the annoyances of being trans and interested in bdsm

[mellian]

snip

who this 'he' your talking about?

-mellian

 

[sigsauerprinces]

who this 'he' your talking about?

-mellian

he=you.

 

[mellian]

To have a sense of humor, you must be capable of laughing, not going off half-cocked at every possible opportunity when people are only trying to give you the advice and opinions you solicit when you post on the board.

how does one show laughter on a message board? Johnny may be trying to give advice and to be funny, he is doing so with insulting language and he is not funny, at all, and that doesn't mean i have no sense of humour.

Damn, and I thought I was cranky. You win the prize. [/B]

say what you want about how i am, you will never know for sure without knowing me in person.

-mellian

 

[mellian]

he=you.

no, me = she.

-mellian

 

[Etoile]

The only thing more pathetic than straightforward bullying is this passive-aggressive "gee can't you take a joke" bullshit. I'm suprised the gay bacon lettuce and tomato moderator is taking your back on this one--she's usually pretty quick on the trigger.

Confused now - which mod did you mean? You do realize this isn't in GLBT Chatter, right? There's not a damn thing I can do with the posts in this thread. (Not that I would - this thread would look exactly the same if it were in GLBT Chatter, except that Johnny might not have seen it in the first place.)

 

[rosco rathbone]

Originally posted by mellian ]gender identity and sexuality are two different things.



thanks.

-mellian

I stand corrected--my theory is a bit shakey--just a humble construction worker dontcha know.

 

[Etoile]

no, me = she.

Totally in agreement here. Although genetically you will always be XY, mellian, if you identify as MTF trans then you are female. (I know you know this, I'm just sayin'.)

Even in online forums where I know somebody's RL gender is different from the gender they portray online, I always use the pronouns they associate with themselves. It's a matter of respect.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Confused now - which mod did you mean? You do realize this isn't in GLBT Chatter, right? There's not a damn thing I can do with the posts in this thread. (Not that I would - this thread would look exactly the same if it were in GLBT Chatter, except that Johnny might not have seen it in the first place.)

By mod I mean you. I know that you don't have modificatory powers over this thread; I'm just suprised at your attitude. But what the fuck do I know.

 

[mellian]

mellian, I think you're not taking the initial posts in the spirit to which they were meant.

insensitive joking, which made is attempt at giving advice a failure? just pointing out his mistakes. if he wants to give advance to trans fokes, i suggest he avoids making joke about genetalia and doing his 'dude, chica, dude, chica', and to respect the gender they identify as.

I doubt that Johnny was attempting to attack you in any way with his comment.. and if you felt unamused by the teasing remark, all you had to do was say, 'I don't feel it's a joking matter, I'm looking for serious replies.' and I'm sure he would have done exactly that.

i don't mind jokes and etc, just that his insensitive and insulting.

Looking over the posts, it just seems to me like all that's going on here is an escalation of hostility over a comment you didn't like, to the point that you're just attacking everything said if it's not 'oh, mellian, how mean Johnny was to you. Bad Johnny! Bad!'. (At this point, I'd offer to spank Johnny with a rolled up newspaper for illustration, but he'd probably spank back. )

if there is any hostility, it is not coming from me. i just pointing his mistakes and his immaturity.

Perhaps taking a deep breath, and relaxing, would help you to calm down a bit, and not take everything so seriously. Just my .02 cents.. it's probably not even worth that.

just because i reply and point out the insults and etc doesn't mean i am taking this seriously.

-mellian

 

[mellian]

Totally in agreement here. Although genetically you will always be XY, mellian, if you identify as MTF trans then you are female. (I know you know this, I'm just sayin'.)

i just identity as trans or ts female.

Even in online forums where I know somebody's RL gender is different from the gender they portray online, I always use the pronouns they associate with themselves. It's a matter of respect.

i don't portray, i am female.

-mellian

 

[Etoile]

i just identity as trans or ts female.

Okay, perhaps I should have said if you are MTF trans. Which you are. But I can understand why you identify as trans female.

i don't portray, i am female.

I know that. I was referring to all online forums I'm in where people may portray a different gender. You don't have to be defensive to everyone, okay? Some of us understand your predicament better than you realize.

 

[sunfox]

Okay, perhaps I should have said if you are MTF trans. Which you are. But I can understand why you identify as trans female.

I know that. I was referring to all online forums I'm in where people may portray a different gender. You don't have to be defensive to everyone, okay? Some of us understand your predicament better than you realize.

I suspect, Etoile, that it will not matter whether you understand or not. Sometimes people are just looking for a fight, and it seems that's what mellian is doing.

For what it's worth, I've always found your posts informative and well written, and polite. Not all of us have something to prove.

 

[mellian]

I suspect, Etoile, that it will not matter whether you understand or not. Sometimes people are just looking for a fight, and it seems that's what mellian is doing.

what is with you making assumptions?

-mellian

 

[sunfox]

what is with you making assumptions?

-mellian

What I said, if you care to actually read anything before sniping at it like a child, is that you -seem- to be looking for a fight. That's not an assumption. It's a supposition. However, that grammar buddy clarification said...

Thanks for proving my point.

 

[Mr Blonde]

Enough of this nonsense

Why is everyone wasting time on this stupid piece of shit? Put the idiot on ignore and let's get back to discussing BDSM. There are a dozen good threads on the front page so let's spend our energies on something relevant.

 

[sunfox]

Re: Enough of this nonsense

Why is everyone wasting time on this stupid piece of shit? Put the idiot on ignore and let's get back to discussing BDSM. There are a dozen good threads on the front page so let's spend our energies on something relevant.

LMAO!

I know, I know. I'm a glutton for punishment, what can I say?

 

[lark sparrow]

"Stupid piece of shit? Idiot? And relevant?"

I may definitely not agree with everything she says, and hopefully we see things in our thirties we didn't in our twenties, but that seems a bit harsh (lol not that I have never been so!)

I'm glad you are still posting, mellian!

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

oh i see, to have a thick skin, one must accept asshole, arrogant, and ignorant remarks without saying a thing, while laughing at jokes that are not even funny to have a sense of humour.

his so called jokes can be compared to jokes base on race, religion, disability and etc. Sorry if i am not one to laugh at them.

-mellian

No, to post on the board you have to tolerate certain things...for instance, you have engaged in constant name-calling, and I've responded with humor, for the most part. Lighten up, hey? I'm just words on a screen, and you have enough problems with your plumbing, without worrying about me.

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

Totally in agreement here. Although genetically you will always be XY, mellian, if you identify as MTF trans then you are female. (I know you know this, I'm just sayin'.)

This is the issue I was poking fun at...and let's be completely honest here, I'm absolutely 100% sure that there are pre-op transexuals that get a kick out of joking around with the contradictions. It wasn't a very sensitive way to go about things, but what value is there in sensitivity? Shall I say "Oh, poor mellian, please let me validate everything you post, every emotion you have, let's all have a group hug now"?

I dunno...Etoile, you tell me, you know unconventionally-gendered people better than I do: is there humor in this, or is it just me?

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

Thank you, all my supporters...nice to know I still have a fan club around here!!

Mellian, good luck with the plumbing repair and stuff...

 

[catalina_francisco]

I dunno...Etoile, you tell me, you know unconventionally-gendered people better than I do: is there humor in this, or is it just me?

LOL, my experience when I ran a GLBT group was humour was a big asset. We had 4 transgender members (3 x MtF; 1 x FtM) out of 20 regulars and they were the ones who brought the most humor to the group, were happy to explain to new members exactly how it all worked, and one was even heavily active in the BDSM community with an over supply of interested prospective partners. Is all in your comfort zone for most IMO.

Catalina

 

[mellian]

No, to post on the board you have to tolerate certain things...for instance, you have engaged in constant name-calling, and I've responded with humor, for the most part. Lighten up, hey?

constant name calling? :wtf: where have i done that exactly?

anyway, i am telling you some of your attempts at humour sucks, so take a clue gave it up please.

I'm just words on a screen, and you have enough problems with your plumbing, without worrying about me.

what is your problem for needing to always make stupid comments like that?

-mellian

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

Hey, its not my fault...some people actually think I am funnier than a burlap sack full of monkeys...

And, ummm....don't you actually have a physical issue going on here?

I guess there are 3 types of people in the world; type one goes out of their way to be sympathetic for the 14 year old in the wheelchair, some people ignore it and treat the kid as normal. The third type(which is me), will ask the kid if he'd like his wheelchair more if it had spinning razors, flamethrowers, and a pontoon and outboard motor for amphibious missions.

I'm not sure if that makes any sense.

 

[mellian]

LOL, my experience when I ran a GLBT group was humour was a big asset. We had 4 transgender members (3 x MtF; 1 x FtM) out of 20 regulars and they were the ones who brought the most humor to the group, were happy to explain to new members exactly how it all worked, and one was even heavily active in the BDSM community with an over supply of interested prospective partners. Is all in your comfort zone for most IMO.

Catalina

one thing to have jokes from TSes who knows what the are talking, and it is another when someone who is not a TS or trans to do without truely having any real understanding of TSes.

-mellian

 

[mellian]

I guess there are 3 types of people in the world; type one goes out of their way to be sympathetic for the 14 year old in the wheelchair, some people ignore it and treat the kid as normal. The third type(which is me), will ask the kid if he'd like his wheelchair more if it had spinning razors, flamethrowers, and a pontoon and outboard motor for amphibious missions.

I'm not sure if that makes any sense.

in this case, you are more like making a joke about the kids disability.

like seriously, i don't need some constant remember about my genitalia. I had others before make trans related jokes, but not ones directed at something which already bloody annoying as is.

-mellian