to maintain peace, I had to hold my sub back from trying to crack the guy's skull. Luckily the guy hasn't attended another munch since. I was practicing my dodging skills.

Perhaps his behaviour has resulted in him being told to not come to any more munches by that group. I am surprised it was allowed to continue on the night in question....from what I have heard, one breach of the etiquette and trust of everyone would have been enough to have at least a verbal reprimand delivered by someone, if not his being asked to leave immediately.

Catalina

 

[tealsphynx]

Perhaps his behaviour has resulted in him being told to not come to any more munches by that group. I am surprised it was allowed to continue on the night in question....from what I have heard, one breach of the etiquette and trust of everyone would have been enough to have at least a verbal reprimand delivered by someone, if not his being asked to leave immediately.

Catalina

You took the words from my mouth catalina. We had an individual in our local group here that I'm not sure if she left before she was kicked out, or if she was kicked out.

 

[Aeroil]

but most of the femsubs think you guys rock, dear.

Precisely why all my friends seem to be femsubs .

 

[Rrrosyn]

All in One

Thanks all for your words about this incident. And thanks to tealsphynx for allowing the mini hijack.

I am pleased to hear how many male subs would stand up for their Dommes. I can't believe how looked down upon some of you are by other men. You're heads above them imho.

As to the non-gentleman in question. It was a very small munch and he performed the deed on his way out the door. He'd only kissed the two female pyls and I was the only FemDom there. I don't think he kissed the host's wife. Perhaps the others felt he had that right or maybe they liked his forcefulness, I cannot say. I know I did talk with the host and he can't stand the guy either. We just basically assume he won't show up again. Esp. since he slammed the grp for its other rules and then offered to hold his own play parties.

Jerks exist everywhere in life, guess we should expect it in this aspect too. *sighs*

 

[Etoile]

Just a real brief comment on "patriotism" - is it patriotic to want to leave my country? I think America is really going downhill. As a queer dyke who is an atheist, I am not liking the way my country is going - and if the Democrats don't win the White House in 2008, I'm going to be very nervous. So yeah, I want to move to Canada, where I can get married and not be under the religious right's thumb and so forth. And I think my feelings are still patriotic, because one of the fundamental things about America is that we can leave if we want to. I support the American ideal of freedom, including the freedom to leave.

 

[tealsphynx]

Just a real brief comment on "patriotism" - is it patriotic to want to leave my country? I think America is really going downhill. As a queer dyke who is an atheist, I am not liking the way my country is going - and if the Democrats don't win the White House in 2008, I'm going to be very nervous. So yeah, I want to move to Canada, where I can get married and not be under the religious right's thumb and so forth. And I think my feelings are still patriotic, because one of the fundamental things about America is that we can leave if we want to. I support the American ideal of freedom, including the freedom to leave.

That's the beauty of being American. You don't like it you can (try) to fight it to make it right (which lets face it...doesn't really work any more) Or leave. There's no penalty for leaving the country and becoming a citizen elsewhere. I honestly think it's time for Americans to read the Declaration of Independence, I mean REALLY read it and learn what it says. There's something in there about how our government can be changed if we don't like the way it's being run, and as a people we not only have the right, but the responsibility to. Sadly there's not enough to support it, and it would probably end up in another civil war...and people don't like war. I don't like how the religious sector puts restrictions on those of us that don't believe the way they do, because they're "offended" by us. Maybe we're offended by them. Maybe I get tired of the church mailers I get in my mailbox. I didn't ask for them. Again, I'm getting off this one before I get too started. [/America soapbox]