The 'ethics' of casual 'bdsm'

[RuReal]

I asked him how he felt about casual sex and he evaded that anser Geoff so you have really hit the nail on the head.

No, you don't.

You recommend "love" because female submissives will be "used" by "abusers" if they get involved in "casual BDSM".

Nothing I've seen you write cautions male submissives. Nothing I've seen you write warns off female Dominants from being used by male submissives. Hell, nothing you've written addresses the male Doms who get hoodwinked and sucked in by emotionally, physically, and financially draining female submissives.

By your definition and description - any "casual" relationship that doesn't involve "love is "unethical".

Again, the BDSM aspect of any relationship, in and of itself, is irrelevant. A BDSM relationship, just like any other relationship is either practiced in an ethical, healthy way, or it is practiced in an unethical, unhealthy way whether the participants are "in love" or not.

Quit harping on BDSM unless you are going to harp on "casual" vanilla sexual relationships. And "casual" business relationships. And "casual" friendship relationships.

It's the PEOPLE, not the activity, that are or are not ethical and/or unhealthy.

 

[BLoved]

No, you don't.

You recommend "love" because female submissives will be "used" by "abusers" if they get involved in "casual BDSM".

Nothing I've seen you write cautions male submissives.

Are you afraid male submissives are too stupid to transpose feminine/masculine pronouns?

Give the audience a little credit for intelligence.

 

[CutieMouse]

Are you afraid male submissives are too stupid to transpose feminine/masculine pronouns?

Give the audience a little credit for intelligence.

Are you afraid female submissives are too stupid to think for themselves? Give your audience a little credit for intelligence.

From your posts I have learned [your opinion] that I shouldn't read any books about BDSM because they will tell me the only way of engaging in BDSM is through "casual" relationships - and apparently I am too naive to ignore the bits that don't apply to my situation. (Which is what I've done, BTW)

From your posts I have learned [your opinion] that I shouldn't attend any seminars/meetings/munches because the people there will force me to engage in "casual" BDSM - and apparently I am too weak willed to say "no thank you". (Which is what I've done, BTW)

From your posts I have learned [your opinion] I shouldn't be a member of any BDSM/kink based websites, because said websites are full of bad people who only want to use and abuse me - and apparently I am incapable of recognizing the difference between a PM with genuine interest in friendship, and a PM from an asshole simply wanting to get off. (I haven't gotten an inappropriate, suggestive PM at Lit in years, I've never received one at Fet, I had a CM account a few years ago and got one or two - which I simply corrected/edited in red, and sent back otherwise untouched.)

But then, after all your cautions advice, all your worries that anything a submissive might read, experience, or be exposed to somehow damaging her fragile little self, you arrive at the answer... you. Every bit of information/knowledge/advice that you approve of, only gets your approval because it is filtered through you.

So do you think submissives are too stupid to reach their own conclusions/make their own decisions re: BDSM?

 

[Xelebes]

I am saying casual 'bdsm' is emotionally unhealthy.

I recommend love because it is healthy.

You have a peculiar definition of love.

 

[Xelebes]

Are you afraid male submissives are too stupid to transpose feminine/masculine pronouns?

Give the audience a little credit for intelligence.

Give the audience a little credit for intelligence. Replacing pronouns does squat with your prose.

 

[Stella_Omega]

You have a peculiar definition of love.

Xelebes, pick one thread, any thread-- They are all the same. We don't need all of them at the top of the page all the time, do we?

Whichever one you pick, I'll stick to too.

 

[Xelebes]

Alright we can do that. So.... how about the stock markets?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Alright we can do that. So.... how about the stock markets?

Eesh! I'd rather hide my head in the sand-- or in someone's groin.

 

[Xelebes]

BP's stock is taking a pounding the last couple weeks. I wonder why?

 

[chy_girl]

Eesh! I'd rather hide my head in the sand-- or in someone's groin.

Are you looking for volunteers?

 

[chy_girl]

Are you afraid male submissives are too stupid to transpose feminine/masculine pronouns?

Give the audience a little credit for intelligence.

Perhaps you should give pyl's as a whole a little credit for intelligence.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Are you looking for volunteers?

Je n'ai personne sur ma dance card, yeah

 

[chy_girl]

Je n'ai personne sur ma dance card, yeah

Forgive the moment of ignorance, but what does that translate to in English?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Forgive the moment of ignorance, but what does that translate to in English?

It means; "Stella is being a dork."

("I have no one on my dance card" in the french-and-english one of my characters is stumbling along with ATM. And really she would more likely know "Dance Card" is "Carte De Danse" than the construction "Je n'ai personne" meaming "I have no one...")

 

[midwestyankee]

BP's stock is taking a pounding the last couple weeks. I wonder why?

Yep, their financial engine does seem to be leaking oil. Must have blown a rod.

 

[Xelebes]

Yep, their financial engine does seem to be leaking oil. Must have blown a rod.

Or a blown gasket! Better take it to the shop, have a mechanic take a look under the hood and see what they can salvage.

 

[chy_girl]

It means; "Stella is being a dork."

("I have no one on my dance card" in the french-and-english one of my characters is stumbling along with ATM. And really she would more likely know "Dance Card" is "Carte De Danse" than the construction "Je n'ai personne" meaming "I have no one...")

LOL - You totally lost me on that last part - curse of the learning disability. And being a dork is good for people every now and then... it reminds them not to take life to seriously.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Yep, their financial engine does seem to be leaking oil. Must have blown a rod.

Or a blown gasket! Better take it to the shop, have a mechanic take a look under the hood and see what they can salvage.

Take it to AH, dudes.

 

[midwestyankee]

Take it to AH, dudes.

Je ne regrette rien.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Je ne regrette rien.

Hee hee!

 

[Xelebes]

Take it to AH, dudes.

Ah come on, we were just going to get the kinky part of this segue! What with all of the talk on lube, ramrods and timed timing belts!

 

[warrior queen]

Perhaps you should give pyl's as a whole a little credit for intelligence.

are you kidding?
BLoved can't even grace a direct question with an answer!
all his credit goes to himself.