ok you female subs

[Trinique_Fire]

Hmmmmmmm I think you are the identical twin of My Swedish slave! One "look" can create so many different responses within one submissive.
It is nice to see you here and I hope to see more of you practicing your Lit posting ~~smile~~

Thank you SD. Obviously, this is the first time I've been back since I last posted, and I see that this thread has expanded. I'll have to go back and read these new posts.

 

[flowerchilde]

*blush* Thank you, I look forward to sharing my point of view and reading all the interesting ideas that have been posted. This seems to be a very intelligent group of people and I look forward to many stimulating conversations! lol

Luv ya all,
Flowerchild

 

[Cherrysweetdeal]

hmmm quiet....time to question...

Here is one for both top and bottom.

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

....it was quiet I had to.

cherry

 

[Shadowsdream]

Here is one for both top and bottom.

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

....it was quiet I had to.

cherry

Hello Cherrysweetdeal

I look forward to the replies to your question...it is a very good question which will give more insight both to Dom/mes looking to begin new relationships and submissives as well...it is often what appears to be the "small stuff" that has the biggest impact on a relationship.

Thank you for posing it ~~smile~~

 

[flowerchilde]

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

Great question! My favorite part of the relationship I'm in right now is the care and tenderness I feel from my Dom, he truely cares about me and I trust him with my life. That is rare for me as I'm not normally a very trusting person, but I've put my life in his hands many times and felt the strength of his love for me in many ways. I can feel his love in the way he knows just how to make me crazy for him and can make me horny with just his words. Our connection is more than purely physical, we are connected right down deep in our souls and minds. It's not only a body fuck, but a mind fuck as well when we are together.

Second question...This is a tough one...There is something freeing about surrendering your will to someone else, that feeling that there is nothing I can do about this makes it easier to enjoy the sensations. I'm not worried about doing the right thing, as long as he's in charge I can't fail. I guess it's just the simple act of giving up control that makes me melt I can't put it any other way.

 

[Cherrysweetdeal]

Second question...This is a tough one...

I like to make people think sometimes and explore their own lives and ideals. It's more interesting that way.

 

[flowerchilde]

I like to make people think sometimes and explore their own lives and ideals. It's more interesting that way.

Oh, most certainly! I love thought provoking questions! I think there is something insanely sexy about being intelligent, smart thinkers turn me on more than anything else. I find the smarter you are the better sex is, there are so many connections between the mind and sexualtiy that I can't imagine being with someone who wasn't my intellectual equal.

 

[shy slave]

Here is one for both top and bottom.

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

....it was quiet I had to.

cherry

Hi cherry
SD is right they're interesting questions.

Not sure I have a favourite part of a relationship, each bit is different and a 'favourite' in its own right.

Andante treats me in different ways at different times; depending on our respective moods or the place he wants to take me to, both mind and body.

There are times when his voice alone can make me drop into that space where my whole focus is either on him as a whole person or one aspect of him for example his lips, eyes or voice.

Not sure its sub-space but its an intense time which helps me switch off from everything else.

I love to try and tease through topping from the bottom. He finds it amusing and I never succeed but when I am in that mood I know I am having fun but also testing him as a Dom and a man. Re-assuring myself he is a strong person.

Each time he laughs or simply half-smiles; ignores my reasoning and well-thought out arguements I melt.

The loss of personal power needs to be combined with his voice, his touch, the mind frame I am in and the knowledge that I trust him ~completely.

Knowing that wherever he takes me I trust him to take care of me and bring me back safely. Mentally back in one piece at the end.

Its not just the loss of power in a scene that can make me melt, its that day-to-day control even though we are physically apart.
The control is in ordinary everyday conversations, not always with a sexual or 'I am in charge' overbearing elements but small quiet ways that gently remind me who I am.

Edited for poor spelling, poor grammer and poor english. I will start proof reading posts, I will, I will...

 

[Kajira Callista]

Here is one for both top and bottom.

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

....it was quiet I had to.

cherry

acceptance and understanding.

 

[Cherrysweetdeal]

Oh, most certainly! I love thought provoking questions! I think there is something insanely sexy about being intelligent, smart thinkers turn me on more than anything else. I find the smarter you are the better sex is, there are so many connections between the mind and sexualtiy that I can't imagine being with someone who wasn't my intellectual equal.

My bf always tells me not to sleep with anyone crazier then yourself... but I like people to be crazy rather then predictable...now back to the topic. That is the one thing I enjoy about him when I am around.

The idea that he knows what I like and he'll use it against me. Just makes me melt. Knowing he can hold me down physically but also control my body and mind absolutely blows me away. He understands that I am not like everyone else and that although I do enjoy what he does sometimes it's more fun to not get it. Since things are long distance now I am wondering what will happen and part of me knows it will be delicious, another part of me is still fearful of what may happen though.

The ability that my bf has understanding what makes me tick and how he notices the small reactions makes me melt and just smile. He knows his voice and touch send shivers down my back... must not think to hard before bed ...

Thank you A/all for the responses and it is awesome reading everyone's opinion.

not used to the dom word for B yet,
cherry

 

[Seduce]

Hi cherry
SD is right they're interesting questions.

Not sure I have a favourite part of a relationship, each bit is different and a 'favourite' in its own right.

Andante treats me in different ways at different times; depending on our respective moods or the place he wants to take me to, both mind and body.

There are times when his voice alone can make me drop into that space where my whole focus is either on him as a whole person or one aspect of him for example his lip, eyes or voice.

Not sure its sub-space but its an intense time which helps me switch off from everything else.

I love to try and tease throigh topping from the bottom. He finds it amusing and I never succeed but when I am in that mood I know I am having fun but also testing him as a Dom and a man. Re-assuring myself he is a strong person.

Each time he time he laughs or simply half-smiles; ignores my reasoning and well-though arguements I melt.

The loss of personal power needs to be combined with his voice, his touch, the mind frame I am in and the knowledge that I trust him ~completely.

Knowing that wherever he takes me I trust him to take care of me and bring me back safely. Mentally back in one piece at the end.

Its not just the loss of power in a scene that can make me melt, its that day-to-day control even though we are physically apart.
The control is in ordinary everyday conversations, not always with a sexual or 'I am in charge' overbearing elements but small quiet ways that gently remind me who I am.

Shy, that is just delightful what you wrote here.
I am sincerely glad you found the man in your life you can feel towards the way you do

 

[shy slave]

Shy, that is just delightful what you wrote here.
I am sincerely glad you found the man in your life you can feel towards the way you do

Thanks its taken a long time to find the right person, and the looking around time was fun , but I am so glad we have now found each other.

 

[serijules]

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

cherry

Favourite part? Our friendship. The most secure relationships in my opinion, are those where both people value each other's friendship above all else. To know that even if our D/s interaction would to die out, that we would still be very close friends and respect each other's feelings and respect that sometimes, things just change. I take much comfort in this, knowing that while our relationship may change at some point, our friendship is everlasting. Even if we were to unintentionally hurt each other, I have faith that our friendship is strong enough that we would eventually get past it and preserve that closeness. I've been in a few failed relationships, and the thing I miss the most, the thing that hurt me the most, was the fact that the other person didn't feel that our friendship was worth preserving. D and I's relationship is very strong on all levels so I have no real worries (although I do have my moments of self doubt)...I have no real worries that we won't be together for a very long time...one way or another.

The loss of power...makes me melt because with D, it isn't a game. It isn't a fantasy. It is the very core of what we are and our interaction with one another on a D/s level. I am always submissive to her. There is no off switch on that. There is no choice on that. There is such a deep security in knowing that no matter what may be happening in a given moment, there is that one constant, the constant loss of power on my behalf, to Her.

 

[Esclava]

Here is one for both top and bottom.

What is your favourite part of the relationship, it can be anything the way the person speaks or looks at you or treats you or the whole aspect. What about the loss/gain of power makes you melt?

....it was quiet I had to.

cherry

Oh my ... here we go with the thought provoking again ...

Right now, I would have to say that my favorite part is how my Dom/mes drive me toward orgasm, yet withhold it until They are ready. Unfortunately, orgasm is an involuntary act and I am a FE - so, I cannot hide when They have pushed me over the edge; or when I have been disobedient.

But the voice of One I serve is special and can call me into submission by simply speaking the word, "Come." I am a true sucker for a voice that sounds like Lurch (the butler in The Addams Family original series). It is a "sensory thing" and the timbre and pitch have such an effect on me - not only does it make me melt ... but will leave me walking around with wet panties all day ...

Esclava

 

[Esclava]

It's quiet in here ...

Submission - What does it TRULY mean to you?

As I continue this journey with the matched set of Dom/mes in my real life, something interesting occurs to me. When I leave their company - even though sated sexually and I feel strongly that I have been submissive to their desires - the entire next week my personality takes on a distinctly dominant aura. I am more assertive (and definitely more agressive) with others in my workplace, my family and other venues of life. Not rude - it's more like I place demands on people to pull their own weight instead of being towed by others - to find their inner well of strength and use it - instead of draining others.

It's almost as though - through my submission to MV and ML - I am finding a path to the dominant one deep within. So, to answer my own question, my submission means I am opening windows to myself that have previously been closed, exorcising demons which have instilled fear in me for years and rising from ashes as though a phoenix; unfurling my wings to soar in places I have only dreamed of.

What say You (if you have ever ventured through a submissive state)? And what say you; who are submissive now?

Esclava

 

[landcruisergal]

I have a tendency to become co-dependent in my relationships, and have a bad track record for people taking advantage of me in some way or another.
I am a people pleaser.I know I have this flaw, and often swing to the other extreme to compensate.
Through my submission, I can strive to satisfy anothers needs without consideration for self,and he can take full advantage of my trust in him, unlike in usual relationships.
I can be used and be content; not resentful or thinking I am failing myself in some way.

This has made my working life and other relationships more honest..I can focus on what gets the job done best, my leadership skills have very much improved at work, and I can enjoy anothers company without bending over backwards to make them happy, or freezing them out and being a bitch..

 

[Shadowsdream]

It's quiet in here ...

Submission - What does it TRULY mean to you?

As I continue this journey with the matched set of Dom/mes in my real life, something interesting occurs to me. When I leave their company - even though sated sexually and I feel strongly that I have been submissive to their desires - the entire next week my personality takes on a distinctly dominant aura. I am more assertive (and definitely more agressive) with others in my workplace, my family and other venues of life. Not rude - it's more like I place demands on people to pull their own weight instead of being towed by others - to find their inner well of strength and use it - instead of draining others.

It's almost as though - through my submission to MV and ML - I am finding a path to the dominant one deep within. So, to answer my own question, my submission means I am opening windows to myself that have previously been closed, exorcising demons which have instilled fear in me for years and rising from ashes as though a phoenix; unfurling my wings to soar in places I have only dreamed of.

What say You (if you have ever ventured through a submissive state)? And what say you; who are submissive now?

Esclava

I think of the toys I own and their submission to Me. I think of it daily and how different each is.

In My presense all are obvious as they drop their eyes and blush from a single word or the placement of a finger. All obey without question quickly and happily. All drop to their knees and crawl to Me to sit at My feet without hesitation. All desire the honor of placing their heads upon My knee to be stroked and loved for good behaviour.

Most live in different Countries and it is out of My presense that shows a different side to their submission. Most but not all call Me every day at the same time and leave long messages on My answering machine if I am not home. These ones will call several times in a day needing the comfort of My voice. One calls Me morning and night to report on his day and to get direction or permission when in doubt to My expectations. One calls when reminded or he can't stand the lack of personal contact a second longer. he "feels" he is with me as he goes about preparing his home for sale so that he can live permanently at My feet in a different Country.

All do their best to obey long distant orders, some fail more than others. One never fails. They all submit...their needs are all different as are their personalities...ALL fit Me perfectly and none would be enough as a single sub/slave to fulfill the complexities of My desires.

 

[Esclava]

I think of the toys I own and their submission to Me. I think of it daily and how different each is.

<snip>...ALL fit Me perfectly and none would be enough as a single sub/slave to fulfill the complexities of My desires.

Yes, each IS different and each one DOES fulfill a different desire for you. I've not yet come to grips with the thought of being one in a circle of subs for a single Dom/me (or the two I am with for that matter-as they are currently in search of at least 2 other subs). It is a bridge I shall cross when that time comes.

I am honored to have been allowed a peek into your world, MShadowsdream. Thank you ~

Esclava

 

[princess4u]

It's quiet in here ...

Submission - What does it TRULY mean to you?

my submission is my freedom - being bound in submission unbinds me
from my inhibitions - it raises me up to be my strongest person -
it enables me

 

[Shadowsdream]

Yes, each IS different and each one DOES fulfill a different desire for you. I've not yet come to grips with the thought of being one in a circle of subs for a single Dom/me (or the two I am with for that matter-as they are currently in search of at least 2 other subs). It is a bridge I shall cross when that time comes.

I am honored to have been allowed a peek into your world, MShadowsdream. Thank you ~

Esclava

Good morning Esclava

It has generally been My experience that multiple female subs under one Dominant will have more difficulties and will need a firmer more constant hand. The males seem to often be looking for the typical type of lifestyle that I live and do not seem to have as many insecurity or possessive issues.

Though I have also seen the occassional successful long term multiple female sub/slave relationships withing a Dom/me family arrangement.

I believe that there needs to be a desire on the part of the sub/slave to live this difficult poly type of relationship for their own reasons for success to be joyful on both sides of the whip.

I choose My toys not only through My desires but also for the compatability they will have with each other.

 

[nusubgurl]

Freedom

my submission is my freedom - being bound in submission unbinds me
from my inhibitions - it raises me up to be my strongest person -
it enables me

These are my feelings exactly. although i have no Master as present, i am being tutored by an experienced Master (i met His sub/wife on collarme and she introduced us) and have been able to finally isolate what i feel and really start to identify what i need from my own Master.

My job is great, but tough. I love my responsibilities in the community, my family, etc. etc. But i live for the moment He closes the door on the outside world and physically separates me from that burden on my shoulders. it's freedom, but not like running away and abandoning my resposibilities, it's like He's teaching me to take care of myself and my own needs first. i have never done a good job of taking care of myself first. that's the sub in me..someone else is always more important than me... and that's the true perfection of the D/s relationship: I need Him as much as He seeks me. someone has a quote on their sig that says a sub without a Dom is still a sub, but a Dom with out a sub is just a person with a bunch of unused toys.

i am attending my first munch next saturday!! my tutor has selected two gentlemen to introduce to me...i'm nervous!!!!!!

 

[Netzach]

It's quiet in here ...

Submission - What does it TRULY mean to you?

As I continue this journey with the matched set of Dom/mes in my real life, something interesting occurs to me. When I leave their company - even though sated sexually and I feel strongly that I have been submissive to their desires - the entire next week my personality takes on a distinctly dominant aura. I am more assertive (and definitely more agressive) with others in my workplace, my family and other venues of life. Not rude - it's more like I place demands on people to pull their own weight instead of being towed by others - to find their inner well of strength and use it - instead of draining others.

It's almost as though - through my submission to MV and ML - I am finding a path to the dominant one deep within. So, to answer my own question, my submission means I am opening windows to myself that have previously been closed, exorcising demons which have instilled fear in me for years and rising from ashes as though a phoenix; unfurling my wings to soar in places I have only dreamed of.

What say You (if you have ever ventured through a submissive state)? And what say you; who are submissive now?

Esclava

That actually makes a lot of sense to me. I started out identifying as a switch and VERY heavily leaning towards the bottom, with the intent to learn as much as I could about myself, knowing on some intuitive level that this was a transitional state for me, and it would feed my development as a Top.

It worked very well, but I've always been a very experiential, 3-D, in person, demo-oriented learner. I learn by relating things to my own experience, and things that seem to have little connection or that I cannot connect to my own experiences don't hold much interest for me. Maybe it's sheer narcissism, but I don't think it is, because it's helped bridge the distance between me and people and situations that are radically different from me on the surface.

If you choose to engage as a Dominant, Esclava, I sense that you will be one of the wiser, more compassionate, more READY Dominants out there. Your thinking and your experiences that you bring to the table, your concern and your sense of personal responsibility (I think slavery/service sure DOES teach that sense of responsibility, owning your actions, and tests our "can I look myself in the mirror if I do/don't do XYZ?" levels)...these things come through in the questions you are asking.

 

[serijules]

I have found that the best Dom/me's are those that either have a bottom side, or started out as bottoms. Not to say this is necessary to be a good Dom/me, not at all, but in my experience it does make for a very wise and well rounded Dominant.

 

[Netzach]

I have found that the best Dom/me's are those that either have a bottom side, or started out as bottoms. Not to say this is necessary to be a good Dom/me, not at all, but in my experience it does make for a very wise and well rounded Dominant.

Or at the least it says I am a "curiosity killed the cat" kinda gal.

 

[Esclava]

That actually makes a lot of sense to me. I started out identifying as a switch and VERY heavily leaning towards the bottom, with the intent to learn as much as I could about myself, knowing on some intuitive level that this was a transitional state for me, and it would feed my development as a Top.

It worked very well, but I've always been a very experiential, 3-D, in person, demo-oriented learner. I learn by relating things to my own experience, and things that seem to have little connection or that I cannot connect to my own experiences don't hold much interest for me. Maybe it's sheer narcissism, but I don't think it is, because it's helped bridge the distance between me and people and situations that are radically different from me on the surface.

YES! I understand this. I have to agree with it not being narcissistic - it is VERY difficult to relate to experiences you have never had. Because of the truly horrible first R/L experience I had with BDSM, I would have stayed away from it forever - if not for the online Dom who allowed me to experience something I had never felt. He allowed me to expose myself again without fear of decapitation - which is what I ran from when released from my first R/L Dom.

Most submissives, who go through a bad patch with a Dom/me, need understanding more than anything else (perhaps this applies to submissives in general). They need to feel secure in the fact that what they have to offer is as valuable to them as to Someone else. My O/L knew this and we talked - for 2 months - before He asked me if He sounded like the kind of Master I needed. I said yes because even though we knew it was transitional in nature; I had to crawl out of the chrysalis I had been encased in for 10 years. And even though it was not real life, my mind had to be re-trained to trust again; so when I did venture out in real life, I would do so with the strength and support attained from interaction with Him. (I'm feeling a bit exposed here ... but there is where I've found my greatest growth)

If you choose to engage as a Dominant, Esclava, I sense that you will be one of the wiser, more compassionate, more READY Dominants out there. Your thinking and your experiences that you bring to the table, your concern and your sense of personal responsibility (I think slavery/service sure DOES teach that sense of responsibility, owning your actions, and tests our "can I look myself in the mirror if I do/don't do XYZ?" levels)...these things come through in the questions you are asking.

Thank you, Net. Your words are not very different from some I've heard from both my o/l and r/l Dom/mes. MV said, "I have heard the Dominant in you - in your "out loud" self talk as you submit to our hands." That speaks of the ability to dominate myself. Which some will say smacks of 'TFTB"; but, if I cannot harness the submissive in me, how can I possibly offer those reins to Another? I must WANT to subjugate my will to the desires of another before it can actually happen. Therein is where I feel submissives have the ability to "dominate" themselves.

For me (and I suspect for anyone I would Domme), it is not a senseless giving over of my will to that of Someone else. It is an intelligent decision made when They have shown that I possess something pleasing to Them and that They have proven Their willingness to take on the responsibility of caring for me in my submissiveness. It is not a responsibility to be taken lightly; nor with a cavalier attitude.

If I ever do transition to Domme - I will remember the wise words of the many Dommes I have learned from - both here and in R/L.

Esclava