Dear Litster...

[asian_princess]

Dear Litster,

I'm sorry.

Lemme help.

*whacks a cold steak on your eye*

Oops.

Lemme be a little gentler.

*slaps the cold steak against your head*

Um.



*hands you the steak*

Dear Litster,

Ow.

You're violent.

You know what will help with that?

A brick in your head.

Oh wait.

Too late







or is that... in your diaper?

 

[Gracie29]

Dear Litster,

Ow.

You're violent.

You know what will help with that?

A brick in your head.

Oh wait.

Too late







or is that... in your diaper?

Dear Litster,

I think it says somethin' that only you are special enough to bring that violence out in me.

*takes the surgically removed brick and throws it at you*

IT WAS IN MY BACKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!

*steals all your seasons of GA*

 

[asian_princess]

Dear Litster,

I think it says somethin' that only you are special enough to bring that violence out in me.

*takes the surgically removed brick and throws it at you*

IT WAS IN MY BACKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!

*steals all your seasons of GA*

Dear Litster,

I'm very special.

Not as special as you apparently, what with a concrete slab in your forehead.

Think of it this way, now we know why you're so hardheaded.

And here we thought it was just cos you're an ass, er, i mean stubborn as a mule.

Dude.

Take them!!

It's your fault Burke left anyway!

Fiance scarer awayerer!

 

[Gracie29]

Dear Litster,

I'm very special.

Not as special as you apparently, what with a concrete slab in your forehead.

Think of it this way, now we know why you're so hardheaded.

And here we thought it was just cos you're an ass, er, i mean stubborn as a mule.

Dude.

Take them!!

It's your fault Burke left anyway!

Fiance scarer awayerer!

Dear Litster,

Yes, you are, honey. *takes the paste away from you*

*blinks*

Dude. You use ANY excuse to bring up my ass and then try to hide it by falsely accusin' me of stubbornness

Snortsnortsnort!

Sadly I know you meant the last statement in a bad way, but I sit here with a smile on my face and feelin' pretty damned pleased

 

[asian_princess]

Dear Litster,

Yes, you are, honey. *takes the paste away from you*

*blinks*

Dude. You use ANY excuse to bring up my ass and then try to hide it by falsely accusin' me of stubbornness

Snortsnortsnort!

Sadly I know you meant the last statement in a bad way, but I sit here with a smile on my face and feelin' pretty damned pleased

Dear Litster,

Careful you don't trip on that when you get on your short bus.

I don't use any excuse!

You're the one telling me about your peach fuzz bum.

*thwacks your smiling face*

Wha?

Mosquito *nods*

 

[Gracie29]

Dear Thwackin' Litster,

*THWACK!*

The expression "just peachy" went someone has just asked how you are does not, in fact, refer to anyone's ass.

Just sayin'.

*******************

Dear Tequila Drinkin' Litster,

Check your freakin' email!

 

[asian_princess]

Dear Litster,

This is for your own good.

*stabs you in the hand with a tranquiliser dart*

There, there.

 

[hdlynnette]

Dear Litster,

I hope your tomorrow is better than your today was.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Litster

You are piqueing my curiosity. Maybe unintentionally, and maybe you won't even realise who you are....but I will know...and I'm enjoying it

 

[kendra1980]

.............................

 

[BradBigBrain]

Dear Litster,

I've got nothing to do and about two more hours to do it. Help!

 

[lovemonster]

Dear Litster,

Give it a rest, you make me want to heave.

 

[sasebrats]

Dear Litster,

Give it a rest, you make me want to heave.

Dear Litster,

Here's a bucket heave in that.

 

[lovemonster]

Dear Litster,

Here's a bucket heave in that.

Dear Thoughtful Litster,

Any chance you could hold my hair back so I don't spew in it?

Ta muchly.

 

[sasebrats]

Dear Thoughtful Litster,

Any chance you could hold my hair back so I don't spew in it?

Ta muchly.

Dear Blondie Litster,
You know I would.

Only for you

 

[MollyDolly]

Dear Litster,

You keep me up late, and I'm still up early- damn you!
wouldn't give it up for another hour's sleep, that's for certain!

 

[lovemonster]

Dear Blondie Litster,
You know I would.

Only for you

Dear Caring Litster,

Got any mouthwash?

Thanks

 

[sasebrats]

Dear Caring Litster,

Got any mouthwash?

Thanks

Dear OMG You smell like puke Lister,

Will Scope work?

You got a little on your shirt.

Would rather not kiss you until you gargle.

 

[lovemonster]

Dear OMG You smell like puke Lister,

Will Scope work?

You got a little on your shirt.

Would rather not kiss you until you gargle.

Dear Repulsed Litster,

C'mere and give me some tongue.

You know you wanna.

 

[NorthernPA4U]

Dear Rather Smug and Snarky Female Litsters,

Trying to relive your school days?

You are a bit old for that.

Actually, I think I shall backtrack and remove the words "a bit" ... they aren't all that accurate.

But, unfortunately, some people never mature.

 

[lovemonster]

Dear Judgmental Lister,

Certain people seem to have the impression it's all about them. Well it ain't.

What happened to finding out facts before leaping to conclusions?

Glad you ain't on jury service.

 

[NorthernPA4U]

Dear jury foreman,

You could be talking about anyone.

But, I see the behavior, and find the behavior is rude and shallow, whoever is the target.

Having sat on juries before, I do look at the physical evidence.

Sincerely,

CSI fan

 

[lovemonster]

Dear Inspector Morse,

How can you judge behaviour without knowing the cause?

Causation does have effect.

Best to know ALL the facts, don't you think?

 

[asian_princess]

Dear Litster,

"All that i know is i'm breathing now.
I want to change the world...instead i sleep.
I want to believe in more than you and me.
But all that i know is i'm breathing.
All i can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now.

All that i know is i'm breathing.
All i can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now.
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now."​

~ Keep Breathing, Ingrid Michaelson.​

​

​

 

[cyikac1986]

Dear Lister,

Tis a shame the more things change the more they remain the same. Self staisfaction is a bitter pill that you will choke on one day. You had better hope that those around you will still care enough to at least smack your back instead of just talking behind it.
And when you are huddled in your room on a cold lonely night, no one to talk to because you have become isolated due to showing your true colors, well, I hope you drown in your self pity.