Trained to Come

DustyWolfe said:
Yeah, it's a lot of fun :D I love walking with her in a public place and leaning over, whispering into her ear "Cum for Daddy." I'm so evil :devil:
You naughty man you.
 
Blushing Bottom said:
IMHO this is an urban legend. It is my belief that sub can be trained to not cum but not cum on command.
I can assure you it's not an urban legend.
 
Blushing Bottom said:
IMHO this is an urban legend. It is my belief that sub can be trained to not cum but not cum on command.
Now there's one you won't find on Snopes.
 
Blushing Bottom said:
IMHO this is an urban legend. It is my belief that sub can be trained to not cum but not cum on command.
Why is that your belief? I mean what brought you to that conclusion?
 
Kajira Callista said:
i think that betticus meant that anyone can be trained to cum on command...and after trained they could be made to do it even if they didnt wanna.
Thats exactly what it means. My Wife/Domme and I have been training me for a while and last weekend she "forced" me to cum in front of some of our friends. Granted they are in the "lifestyle" but it was still against my will. On the other hand it was fun. After the fact.
 
Just came across a tool that might be incredibly helpful for the specific training involved with this: http://www.talkingheadvibrators.com - vibrators with a recordable audio chip in them! What a way to link your voice to your sub's sexual pleasure! Great for maintaining training while you're not available!
 
teresawrites2u said:
I’m terribly curious about being trained to orgasm on command. Is it an urban legend can a woman really do this? (My eye twitched just thinking about it.) :eek:


Yes it can be done. I have done it over the phone numerous times. It just takes time
 
FurryFury said:
Over the phone???

Really?

Fury :rose:


yes

and yes....Like i said it takes time, and maybe a connection. I have tried it with other girls and i have noticed it really didn't work. One reason is because we didn't do it a whole lot. This other woman we did it almost nightly.
 
Blushing Bottom said:
You naughty man you.

Actually, it has long been my understanding that most of the non-voluntary reactions are subject to rather simple Pavlovian conditioning.... To one extent or another..
:devil:
 
She lays on a stone alter bathed in warm light partly on her back and partly on her side as she draws her one leg up the other. One arm is stretched above her and she scratches listlessly with her nails on the stone as another twinge of pleasure tightens the muscles in her abdomen. A small groan escapes her throat as she feel a trickle of moisture squeeze out of her labia and find its way through the few sparse pubic hairs that line the edge of her lower lips. It finds its way to her inner most thigh and follows along till it escapes out the back and runs down her leg just under where the roundness of her ass cheek forms.

Her mind is filled with thoughts of him. He is all around her. His presence is smoldering kiss on her lips. Every laborious breath exhales more of her and every slow intake seems to draw more of him into her. Her breasts are soft yet her nipples are hardened. She can feel the nerve endings of her nipples tingle as they are drawn up tight.

She bites down softly on her finger as another twinge causes the muscles along her body to contract. She closes her eyes feeling the pleasure of it and slides her leg up and down causing friction between her moist lips. As her labia twist her inner lips slide against them tugging ever so slightly the hood surrounding her clitoris. Again her nails scratch the stone in pleasure.

She imagines his weight laying on her. She can feel his concentration upon her and she shrinks but he grabs her hair and pulls her chin straight upwards exposing her neck. His hot breath can be felt on her chin as his lips part and he closes his mouth upon the apex of her chin. She arches the small of her back lifting upwards, but his weight pushes down on her grinding and mashing her pubic bone with his thigh.

She can feel his hardness digging into her thigh. She can feel it pulsate with hot blood almost burning its mark upon her skin. His strong hand runs up along her arms grasping firmly her wrists and squeezing it till it almost hurts. He stretches her arms upwards and she feels her ribcage, breasts and underarms become taunt as he easily bends and stretches her body to his will.

His mouth now engulfing the side of her neck biting it. Her neck muscle caught in the grip of his teeth and he gnaws like an animal upon her. He is sucking energy from her feeding upon her. She cannot stop or resist she is in his grip of desire. He is taking her. He is using her to feed. She is helpless to resist and groans as another level of control is ripped from her. She rocks from side to side in pleasure. Her fingers spread and clench but his grip is too strong and he overpowers her. She begins to beg inside for him to take her. Her mind is numb by the intoxicating pleasure of her body. Her eyes begin to plead…”use me…use me….Please use me now!”

His body now pushes between her legs and she cannot stop him. His weight upon her is so exhilarating as her legs are parted. His belly presses down upon her exposed clit and she arches her back with clinched teeth. She gasped deeply as she feels him begin to slide upwards bringing his cock towards her opening. She thinks of its girth and it hardness. She holds her breath as her body anticipates the tapered bulbous head finding its mark and forcing her lips apart as it enters. She looks up and sees his eyes staring down into hers as his grip on her wrists tightens. Her breath quickens as the waves of pleasure build. She can feel his hardness now just now reaching her, parting her and sliding all the way up inside her. Ripping through the center of her being. Completely exposed with no defense she surrenders completely to his will.

He opens his mouth and says.

“Cum for me”

….

…….

She lays there holding herself arms crossed shivering and panting trying to catch her breath. Her body lays there on the stone alter bathed in the warm light shivering as the aftershocks of her orgasm continue to reverberate. He is not there. She is alone. She can hear a distant pleasant laughter…good girl. Catch your breath and we will begin again.
 
EKVITKAR said:
Actually, it has long been my understanding that most of the non-voluntary reactions are subject to rather simple Pavlovian conditioning.... To one extent or another..
:devil:
You may have a point here. I often thinking in the higher order of things forget the more simple methods as that of Classic Conditioning.

More research is in order.
 
I know for me that there was only one person who could excite me with his voice, the looks he gave me or just a simple touch would jolt me into an
orgasmic state.

He would tell me to cum and I would, after finishing with that orgasm I would quickly get ready for the onslaught of orgasms after that but only when he
said to try again.

I think it definitely depends on the person you're with or what excites you.
 
Now this, this is no Classic Conditioning and this is something I have had positive experience with but until today had believed I was the one who had controlled my sponteaneous orgasm. But the scenario you have described here is so in line with the images I created on that day I now see who was responsible for my orgasm though 40 miles way...him.

RJMasters said:
She lays on a stone alter bathed in warm light partly on her back and partly on her side as she draws her one leg up the other. One arm is stretched above her and she scratches listlessly with her nails on the stone as another twinge of pleasure tightens the muscles in her abdomen. A small groan escapes her throat as she feel a trickle of moisture squeeze out of her labia and find its way through the few sparse pubic hairs that line the edge of her lower lips. It finds its way to her inner most thigh and follows along till it escapes out the back and runs down her leg just under where the roundness of her ass cheek forms.

Her mind is filled with thoughts of him. He is all around her. His presence is smoldering kiss on her lips. Every laborious breath exhales more of her and every slow intake seems to draw more of him into her. Her breasts are soft yet her nipples are hardened. She can feel the nerve endings of her nipples tingle as they are drawn up tight.

She bites down softly on her finger as another twinge causes the muscles along her body to contract. She closes her eyes feeling the pleasure of it and slides her leg up and down causing friction between her moist lips. As her labia twist her inner lips slide against them tugging ever so slightly the hood surrounding her clitoris. Again her nails scratch the stone in pleasure.

She imagines his weight laying on her. She can feel his concentration upon her and she shrinks but he grabs her hair and pulls her chin straight upwards exposing her neck. His hot breath can be felt on her chin as his lips part and he closes his mouth upon the apex of her chin. She arches the small of her back lifting upwards, but his weight pushes down on her grinding and mashing her pubic bone with his thigh.

She can feel his hardness digging into her thigh. She can feel it pulsate with hot blood almost burning its mark upon her skin. His strong hand runs up along her arms grasping firmly her wrists and squeezing it till it almost hurts. He stretches her arms upwards and she feels her ribcage, breasts and underarms become taunt as he easily bends and stretches her body to his will.

His mouth now engulfing the side of her neck biting it. Her neck muscle caught in the grip of his teeth and he gnaws like an animal upon her. He is sucking energy from her feeding upon her. She cannot stop or resist she is in his grip of desire. He is taking her. He is using her to feed. She is helpless to resist and groans as another level of control is ripped from her. She rocks from side to side in pleasure. Her fingers spread and clench but his grip is too strong and he overpowers her. She begins to beg inside for him to take her. Her mind is numb by the intoxicating pleasure of her body. Her eyes begin to plead…”use me…use me….Please use me now!”

His body now pushes between her legs and she cannot stop him. His weight upon her is so exhilarating as her legs are parted. His belly presses down upon her exposed clit and she arches her back with clinched teeth. She gasped deeply as she feels him begin to slide upwards bringing his cock towards her opening. She thinks of its girth and it hardness. She holds her breath as her body anticipates the tapered bulbous head finding its mark and forcing her lips apart as it enters. She looks up and sees his eyes staring down into hers as his grip on her wrists tightens. Her breath quickens as the waves of pleasure build. She can feel his hardness now just now reaching her, parting her and sliding all the way up inside her. Ripping through the center of her being. Completely exposed with no defense she surrenders completely to his will.

He opens his mouth and says.

“Cum for me”

….

…….

She lays there holding herself arms crossed shivering and panting trying to catch her breath. Her body lays there on the stone alter bathed in the warm light shivering as the aftershocks of her orgasm continue to reverberate. He is not there. She is alone. She can hear a distant pleasant laughter…good girl. Catch your breath and we will begin again.
 
God, RJ. You do have a way with words, hon. Thanks for that. :kiss:

RJMasters said:
She lays on a stone alter bathed in warm light partly on her back and partly on her side as she draws her one leg up the other. One arm is stretched above her and she scratches listlessly with her nails on the stone as another twinge of pleasure tightens the muscles in her abdomen. A small groan escapes her throat as she feel a trickle of moisture squeeze out of her labia and find its way through the few sparse pubic hairs that line the edge of her lower lips. It finds its way to her inner most thigh and follows along till it escapes out the back and runs down her leg just under where the roundness of her ass cheek forms.

Her mind is filled with thoughts of him. He is all around her. His presence is smoldering kiss on her lips. Every laborious breath exhales more of her and every slow intake seems to draw more of him into her. Her breasts are soft yet her nipples are hardened. She can feel the nerve endings of her nipples tingle as they are drawn up tight.

She bites down softly on her finger as another twinge causes the muscles along her body to contract. She closes her eyes feeling the pleasure of it and slides her leg up and down causing friction between her moist lips. As her labia twist her inner lips slide against them tugging ever so slightly the hood surrounding her clitoris. Again her nails scratch the stone in pleasure.

She imagines his weight laying on her. She can feel his concentration upon her and she shrinks but he grabs her hair and pulls her chin straight upwards exposing her neck. His hot breath can be felt on her chin as his lips part and he closes his mouth upon the apex of her chin. She arches the small of her back lifting upwards, but his weight pushes down on her grinding and mashing her pubic bone with his thigh.

She can feel his hardness digging into her thigh. She can feel it pulsate with hot blood almost burning its mark upon her skin. His strong hand runs up along her arms grasping firmly her wrists and squeezing it till it almost hurts. He stretches her arms upwards and she feels her ribcage, breasts and underarms become taunt as he easily bends and stretches her body to his will.

His mouth now engulfing the side of her neck biting it. Her neck muscle caught in the grip of his teeth and he gnaws like an animal upon her. He is sucking energy from her feeding upon her. She cannot stop or resist she is in his grip of desire. He is taking her. He is using her to feed. She is helpless to resist and groans as another level of control is ripped from her. She rocks from side to side in pleasure. Her fingers spread and clench but his grip is too strong and he overpowers her. She begins to beg inside for him to take her. Her mind is numb by the intoxicating pleasure of her body. Her eyes begin to plead…”use me…use me….Please use me now!”

His body now pushes between her legs and she cannot stop him. His weight upon her is so exhilarating as her legs are parted. His belly presses down upon her exposed clit and she arches her back with clinched teeth. She gasped deeply as she feels him begin to slide upwards bringing his cock towards her opening. She thinks of its girth and it hardness. She holds her breath as her body anticipates the tapered bulbous head finding its mark and forcing her lips apart as it enters. She looks up and sees his eyes staring down into hers as his grip on her wrists tightens. Her breath quickens as the waves of pleasure build. She can feel his hardness now just now reaching her, parting her and sliding all the way up inside her. Ripping through the center of her being. Completely exposed with no defense she surrenders completely to his will.

He opens his mouth and says.

“Cum for me”

….

…….

She lays there holding herself arms crossed shivering and panting trying to catch her breath. Her body lays there on the stone alter bathed in the warm light shivering as the aftershocks of her orgasm continue to reverberate. He is not there. She is alone. She can hear a distant pleasant laughter…good girl. Catch your breath and we will begin again.
 
teresawrites2u said:
I’m terribly curious about being trained to orgasm on command. Is it an urban legend can a woman really do this? (My eye twitched just thinking about it.) :eek:
Yes, it is possible. It is a process that takes time...some need longer than others, because everybody is different.

It's a great feeling for the Dom who's into power. Think of the quiet little dinner together, in some restruant. Or, at a movie...or just sitting on the couch at a friend's party.

We were at Olive Garden once, and I teased her that I could do it to her, but she didn't want me to so I respected her wishes. I'm sometimes a nice guy. :D
 
DVS said:
Yes, it is possible. It is a process that takes time...some need longer than others, because everybody is different.

It's a great feeling for the Dom who's into power. Think of the quiet little dinner together, in some restruant. Or, at a movie...or just sitting on the couch at a friend's party.

We were at Olive Garden once, and I teased her that I could do it to her, but she didn't want me to so I respected her wishes. I'm sometimes a nice guy. :D

No! You? hehe...I would have liked the story better if you said you did it anyway;)
 
little-nymphe said:
i have been interested in this for some time now. my Dom and i have experimented with some of the topics listed below and Wwe believe we have touched the beginnings of possibilities. i see 4 possibly 5 facets here each seperate but each intertwined to a degree.

my basic understanding of the mentioned topics in this thread...

1. Orgasm Control... That in which a Dominant or Domme will require the sub to not cum until given permission.

2. Orgasm Denial... That in which a Dominant or Domme will not permit the sub to cum for lengths of time anywhere from minutes to days to weeks. Sometimes with teasing bringing close and then backing off. Depends on the situation.

3. Cumming on Command... That in which a Dominant or Domme trains/assists the submissive in learning how to cum when the Dom/me commands it. Either by words or touch.

4. Mind Sex (for lack of a better word)... That in which a Dominant or Domme teaches / assists a submissive into a relaxed state where He/She can take the sub into themselves and to another place. (Something the Dominant suggest locations, sensations, being with the submissive in her mind even if they are a great distance apart.

i am interested in all these aspects, but the hardest to find information on the web is number 4. Either one has to buy an unknown possibly less then credible cd or book or there is a total lack of information.

i know that these 4 items of interest are in some way an individual experience. But it would be nice to see some sort of basic instructions / map to help the Dominant and submissive that are just learning these techniques. It is all well and good when a Dominant is experienced in these to take His/Her sub to these 4 items. But when one is not it is quite difficult.

There is also a 5th subject that i heard someone mention in a earlier reply to this thread and that is sub-space. Having never experienced this myself. i would like to see some sort of basic road map to this as well. Because they are all linked in one form or another.

i know i have touched on many different things as i am new to this thread and have also given my Master this link so He can read the good input thus far. i am just hoping for more information then i have already extracted from the information in this thread.

Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings :) :rose:

Very nice post.

I think there are as many ways as there are individuals in approaching these 4 topics which you have mentioned. As you stated, you understand that this is very much an individualize experience.

There are also different types of orgasms which can occur. For example some have stated that no training was involved at all, but a natural association triggered an orgasm just from hearing the voice of their dominant tell them to cum. The orgasm is certainly a different type of orgasm than say a clitoral stimulated one and different from an orgasm that is genrated through penetration. If you take the time to stop and think what the differences between these orgasms are, you will begin to understand a key concept in this. I have made women cum from nipple stimulation only. I have made women cum from a breath stealing passionate kiss, the kind which leaves you feeling faint, melted inside and out. I have made women cum by sucking and biting their neck only. I have held a woman by her neck till she was so excited she squirted all over herself just from feeling the pressure of my fingertips and the strength of my hand. All of these are not normal ways in which a woman has an orgasm, and even though all of them had some kind of physical stimulation attached to it, one must realize what is "it" that triggered the orgasm or better said, where the origin of the orgasm came from.

One reason why many say a woman makes a beltter lover to another women is simply because they understand that orgasms are not purely physically stimulated. They can be, and yes they can be intense as we all know, however if you ask most women, the truly deep satisfying orgasms are when their mind and emotions are all peaking along with physical stimulation(feelings of surrender, being dominated, feeling loved or cherished). Some will even say that the best orgasms are more mental than physical(meaning the mental aspects and emotional aspects lead the body into a orgasmic response.) Anyone can tie a woman down and stuff a vibrator inside her and work her clit until she cums because that is the way the body works. In fact that can be one of the hardest thing rape victums or those molested have to deal with. Their body may have responded positively feeling pleasure, but inwardly they are striped of their dignity, self respect, and feel they are the bad one, because their body felt pleasure but their mind and heart were raped(I am not saying that pleasure is involved all the time when someone is raped or molested, but it can and does happen and can take years for a person to sort through re-trusting their own bodily pleasures).

The point of this is show that orgasms can be mental/emotional only, physically only or a combination of the two. If you plan to pursue this type of training where you can cum on command, the best place to start would be to focus on what is more of a mental turn on. These can be identified often by thinking about what truns you on. As I mentioned earlier, one such turn on could be the feel of a man's hand wrapped around your neck holding you down and fucking you.

It is important to note here that often the focus is misplaced upon the dominant. This is easily done because the dominant seems to be what causes or triggers the orgasm, however this is not completely true. What is true is that what ever the focus is on what the dominant is doing, that is what's allowing the submissive to "let go" or surrendure to the thoughts and feelings that are overpowering. If you remove the dominant from the equation, you are left basically with masterbation. When you masterbate, you generate these mental images and emotional responses as you think about something that turns you on and then physically stimulate yourself till you have an orgasm. Good practice for this type of training is to see how close a submissive can get to orgasm or to orgasm without any physical stimulation. "If" a submissive can "rev" her own body close to the edge of orgasm with out any kind of physical touching, then you are not far from a domiant speaking at just the right moment to send her over the edge.

Using rythm, triggers and visualization - using the above basic example of a submissive working herself up close to the edge of orgasm with little to no physical stimulation, some things a dominant can use to help push her over the edge are using rythm, triggers and visualization techniques. Examples....

Rythm - when it is clear that the she is panting and close...begin a count down from 10 to 1 slowly. Before hand it is understood that as your voice counts down each number the pleasure inside her with increase building higher and higher...till she is hold back her orgasm desperately wating for you to reach 0 so she can cum. When you reach 0, tell her to cum. Another technique to increase response time is out of the blue give them 30 seconds to cum for you starting now and then count. If they fail to cum in that time, deny them the orgasm and make them wait to give you their orgasm at another time. Next time you bet they will be more mentally ready to meet the time because they want to please you.

Triggers - Used with orgasm control and denial for a period of say two weeks or more, you take her up to the edge of orgasm and back down a number of times until finally you let her cum, but when she does, every time you say something or do something which gives her permission. For example just before you let her cum you place you hand on her shoulder and squeeze holding it tight then say cum. Everytime you allow her to cum you reach up and squeeze her shoulder giving the command or permission to cum. You then remove the oral command after the long peroid and when you are ready to let her cum, slowly let her watch you reach for her shoulder and squeeze...as you do she will cum as the trigger or association has been set. It is important to know that you are still in control of when she cums, however instead of saying it you now can do it with just a touch. Sometimes dirty names spoken at just the right moment can also trigger an orgasm. When the submissive is near the edge, simply lean in and whisper "slut" and you both know ahead of time that slut = cum for me or permission to cum.

Visualization - This is often a combination of both rythm and triggers. An example would be you standing across a room and you either walk slowly step by step towards her or she walks/crawls slowly toward you. With each step closer the desire and pleasure is increased. You can even add in counting with each step to mix in audio with visual. The idea is that when either of you reaches the other, you give the command or permission for her to cum. Again you can after a while remove the audio command and when either of you reaches the other she will cum. Another form of visualization could come from a fetish like cock worship or foot worship. The dominant allowing them to focus on something that drives them to the edge, then when they are there, tells them to cum and they do because they are so excited.

Again I stress that the above has more focus upon the energy welling up from within the submissive. This is not a forced approached but more of the submissive actively engaging her own will, "reving" her own body into a frenzy as she focuses upon that which turns her on, which could be nothing more than the dominant themselves or the dominant doing something to them that makes them wet and ready.

Others have mentioned a more Pavlov's approach. Meaning to train a set of responses weather the submissive want's to or not. This may be consentual but it is still forced. The dominant only allows the submissie to cum in a prescribed manner. Over a long period of time the submissive is conditioned to cum only in this way. The dominant may even force the submissive to cum against their will over and over again until their body is conditioned. In this way the submissive doesnt have to engage mentaly or even emotionally as the dominant can then extract an orgasm from them whenever they wish.

I am not knocking this forced approached. For some this approach is exactly what they truly desire on both the dominant and submissive side. However, this type of training is not my cup of tea. Even though you might use some aspects of this to help jump start training.

Its up to you how you approach this type of training, however some things or steps you can do to help prepare are as follows:

1. Identify what really turns you on mentally and emotionally. Feelings of being controlled or dominated. It may be something a simple as feeling your hair being pulled and you fixate upon that.

2. Practice bringing yourself to the edge of orgasm without or with as little physical stimulation as possible. Continue to work on this until you reach a consistant orgasmic state whenever you are in your dominant's presence.

3. Dominants should use orgasm control techniques, set up audible commands, create special touches, use rythm and vizualization. Remembering you are setting up associations as means of control. You should experiment to she which of the above best works with your submissive.

4. Make sure you both talk about this before you start to see what the real goals of this is. I can see how making a submissive cum in public might have a certain appeal, but for me the goal is more about my own personal control and also allowing my submissive a way of pleasing me. For me this is more of an intamate type of thing and not so much as something just for fun to do. Just be sure you both know where this is leading to and why.

Often people cannot understand how cumming on command is possible, but I think that is because they are thinking of a specific type of orgams like a clitoral or pentration type of orgasm. It is obvious that such orgasms cannot be achieved liked this, but that is not to say other types of mental or emotional orgasms cannot be achieved.

(disclaimer - I have never taught a woman to cum on command in real life. I have taught 2 submissives online in the past 8 years to do so. Take my experience how you like. YMMV)

:cool:
 
Blushing Bottom said:
Many years of attempting such a feat.

:D It really isn't that hard...
First... Find someone who can make you cum... Preferably repeatedly..
Second... Have them say the same thing every time you cum... Preferably right as the orgasm starts..

Repeat as neccessary...(As often as possible)

Third... Have them catch you off guard with the phrase... When you aren't expecting it...
If you can make it work once ...Then it works easier... The more you think about it however ...Generally the worse it works..
:devil:
 
Blushing Bottom said:
Many years of attempting such a feat.
That sentence says a whole lot ya know...and is probably the reason you are still attempting and not doing. As many have said here it does take a lot of being able to "let go" for such a thing to happen. Good luck and have fun getting there.
 
Kajira Callista said:
That sentence says a whole lot ya know...and is probably the reason you are still attempting and not doing. As many have said here it does take a lot of being able to "let go" for such a thing to happen. Good luck and have fun getting there.
I believe you are quite right and I for one intend to remedy that ASAP. Now all I need is a Dom with a sexy voice.
 
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