BDSM Flirt

[navarre]

*peeking in*

Dixi? Red? Navarre? Anyone here tonight?


CatEyes

I'm here Cat

 

[CatEyes]

I'm here Cat

Hi Navarre! How are you? It's good to see you.

CatEyes

 

[Daddyslilpet]

I'll do my best to answer. I don't mind doing that here either. If anyone has an objection please let me know and I'll edit this out. Thanks.

Do you think it helped at all to have the online D/s situation? Do you feel it helped you to figure out what you wanted and to learn more?

For me the online thing is what opened my eyes to the feelings I had buried inside me. I really think that it did help me figure some things out, like what I wanted and what I needed to learn more about.

When you approached your husband about it, how did he react? Was he for it right away or did it take him some time to get used to the idea?

When I finally got the nerve to tell my hubby what I was interested in, I thought he was going to laugh at me or freak out, but that didn't happen. He listened to me, processed the info he'd just been given (which is normal for him), he asked me questions galore, and then he said if it was what I really wanted to try to get some information together for us to start with. So my search began, again online, pouring over site after site, and sending him links that I thought were relevant to what we were talking about. Basically we talked, talked, talked, and read, read, read, This really opened up our communication like it had never been before.

Yes I think he took to the idea right away. He at least wasn't closed minded about it, which was the biggest step. But then he's always been the more open minded of the two of us.

There's so much information and there's so much to learn, maybe more so for a Dom. Did he go right into and start reading and researching or was it a slow thing?

See above....but yes he did basically start researching right away.

Were there ups and downs?

Yes we have had ups and downs. We are still after all human. We have also been together for a long time, so at times we do revert to our old ways. However, I don't see this as necessarily a bad thing either. We do get back on track, and we enjoy what we do together regardless of what flavor it takes on.

Did you find it easy to move into areas that weren't as comfortable, like pain for instance? Did he find it easy to move into these areas or was it a struggle?

As for moving into the slightly uncomfy areas, I trust him with my life, body and soul, always have. And I know that he respects me as a whole person. For me moving into the pain (what I like to call sensation) area hasn't been that hard, because I love him and I know he loves me. Sometimes I think (and this is just my feeling on this, not anything he's told me) that he struggles with some of the stuff, but he swears he enjoys everything we do.

I hope I've answered clearly enough. Feel free to ask me about anything that isn't clear as I'm not going back over this .lol Also you can PM me anytime you want.

~smiles~

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Hi navarre.

Cat aren't you so glad you asked all that...lol

 

[navarre]

Hi Cat. I'm well.
Just feeling kinda sad that I didn't pick up that beautiful flogger I saw in Atlanta.

Hi dix.

*moves to Cat...then dix...gives them both a tender kiss on the cheek*

I hope your Master doesn't mind dix.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Thank you navarre, no I don't think Master would mind that. I'm just not allowed to hide things from him, and wouldn't dream of trying to....~smiles~

 

[CatEyes]

Hi navarre.

Cat aren't you so glad you asked all that...lol

Yes, I am! And you answered pretty clearly. Thanks.

Reverting to old ways. Now there's another question. And I guess this all depends on how the relationship is beforehand.

On the BDSM board Dream was talking about how hard it was for her and Art. You and few others said how you understood even though you were married to the person you were with, you basically dealt with the same problems. And someone said that they didn't agree that you had the same problems. Which got me to thinking. Not a good thing. lol

Even though the problems might not be the same exactly. You don't have the trust problem. In a way I would think it would be easier to start off with someone from the beginning in a D/s relationship than to change to one. If you're used to dealing with someone in a certain way. Doing your own thing, never having to ask if it's ok to do something, arguing if you don't agree with something because your way is the better way. It must be really hard to suddenly control that way of interacting. It's so ingraned, how do you change that?

See told you, get me thinking and I don't shut up. lol

CatEyes

 

[CatEyes]

Hi Cat. I'm well.
Just feeling kinda sad that I didn't pick up that beautiful flogger I saw in Atlanta.

Hi dix.

*moves to Cat...then dix...gives them both a tender kiss on the cheek*

I hope your Master doesn't mind dix.

Don't be sad, maybe on your next trip there you can buy it.

mmm...thank you. *hugs navarre*

CatEyes

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Even though the problems might not be the same exactly. You don't have the trust problem. In a way I would think it would be easier to start off with someone from the beginning in a D/s relationship than to change to one. If you're used to dealing with someone in a certain way. Doing your own thing, never having to ask if it's ok to do something, arguing if you don't agree with something because your way is the better way. It must be really hard to suddenly control that way of interacting. It's so ingraned, how do you change that?

YES!! You got what I was trying to say to Dream. Whhooo hooo someone got it. COOOLLLL!! *doing the happy dance*

Ok I'm calm now. I've know my hubby for over 20 years, and up until the last 6 months (almost 7 now) it was strictly vanilla. So changing everything about how you do things after all this time isn't an easy thing to do 100% of the time. It takes lots of work. But in the long run I think its worth the effort if both parties are happy and satisfied.

~smiles~

*happy dancing again*

 

[CatEyes]

LMAO. Dixi you're too much.

I'm sure I'm not the only one who got it. I think anyone who went to D/s after being with someone in a non D/s relationship got it. Unless, like I said, they interacted that way to begin with even without the D/s.

This is the one that really worries me though.

CatEyes *watching Dixi dancing around and shaking my head*

hmmmm....kinda looks like fun, maybe I should join her.

 

[CatEyes]

Navarre, would you like a drink?

I should remember what you drink by now. Something with a twist of lemon or lime. Club soda?

CatEyes

 

[Daddyslilpet]

See Cat that's what I worried about too, but if both are into it then its not that hard to deal with.

and he likes mineral water with a twist of lemon....hehe

~wink~

 

[navarre]

Thank you for remembering dixi.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

You are most welcome kind Sir.

(whew at least I got the lemon part right this time...lol)

Cat, I'm sure navarre would much rather you dance than me. ~wink & grin~

 

[CatEyes]

Guess that's why you're the bartender and I'm not. I should of known that.

CatEyes *making a note, mineral water with a twist of lemon*

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Well that is all I've had to remember so far...hehe.

And Cat you like Malibu Breezes and Strawberry Margaritas.

Hey we're missing Red tonight.

 

[navarre]

I wouldn't mind seeing Cat dance at all dix.

*eg*

I think Red is kinds tired. I heard that she had a long lunch today.
However 2 out of 3 subs isn't bad.

*leaning back watching Cat...waiting for her to dance*

 

[CatEyes]

Well that is all I've had to remember so far...hehe.

And Cat you like Malibu Breezes and Strawberry Margaritas.

Hey we're missing Red tonight.

mmm....banana daquiries are good too or banana and strawberry.

lol, can you tell I have a sweet tooth?

Where is Red? Come out, come out wherever you are.


CatEyes

 

[CatEyes]

I wouldn't mind seeing Cat dance at all dix.

*eg*

I think Red is kinds tired. I heard that she had a long lunch today.
However 2 out of 3 subs isn't bad.

*leaning back watching Cat...waiting for her to dance*

Long lunch?? Should I even ask?

CatEyes

 

[Daddyslilpet]

hehe....navarre that almost sounds like a commercial.... 2 out of 3 subs aren't bad. (oh bad joke...sorry)

Yep Cat I'd say you have a sweet tooth. Me too for that matter. Mmmm strawberry banana margaritas sounds yummy to me.

I guess we can forgive Red if she had a long lunch today...~wink~

 

[CatEyes]

Did Navarre fall asleep? Maybe we should have given him coffee instead of mineral water.

Dixi, do you know how to make banana and strawberry daquiries?

CatEyes

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Well Cat honestly, I'm a really poor choice for bartender....lol.

I'm sure I could figure it out. Don't ya use rum in daquaries?

 

[navarre]

Did Navarre fall asleep? Maybe we should have given him coffee instead of mineral water.

Dixi, do you know how to make banana and strawberry daquiries?

CatEyes

Very funny Cat.
Just leaning in the corner waiting for you to dance for me.

 

[CatEyes]

Well Cat honestly, I'm a really poor choice for bartender....lol.

I'm sure I could figure it out. Don't ya use rum in daquaries?

Well you're better than any of the rest of us.

I think it's rum, I don't know if there's anything else in it though besides that and the fruit.

CatEyes

 

[CatEyes]

Very funny Cat.
Just leaning in the corner waiting for you to dance for me.

Sorry, couldn't resist. *grin*

*swaying* Like this?

CatEyes