What do all of you in sexless marriages do for sex?

[AnnieApples]

I was married to a great guy for a few years, and it gradually became clear that he was more or less asexual. It was heartbreaking but we both eventually agreed that divorce was best (no kids or any other complications involved thankfully).

But during those mostly sexless years I read a lot of lit stories, watched plenty of porn, fantasized a lot, and occasionally chatted with my (very sexual) college ex-boyfriend. I felt guilty about it, but as everyone above has described, sexless marriages are tough.

 

[MarionsLover]

I masturbate a lot.
She understands.
Her health issues make sex very uncomfortable/unpleasant now.
So she masturbates too, probably not as often as me, but she does. I just wish she'd want to masturbate with me.
I got through the anger and depression by focusing on the other ways she says she loves me. And we cuddle as much as our bodies will allow.

 

[SunriseMelon]

I find what I am looking for. Sometimes she knows. Sometimes she doesn't.

 

[Bisexguy70]

I found an outlet playing with other men and mutual oral with men. I find it to be very gratifying. I actually look back and wished i would have explored tgis earlier in life. I have explosive and very satisfying orgasms being with men.

 

[trevorness]

Masturbate. But as she works less and is around more, even that is difficult to find time for.

 

[Swuq]

I am bi bottom. I know that about 9 out of 10 of the tops that I have spent time with are in sexless marriages. I fill the void for them. They will get their cocks sucked and fuck a nice tight boipussy. They will also spend time with a slut that most women won’t be.

 

[Justinthedez]

Some of us just manage. Reality is a bitch, but it needs to be handled. For those that don’t believe that that’s possible, you haven’t walked a mile in our shoes. Outside of and in addition to sexless marriages, many if not all of us men here are dynamic individuals who have lives with responsibilities, ailing parents, children of college age with significant tuition bills, soul-sucking relatives and yards to clean and appliances to manage.

Over time, the fact that we are not sexually satisfied, sort of blends into the plethora of other shit that we are not satisfied with. Shit happens.

Amen brother

 

[hulmule]

Some of us just manage. Reality is a bitch, but it needs to be handled. For those that don’t believe that that’s possible, you haven’t walked a mile in our shoes. Outside of and in addition to sexless marriages, many if not all of us men here are dynamic individuals who have lives with responsibilities, ailing parents, children of college age with significant tuition bills, soul-sucking relatives and yards to clean and appliances to manage.

Over time, the fact that we are not sexually satisfied, sort of blends into the plethora of other shit that we are not satisfied with. Shit happens.

Feel the same pain. Some say then get out of the marriage. For what , another that doesn't want it after a while ? You just try to make it do I try to make conversation but it gets ugly sometimes so you just keep driving on that's why we have hobbies

 

[StrongMaster7]

There are 168 hours in a week. My marriage is sexless 167.5 of those.

I watch porn online and masturbate six days a week. It's been that way for close to 40 years.

 

[Justinthedez]

I jerk off a lot. Once in a blue moon I get to do it with a buddy of mine.

 

[littlecordelera]

I get on Lit to try and get some relief. Sad that im a healthy, in shape male that has a high sex drive. But menopause and depression makes my wife have no interest in sex. Try and talk but not a good subject. But sometimes i just take of myself in front of her. Just cant get her involved...Very frustrating when you a high sex drive or just like an amorous person that loves deep kissing and touching..

Since you mentioned menopause, I just wanted to say that hormone replacement therapy (HRT) may help your wife's depression and sex drive. I have seen it do wonders for some of my older friends. You might want to suggest it to her as a six-month experiment with a goal of feeling better both mentally and physically. If it doesn't work or she doesn't like it, she can always stop. Do be aware that it can take time to get the dosages figured out, maybe more than six months. If her primary care physician or OBGYN is not be willing to prescribe HRT, there are doctors out there who will. You may need to search for doctors in your area.

Good luck!

 

[tedsbeds]

Cruise sites like Lit. AM, AFF. Sometimes I get lucky and have the pleasure of a willing lady for a while.

 

[MaleMid50sUK]

Familiar tale here, sexless due to the menopause & other health issues.
Masturbate when I get the chance. Would I cheat? Honestly if the chance came up, not sure I could resist.
Lit & porn do for the most part

 

[Vitriolhack]

At times sexless…

You just cope the best way you can. Sometimes it’s reading a good story, sometimes it’s masturbation and sometimes it’s having coffee in a public cafe enjoying a random conversation with a stranger.

You cope and find alternative stimulating situations.

 

[Lucien_Al]

At times sexless…

You just cope the best way you can. Sometimes it’s reading a good story, sometimes it’s masturbation and sometimes it’s having coffee in a public cafe enjoying a random conversation with a stranger.

You cope and find alternative stimulating situations.

Do those situations remain talk?

 

[Lucien_Al]

Did you ever use Lavalife?

 

[Vitriolhack]

Do those situations remain talk?

Mostly yes, nothing crazy. But that would make a good lit story!

For me, it’s the human contact, talk, intelligent exchange. A lot of flirty situons, especially when you become a regular.

Funny how, many of the same faces find their way in the same cafe.

we stopped seeing people after COVID, unless they dare to show their face on zoom calls. After a while, you get bored of staring at your walls.

I don’t know, people watching has always been a thing for me.

 

[Vitriolhack]

Did you ever use Lavalife?

Talk about a blast from the past!

Is that still around?

 

[Lucien_Al]

Talk about a blast from the past!

Is that still around?

Honestly dont know but was by far my most successful. I would say one in 5

 

[Vitriolhack]

Honestly dont know but was by far my most successful. I would say one in 5

One in 5, great average.

Good conversations are always fun, especially when you are upfront honest with what you are looking for on those sites.

 

[PapaRomantic]

Online relationships help a lot - especially when you can develop them over time and learn that both persons can confide their deepest secrets and desires that they can't really tell anybody in person, and know that there will be no judgment for what you like. It's very fulfilling to have someone close like that when most of my desires would be shot down at home. There are other factors at play in real life that are getting in the way. My online friends understand.

 

[Lucien_Al]

Online relationships help a lot - especially when you can develop them over time and learn that both persons can confide their deepest secrets and desires that they can't really tell anybody in person, and know at there will be no judgment for what you like. It's very fulfilling to have someone close like that when most of my desires would be shot down at home. There are other factors at play in real life that are getting in the way. My online friends understand.

Very true.

 

[Vitriolhack]

Online relationships help a lot - especially when you can develop them over time and learn that both persons can confide their deepest secrets and desires that they can't really tell anybody in person, and know that there will be no judgment for what you like. It's very fulfilling to have someone close like that when most of my desires would be shot down at home. There are other factors at play in real life that are getting in the way. My online friends understand.

I have a thread on that subject; the meaningful conversations you have online and the things you admit to them that you often cannot or would not talk about with your partner.

 

[hulmule]

Did you ever use Lavalife?

What is that ? looking for some new places to vs Lit and porn hub

 

[Lucien_Al]

It was a Tinder type site from the early 2000's